My younger son had pink eye last week. Now I have pink eye. Wife: I’m horny and want some adult time after the kids go to bed. Me: Ok Wife: But you need to hit it from behind because I don’t want to look at your goopy eye. Me: Did you just say “hit it from behind”? Wife: What’s wrong with that? Me: Nothing. I just wasn’t expecting Left Eye in the bedroom. Wife: The pink eye is in your right eye. Doesn’t matter. 10% chance I still have sex.
It’s 9pm, we have two kids, and my wife worked the last two days. The 10% chance is normal odds of nighttime sex in my house. Has nothing to do with the conversation.
Does she normally talk like that to you and fail to step up to the plate? If not, odds were much better than 10%,
She's been dealing with a few things physically so she went to a chiropractor. Yesterday he decided to crack her ears. "My ears feel so much better after he did that Feng Shui on my ears"
I had to use my lawnmower gas last week to put some in her van because she was so low she couldn’t make it to the gas station from our house.
Have you guys explained the effects on the motor and gas pump when you run on low levels of gas all the time?
So the alarm that constantly yells at them that they have 0 miles to empty doesn't work, but this will?
Lol christ I'm still trying to get through that she should lock her car, or at the very least, not leave her keys in the car when parked on the street in our inner ring suburb with a significant uptick in vehicle theft I treat my lawn mowing shoes better than she can be troubled to treat her car
Every since I told my wife to stop putting so many clothes in the front-loading washing machine because that design can not accommodate as large as loads as a top loading she has started putting even more in it. I have told her the downsides of running gas tanks too empty and now she runs the tank even further down it appears. Some women do not like to be “told what to do,” no matter how valid the reason.
My wife is a gas Nazi. She's on edge about trying to get the car filled when we hit half a tank. I'm the one that will pull into a gas station with the gas light on.
On the topic of low gas, I left work one day and was on the phone with my wife. She stopped at a Sam’s Club to get gas on the way to pick up our son from daycare. I drive home (15-20 minutes), sit down and fall asleep. After 10 or 15 minutes, she calls back and asks me to get up and go get our son bc she is still waiting to get gas. Evidently here was a issue with one pump and everyone had to move over to the only other one. I said “go somewhere else?” And the response was “I’m so low I may actually run out while I sit here and wait”. I told her that she could blow her engine up and doing that and it hasn’t happened since.
Oh I like that. Hadn't thought of using unsubstantiated fear tactics. Hun if you run your tank on low so often our kids are gonna have depression. I know where to hit.
tie in the engine blowing up with how that will effect her ability to buy other shit. “We won’t be able to paint that room or put up a fence or buy another 50 random items from Amazon, etc. if you blow up your car.” Also, she and your child might end up stranded on the side of the highway. Every worst case scenario. Fear is a great motivator.
My wife is the opposite with gas. She'll call me in the morning and say, "My car says I have 50 miles til empty. Am I going to make it to work?" Her drive to work is about 10 miles.
mine as well. If it gets close to 1/4 a tank she thinks she's going to be stranded on the side of the road
Wife was off today and went to the store and was going to make pasta for dinner. Guess who got half way done making meatballs and realized we had no pasta sauce… luckily we had leftover grape tomatoes so I was able to make a sauce but man thought i was getting out of cooking tonight for a change
sorry guys but there is nothing more exhilarating than being 10 miles from the nearest gas station and having your gas gauge read well below e it’s a great high and breaks up the monotony of long car rides
Mine fills up her tank like an adult but she has been pulled over for speeding at least 10 times in the last year. Somehow only 1 ticket though.
Forms of any kind turn her brain into mush. I don't know if it's a strategy to try make me so annoyed I'll break down and finish it for her or what, but it's bewildering. We have to fill out a travel visa for inter-island travel here and there's a section of general questions. I get bombarded shit while I'm filling mine out like "what do I put for our destination" and "what do I put for "are you traveling with children" and I just don't know what to say.