So You Have A Daughter....

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by Celemo, Feb 11, 2016.

  1. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    to be fair, the Official Dad's Thread has mostly dads with kids under the age of five...this thread is to share the pain of having a daughter as they blossom into womanhood
     
    Jorts and MODEVIL like this.
  2. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
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    That's a weird sheltered dude who makes me a little sad inside when he goes off the rails about family stuff
     
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  3. Duck70

    Duck70 Let's just do it and be legends, man
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    No kids here. Girlfriend/future fiance is debating if she wants them or nah

    :sixflagsguy:
     
  4. herb.burdette

    herb.burdette Meet me at the corner of 8th and Worthington
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    I have daughters in 5th and 6th grade. I want to punch every boy in their classes.
     
  5. Lefthook

    Lefthook token Oregon State fan
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    oh you poor son of a bitch
     
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  6. $P1

    $P1 Ball State #1
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    [​IMG]
     
  7. Moxin24

    Moxin24 Show me that smile
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    Well I'm officially creeped out
     
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  8. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    everyone who's ever watched that show knows Six was where it's at
    [​IMG]
     
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  9. $P1

    $P1 Ball State #1
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    Definite PAWG

    However, her poor career path....

    Jenna von Oy ‏@JennavonOy Jan 27
    A little teaser for ya: I MIGHT be in the studio recording a Situation Momedy audiobook. Maybe. It's possible.
     
    Celemo likes this.
  10. Taffy

    Taffy Token Brit poster
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    Boys of 7, and 1 week

    [​IMG]
     
  11. London Humphreys

    London Humphreys The next Julian Edelman, obviously.
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    My daughter was born yesterday. This is fine.
     
  12. Constant

    Constant Meh
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    My only daughter is 25. When she was in college, I once arranged to put her on the phone with Celemo

    I'm a bad father.
     
  13. CraigAnne Conway

    CraigAnne Conway Putting that ball into the basketball ring
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    lol what
     
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  14. Constant

    Constant Meh
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    Pretty sure it's a true story.
     
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  15. gamecockdoc

    gamecockdoc Physician on Duty
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    [​IMG]
     
  16. Thoros of Beer

    Thoros of Beer Academy Award-Winning Actor, Tim Allen
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    [​IMG] I'll just leave this here
     

    Attached Files:

  17. Daddy Rabbit

    Daddy Rabbit obviously silly and not productive
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    5 WR Shotgun Post Corner. Hit the WR running a Go on the right. Tricks them everytime.
     
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  18. Daddy Rabbit

    Daddy Rabbit obviously silly and not productive
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    Maybe that was Madden 97
     
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  19. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    It is a true story, she needed my input for a project she was working on while she was at Clemson. It took every ounce of self restraint not to flirt with her out of my respect to my homie Constant. However I would be remiss if I didn't mention that I hounded Constant for several years to send me pics of his daughter and her fine ass friends wearing sundresses at Clemson games when he visited her and he never did it....fucker
     
  20. CraigAnne Conway

    CraigAnne Conway Putting that ball into the basketball ring
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    Hahahaha that's awesome
     
  21. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    She's hot too
     
  22. Jim Brockmire

    Jim Brockmire I think you're wildly underestimating heroin.
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    Two daughters turning 11 and 5 this year. Fortunately they're both enrolled in Catholic school so they won't learn about any of this nonsense until they get to college.
    #blessed
     
  23. oknole

    oknole MC OG
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    4 year old daughter checking in. I'm scared to death.
     
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  24. mb711

    mb711 West Coast Barner
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    Pffft
     
  25. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    :roll: everyone knows Catholic school girls are the biggest sluts...oh wait, is that the joke?
     
  26. arrdub

    arrdub Well-Known Member
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    Damn right.

    FYI, I am you, approx 1 year ahead in time. I'll let you know how it goes.
     
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  27. gamecockdoc

    gamecockdoc Physician on Duty
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    sometimes they don't lose their vaginal virginity though, but they def. do anal and oral
     
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  28. BudKilmer

    BudKilmer Well-Known Member
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    :beerchug:
     
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  29. Mitch Cumstein

    Mitch Cumstein yells at cloud
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    told my daughter that as the primary account holder in everything we own, I can see all of her correspondence. I threw some additional bluff material to strengthen my position and effectively scared the hell out of her.

    Now, my son, knowing the same thing, will do whatever the hell he was gonna do anyway. I fully expect to have to sit him down for a talk after he gets busted for the 2020s equivalent of the 80s 800-dial-a-suck numbers. Or ordering porn ondemand. "That wasn't me!!!". sure it wasn't.

    true story, one of my best friends got busted and told his dad that it was me who ran up the phone bill to 900-Big-Tits, so his dad called mine and I got busted. The one time I really didn't do it, and he demanded that I go apologize. apologies were not made
     
  30. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
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    A mainboarder banged the girl on the right. Not sure which one is jessica.
     
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  31. VaxRule

    VaxRule Mmm ... Coconuts
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  32. Ray McKigney

    Ray McKigney Feel my ubiquity
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    Father of almost 2 1/2 year old girl checking in. Not super worried about all that shit quite yet, although I know it's coming.

    I'm just focused on doing everything I can at this point to be as loving and attentive as possible so as to not create daddy issues which will inevitably lead to cocaine abuse and promiscuity down the line. All I can do is teach her to like/play sports and not have shitty taste in music.

    I really was one of those "hope I never have a daughter guys" but there is no better feeling than hearing "I love you daddy" from my little girl.
     
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  33. 47 straight

    47 straight Well-Known Member
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    Jessica is the one on the right and she's dumber than a box rocks. Would be surprised if only 1 TMBer has been inside of her.
     
  34. gamecockdoc

    gamecockdoc Physician on Duty
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    "good" Catholic girls:

    [​IMG]
     
  35. OZ

    OZ Old balls

    LOL

    I went to Catholic school, congrats on having girls that will fuck in the ass to stay virgins.
     
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  36. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    This is the route I'm taking. I'm constantly reminding her that the most important person to like her is herself and I'm supportive in all of her endeavors. She likes sports and we build playlists for her iPod together
     
  37. BiMaleStripper

    BiMaleStripper Well-Known Member

    Why are you so worried about her having an active sex life with more than one partner especially if you don't hold the same standard for your son?
     
  38. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    That's one hell of an assumption
     
  39. BiMaleStripper

    BiMaleStripper Well-Known Member

    i just assumed since all the other guys in this thread are so worried about their daughters sexual life and not their sons.
     
  40. mb711

    mb711 West Coast Barner
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    Hmm, wonder who this new douche is? Ayo, Ross gtfo here
     
    BudKilmer likes this.
  41. IAHusk

    IAHusk E Pluribus Anus
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    That might have something to do with this thread being specifically about daughters.
     
    -Asshole- likes this.
  42. Constant

    Constant Meh
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    Are we talking multiple partners at the same time?
     
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  43. boone

    boone Destination Unknown
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    same.
     
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  44. AIP

    AIP Team bush
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    Father of a 13 year old boy and I am glad I have nothing really to add to this thread....
     
    hoebekec likes this.
  45. Fuzzy Zoeller

    Fuzzy Zoeller College football > NFL
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    The fact that you don't have daughters is all the evidence one would need to prove there is no God.
     
    Champ likes this.
  46. Moxin24

    Moxin24 Show me that smile
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    It proves God exists and that he knows what he's doing.
     
  47. devine

    devine hi, i am user devine
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    recent pic released of Boo MFer! trying not to respond to this thread

    [​IMG]
     
  48. BhamBammer

    BhamBammer Showtime for Heisman
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    Well if you haven't heard, he DID create the official Dad thread.
     
  49. backinblack23

    backinblack23 Bang Biscut
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    Have a 2 yr old daughter, already dreading the day when I have 2 girls in the house with raging emotions and hormones, hopefully me and the boy can just escape to the basement and veg out for 3-4 days.
     
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