So You Have A Daughter....

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by Celemo, Feb 11, 2016.

  1. bertwing

    bertwing check out the nametag grandma
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    A bammer knows how to handle a dick, shocker
     
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  2. 00:06:00

    00:06:00 Didnt like me then, gonna hate me now
    Donor TMB OG

    is that really the best you can do? Take that old weak ass shit to the nursing home. Just watch out for Robert Earl Jr the 3rd
     
  3. 00:06:00

    00:06:00 Didnt like me then, gonna hate me now
    Donor TMB OG

    hey I got more bars than you bertfag, clearly I am superior
     
  4. bertwing

    bertwing check out the nametag grandma
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    you are stupid
     
  5. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    this guy is a staff member?
     
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  6. bertwing

    bertwing check out the nametag grandma
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    for the porn board that died years ago

    guy is such a loser that none of the hundreds of pervs on here even want to converse w/ him on the porn board :loldog:
     
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  7. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    Kendall has a boyfriend at school, his name is Israel. The Capital of Israel is Jerusamyfistinhisface
     
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  8. skiedfrillet

    skiedfrillet It's not a lie if you believe it.
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    candid footage of user Celemo tomorrow night

     
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  9. herb.burdette

    herb.burdette Meet me at the corner of 8th and Worthington
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    I figure I need a few years mentally to prepare for boys with cars.
     
  10. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    I'm gonna laugh so hard when some dude shows up in a van to take your daughter out
     
  11. herb.burdette

    herb.burdette Meet me at the corner of 8th and Worthington
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    There are so many dumb things I did between 16-22, God help me if 1/10 of them come back to me.
     
  12. Futureman

    Futureman Check you later kemosabe
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    Had a girl 6 months ago. Rooting super hard she ends up a lesbian. Teaching her about Eleanor Roosevelt, softball, Subarus and Melissa Etheridge.
     
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  13. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    She's def gonna join a sorority
     
  14. Dutch

    Dutch Make it easy on yourself Dutch

    Haha, I'd do the same, but they are clearly advanced. My son caught my daughter, who is 4yo, clearly lying her ass off, with visual tells, but she adjusted fire like it was the 68 Tet Offensive to get out of trouble and keep that $2 toy.
     
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  15. Martian00

    Martian00 New Member

    Yeah but they can only get pregnant every year or so, a son can get God knows how many pregnant in no time. Either way, It's a lose lose situation lol
     
  16. TheSkeeter

    TheSkeeter Well-Known Member
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    I’m now the newest member of this thread. It’s insanely terrifying and awesome all at once
     
  17. dome foam

    dome foam ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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    i went to make a hot lesbian joke and googled some pics and got distracted. so there's that.
     
  18. Bruce Wayne

    Bruce Wayne Billionaire Playboy
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    Hi, yes, I have a 1 month old daughter. Pls help TIA
     
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  19. Tiffin

    Tiffin ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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    Buy a gun.
     
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  20. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    Kendall Age 11 update: she’s a bitch
     
  21. Fusiontegra

    Fusiontegra My life is dope and I do dope shit.#SparedByThanos
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    My 4 yo boy is a complete asshole. If the idea that you pay it forward with boys, I've got the next Tebow in my house. (minus the gay, maybe...and the football)
     
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  22. Baron

    Baron Well-Known Member
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    Girls age 10 and 2, both bitches at varying levels.
     
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  23. OZ

    OZ Old balls

    Lol...

    My brother has 2 girls (and luckily a 2 year old boy as well).

    The last time I visited them the now 6 year old told me about her 3 boyfriends at school. I was terrified for my brother at the level of knowledge she has compared to me....when I was like 13. The internet man...they learn too much, too fast.
     
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  24. blind dog

    blind dog wps
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    My daughter is 7 and might be the only family member that likes me
     
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  25. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    THEHEBREW1 :warn: :warn: :warn:
     
  26. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    Weird bump.
     
  27. OhioHoo

    OhioHoo Other than that Mrs. Lincoln, how was the play?
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    Will be joining this club in March.
     
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  28. Chipper>Jeter

    Chipper>Jeter Defund the NCAA
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    My daughter's homecoming date for this weekend is now her boyfriend :tebow:. Fortunately he was at my house when the Falcons lost the Super Bowl so he got to see the drunken meltdown that ensued. He thinks I'm completely unhinged and I'd like to keep it that way.
     
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  29. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    thats the dad i aspire to be some day
     
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  30. Lefthook

    Lefthook token Oregon State fan
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    my daughter is age 9, is this my future?
     
  31. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    Yes
     
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  32. Russellin4885

    Russellin4885 Well-Known Member
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    Joined this club last week and these are my exact sentiments.
     
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  33. dump

    dump TMB’s premier expert on women’s CBB
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  34. Pile Driving Miss Daisy

    Pile Driving Miss Daisy It angries up the blood
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    Celemo I assume Kendall is no longer doing NBA fan art?
     
  35. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    For the time being, no. She’s currently focusing on a collab project with Meatball...They’re creating a comic book.
     
  36. dblplay1212

    dblplay1212 Well-Known Member
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  37. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    Kendall went to her first "dance" last Friday. Was an afterschool dance/party that ended @ 4pm. She did ask Israel to the dance beforehand, he accepted. She dressed to the nines that day, he showed up in a t-shirt & sweatpants, she was pissed...I'm beginning to like this fucking guy
     
  38. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    Kendall turns 13 on Tuesday, tonight was her 1st co-ed bday party. Mrs. Celemo and I can sleep soundly because the boys she hangs with are harmless geeks. Bullet Dodged...for now
     
  39. VaxRule

    VaxRule Mmm ... Coconuts
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    Geeks are the new jocks. Fortnite and chill is the new Netflix and chill
     
  40. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    These kids made Tobias & devine look like Rico Suaves...I’m not worried
     
  41. Joe_Pesci

    Joe_Pesci lying dog-faced pony soldier
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    Wolfsburg

    Sounds like she's going to be swooning over their clever cultural references in no time
     
  42. Jim Brockmire

    Jim Brockmire I think you're wildly underestimating heroin.
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    I was a total geek (still am) and had my first lay at 14. Which terrifies me because I also have a 13 year old girl.

    Its always the ones you least expect.
     
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  43. AIP

    AIP Team bush
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    My son just went to one, it was so odd sounding to me since when I was his age all I wanted to do was get laid and smoke pot

    But these kids played games and he took his guitar and they sat around singing and stuff
     
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  44. Daddy Rabbit

    Daddy Rabbit obviously silly and not productive
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    I said maybe
     
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  45. backinblack23

    backinblack23 Bang Biscut
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    Sounds like he's starting a cult.
     
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  46. Jim Brockmire

    Jim Brockmire I think you're wildly underestimating heroin.
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    Kid will slay. Bitches love guitars.
     
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  47. BudKilmer

    BudKilmer Well-Known Member
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    5 year old daughter had a boy following her around the playground. 8 year old daughter went up to said boy and said “be careful talking to her, my dad will punch your dad.” Kid started crying.

    :ahh:
     
  48. Matt Foley

    Matt Foley RIP EARL
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    Older daughter should have at least given him directions to the nearest Publix.
     
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  49. CloudBerry

    CloudBerry Well-Known Member
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    you're gonna be the one that saaaaaves meee,

    and after allllll...
     
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  50. dblplay1212

    dblplay1212 Well-Known Member
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    I was away from my daughter for the first time for more than a night this past week. I was busy all week so its not like I was sitting in my room crying about it. But last night they picked me up at the airport way past her bedtime. She was asleep but heard my voice when I got in the car. She woke up and started saying daddy over and over. Got out and walked to her door and she was just cheese smiling. One of the better experiences of my life.
     
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