So You Have A Daughter....

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by Celemo, Feb 11, 2016.

  1. Woodrow

    Woodrow Well-Known Member
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    I have 6 and 3 year old daughters and this post gave me heartburn
     
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  2. buckwild

    buckwild #BucketsGetsBuckets
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    Old boss used to say that the difference between having a son and a daughter is that with a son you've only got to worry about one penis.....with a daughter you've got to worry about all of the penises.
     
  3. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
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    Your old boss posted that in this thread. Crazy.
     
  4. ramszoolander

    ramszoolander Known for Buns
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    Three boys here. Watched thread nonetheless.
     
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  5. Constant

    Constant Meh
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    Had 3 boys before getting the surprise girl. Best surprise ever, though.
     
  6. ramszoolander

    ramszoolander Known for Buns
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    [​IMG]
     
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  7. War Grundle

    War Grundle Nole Mercy
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    We just had a our first child a few weeks ago and it was a boy. I'm a little more ok now with having a girl if we decide to have a second since the first was a boy.
     
  8. DuckD

    DuckD Well-Known Member
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    God bless her
     
  9. Constant

    Constant Meh
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    Without question.
     
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  10. DuckD

    DuckD Well-Known Member
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    5.5 year old boy and 4 year old girl. They were at the same daycare together when she was under a year old. One of the boys in my sons class was trying to get near my daughter when she was in her car carrier and my boy (at a little over 2) puts his hand on the boys chest and says, "NO! MY sis."
     
  11. osuagr

    osuagr Well-Known Member
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    i would hope you took him for ice cream afterward.
     
  12. Mitch Cumstein

    Mitch Cumstein yells at cloud
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    [​IMG]
     
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  13. Nole0515

    Nole0515 Well-Known Member
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    we kept telling him he pierce himself shut, but the boy likes eating through a straw
     
  14. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    Kendall has been sick for 2 weeks now. Had to take her to her Dr.s appointment since the wife is ill as well. Yay...they want a urine sample...Double Yay Kendall doesn't understand the instructions
     
  15. BuckeyeRiot

    BuckeyeRiot Team Nicki
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  16. visa

    visa Well-Known Member
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    Turns out she was really bored
     
  17. Constant

    Constant Meh
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    Daughter stories: My daughter delivered her own child, at home, by herself. Her 2yo was there, but he slept thru it and was no help. She's kind of a badass.
     
  18. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    Kinda what I'm thinking tbqh
     
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  19. WhiskeyDelta

    WhiskeyDelta Well-Known Member
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    Five year old daughter. She's a badass though. Rock climbs, can do pull-ups, has a six pack, and will take headers off her bike/scooter and walk them off. She's awesome.
     
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  20. kmac1231

    kmac1231 Well-Known Member
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    14 year old daughter. Tall, athletic...
    I'm in trouble.

    Good thing is her first "Boyfriend" ended up cutting himself after they broke up so it gives me great joy in reminding her of it if she even looks at other boys.
    I even over heard her tell a friend that her Dad was right about Boys. LOL

    I know what scumbags they are, I was/am a scumbag.
     
  21. ramszoolander

    ramszoolander Known for Buns
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    Pics?

    /acongressmanpost
     
  22. AIP

    AIP Team bush
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    if that's the case where is the thread for dad's with teenage boys..... ?
     
  23. kmac1231

    kmac1231 Well-Known Member
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    Ha. No. and fuck you.

    [​IMG]
     
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  24. Baron

    Baron Well-Known Member
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    There isn't. Start one imo.
     
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  25. Jorts

    Jorts "Ask about my Mortgage Services"
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    About the time it began with my 13yr old step-daughter... it only gets worse
     
  26. Daniel Ocean

    Daniel Ocean I only lied about being a thief
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    I wonder about the dudes that worry about having daughters. Are your moms and wives huge whores?

    Learn to raise your sons and daughters and we won't have to worry. I have sons and daughters and worry about them equally about different things.
     
  27. ramszoolander

    ramszoolander Known for Buns
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    :beerchug: joke was poorly executed

    just like your gif SWOOSH
     
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  28. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    Kendall: Daddy, when I'm older, Can I work at Hooters?
    ((Celemo almost crashes car))
     
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  29. VaxRule

    VaxRule Mmm ... Coconuts
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    It seems like she is actively trying to get you to kill yourself.
     
  30. Bruce Wayne

    Bruce Wayne Billionaire Playboy
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    What the fuck is wrong with you?
     
  31. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    Sooooo Kendall got all super excited about starting her period...showed mom her undies. It was a skid mark :facepalm:
     
  32. RoyalShocker

    RoyalShocker But I don't wanna be a Nazi
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    Ignore thread
     
  33. Daniel Ocean

    Daniel Ocean I only lied about being a thief
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    [​IMG]
     
  34. Constant

    Constant Meh
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    Pics or it didn't happen.
     
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  35. 00:06:00

    00:06:00 Didnt like me then, gonna hate me now
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    Seems like teaching her to wipe properly should be pretty high on the list.
     
  36. Constant

    Constant Meh
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    Possibly the most heinous post of my glorious career.
     
  37. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    And if you've never ever skid marked your fudgies as a fucking child, you are a better person than most of us
     
  38. spagett

    spagett Got ya, spooked ya
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    And even worse, she still hasn't drawn a picture of Dee Brown popping the jersey.

    Celemo
     
  39. 00:06:00

    00:06:00 Didnt like me then, gonna hate me now
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    Im sorry but if your 10 year old daughter cant recognize shit in her panties...somewhere down the line you have failed as a parent.
     
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  40. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    Ok
     
  41. London Humphreys

    London Humphreys The next Julian Edelman, obviously.
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    Assuming it was a raquet ball induced shitting.
     
  42. RoyalShocker

    RoyalShocker But I don't wanna be a Nazi
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    Celemo's kids are going to have a god awful time when someone from their school stumbles across this board and puts 2 and 2 together.

    Some stuff doesn't need to be shared, I humbly submit.
     
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  43. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    Thank you for your input, I'm pretty sure my kiddos will be fine
     
  44. Corky Bucek

    Corky Bucek Placeholder for a Custom Title
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    Ignore him he's the resident Alabama tweaker. Looks like he recently came off of a couple month bender and started posting again.
     
  45. devine

    devine hi, i am user devine
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    This thread was a good time now I want to puke
     
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  46. 00:06:00

    00:06:00 Didnt like me then, gonna hate me now
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    Hello, um yes, my name is celemo. I have a 10 year old daughter, whom you've all seen pics of at this point.....anyway she shit her panties the other day and thought it was period blood.

    Hilarious, right!!

    Gimme all your likes!~!
     
  47. devine

    devine hi, i am user devine
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    Yeah that post was a little much
     
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  48. 00:06:00

    00:06:00 Didnt like me then, gonna hate me now
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    you should litetrally be taken out and fucking shot
     
  49. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    Oh sorry guys I created this thread to chronicle the trials and tribulations of having a daughter. Sorry you didn't like my post. Fuck off
     
  50. devine

    devine hi, i am user devine
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    You're overreacting, Celemo