CoronaVirus Disease (COVID-19) Thread : Fuck em, should’ve gotten vaccinated

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by shaolin5, Jan 20, 2020.

  1. Iron Mickey

    Iron Mickey a guy who posted here like five years ago hates me
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    Same. Last roll is on the wheel and now I'm ashamed.
     
    40wwttamgib, MoJo and Sportfan like this.
  2. pnk$krtcrÿnästÿ

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    Are there any bidets that conserve water by using a reservoir of lib tears?
     
    MoJo, Lipp, prerecordedlive and 6 others like this.
  3. DeToxRox

    DeToxRox Uncle T
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    My wife got me a bidet for Christmas.

    Soothsayer, or willing agent of destruction?
     
    Lipp, ZeroPointZero, fsutis and 9 others like this.
  4. Redav

    Redav One big ocean
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    Yeah it's stupid. People think it will be sold out so they go buy it. That's pretty much the gist of it
     
  5. pnk$krtcrÿnästÿ

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    Ah fuck me too
     
    Iron Mickey likes this.
  6. Truman

    Truman Well-Known Member
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    TC likes this.
  7. skiedfrillet

    skiedfrillet It's not a lie if you believe it.
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    Cigarettes or marijuana
     
  8. chuckmasterflex

    chuckmasterflex Attack and dethrone God
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    How many seashells do you own
     
    Lipp, Beeds07, Babou and 19 others like this.
  9. $P1

    $P1 Ball State #1
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    There was the normal amount of TP left available at my local Meijer last night. The Michigan difference
     
    Lipp, tjsblue, HuskerInMiami and 9 others like this.
  10. chuckmasterflex

    chuckmasterflex Attack and dethrone God
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  11. DeToxRox

    DeToxRox Uncle T
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    Ann Arbor Hash Bash cancelled. No longer is this a joking matter.
     
  12. Taques

    Taques sometimes maybe good sometimes maybe shit
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    The Real Movement

    i haven’t pooped in 3 weeks due to shortages
     
    2, MoJo, Lipp and 18 others like this.
  13. Thoros of Beer

    Thoros of Beer Academy Award-Winning Actor, Tim Allen
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    I've come up with a fix. Instead of buying a whole package of tp just tear a couple rolls out of the package and inform the checkout person that you only needed a couple to hold you over. Continue to do this at a different store each time until you have a package worth of tp. Problem solved.
     
    slogan119, Boo MFer! and Iron Mickey like this.
  14. infected donkey

    infected donkey Arkansas Razorbacks
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    He doesn’t know how to use the three seashells?!
     
    Lipp, ARCO, Bar None and 5 others like this.
  15. Truman

    Truman Well-Known Member
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    Went to costco yesterday. I noticed the kirkland brand was all gone and the only ones left were the more expensive brands.
     
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  16. Thoros of Beer

    Thoros of Beer Academy Award-Winning Actor, Tim Allen
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    I've been stealing tp from restaurants and putting it in my purse
     
    Baby Herschel, 2, Clegg and 35 others like this.
  17. Randy Bobandi

    Randy Bobandi Well-Known Member
    Baltimore Ravens

    My wife went to a paint & sip party, painted 3 seashells on the canvas. Hung the picture in our bathroom, she had no clue what I was talking about when I mention Demolition Man.
     
  18. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    God dam liberal who trying to take down Trump
     
  19. Redav

    Redav One big ocean
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    They might as well send us home. It's impossible to work anyway
     
  20. Imurhuckleberry

    Imurhuckleberry Avid spectator of windmill warriors
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    So then the next step is when to get tested? Normally the answer would be right away but seems that isn't the case necessarily here.
     
    HuskerInMiami likes this.
  21. Thoros of Beer

    Thoros of Beer Academy Award-Winning Actor, Tim Allen
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    It feels like signing day except that a few posters may die
     
  22. DeToxRox

    DeToxRox Uncle T
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    We all know devine is going to be the one to drag it out the longest
     
  23. slhorn

    slhorn Well-Known Member
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    This is also me.
     
  24. IanBoyd

    IanBoyd Well-Known Member
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    Anyone exactly more than 1 day older than I am.
     
  25. TC

    TC Peter, 53, from Toxteth
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    Martin misses the postseason again
     
    ashy larry, ARCO, Iron Mickey and 5 others like this.
  26. chuckmasterflex

    chuckmasterflex Attack and dethrone God
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    The thing about wives is that they never know as much about Demolition Man as you’d like
     
    Ray McKigney, Clegg, Lipp and 8 others like this.
  27. Boo MFer!

    Boo MFer! No longer a cog in some powerhouse machine
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    Sounds like a fiber shortage lol.
     
    40wwttamgib, ARCO, One Two and 2 others like this.
  28. Fuck this

    Fuck this Oh Hey
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    Same, been needing to go to Costco for that and some other stuff but have been avoiding it
     
  29. DeToxRox

    DeToxRox Uncle T
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    My work requested a thousand or so of us to work from home today to test out their upgraded VPN, and also some new remote phone app that certain associates need to use.

    IT forgot to push out the app to everyone, so we have to do this again Friday.
     
    Lipp, tjsblue, slogan119 and 7 others like this.
  30. pnk$krtcrÿnästÿ

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    I think it's funny that so much of the source of American panic over this disease is that we might not be able to behave as the sort of monstrously wasteful assholes as our birthright commands
     
  31. Crepeswithasmile

    Crepeswithasmile Well-Known Member
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    we all know michiganders wipe their asses with their hands.
     
    40wwttamgib and BuckeyeRiot like this.
  32. Taques

    Taques sometimes maybe good sometimes maybe shit
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    The Real Movement

    fiber is for healthcucks
     
    shaolin5, Iron Mickey and Boo MFer! like this.
  33. IanBoyd

    IanBoyd Well-Known Member
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    It was heading that way organically this year even w/o the coronavirus, the event this year has turned into a shit shown
     
  34. BudKilmer

    BudKilmer Well-Known Member
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    I read an article that said “everything is ok until it isn’t and then all hell breaks loose.”


    Kind of feel like that applies here with our shitheel Govt acting In the interest of the Dow instead of people
     
  35. Crepeswithasmile

    Crepeswithasmile Well-Known Member
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    you're full of shit.
     
  36. Tobias

    Tobias dan “the man qb1” jones fan account
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    i am placing the odds that the ncaa tournament actually happens at 82%. will update accordingly
     
  37. Truman

    Truman Well-Known Member
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    I went on sunday morning like an idiot and it was insane. I had to wait in a line just to get a cart. Left and went back yesterday during lunchtime and it wasnt too bad.
     
  38. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
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    Florida Gators

    Some fields give no shits, i.e. Court House/Judicial Centers.
     
    Redav likes this.
  39. Henry Blake

    Henry Blake No Springsteen is leaving this house!
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    Stay at home for a few weeks to save a lot of parents and grandparents? Nah! America 2020.
     
  40. DeToxRox

    DeToxRox Uncle T
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    I need to get to Trader Joe’s soon before people start hoarding products made from Açaí and Tumeric.
     
    Lipp, ZeroPointZero, One Two and 7 others like this.
  41. Imurhuckleberry

    Imurhuckleberry Avid spectator of windmill warriors
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    This is all a conspiracy of Big Bed, Bath, and Bidet imo.
     
  42. MtOread

    MtOread chopped and scrooged
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    My company is requiring everyone work remotely on Tuesday and Friday next week to test our intranet systems in case we have to all work remotely for a long period of time in the near future. I'm so very happy I can do my part on the Friday of the opening weekend of the NCAA tournament.
     
  43. Mr Bulldops

    Mr Bulldops If you’re juiceless, you’re useless
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    going with the poop for 24 hours straight 1 day a year method being discussed in the random thread I see. Smart
     
  44. Tobias

    Tobias dan “the man qb1” jones fan account
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    why are warriors games included then! zziiinnnnnggggg lol
     
  45. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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  46. DeToxRox

    DeToxRox Uncle T
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    Ironically enough, I kind of feel quarantined to this thread. It’s alright, I guess. If real quarantine has likes, it’ll probably be ok.
     
  47. pnk$krtcrÿnästÿ

    Donor
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    I'd like to point out a few bright points here today amid the deluge of terror

    New cases in SK have declined markedly, and recovered cases now out-pace new diagnoses. Same is true of Singapore, and has been true of China for weeks now. Raw data suggests it's true for Italy as well, but lmbo don't trust that.

    This is excellent news, and speaks to the absolute efficacy of a robust public health response and information campaigns. SK didn't have to go to the lengths that China did. They were way ahead of the curve compared to us, though.

    People like to sweat the R0 value because it was in a movie once. R0 for this is about 2, meaning it should be very hard to contain. R0, by definition, describes the coefficient of rate of spread in a naive community. As soon as we stop being and behaving naively, this number changes.

    Public fear might already be somewhat protective.
     
  48. Thoros of Beer

    Thoros of Beer Academy Award-Winning Actor, Tim Allen
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    Will this affect my supply of avocados?
     
  49. w2b

    w2b fan of: Evil Mike Norvell
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    what they get for leaving Oakland.
     
  50. NWestGator

    NWestGator peacefully coexisting amongst owls
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    I’ve been waiting for Tool to come to my city for 10 years. Am about to eat $350 worth of tickets for tonight’s show. I wanna cry.
     
    Willpépé likes this.