My family is awesome. Great food. Great wine. No complaints....at Christmas my brother's best friend, who is a concert pianist, comes over and plays a show for everyone after Christmas Eve dinner in the dining room, and the next day we typically go skiing . It's pretty awesome. Not gonna lie.
So your brother brings his "best friend" to holiday gatherings, and the "best friend" is a concert pianist?
My go to move when relatives start quoting stuff from foxnews..."if you are going to mention stuff that isn't factual...you might as well be talking about unicorns." They swear what they heard is true. We go to politifacts.com. Many lols.
Had a coworker over one time for a holiday party and he met my wife's grandfather. Total opposite ends of the political spectrum. Wifes grandfather: Does this TV get Fox News? Coworker: That's the only station my TV doesn't get. WG: really? You are missing all the Sarah Palin footage Coworker: I'd rather burn my own scrotum (after a 6 pack of Sam Adams) His wife promptly took him home.
Beo style El Oh El at my wife taking me home after calling someone out for being a dumbass. Then again a 6 pack hasnt done me in since 10th grade, sadly.
My dad missed Thanksgiving one year. He got so drunk the night before/ morning of. He was at the local VFW playing hold em. Got drunk. Won some. Drove home. Pulled in a field behind an abandoned house on the ride home. Slept in his truck. We found him at home later that afternoon. Where the fuck where you man? We tried calling. All he could say was ahhh im sick but i won X amount.
The coworker picking a needless argument with the grandfather of the host's wife over a television news station at a Christmas Party is more cringe-worthy than an old man and his his particular political leanings imo
My family is the leave-me-alone-live-your-own-life-be-responsible-for-yourself laissez faire conservative Catholic bunch, except my grandpa on my mom's side. He legitimately believes that everything bad is Bush's fault and will interrupt conversations to tell you so. He also doesn't drink and routinely complains about how raw the perfectly medium rare prime rib is every Christmas, all while throwing in jabs at anyone in agriculture outside of the Norman Rockwell subsistence ideology...which is retarded because the rest of us all work in agriculture and farm on the side. Dad's side and now my formerly sports hating mother are all Royals fans. Niece and nephews birthday party in October after I got back from watching the Royals win the pennant, everyone is asking me about the game, looking at pictures I took and here comes grandpa politics, literally barging into the the circle of people watching the video on my phone of the last out, to somehow blame Bush for the Keystone Pipeline. He's the 180 to Fox News. Willing to rent him to some of you guys for the spectacle. Meanwhile, my other grandpa rattles the ice cubes in his glass so someone can freshen his Windsor and says, "you saw a helluva game, that memory is gonna be more valuable than your pictures."
Its 6:23 am. I've now been up since 5 am moving surprise furniture her parents brought down here. They didn't tell me about it so I get woken up and have to go unload a truck loaded with furniture, Kleenex, toilet paper, stools, chairs, basically it's like the Beverly Hillbillies just rolled up. So we now have a couch and love seat that I didn't ask for and I gotta find somewhere to take my couch and a chase lounge on Thanksgiving because we don't have room for everything in our apartment. Yay.
I have to see my damn sister in law today, I could really start a thread just for her stories. She got pregnant when she was 20 and swore she "didn't know" for 6 months which included her 21st birthday. Finally her dad told her she was pregnant because she had packed on about 50 lbs and looked like she was about to pop. Now the kid is 4, she married the baby daddy. My father in law pays all of her bills and earlier this year she told my wife and I, "we are financially set, we are gonna try to get pregnant again." I couldn't hold back the laughter. Now she's 8 months pregnant.
Oh this is the worst a couple of years ago they showed up with a stand up piano. I literally said " what in the fuck do you want me to do with that?"
Watch him go through the line. If he skips something simply walk up to him and say "grandma made those, could be her last turkey day you ungrateful fuck." Then grab his plate and act like your dumping it. Then be all jk bro lolz
I would send him on some endless errand around the house. Like "go take the flag down outside" and hand him a screwdriver. Let him wall around the building a couple times before he knows you don't have one. Then be like "lolz"
Have a random conversation. Then go Serious face: you're a good dude. Not many guys would stay with a woman after finding out she has genital herpes. Walk away.
Wink at him and give him some coy smiles when no one else is looking. Tell him he "looks like he works out," and try to rub his shoulders. These few things should make for quite the uncomfortable day for him....
My mom is one of four sisters. She's the only sane one. Two of the others have already gotten into it. Hooray holidays.
I just assembled 2 different bed frames that I told them were for a twin/full and not a queen sized mattress. Had to move the mattress, box springs, and my now old couch out of the guest room in order to do something I knew wasn't right and then move it all back in again. Yay for holidays and woman logic!
I'm sitting at the counter doing some work and my MIL is calling my FIL trying to get his attention while he's in the middle of cooking. She is secretly holding up a finger for everytime she says his name so she can keep track and then be a bitch to him later about it even though he didn't hear her.
My cousin just turned 16 and is beginning to dress skanky. It will be a civil conversation then later an argument once people start drinking.
Should have just measured them and put your foot down. Water under the bridge tho. Gotta stay strong the rest of the day, there's some grade A fuckery afoot
First thanksgiving away from my family which is fine by me, but missing out drinking white russians and playing adult board games with roonskie bums me out.
It was full on woman logic. Her dad chimed in from the other room that I probably know what I'm talking about, but they weren't convinced. One of the frames is mine for the full sized bed I had in our old guest room. I inform them of this. Nope, still gotta make sure.
update: turns out trump is going to win the presidency, delete the IRS, end corrupt defense spending and dismantle the 2 party system.