why are people with downs so cocky?(Thread lives on - need more stories)

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by Soup, Jun 17, 2010.

  1. Biff Bridges

    Biff Bridges The words. You are good with the words man
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    Isn't that an incredible waste of time and resources? Why wouldn't we try and find a job or something they enjoy doing and help them learn that? Maybe that's what they're doing but I doubt it.
     
  2. Arkadin

    Arkadin inefficiently efficent and unclearly clear
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    some people are too retarded for that. there really isnt anything they can do besides school, its good for them interaction wise imo
     
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  3. buckwild

    buckwild #BucketsGetsBuckets
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    <3 this thread....need more stories...
     
  4. Nostradumass

    Nostradumass Well-Known Member
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    Best part. Just so perfect.
     
  5. Nostradumass

    Nostradumass Well-Known Member
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    holee cow

    I'm going to spend the rest of my week just finding people to share this story with.
     
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  6. lastcup

    lastcup Well-Known Member

    Bump because I was googling trying to find dabo pic and was directed to this thread.
     
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  7. THF

    THF BITE THE NUTS, THUMB IN THE ASS!
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    TMB - producing ridiculous google results for everyone.
     
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  8. phunkybuck

    phunkybuck Your pennies have been in my ass
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  9. Soup

    Soup Legend in the making
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    bump, i needed a few laughs this morning
     
  10. Whammy Business

    Whammy Business Well-Known Member
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    First time I've read this thread. So great.
     
  11. buckwild

    buckwild #BucketsGetsBuckets
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    Yeah, this is one of the funniest threads that I've ever read on TMB.
     
  12. Cut68

    Cut68 Well-Known Member

    We had a downy in wood shop class. The teacher owned an apple orchard as well and would sell apples and cider to students on the side. One day the kid was asking what cider tasted like and we told him it was great but you had to drink a half gallon at a time. He downed the whole jug and spent the rest of the day in the bathroom with the shots. Comes in the next day and does the same thing. Shop teacher cut him off after that.

    Yes, the worst part of this story is, in fact, that they put the kid in shop class. Miracle he still has his fingers
     
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  13. Rusty Shackleford

    Rusty Shackleford Dale 1 - Rats 0
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    This is by far one of the funniest threads on this site. My stories aren't really that funny but I did grow up with a special needs kid. Jonathan is a great guy and has a mild form downs which led to some humorous situations. I went to school with him growing up and he also went to my church. I guess the common theme for him was he didn't give a damn. He would grab girls asses giggle and run off. He would also sing loud and deep in church like he was an oprea singer. You could easily pick his voice out if you were sitting within 50 feet of him. He also had terrible timing so he would hold notes too long through the pauses and make everyone giggle (we were like 12). He also loved basketball (he was terrible) and his go to shot was the wilt skyhook. I guess the most memorable story was when he shit his pants in second grade walking to the cafeteria. Once again he didn't give a fuck that shit was dripping off his pants he just kept walking, determined to get those chicken nuggets even though he was leaving a trail for 100 yards. Most of my memories from elementary school are pretty hazy but I will never forget the exact spot we were in (right in front of the art room door), what he was wearing (black velcro tennis shoes, blue jeans and a navy turtleneck) and the WTF look on his face when the teacher told him he had to go to the office and get cleaned up instead of getting his chicken nuggets. We had to walk in a line and the majority of the class was dodging his shit trail and the teacher finally discovered something was up. I really did liked the kid because you will never meet a sweeter human being. Somehow he got my cell phone number and still calls me from time to time. That kid can always bring a smile to my face. I am upset that I didn't appreciate him more when I was younger and got to interact with him regularly.
     
  14. a.tramp

    a.tramp Insubordinate and churlish
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    I was lifeguard at a camp way back when

    A state representative's son was allowed to go for his swimming tag to have access to the waterfront

    This little smug prick was about 1/16th way through the swim and went for his best titanic impersonation

    I jumped in and attempted a textbook rescue and this little prick about drowned us both trying to fight me off with his super retard strength

    I'm pretty sure I ended up dragging him out by his hair

    Mr state representative wanted me to let him try again because his son got scared and I said take a hike
     
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  15. Zap Branigan

    Zap Branigan I suffer from a very sexy learning disability.
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    ohhaithur wet from downy still makes me laugh
     
  16. ohhaithur

    ohhaithur e-Batman
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    I go back to that same hotel tomorrow. Nice timing on the bump
     
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  17. Craig Pettis

    Craig Pettis Que será será motherfucker
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    I believe this is going to be the next thread I read from start to finish
     
  18. hamsterdam

    hamsterdam I wish I knew how to quit you.
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    wut
     
  19. Soup

    Soup Legend in the making
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    lets hope history repeats itself
     
  20. miles

    miles All I know is my gut says, maybe
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    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    Im laughing really hard right now
     
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  21. Joey Freshwater

    Joey Freshwater Slingin The Pipe Since 75
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    Such a quality bump.
     
  22. Napoleon Bonerfart

    Napoleon Bonerfart Well-Known Member
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    I enjoy this board but fuck every single one of you guys that are making fun of people with downs. You really should be ashamed of yourselves.
     
  23. Whammy Business

    Whammy Business Well-Known Member
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    :devine:
     
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  24. Nostradumass

    Nostradumass Well-Known Member
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    You are worse than a guy with downs.

    At least downy people are funny.
     
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  25. Llama

    Llama New Member
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    Bump
     
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  26. Boar Skarloff

    Boar Skarloff Standin up fuckin in a hammock

    Momdukes taught Special Ed growing up. I could fill a book with stories....

    One guy was a good buddy of mine named Orlando. Mom taught him in first grade and he was always pretty slow mentally. He somehow made grades to come out for ball though, and he was a helluva running back. Mom took us to the KofC pool after practice once and me and him were in the deep end checking out chicks sunbathing. They'd lay down on their stomachs and I was showing Orlando how you could see some side-titty if you looked just right. I got out to get a Coke and he comes with me and I turn around and his dick had managed to come out of the front of his shorts. Fucker had to be 12" long and he was ready to roll. I pushed him back into the pool, but a lot of people saw it. He just laughed, never had any idea what happened.

    We always took one girl named Amy home, and one day she kept complaining in the van about how bad she had to go to the bathroom. We get to her house and start up the sidewalk and she yanks her shorts and drawls down to her ankles and starts waddling/hopping/stumbling to the front door. She made it to the bathroom, but the weird part was no one said a word, like it was some normal deal. I couldn't quit laughing so I wound up getting in trouble.

    Had another one named Jason who would try to do absolutely ANYthing that anyone else did. I had a friend who could run up on a tree trunk and flip himself completely backwards. Ole Jason gave it a whirl, made it halfway and lawnchaired himself. The sound of him getting the wind knocked out of him and the aftermath remains one of the funniest things I've ever witnessed. He once wanted to play basketball with us once so we let him, and he kept wanting to be skins. Fine Jason, we'll be skins.. He takes off his shirt and he'd drawn about 10 circles, getting sequentially larger around his nipples with a blue pen. We were in cafeteria once and a fight broke out and Jason jumps on a table to get a better look, and takes a header from a ceiling fan that had to have been running at about 5000rpm. Damn thing hadn't been cleaned in years and dust went every-fucking where. Split his head wide open. I got asked to leave my 5th period class because I couldn't make myself stop laughing.

    People are people, and funny stories are funny stories, but they were literally the most loyal, honest people you'd ever want to be around.
     
  27. leroi

    leroi -
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    this is the thread that i think compelled me to sign up for tmb the first time
     
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  28. BIGASSTITTIES

    BIGASSTITTIES Fan of: BIGASSTITTIES
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    This thread is so wrong.
     
    #528 BIGASSTITTIES, Mar 13, 2016
    Last edited: Jun 28, 2017
  29. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
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    Sweet Mary I forgot how much these stories crack my shit up. The table jump, ceiling fan scene got me.
     
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  30. Joe_Pesci

    Joe_Pesci lying dog-faced pony soldier
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    :roll: that whole story is gold but my god, two saltines and construction paper
     
  31. BIGASSTITTIES

    BIGASSTITTIES Fan of: BIGASSTITTIES
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  32. ohhaithur

    ohhaithur e-Batman
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  33. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    :/
     
  34. Stagger Lee

    Stagger Lee Crazy. Sexy. Cool.
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    While I wasn't in Horticulture III with you, I have heard this story from at least 5 different people who were in that class. I must say, old friend, you tell it the best.

    Might be my favorite post in TMB history.
     
  35. eHo

    eHo Fan of teams that never win shit and the Seahawks.
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    dallasdawg doesn't have downs, he was just super stoned.
     
  36. daddy fat sacks

    daddy fat sacks shoulda bought an ounce but you copped a dub
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    Fantastic thread. Reading this made sitting with my pops doing chemo much more enjoyable.

    Had this one tard in HS who thought whenever he shook hands, it means he had sex so he would refuse to shake hands with any of the guys at school and would chase girls around trying to get a handshake. He would make orgasm sounds when he shook a girls hand and because he didn't have Tim Tebow-esque tard strength and was harmless the girls played along. At the end of the day he'd always rattle off a long list of girls with whom he had sex with that day.

    I once got asked out by a downie, named Melanie, via love letter in the middle of PE Sr. year.

    She handed it to me and stared at me while I read it while hanging with my football teammates all down'd up and doe eyed. Then my teammate took it from my hand and showed everyone while dying laughing. Melanie ran away mortified.

    i ended up getting yelled at for this, getting called an asshole jock, and having no heart.

    Yeah, the guy who is nice enough to the ese kids that one misconstrued it for romantic feelings is an asshole, meanwhile you encouraging this girl to do this on the middle of PE in front of all my teammates? GTFO you shitty handler.

    Every now and then her face will flash in my head while I'm jerking off. Sometimes I wish I had fucked her just to see what it'd be like....
     
  37. Tobias

    Tobias dan “the man qb1” jones fan account
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    yall went to myers park?
     
  38. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    Fuck.
     
  39. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    be like being a baylor football player
     
  40. bhrangerfan0809

    bhrangerfan0809 Sprinkles are for Spelling Bee Winners™
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    fuuuucccckkk
     
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  41. Stagger Lee

    Stagger Lee Crazy. Sexy. Cool.
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    Yeah. Class of 2002.
     
  42. Voodoo

    Voodoo Fan of: Notre Dame
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    I was nodding my head in agreement and understanding until I got to that last sentence.
     
  43. daddy fat sacks

    daddy fat sacks shoulda bought an ounce but you copped a dub
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    Imagine how that makes me feel...

    She is so gross too.... I'm a weird fuck. Oh well :-/
     
  44. Merica

    Merica Devine pls stop pointing out my demise. :(
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    [​IMG]
     
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  45. Tobias

    Tobias dan “the man qb1” jones fan account
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    sad i missed that teacher. i was 05-09
     
  46. kinghill

    kinghill Cool American Flavour
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    [​IMG]
     
  47. We$tTxO&G

    We$tTxO&G Well-Known Member
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    [​IMG]
     
  48. bertwing

    bertwing check out the nametag grandma
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  49. Stagger Lee

    Stagger Lee Crazy. Sexy. Cool.
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    I gather that Mr. Randall checked out sometime around 1989, so I think we both missed him.
     
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  50. Nostradumass

    Nostradumass Well-Known Member
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    it was very hard not to laugh when a commercial for that show played in the theater last night.