Stupid shit your wife/girlfriend does...

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by bertwing, May 16, 2016.

  1. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Please don't provide any additional ideas of shittalking for MLS
     
  2. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    The cow pastures enhances the vibe of being a village....the loveliest village. We don't want to be a city, dirty lib
     
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  3. El Tiburon

    El Tiburon Well-Known Member
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    Special fucking place.
     
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  4. One Two

    One Two Hot Dog Vibes
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    Nice try Wesley!

    A0CA6F8C-C6E9-474A-9BD5-49E94EC52E38.png
     
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  5. HuskerInMiami

    HuskerInMiami Well-Known Member
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    My wife and all the girls in my family went on a 3 night cruise two weekends ago. When she came back, she had 14(!!!) packages.... I left them all by the entryway and everyone on the cruise came to our house after the cruise/before flying out and they all were like ,"WTF, why are there so many boxes". Since then I think we've only received 2 packages.
     
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  6. HuskerInMiami

    HuskerInMiami Well-Known Member
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    My mom bought tickets for her and I to go to the Cowboys vs Chiefs when I was a kid. We drove to KC and realized the game was in Dallas.
     
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  7. One Two

    One Two Hot Dog Vibes
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    This is premium content
     
  8. CF3234

    CF3234 Fan of: Bandwagons
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    My now wife once booked me a trip to meet her and her family out in northern iceland. Whole trip was 3 flights.

    Flight 1: Miami-Boston
    Flight 2: Boston-Iceland
    Flight 3: Southern Iceland-Northern Iceland.

    One small problem. The flight to northern iceland was at a completely different airport over an hour away when I had a total layover of about 2 hours. That was quite the stressful 2 hours and an expensive as shit taxi ride.
     
  9. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    How much time were you actually able to spend there? Removing all forms of transit and hotel checkin amount of time.

    That sounds like a whirlwind.
     
  10. CF3234

    CF3234 Fan of: Bandwagons
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    We spent a week in iceland. It was awesome. Love that country. They continued on to Europe, but I had to go back home, was new to my job at that point and couldn't afford to take 2+ weeks off of work.
     
  11. LetItSoak

    LetItSoak Well-Known Member
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    A few years ago my wife's friend bought her husband tickets to the Bucs/Falcons game for his birthday (they're falcons fans) along with flights and a hotel. They get to the airport and run into our good friend who is from Tampa and going home to see family for the weekend. They told him about their trip and he starts cracking up because it was a Falcons home game. They ended up watching it at a bar in Tampa
     
    #17361 LetItSoak, Mar 14, 2023
    Last edited: Mar 14, 2023
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  12. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Fully falling on my sword here that I misread it somehow and thought you said this trip had to be accomplished in 3 days and was just thinking of how much of a shitshow that would be as a gift.
     
  13. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    I know a girl who pisses the bed, but only when she drinks alcohol.

    So…every day.
     
  14. MLS

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    At some point there should be a ranking for the thread

    I hope I'm not included but obviously our neighbor's daughter is up there
     
  15. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    I’m not a woman but i’d probably be top 5.
     
    Eathan Edwards, Dump and beerme like this.
  16. MLS

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    The person having to go to court for the herding cats or whatever is probably my favorite off the top of my head
     
  17. blind dog

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    bertwing 's wife wanting their child to take a real muzzle loader to school for some play is my fave off the top of my head
     
  18. MLS

    MLS Well-Known Member
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    Um, elaborate here unless you're just being sarcastic.
     
  19. The Blackfish

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    southlick
     
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  20. blind dog

    blind dog wps
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    my bad on type of weapon
     
  21. MLS

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    Ok, that's a contender
     
  22. southlick

    southlick "Better Than You"
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  23. MLS

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    So thus far we have:

    southlick having to go to court for his wife feeding what I have to assume was an absurd amount of cats
    bertwing having to prevent his wife from taking an active firearm to a show and tell at school

    strong start
     
    #17373 MLS, Mar 14, 2023
    Last edited: Mar 14, 2023
  24. football501

    football501 I once ate a Twix with the wrapper on it
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    Someone's significant other rear ended them on the daily commute to work iirc
     
  25. beerme

    beerme Well-Known Member
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    .
     
    #17375 beerme, Mar 14, 2023
    Last edited: Jan 20, 2024
  26. bertwing

    bertwing check out the nametag grandma
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    I started the initial thread because my wife backed our Denali into my sons Charger in our driveway, a few months after she backed into her moms car in our driveway. We had a rear camera and sensors beeping at her and everything.

    But definitely trying to let our daughter take a shotgun to Pioneer Day at school as a ~7 year old was definitely the blondest moment of her life
     
  27. beerme

    beerme Well-Known Member
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    yes we’ll change the thread title to “blondest shit your wife/girlfriend does”
     
    Dump and bertwing like this.
  28. southlick

    southlick "Better Than You"
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    I bought a solar powered light to hang off the top of my deck for some extra light at night for my dog.

    Well, where I decided to hang the light isn't getting enough solar to recharge it and probably won't for another few weeks because of how high the sun currently gets.

    I was telling my wife this and she says: well you'll get another hour of sun this weekend when the time changes so that should help.

    I was like:
    [​IMG]
     
  29. HotMic

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    This is amazing
     
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  30. BayouMafia

    BayouMafia Thought Leader in Posting
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    more endearing than anything, but had my dad or stepdad had a TMB of their own when I was a kid this would have been a submission

    when I was going to start playing T-ball at age 5 my mom bought me a baseball glove. Since I'm right handed it made perfect sense to her to get a glove that goes on my right hand. Thankfully the kid next door who was a couple of years older came over and corrected the fact that I was trying to throw the ball while it was in my glove before I made it to the first practice that afternoon
     
  31. MLS

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    1st ballot
     
  32. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    not even.
     
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  33. MLS

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    I'm incorporating this with the court case of feeding cats, she's on a heater....and I for one, am here for it.
     
    Dump likes this.
  34. Gambler

    Gambler Hog Fan
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    Being in the wrong state for a game has got to get some 1st place votes.
     
  35. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    You're easily included on multiple fronts but I would say thinking a lion is a pet is up there.
     
    Dump and bigred77 like this.
  36. LetItSoak

    LetItSoak Well-Known Member
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    Cats at large was an absolute classic and I still chuckle any time I see more than 2 cats in someone's yard
     
  37. Cornfed Buffalo

    Cornfed Buffalo What's a Narduzzi?
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    My guy is a Saint, who travels 15 minutes across town every Christmas to stay at his in-laws.
     
    #17387 Cornfed Buffalo, Mar 14, 2023
    Last edited: Mar 14, 2023
  38. CUgator

    CUgator Well-Known Member
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    :yolo:
     
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  39. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Look buddy you've got to learn how to throw from the glove if you want to compete in Louisiana T-ball.
     
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  40. BayouMafia

    BayouMafia Thought Leader in Posting
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    got to turn that pivot quick to get those speedsters out
     
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  41. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    Wife just picked up a jar of seasonings and went to shake it.
    guess what?
    The lid wasn't on it right and she spilled it out everywhere
     
  42. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Friend of mine's wife did the same thing recently and I guess their maltipoo just immediately started going to town scarface level when she was trying to clean it and they had to take him to the vet.
     
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  43. Baron

    Baron Well-Known Member
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    So you do have friends with "normal" pets lol
     
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  44. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Our dog sitting roster for friends is about as across the board as it gets and it happens often. From pit to snaggletooth maltipoo.
     
    One Two and Dump like this.
  45. blind dog

    blind dog wps
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    you will never be a poster smh
     
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  46. One Two

    One Two Hot Dog Vibes
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    The dude whose wife ordered like 24 pieces of dining furniture because she thought she was ordering singles and not sets is a personal fav.
     
    #17396 One Two, Mar 14, 2023
    Last edited: Mar 14, 2023
  47. One Two

    One Two Hot Dog Vibes
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    I can’t find the post and am wondering if it got lost in the crash, but my personal favorite contribution was when I was watching the Patriot with my then gf on July 4th and halfway through the movie she looked at me and said “wait, who were we fighting again?”
     
  48. bertwing

    bertwing check out the nametag grandma
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    A couple of these have been moved to protect users over the years. This is at least the 3rd thread for this topic
     
  49. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Not on the same level but the gf ordering 12 Taco Bell party packs instead of one party pack with 12 tacos was fun.
     
  50. WhiskeyDelta

    WhiskeyDelta Well-Known Member
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    Wife and I both work from home, she normally goes into the office Tuesday but was going to go in Wednesday (today) this week. So I got up early with her and cut my run short so I’d be back in time to make coffee for her travel mug and see her off. Comes down stairs as I’m filling her mug to announce she’s decided not to go into the office after all. Now missing the 30 minutes more sleep and 20 minutes more run I could have had.
     
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