Vasectomy Thread

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by CUAngler, Feb 24, 2021.

  1. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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    Well? I could use some clinical grade shit
     
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  2. DUCKMOUTH

    DUCKMOUTH People don’t you know, don’t you know
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    Thought it was easy and really nothing. Took like two minutes and pretty painless. I get wanting to go under due to anxiety, but really no need to.
     
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  3. lazy bum

    lazy bum active consumer
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    They gave me the option of a Valium to take beforehand. I said yes and thank you. Hopefully it makes the actual procedure easy. It’s the recovery I’m worried about.
     
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  4. kinghill

    kinghill Cool American Flavour
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    We’ve read a variety of different accounts in this thread, not all as painless as yours.
     
  5. kinghill

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    SCROTAL. SUPPORT.
     
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  6. TableKnight

    TableKnight Go Knights
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    It was such a strange experience for me... My balls just hanging out on a sheet of paper and having casual conversation with the doc while he cuts my sack.
    Didn't feel like anything. When they cauterized the vas it was a strange experience to see and smell nut smoke.

    Super painless though. Recovery wasn't even that bad for me. But I milked it so my wife could understand the gravity of the sacrifice
     
  7. lazy bum

    lazy bum active consumer
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    So, uh, we canceled my appointment yesterday.

    We slipped up :facepalm: Positive test yesterday morning.

    So now I’ll wait until we get to 20 weeks or so and do it then. We’re happy but this is definitely it. If something happens with this pregnancy we wanted the option to try again if we decided to since we’re going all in on welcoming a third kid to the brood.
     
  8. Clemson327

    Clemson327 Well-Known Member
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    This is why I had mine done within six weeks of our second one popping out (that and my insurance plan year ending). Since we hit the max-out-of pocket due to a C-section, I at least didn’t have to pay for anyone (in the moment) to cut into my scrotum.

    My doc liked listening to Cream and making small talk while operating, but he was not near liberal enough with the local anesthetic. I jumped at the first couple of scalpel cuts. The stitches were the biggest pain during recovery for me since they kept poking me in the leg, but I was able to walk gingerly and climb the bleachers at a basketball game the next day.
     
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  9. kinghill

    kinghill Cool American Flavour
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    LMAO
     
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  10. Funshot Residue

    Funshot Residue Mammoth Stabber
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    Liked for "we slipped up".
    Congrats man.
     
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  11. Boo MFer!

    Boo MFer! No longer a cog in some powerhouse machine
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    Congrats on the sex!
     
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  12. TableKnight

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    Congrats! Moving from man to zone defense parenting. It simultaneously great and terrible
     
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  13. —

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    So slit my dick in front of my eyes, cuz my nuts are in OOOOHIIIOOOO (irrelevant, they may as well not exist).
     
  14. Boo MFer!

    Boo MFer! No longer a cog in some powerhouse machine
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    Jesus, is this a Hawthorne Heights reference?
     
  15. kinghill

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    Total cost appears like it will end up being $2170. Not bad and pretty close to the estimated $2300 they told me. Hopefully that includes all the claims and I don't see anything come in late.
     
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  16. kinghill

    kinghill Cool American Flavour
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    Also, 5 down, 15 to go. :jizz: :quagmire:

    thanks
     
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  17. Fusiontegra

    Fusiontegra My life is dope and I do dope shit.#SparedByThanos
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    Scheduled for mid-August.
     
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  18. Boo MFer!

    Boo MFer! No longer a cog in some powerhouse machine
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    Quitter!
     
  19. Fusiontegra

    Fusiontegra My life is dope and I do dope shit.#SparedByThanos
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    The wife and I were one-and-doners years ago - she also had a surgery that made anything else impossible - but I'm also in the middle of a separation and I sure as fuck don't plan on having any random kids in the future.
     
  20. Boo MFer!

    Boo MFer! No longer a cog in some powerhouse machine
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    Well, shit. Sorry.
     
  21. Fusiontegra

    Fusiontegra My life is dope and I do dope shit.#SparedByThanos
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    Yeah, got a little heavy there after what I know was a joke. My bad.
     
  22. Boo MFer!

    Boo MFer! No longer a cog in some powerhouse machine
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    Congrats on the future sex?
     
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  23. kinghill

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    What would our world look like right now if there were no random kids

    *kinghill slowly vanishes*
     
  24. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    If you’re lucky like my parents it’ll be twins.
     
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  25. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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    Initial consultation set

    [​IMG]
     
  26. AptosDuck

    AptosDuck Pedantic Hausfrau
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    Had it done 15 years ago today yeay me
     
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  27. kinghill

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    happy anniversary to your balls
     
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  28. Fusiontegra

    Fusiontegra My life is dope and I do dope shit.#SparedByThanos
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    Officially joined the club today. Currently typing this with ice on my balls(gauze).

    Initial local anesthesia was the worst but being numb down there while they were tugging shit around was weird. Took about 20 minutes.
     
  29. IV

    IV Freedom is the right of all sentient beings
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    Would this be the worst time to get covid? I think so
     
  30. CUAngler

    CUAngler Royale with Cheese
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    I had to go crank one out yesterday afternoon in a fertility clinic for my post op semen analysis. It was way more uncomfortable and awkward than I was already expecting.

    Got put in a well let masterbatorium with instructions on how to use the internet tv and google. Black love seat with a giant napkin thing to spread out on. It was awful.
     
  31. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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    11 days until my consult for the no-scalpel procedure. Told my wife last night that the face or the butt are the only options going forward because I have olympic level swimmers
     
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  32. Fusiontegra

    Fusiontegra My life is dope and I do dope shit.#SparedByThanos
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    Mine sent me home with a cup that I’m allowed to fill at home and then bring back within an hour.

    “you can keep it body temperature by keeping it in a coat pocket”

    Totally not creepy. Joke’s on them, I’m going to fill it in the parking lot.
     
  33. AptosDuck

    AptosDuck Pedantic Hausfrau
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    [​IMG]
     
  34. Fusiontegra

    Fusiontegra My life is dope and I do dope shit.#SparedByThanos
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    my consult was Wednesday, procedure today.

    The chance for one slipping through after the procedure(and you’re proven sterile) is a lot less now. They fold one of the tubes on each side back toward itself before cauterizing so even if a swimmer snuck through years down the road, it wouldn’t even be pointed toward the right place.
     
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  35. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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    Is that for the no scalpel, scalpel, or both?
     
  36. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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    My primary care dr told me he brought his specimen in a baby food jar. In retrospect, kind of a weird thing to volunteer
     
  37. Fusiontegra

    Fusiontegra My life is dope and I do dope shit.#SparedByThanos
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    mine was no scalpel. I’d imagine that part is pretty standard now.
     
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  38. Han Solo

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    Got mine done a couple years ago. Had a great conversation during the procedure with the Dr’s assistant who’s son apparently went to the middle school I taught at (not in any of my classes though). Very awkward how nonchalant she was talking about her son and his classes/teachers/friends while touching my penis.

    i milked the shit out of the recovery after hearing some grapefruit-sized horror stories from guys I coached with. My wife’s parents came in for the week to help wife with kids so she could wait on me. Laid in bed for 7 days watching like every 30 for 30 that’s ever been made. Days 1 and 2 were pretty uncomfortable, but it felt way better after that.

    Best advice I would give is to follow doctor recommendations no matter how good you feel. Also, jock straps and bags of frozen peas are the best.
     
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  39. Pokes

    Pokes Younger, hipper, cooler
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    Looking at scheduling a consult soon. I’m way more worried about this than I probably should be :ohdear:
     
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  40. LuPoor

    LuPoor Cuddle with the homies watching Stand By Me
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    Yeah it's a big nothing. Certainly simpler than your wife getting fixed
     
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  41. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    Wife?
     
  42. IV

    IV Freedom is the right of all sentient beings
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    speak for yourself pal!
     
  43. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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    In the waiting room for my consult.

    A female coworker of mine is also here for some reason :warn:
     
    #243 ned's head, Aug 31, 2021
    Last edited: Aug 31, 2021
  44. (Z)

    (Z) Well-Known Member
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    You laid on the couch and made your wife wait on you for a week? Jeez.
     
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  45. Hatfield

    Hatfield Charlie don’t surf
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    Would be hilarious if you could see what other ppl had searched for
     
  46. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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    What do we think boys

     
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  47. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    What's a procedure cost these days? Wish insurance looked at it as preventative care b/c I know they don't want another kid on my plan.

    Survived another month w/out getting popped with the horrific news of baby +2 is comin. Feel like I'm laying with fire every day
     
  48. Fusiontegra

    Fusiontegra My life is dope and I do dope shit.#SparedByThanos
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    Still waiting on the bill for mine. Was estimated to be between 700 and 1100, depending on how much insurance decided to cover.

    Am just under 2 weeks removed from the procedure. Waited a full week on returning to the gym and had minimal soreness the next day. I probably over-did it the first time, too. Have been multiple times since and feel pretty good during and after, even this point.
     
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  49. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    That's not too bad.

    I just need my wife to get out of her waffling state. Earlier this week "I'm done with kids". Last night after drinking "Are you sure you don't want a 2nd kid". That's a hard no from me, dawg.
     
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  50. Fusiontegra

    Fusiontegra My life is dope and I do dope shit.#SparedByThanos
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    Schedule that shit the next time only kid is sick and don’t look back.
     
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