Official Dads of TMB Thread

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by Boo MFer!, Apr 9, 2015.

  1. ButchCassidy

    ButchCassidy Well-Known Member
    Donor
    Ohio State BuckeyesColumbus CrewUnited States Men's National Soccer TeamSneakers

    At our last ultrasound, 7 months. Baby girl is being stubborn and won’t show us her face! She’s against moms side looking toward her back.
     
  2. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
    Donor
    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    reminded me that my wife told me i "held her leg completely wrong" during labor

    well excuuuuuuuse me
     
  3. Dr. Mantis Toboggan

    Dr. Mantis Toboggan Well-Known Member
    Florida State SeminolesBoston Red SoxOrlando MagicNew England PatriotsBoston Bruins

    Awesome man, going for 20-week tomorrow morning.
     
    bigred77 and ButchCassidy like this.
  4. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
    Donor
    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    Wife is due in like five weeks with #2. Hasn’t really set in I’m gonna have another human to care for. She also thinks she’s gonna deliver early and I’m like why don’t you slow your roll there. There’s a possibility that we would have to drive two hours to KC for delivery.
     
    bigred77, THF, a.tramp and 1 other person like this.
  5. Marbles

    Marbles Trudging the road to happy destiny
    Donor
    Auburn TigersAtlanta Braves

    I’d prob have another kid. But my wife is opposed. I love my little girl so much. She’s such a daddies girl and only wants to be help by me. Give me more if that.
     
    bigred77 likes this.
  6. Baron

    Baron Well-Known Member
    Donor
    Cincinnati BearcatsCincinnati RedsCincinnati BengalsTennisTiger WoodsFC Cincinnati

    I'm betting that's a labor & delivery room and not the mom/baby floor room. I've found that the L and D rooms are usually nicer than the mom/baby floor rooms. I hope yours is that nice though! Any other questions, ask away, we have 4.
     
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  7. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
    Donor
    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    carpets in the L&D room? dunno about that.
     
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  8. Baron

    Baron Well-Known Member
    Donor
    Cincinnati BearcatsCincinnati RedsCincinnati BengalsTennisTiger WoodsFC Cincinnati

    Didn’t realize that was carpet. Interesting.
     
    bigred77 likes this.
  9. Sub-Zero

    Sub-Zero ALL THE TOSTITOS!!!
    Donor
    UCF KnightsMiami MarlinsOrlando MagicMiami DolphinsFlorida PanthersWWEOrlando CityTennisSneakersBig 12 Conference

    This is basically our house now.

    Kid threw up (he’s almost 5). Then totally fine and wants to do everything. 24 hours later after everything was fine and he threw up again. Now totally fine again. Bug passed to wife and I just feel like crap but not sure if sick or exhausted. Covid test negative a couple days ago though.
    Fun times
     
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  10. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
    Donor
    Arkansas RazorbacksSt. Louis CardinalsHouston RocketsDallas CowboysSneakers

    Yep. Went through it twice now. Negative on multiple Covid tests when I had it, but it was the second worst sickness I’ve ever had since I had the flu. Only lasted the 24 hours roughly though. Started both times in the evening and lasted all night long but fine the next day.
     
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  11. Dr. Mantis Toboggan

    Dr. Mantis Toboggan Well-Known Member
    Florida State SeminolesBoston Red SoxOrlando MagicNew England PatriotsBoston Bruins

    So he looked like an actual human and not as much of an alien today.
     
    a.tramp and bigred77 like this.
  12. pianoman

    pianoman my drinks are free
    Donor TMB OG
    Michigan WolverinesChicago CubsDetroit Red Wings

    We had this two weeks ago. Two year old threw up in the middle of night. Seemed fine the next 36 hours and then threw up again. Then was fine within a day. Then I got it and felt like absolute crap for 48 hours and then was fine. And then wife caught it. For us, no throwing up but just unbelievably fatigued and felt nauseous the whole time.
     
    Hoss Bonaventure and bigred77 like this.
  13. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
    Donor
    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    Got a face scan of #2 today and she looks a lot like #1 did at that stage. Crazy.
     
    Baron, bigred77, CF3234 and 4 others like this.
  14. CF3234

    CF3234 Fan of: Bandwagons
    Donor TMB OG
    Miami HurricanesMiami MarlinsMiami DolphinsFlorida PanthersTiger WoodsInter Miami CFGame of ThronesMiami Heat

    Kid got his first cold this week. We made it 10 months. He got over it really quick though.
     
  15. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
    Donor
    Arkansas RazorbacksSt. Louis CardinalsHouston RocketsDallas CowboysSneakers

    Both times I had it coming out of both ends and I’m talking every 5-10 mins I was having to make a sprint to the bathroom for one or the other. I felt so terrible because I was massively dehydrated. I couldn’t keep water or pedialyte down so got the dehydrated shakes and aches. Ice chips were the key. I just ate cup after cup of crushed ice all night.
     
    bigred77 likes this.
  16. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
    Donor
    Arkansas RazorbacksSt. Louis CardinalsHouston RocketsDallas CowboysSneakers

    I hope our son takes after my wife’s immune system or whatever it is. She never gets sick and even when she does she has very mild symptoms whereas I’ll have the same thing and get floored by it.
     
  17. PaulKemp

    PaulKemp Well-Known Member
    Donor TMB OG

    Sitting here pacing around kinda feeling like shit in general. Kid is watching watching Blippi. I hear:

    "I'm just sitting here thinking about life. What's the purpose of life?! Hmm. I don't know, let's go have a smoothie!!"

    Kinda nailed it
     
  18. Bruce Bowen

    Bruce Bowen Well-Known Member
    Donor

    #1 was a very difficult baby but amazing kid/toddler.
    #2 has been an angel of a baby so I'm sure he'll be a terror of a toddler.
     
  19. ugafish

    ugafish Not a new member
    Donor
    Georgia BulldogsAtlanta HawksAtlanta FalconsLiverpool

    Sorry, but once your son becomes a man, then he can suffer from the man flu, just like you do.
     
    Hoss Bonaventure likes this.
  20. Stone Cold Steve Austin

    Stone Cold Steve Austin Tickler Extraordinaire
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideAtlanta Braves

    You need help
     
  21. ugafish

    ugafish Not a new member
    Donor
    Georgia BulldogsAtlanta HawksAtlanta FalconsLiverpool

  22. cal

    cal BOATS
    TMB OG
    Texas LonghornsLos Angeles KingsLos Angeles Angels of AnaheimGame of ThronesSneakersWu-tang

    my 8 year old :facepalm:

    [​IMG]

    he spits this much toothpaste out after 30 seconds

    what the hell does he think he’s brushing with afterwards?
     
    Name P. Redacted and a.tramp like this.
  23. WhiskeyDelta

    WhiskeyDelta Well-Known Member
    Donor

    After a cancelled flight, being rerouted, requesting an earlier connection during the reroute, and 20 total hours of travel, 17 of which wearing an N95, I made it to Atlanta in time to get tackle hugged by my kid before she went to bed on Xmas Eve and it was totally worth it.
     
  24. Jack Parkman

    Jack Parkman Endorsed by Fred McGriff
    Staff Donor TMB OG
    Florida GatorsMiami MarlinsMiami DolphinsFlorida PanthersMiami Heat

  25. Dr. Mantis Toboggan

    Dr. Mantis Toboggan Well-Known Member
    Florida State SeminolesBoston Red SoxOrlando MagicNew England PatriotsBoston Bruins

    They have been on fire with the Christmas posts.
     
    Jack Parkman likes this.
  26. Jack Parkman

    Jack Parkman Endorsed by Fred McGriff
    Staff Donor TMB OG
    Florida GatorsMiami MarlinsMiami DolphinsFlorida PanthersMiami Heat

  27. buckwild

    buckwild #BucketsGetsBuckets
    Donor
    Ohio State BuckeyesDetroit LionsDetroit PistonsDetroit Red Wings

    This is a PSA....if your wife ever wants to buy a product from Kid Kraft... pay for it to be assembled before delivery. She ordered a fucking kitchen for our daughter and I went to put it in togethwr last night and it took roughly 4.5 hours...there were at least 200 screws and shit that needed to be put in and the directions were complete dog shit. I've got a buddy that had to put a doll house together from them last night and it took him almost 4 hours. After hour 2 my wife told me there was an option to pay an extra fee for it to be assembled before delivery and I almost murdered her before Santa came down the chimney. She's like "I just looked at the reviews and multiple people say that putting this together almost ended their marriage".
     
  28. Han Solo

    Donor
    Michigan WolverinesOregon DucksSeattle MarinersPittsburgh SteelersAvengers

    My wife is obsessed with Kid Kraft. So dumb.
     
    Bruce Bowen, buckwild and bigred77 like this.
  29. Pile Driving Miss Daisy

    Pile Driving Miss Daisy It angries up the blood
    Donor
    Texas LonghornsAtlanta BravesAtlanta HawksAtlanta FalconsAtlanta UnitedGeorgia Southern Eagles

    It is absolutely fucking incredible how much a four and a half year old girl can talk. I'm very close to losing my grip on reality. My wife's mother has Alzheimer's and basically can't communicate anymore so my wife is with her a lot and I'm a single dad for long stretches of the day, I'm about to lose it.
     
  30. buckwild

    buckwild #BucketsGetsBuckets
    Donor
    Ohio State BuckeyesDetroit LionsDetroit PistonsDetroit Red Wings

    You should have your own YouTube show or some shit if you're used to putting those together.

    When I realized what I was in for last night I thought finding a YouTube assembly video may help. There was exactly one....and it was 2 hours and 34 minutes long. People can't even make YouTube videos for that shit short enough to get clicks.
     
    Han Solo likes this.
  31. pianoman

    pianoman my drinks are free
    Donor TMB OG
    Michigan WolverinesChicago CubsDetroit Red Wings

    I put one of these together this morning. Took like an hour. You must’ve got stuck with some deluxe sized one.
     
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  32. buckwild

    buckwild #BucketsGetsBuckets
    Donor
    Ohio State BuckeyesDetroit LionsDetroit PistonsDetroit Red Wings

    I guess...my wife made a comment on Facebook and showed me like a dozen replies of people bitching about the same thing.
     
  33. pianoman

    pianoman my drinks are free
    Donor TMB OG
    Michigan WolverinesChicago CubsDetroit Red Wings

    buckwild likes this.
  34. BuckeyeRiot

    BuckeyeRiot Team Nicki
    Donor
    Ohio State BuckeyesBoston Red SoxPhiladelphia EaglesKent State Golden FlashesCleveland Cavaliers

    My wife got my son an og metal slinky. He ignored it for the entire day until right before bed. He kinked the fuck out of it in about 42 seconds. She’s been trying to fix it for 45 minutes all while he’s up way past his bedtime. Evil genius.
     
  35. buckwild

    buckwild #BucketsGetsBuckets
    Donor
    Ohio State BuckeyesDetroit LionsDetroit PistonsDetroit Red Wings

    THF likes this.
  36. Bruce Bowen

    Bruce Bowen Well-Known Member
    Donor

    Prob late to this but this song hits wayyyyy too fucking hard. I was hype as hell going to xmas eve yesterday
     
  37. Bankz

    Bankz Well-Known Member
    Donor TMB OG
    MilanFormula 1

    Kid Kraft Disney Princess house for me to assemble... a little over two hours to complete.
     
    buckwild, JC, bigred77 and 1 other person like this.
  38. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
    Donor
    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    A tragic comedy in three parts

    Toddler says she doesn’t need to pee before bath time.

    Toddler stands up during bath and pees herself because she couldn’t hold it to make it to the toilet.

    Toddler cries her every loving eyes out because I drain the tub so she isn’t bathing in piss water
     
  39. zeberdee

    zeberdee wheel snipe celly boys
    Donor TMB OG
    Penn State Nittany LionsPhiladelphia PhilliesPhiladelphia 76'ersPhiladelphia EaglesPhiladelphia FlyersArsenalPhiladelphia UnionUnited States Men's National Soccer Team

    just be thankful it was pee and not the other thing.
     
  40. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
    Donor
    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    True. I have had my fair share of bathtub turds to clean up.
     
  41. Pile Driving Miss Daisy

    Pile Driving Miss Daisy It angries up the blood
    Donor
    Texas LonghornsAtlanta BravesAtlanta HawksAtlanta FalconsAtlanta UnitedGeorgia Southern Eagles

    Only happened two or three times, but jesus lord that may have been my least favorite parenting moment.
     
  42. a.tramp

    a.tramp Insubordinate and churlish
    Donor
    Kansas State WildcatsTexas Rangers

    It’s like Lucille Ball stomping grapes. No more no less
     
    Snakes likes this.
  43. The Blackfish

    The Blackfish The Fish in Black
    Staff Donor TMB OG
    Alabama Crimson TideIndianapolis ColtsBook Club

    My son only pooped in the toilet once or twice. My daughter went through a serial bath pooper phase and it was shitty.
     
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  44. infected donkey

    infected donkey Arkansas Razorbacks
    Donor
    Arkansas RazorbacksChicago CubsAvengersBarAndGrillSoutheastern Conference

    Random question but what have y’all done to get the baby to drink the frozen milk supply? Wife’s basically dried up so we can’t mix fresh with old. I’m thinking it may just be this batch we’re pulling from right now but not certain yet. He’s only eating half what he normally does but it’s not that big an issue as we’re feeding him food too.
     
  45. zeberdee

    zeberdee wheel snipe celly boys
    Donor TMB OG
    Penn State Nittany LionsPhiladelphia PhilliesPhiladelphia 76'ersPhiladelphia EaglesPhiladelphia FlyersArsenalPhiladelphia UnionUnited States Men's National Soccer Team

    have you tried mixing with formula?
     
  46. infected donkey

    infected donkey Arkansas Razorbacks
    Donor
    Arkansas RazorbacksChicago CubsAvengersBarAndGrillSoutheastern Conference

    Not yet. Was going to try on next bottle in a couple hours.
     
  47. a.tramp

    a.tramp Insubordinate and churlish
    Donor
    Kansas State WildcatsTexas Rangers

    It is officially official, I have a freak of nature on my hands. 3’ tall at 1.5 year check-up.

    When should I expect colleges to start offering scholarships in all sports?

    1B88DCAE-D988-4FF0-B545-3D4911B27C8E.jpeg
     
    Bo Pelinis, buckwild, THF and 2 others like this.
  48. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
    Donor
    Texas Tech Red RaidersTexas RangersSan Antonio SpursDallas CowboysKansas City ChiefsAustin FCTexas Tech Red Raiders alt

    19.29" head?
    Holy shit
     
  49. Bruce Bowen

    Bruce Bowen Well-Known Member
    Donor

    My youngest is on the smaller end but he's cute as shit so I won't secretly feed him HGH just yet
    upload_2021-12-30_12-37-2.png