Nextdoor.com...Scout is born

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by lechnerd, Aug 31, 2016.

  1. chet fire

    chet fire Man in Members Only jacket

    I started bagging when I started practicing chip shots in the backyard. I don't do that so much anymore, but I've gotten used to not having to deal with the molehill rows of clippings if I want to set up a net or walk across the yard.

    No shame on those that don't. There's a reason living in a POA would drive me bonkers
     
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  2. Baron

    Baron Well-Known Member
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    If you have a lawn with molehill rows of clippings I’m going to shame you all day. You’re either cutting your grass way too short or you’re waiting too long between mowings.
     
  3. Doc Louis

    Doc Louis Well-Known Member
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    Anyone else having fun reading Luddite posts about 5g network antenna installation? It's the new nimby with a touch of anti vax idiocy.
     
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  4. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
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    Anyone else having fun reading Luddite posts about 5g network antenna installation? It's the new nimby with a touch of anti vax idiocy.
     
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  5. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    Interesting choice of picture to advertise house cleaning

    [​IMG]
     
  6. $P1

    $P1 Ball State #1
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    Wasn't sure where to put this, so I chose this thread

    upload_2019-3-26_15-24-10.png
     
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  7. TC

    TC Peter, 53, from Toxteth
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    Hey Jodicee, I've got an odd task for you :gfa:

    Just couldn't get to it myself :gfa:
     
  8. lechnerd

    lechnerd They say Monaco is a sunny place for shady people
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    Holy fuck balls I have a good one, give me a sec to get the screenshots posted.

    Dad posted he saw two people having sex in their car. Thread went as expected. I’m crying over here.
     
  9. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    I feel like this isnt gunna get posted for days
     
  10. lechnerd

    lechnerd They say Monaco is a sunny place for shady people
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    [​IMG]

    So a bunch of outrage was followed by Joyce who turned it up a notch...

    [​IMG]

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  11. TC

    TC Peter, 53, from Toxteth
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    "He is tall and muscular wearing a ball cap."

    This guy could write for romance novels
     
  12. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    I like ol shane
     
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  13. HatterasJack

    HatterasJack Is your refrigerator running? It's Mike Hunt.
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    Kayla Lechner(d), huh?
     
  14. TC

    TC Peter, 53, from Toxteth
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    I'm thinking Lechnerd must be Daniel. Look at the reaction he gets out of Sherrie
     
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  15. Lawnole23

    Lawnole23 FSU Seminoles 2020 National Champions
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    There is a thread in my neighborhood about a stray cat stuck up in a tree in a marsh. It's a stray no one owns this cat. The tree is surrounded by water largely so no one is sure how the cat got there outside of of a small strip of land that is so covered in vegetation you need a machete to get to. Can't get there by boat because no river access. No kayak or canoe works because fallen trees all around it. One guy goes in duck boots and is surrounded by water moccasins and gets to the tree but the cat just goes higher. They find a small strip of land and put a cage out with cat food and leave but the cat refuses to come down because it's dumb.

    Current options being discussed are to go back into the poisonous snake infested waters with a brave child or small woman who can climb the smaller branches and brave falling into the water or being ripped up by the cat when they get to it. This is being vetoed. New option is to build a 50 foot floating platform next to the tree that the cat can walk across. This has to be approved by the park and they'be said no because it would involve permanently altering part of the marsh, which they are not allowing. The lady that's going to build it has been told to do it anyways. The cat that won't come down for cat food is supposedly going to see the platform and bound down the tree and across where a nightly patrol will be waiting to capture it and make sure it spayed/neutered.

    I'll keep updates coming.
     
  16. TC

    TC Peter, 53, from Toxteth
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    White people would have already saved it if it was a dog
     
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  17. Lawnole23

    Lawnole23 FSU Seminoles 2020 National Champions
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    Older white women though will do anything for cats.
     
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  18. lechnerd

    lechnerd They say Monaco is a sunny place for shady people
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    :roll:
     
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  19. Lawnole23

    Lawnole23 FSU Seminoles 2020 National Champions
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    No real updates but everyone who has attempted to get the cat is being told they’re a “hero” by the cat ladies and on par with Medal of Honor nominees.

    Nm new updates below.
     
    #1319 Lawnole23, Apr 6, 2019
    Last edited: Apr 6, 2019
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  20. Lawnole23

    Lawnole23 FSU Seminoles 2020 National Champions
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    Things are getting desperate it appears. Gerry providing updates:

    TIME IS IOF THE ESSENCE.....HEROIC MEASURE NECRSSARY NOW ....OTHERWISE CAT WILL EXPIRE. OR. WORSE

    RANGER STATION SHOULD BE. CALLED AGAIN INSIST SPEAK TO”IN CHARGE” PERSON...


    Rox, roger That. Cats very reluctant to enter trap ! Very. We’ve “captured” and have in house nine; every one capture DIFFERENT ; need to consider and employ whatever means necessary ( non

    Harmful! ) to capture; patience, persistence, etc , but they will not allowed themselves to be captured voluntarily.. unfortunately..BEST LUCK,..

    Gerry

    I’m not precisely sure what’s worse than the cat dying but maybe it will be taken over by a swamp demon that will reduce the town to ashes.

    Someone else pointed out that the cat is not emaciated and is obviously still eating somehow so maybe we should leave it alone and it will come down when it’s ready. He was told to get the fuck out and did not understand the situation.
     
  21. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
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    I’m about to drive over and get the damn cat out myself.
     
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  22. Lawnole23

    Lawnole23 FSU Seminoles 2020 National Champions
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    I’m trying to get them to start a go fund me for the cat.
     
  23. nolecpa

    nolecpa Well-Known Member
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    Make sure to post the link here if you do. I’m sure TMB will be very “generous” to the cause.
     
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  24. Lawnole23

    Lawnole23 FSU Seminoles 2020 National Champions
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    Cat update:

    The cat wasn’t seen for a week straight. Lots of thoughts and prayers for the cat. Obviously dead because it couldn’t be saved. Turns out the cat came down some time ago and was just hanging out somewhere else.
     
  25. TC

    TC Peter, 53, from Toxteth
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    Dead....OR. WORSE???
     
  26. nolecpa

    nolecpa Well-Known Member
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    Oh shit, zombie cat is about to take over your neighborhood. Flee while you can.
     
  27. Lawnole23

    Lawnole23 FSU Seminoles 2020 National Champions
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    Worse. No one got to be a "hero."
     
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  28. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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  29. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    I was really hoping somebody would drop a "Congrats on the sex!"
     
  30. TC

    TC Peter, 53, from Toxteth
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    Jesus. I don't want this to be real because I'm just cringing. When it got to the specific meal recipes??
     
  31. lechnerd

    lechnerd They say Monaco is a sunny place for shady people
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    Man that is Amazing.

    This is the kind of stuff I want to come up with when I start trolling on Nextdoor.

    I may have to rethink everything though. Originally my profile was going to be a 92 year old woman named Eunice.

    But this thread has opened my eyes, perhaps 28 year old male named Trevor would be a better option. I’m thinking infinitely more possibilities.

    I think I need to get this going before the 2020 elections. Trevor sounds like he would make a good Beto supporter who eats a gluten-free diet even though he doesn’t have to. I’m sure I could spark a few conversations going that route.
     
  32. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    And passive-aggressively volunteer to help people do shit they don't want to do, like recycling and composting.
     
  33. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    And it doesn't need to be Trevor. It needs to be something funnier that, on its own, will get under people's skin like "Skip" or "Scout" or "Ranger."
     
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  34. lechnerd

    lechnerd They say Monaco is a sunny place for shady people
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    :roll:
     
  35. lechnerd

    lechnerd They say Monaco is a sunny place for shady people
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    Ok these are topic ideas I have, feel free to add any...

    [​IMG]
     
  36. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    All strong suggestions. I think you periodically also need to claim to have spotted some rare animal and indignantly refuse to admit that it could have been anything else. Something like this:

    Then, every few weeks, post another sighting of the ocelot. Eventually, it will be clear that you're the only one seeing it.
     
  37. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    And :respek: on the Tulanian drop.
     
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  38. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    And, with the composting, you should suggest that people bring out their compost cans after the actual trash pick up so that you can come around and pick it up and fight tooth and nail with anyone who claims that you didn't pick theirs up. Insist that you did look at it, but they had noncompostable matter in the can so you couldn't take it.
     
  39. TC

    TC Peter, 53, from Toxteth
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    I feel like I’m in the writers room at a great tv show
     
  40. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
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    He is even trolling while planning a troll.
     
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  41. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
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    Maybe make a suggestion that a certain house gets rezoned for commercial and residential in effort to open a CBD oil shop.
     
  42. lechnerd

    lechnerd They say Monaco is a sunny place for shady people
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    Fucking ocelot man :roll:
     
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  43. milquetoast

    milquetoast Firm Security
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    This might be THE most factual statement in TMB history.
     
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  44. TC

    TC Peter, 53, from Toxteth
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    Make it like this. “Tell me about your dream mosque.”
     
  45. TC

    TC Peter, 53, from Toxteth
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    “Ok this is option 1.”
    [loud grumbling]
    “Ok we will go with option 2.”
     
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  46. lechnerd

    lechnerd They say Monaco is a sunny place for shady people
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    Perfect. Reminds me of this thread.

     
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  47. THF

    THF BITE THE NUTS, THUMB IN THE ASS!
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    In San Antonio Texas?

    This is going to go quite well.

    I think your first step is going to be to outlaw outdoor grilling. Think of all the smoke and heat that generates and the contributions to global warming!

    I am sure people in your neighborhood would love to discuss the options for low income housing near the neighborhood?

    I think this has a ton of potential.
     
  48. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    The grilling/global warming thing should come in as an added benefit to buying the cooked HEB brisket. This is a long con, so he needs some subtlety.
     
  49. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    Austin city council actually considered this exact thing and spent a bunch of money on researching it and possibly requiring a filter system on smoker/grills
     
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  50. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    Honestly the Austin city council meeting minutes would provide endless content ideas for this troll
     
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