The addiction thread: A safe place for questions or advice or really anything

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by fattus, Feb 3, 2016.

  1. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    I've seen posters ask about an addiction thread and I've even been asked to start it so, here goes.

    1. Please feel comfortable posting here. This will be a place for education, enlightenment, advice, help, sympathy, encouragement or whatever you hope to get out of it.
    2. This thread is not just for addicts. Everyone is welcome.
    3. No judging.
    4. Don't be a douche.
    5. Be honest. If you're not honest then you are handcuffing any response before it begins.
     
  2. joe-

    joe- yesterday is a hard word for me
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    I dated an alcoholic who was dual diagnosed with bipolar/depression for a couple of years, so I've had the pleasure of learning about addiction from both perspectives. I've also learned that codependency is a really rough thing and that I basically became addicted to her disease
     
  3. Nole0515

    Nole0515 Well-Known Member
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    I've always had a problem with alcohol. I've been blacking out almost everytime I drink lately and when I get near blacked out I try to find coke. I absolutely hate it cause I'm a huge asshole like most when I get hammered when I used to just be a fun guy when I party. I hate what I'm becoming. Havent had a drink since Friday night and am trying to work on not drinking ever again cause I know what will happen. One thing I wish would happen is that my parents sit me down and talk to me about it, but I know it wont happen cause my dad is a huge asshole with a drinking problem. I've tried to stop before and it normally only last a month or so and I end up doing the same shit over again.
     
  4. joe-

    joe- yesterday is a hard word for me
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    Have you thought about trying AA? I've been to several meetings (as a support system) and I actually quite enjoyed them
     
  5. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    My drug of choice is alcohol. I have been an alcoholic for 26 years. I have tried multiple times to quit, most of that in the last 3 years. In the last year alone I have done detox three times. I have never made it past 32 days without a drink. Currently, I am on day 26 without a drink. Right now I am in a group called dual diagnosis recovery. It is for people with an addiction and also a chronic disease. My disease is Rheumatoid Arthritis which was diagnosed in October. This group is the best I have ever attended. It's really been helping and I've only been going for a month. When I was diagnosed I was in the first month of yet another recovery and the wheels fell off. I was devastated. At the time, I did not give a shit about anything anymore. I didn't even care about getting better. I sank into depression and what began as a few drinks to help with anxiety and pain devolved into my old ways. This is just one of my many tales involving relapse. The good thing, though, is that I am trying again. Some who suffer relapse never come out of it. Many come out only to relapse again. If at first you don't succeed, try, try again.
     
  6. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    Codependency is the most common thing I see and hear from others either with an addiction or close to someone who has one. The two best things someone close to an addict can do are Al-Anon or going to see an addiction counselor together.
     
  7. joe-

    joe- yesterday is a hard word for me
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    I actually am going to start Al-Anon next week. The biggest thing I had to realize (and what addicts need to realize) is that nobody is alone in this process
     
  8. Nole0515

    Nole0515 Well-Known Member
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    I was thinking about it and looking at it Sunday for the first time. I'm not sure how I will fit into it as Im rather shy and nervous around people I dont know when I dont have a drink in my hand
     
  9. devine

    devine hi, i am user devine
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    How do you actually know if you're an alcoholic or not
     
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  10. joe-

    joe- yesterday is a hard word for me
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    Just remember that everyone in that meeting with you is there for the exact same reason
     
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  11. RonBurgundy

    RonBurgundy Well-Known Member

    Hi there, provider of pills here.

    How much money do pills cost on street? Curious on all classes, opioids, benzos, stimulants, whatever.
     
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  12. shaolin5

    shaolin5 Well-Known Member
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    I am a codependent. No doubt about it. I was in a relationship with an addict and I almost lost everything due to my (completely false) belief that I could fix her. *spoiler alert* I could not
     
  13. joe-

    joe- yesterday is a hard word for me
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  14. devine

    devine hi, i am user devine
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    Congrats man keep up the good work
     
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  15. joe-

    joe- yesterday is a hard word for me
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    Me and you need to talk
     
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  16. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    I know that having your parents sit you down would be the world, but usually that only happens to those who don't want it. I cannot tell you how many times I have cried myself to sleep because "my mommy" can't help me. It would mean the world if she could but, in my case, she can't. She wouldn't know where to begin. It's very difficult for a non-addict to understand what is going on in the addict's mind. It is doubly difficult to know how to help.

    Having said that, there are many, many avenues of support available to those who seek it. Some may work for you and some may not. If one doesn't, look for another. I know people where AA has worked for them. I know others, myself included, where it doesn't. The first thing I would recommend to anyone is to make an appointment with an addiction counselor. I know availability and cost could be issues but if you can, do it. If you can't, well, try AA or Liferay or there is a sports group (I forget the name off-hand....have a flyer at home). The biggest thing isn't immediate success. The biggest things are self-realization and doing something, anything, no matter how miniscule.
     
  17. Arkadin

    Arkadin inefficiently efficent and unclearly clear
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    xanax is about 5 dollars for 2mg. stuff like oxy is a dollar a mg. klonopin will usually run you 2-3 dollars for 1 mg, 3-5 bucks for 2 mg. adderall, vyvanse like 3-5 bucks a pill, but it doesnt really have a standard as its usually just a friend to friend transaction
     
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  18. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    Very cool! My girlfriend goes and she says it helps a lot.
     
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  19. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    Not a problem. Just go and listen. No one is going to pressure you into anything.
     
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  20. Jake Scott

    Jake Scott Well-Known Member
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    This was me 10 years ago. Where do you live? Do you do this with your friends every weekend?

    I was born and raised in Athens. I used to party extremely hard. I've take a best friend to the hospital as he was having a heart attack multiple times. It took all of us leaving. I moved to Charlotte, North Carolina and got my shit together. Never went back to Athens. I still battle pill addiction due to back problems, but I am not dependent on them. I can now, a decade later, drink a few beers/drinks without getting blackout.
     
  21. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    What makes you question whether you (or someone else) are an alcoholic or not? What behaviors?
     
  22. joe-

    joe- yesterday is a hard word for me
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    That's cool. I'm actually kind of excited. My mom wants to go with - she battled alcoholism when I was a kid and it strained our relationship quite a bit. I was finally able to talk with her about it after dealing with a similar situation with my ex, and it actually brought us closer
     
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  23. Nole0515

    Nole0515 Well-Known Member
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    I live in Tallahassee, most of the time this happens I go out by myself. I end up having a couple beers then go to straight Liqour and drink Vodka or Bourbon like its water. This past Friday I decided to grab a drink at a fine dining place that the bartenders know me. Had one Bourbon and met some people at the bar that led to another then switched to wine. left with the bartenders and patrons at the bar to a wine establishment raked up 120 dollar bill not rembering shit and lost my sweater somewhere along the way walking around all night blacked out in 38 degree weather until I came out of my black out at around 4ish in the morning
     
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  24. Jake Scott

    Jake Scott Well-Known Member
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    You've got to move. Hardest thing I've ever had to do. Now I'm watching my brother go through the same thing.

    You have to change your scenery imo.
     
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  25. Nole0515

    Nole0515 Well-Known Member
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    Thats something I cant do. I have a business here to run that will be mine in the next 5 years
     
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  26. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    I'm not downplaying anything, but that's a typical night for a binge drinker. You've not had a drink since Friday and good on you for that. See if you can make it another day. Tell yourself now that you're not going to drink tonight. Then go for one more. Tomorrow morning when you wake up, tell yourself, "I'm not going to drink today."
     
  27. miles

    miles All I know is my gut says, maybe
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    Day 4 of no dipping.

    My caffeine intake has increased 3 fold
     
  28. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    A change of scenery can help, but often it's not the scenery at the root of the problem. For some, yes, it could very well be the root, but more often than not it is not.
     
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  29. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    I feel you. I'm completely addicted to tobacco. I've never been able to go more than a day or two without.
     
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  30. Jake Scott

    Jake Scott Well-Known Member
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    It was just me relating and telling him what helped me. I'm not a professional
     
  31. Jake Scott

    Jake Scott Well-Known Member
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    I did as well. I left my family bar/restaurant business.
     
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  32. AptosDuck

    AptosDuck Pedantic Hausfrau
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    My dad did AA in 1990, after crawling inside a vodka bottle for most of my childhood (he was a goofy drunk and not an angry one, so his behavior was more embarrassing for me, but not a source of fear). A year later he'd relapsed something awful, and it wasn't until the rest of the family had turned their backs on him that he realized he needed to get his shit together for real. He and his GP found an intensive therapy rehab program, 3-hour psychotherapy four times a week, that tore his mental insides wide open and allowed him to understand his drinking motivations and then gave him effective tools to fix himself. I credit that program for saving his life, back in 1993. He didn't touch alcohol for nearly 20 years after that. He started drinking again in his early 70's, a few years ago, but from what I can tell he seems to be able to drink lightly and in moderation.

    Sister went through inpatient alcohol rehab in 1990, at 28. It got her dried out but she didn't fix her underlying problems. On and off the wagon since. She did OK for a few years in the early 2000's when she was living with the local chapter president of NA, and she got involved in that community. Even then, though, she maintained that they had problems but she didn't. She then got addicted to oxy/fentanyl by prescription for a shoulder issue, and after six years of watching her go downhill we staged an intervention to get her clean (at one point I was on the phone with the pain doc's office asking them what it took to stop giving her more opioids, and the person on the other end of the line replied that "as long as they don't drop the pen when they're signing for it, we'll keep giving it to them"). She stayed cleanish for a few years, but it didn't take. She's now in the process of being kicked out of her son's house (lost her job and her boyfriend kicked her out of their house) because she's been hiding liquor bottles under her bed in the room she shares with her 8-year-old step-grandson. She's 53, has nothing to show for her life of addiction and bad decisions, and blames everybody else for her problems. I figure she'll die soon, alone.

    Dunno what the point of my story was, but AA doesn't take for everybody. Whatever course of rehab action anybody takes, the most important step is to admit you have a problem. The next most important thing to remember is to get clean for yourself, not for others.
     
  33. boone

    boone Destination Unknown
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    nice thread.

    I fortunately don't have a problem with addiction but I've come close in my life. Smoked a ton of weed in my life. Yea, yeah. . .its just weed and I agree with that thinking. It may not be "addictive" but when you quit you crave that shit on many levels. Feel, taste, smell , your ritual. .. .

    I had a coke period but it was getting a little too creepy for me and I hated the feeling when it ran out. The fucking worst.

    I'm not an alcoholic but I can drink. I's also at the age where I know what I can't, drink. Pink wine, Jagr, MD 20/20. . .these thing turn me into a total cock face. I also can't mix booze I can only stick with one. If I mix. . .I black out, which seems to happen a lot lately. I don't remember shit like going to bed, talking with my wife, having sex. I don't know why this is but yeah. I'm probably drinking more than I should. Part of that is because I'd rather just roll a J and chill, but since its illegal still it's out of the question now that I'm married with kids.

    So in short. Since alcohol is legal, it's become a vice. FML.
     
  34. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    Please don't take my post as criticism. I understand that's what worked for you and I'm glad you shared. As I said, it could work but I was just putting out there it might not.
     
  35. WolverineJack

    WolverineJack Nature made me a freak.
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    Addicted to dip. After a year of marriage, it has slowed down. I probably only do 3 cans a week. Used to be about a can a day when I was active duty. Have gone on streaks of 3-4 days of not doing it. Have tried the alternatives such as sunflower seeds and gum. I am 28 now, hope to stop soon, told myself last year I wouldn't do it after 30.
     
  36. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    This reminds me of an old friend who is fresh in my mind right now. I haven't seen him in a few years since our friend's funeral. He called me about a week ago and we had a good talk. We started talking about my addiction and my RA and how I am handling it. Throughout the whole conversation, though, his questions were all along the lines of, "What drug can you use to replace alcohol?" Then I realized that this is him. He's never really been completely addicted to any one thing in his life but at any given point in time he must have a drug to rely on. He could not comprehend that I am giving up alcohol without another drug to replace it. That behavior is foreign to me, so I can't really comment on it other than acknowledging its existence. It is something I have been planning on asking my LCSW at our next appointment, though (next week). I will share after our session.
     
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  37. Vandy

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    Please know that if you are a daily drinker quitting cold turkey can kill you. Alcohol withdrawal and delirium tremens are serious and potentially life-threatening. Please seek medical help first if you are trying to quit drinking.
    I have seen it. It is horrible. Feel free to ask any questions.
     
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  38. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    Thank you! I was going to post this in my first followup and spaced it. I did a non-medical detox once. Never again.
     
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  39. shaolin5

    shaolin5 Well-Known Member
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    I always heard there was:
    Using (drinking alcohol)
    Abusing (getting hammered drunk on weekends)
    And Dependent (Unable to get through the day without drinking alcohol)
    Obvi option 3 means you have a problem
     
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  40. Jake Scott

    Jake Scott Well-Known Member
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    I didn't. I was just letting you I was telling him my experience and what helped me. As maybe an option for him; whether it's a short time like rehab or for good.

    Places like Tallahassee and Athens are trap college towns. It's what they are built on. I've got a lot of my friends I grew up with stuck in that trap.
     
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  41. Jake Scott

    Jake Scott Well-Known Member
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  42. Vandy

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    The pneumonic CAGE is a diagnostic tool used by providers to assess for potential problems with alcohol.

    C - cut down, as in have you ever felt you should cut down on your drinking?
    A - annoyed, as in has anyone ever annoyed you by criticizing your drinking?
    G - guilt, have you ever felt bad or guilty about your drinking?
    E - eye opener, have you ever had a drink first thing in the morning to get over a hangover or calm/steady your nerves?

    1 point for each question you answer yes. A score of 2 or more is clinically significant.
     
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  43. devine

    devine hi, i am user devine
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    Shit
     
  44. TrustyPatches

    TrustyPatches Life is is a bunch of ups and Caleb Downs
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    Spot on




    Fuckin druggy
     
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  45. Arkadin

    Arkadin inefficiently efficent and unclearly clear
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    lol actually i dont even like pills except for the occasional xanax on a plane. ive just been around/done a lot of dumb shit
     
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  46. Lyrtch

    Lyrtch My second favorite meat is hamburger
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    For males >14 drinks a week is the medical line.

    The other side is psychosocial, so basically if it negatively impacts your life but you don't change intake or usage patterns it's a problem.
     
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  47. Arkadin

    Arkadin inefficiently efficent and unclearly clear
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    i guess i understand the need for a line, but that seems stupid
     
  48. Lyrtch

    Lyrtch My second favorite meat is hamburger
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    Why?
     
  49. Arkadin

    Arkadin inefficiently efficent and unclearly clear
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    i just dont understand how a drink number can make you medically an alcoholic. there are lots of people who can have 14 drinks a day friday and saturday and then not touch the stuff until the next weekend, or whenever they feel like it

    it seems like a hard distinction to make when you also have to factor in other things that determine how many drinks you have
     
  50. Lyrtch

    Lyrtch My second favorite meat is hamburger
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    It's in relation to harming your body I believe. As in your liver isn't a fan when the drinking gets excessive.