Annoying/Cringeworthy things your co-workers do....

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by Steve Championship, Jul 17, 2015.

  1. racer

    racer Yuma, where I work in software.
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    One man’s ‘no thanks’ is another man’s Reddit history
     
  2. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
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    So we have a new spreadsheet that all of the departments in my division are supposed to be using. It's going as well as expected. Everyone keeps editing it for their needs and not clicking the "just me" to be able to just see their own stuff. So it's now just completely shut down cause one old guy keeps just pulling up his projects and then just staying in the spreadsheet while he does whatever else hence locking it for everyone. So there's nothing anyone can do other than to keep trying to message/email/call him but I highly doubt he has teams or his email open.
     
    Taffy, Willpépé, Dump and 7 others like this.
  3. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    Do y’all use MS Teams?
     
  4. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
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    yes
     
  5. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    Just create a team and put the excel workbook in there. Anyone on the team can edit at will.
     
    CF3234, Capstone 88, Dump and 2 others like this.
  6. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
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    It's through Sharepoint and everyone can edit it as long as just click on the "just me" popup instead of the "everyone can see" one. It's just that the dude is old and keeps clicking on the everyone
     
  7. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    Fuck him. Remove his access.
     
  8. Kirk Fogg

    Kirk Fogg "Tell them what they've won Olmec!"
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    Currently working for a startup that has a significant valuation, but a CEO that thinks he's the next Steve Jobs has surrounded themselves w/ some "yes men" in the C-Suite and on the board... Needless to say, there are a lot of "pivots" from day to day, week to week that wears on teams and leaders. But there's one phrase I've grown to hate, which is "more to come."

    "We're going to totally realign how we deploy resources to major projects so that we're able to be more nimble in major projects, more to come."
    "I met with the board over the weekend to share with them our new go-to-market vision. We've got some minor refinements to make, so more to come, but I wanted to give this group a head's up as the board was really excited."
    "In my recent customer townhall I outlined why our industry needs a more disruptive pricing philosophy; there was 'violent agreement' in that group. More to come on what that will look like for us in the coming months."

    It's all just a tool to 1) hide that these major pivots/swings haven't been fully vetted or thought out, and 2) a way to head off any detailed questions/debate on the topic.
     
  9. spagett

    spagett Got ya, spooked ya
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    Violent agreement is something Emmanuel acho would say
     
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  10. seanofthedead86

    seanofthedead86 Well-Known Member
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    Theranos 2.0
     
  11. Snakes

    Snakes clumsy interloper
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    Looking forward to the Hulu docudrama on this cat in 2027
     
  12. hood b. goode

    hood b. goode with the mandem
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    Have needed a word for this concept for two weeks now
    :bow:
     
  13. Shawn Hunter

    Shawn Hunter Vote Corey Matthews for Congress
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    He sounds like a guy running a fraudulent company

    If I were you, I would get out before you have to choose between being fired or becoming a white collar criminal.
     
    Doc Louis, TC, Dump and 2 others like this.
  14. OHW

    OHW Well-Known Member
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    more to come is having a moment

    it always makes me think of tilicum (still giggle) or this song
     
  15. spagett

    spagett Got ya, spooked ya
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    Kinda surprised upward mobility and vertical integration weren't used, but that's a disruptor for you
     
  16. El Tiburon

    El Tiburon Well-Known Member
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    It’s not a real talk until synergies have been mentioned.
     
  17. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    The easiest way to correct that is a reboot. Have you tried that?

    try what? For the reboot

    have you tried a reboot?

    sorry reboot of what?

    the server

    the vm?

    if it is a vm then yes

    Power cycle or reboot

    reboot
     
    likes this.
  18. Stone Cold Steve Austin

    Stone Cold Steve Austin Tickler Extraordinaire
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    Locks computer
     
    fattus likes this.
  19. Baseballman86

    Baseballman86 Well-Known Member
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    Sitting on a conference call with overseas supplier. People were late and we started 20 mins late and are still on, with the last 15 minutes or so being people asking unnecessary, non-urgent questions with 0 acknowledgement that we're 40 mins over the scheduled end time. A guy literally just ran out of topics and asked "what else??"
     
  20. Redav

    Redav One big ocean
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    Man all that business jargon makes me want jump off a building
     
  21. jrmy

    jrmy For bookings contact Morgan at 702-374-3735
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    How am I supposed to reboot the thing if I never booted it?
     
    fattus likes this.
  22. racer

    racer Yuma, where I work in software.
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    I think you mean you want to get your latest release in flight
     
    BellottiBold, Dump, One Two and 3 others like this.
  23. ksu_funny33

    ksu_funny33 Well-Known Member
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    The phrase I hear the most that makes me consider suicide is “best practices”. It’s like nails on a chalkboard
     
  24. seanofthedead86

    seanofthedead86 Well-Known Member
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    I guess this fits here. When I was in the Navy the amount of Senior Enlisted that would say "however comma" was unnecessary and bothered the shit out of me.
     
    racer likes this.
  25. WhiskeyDelta

    WhiskeyDelta Well-Known Member
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    I’ve found myself saying this and it makes me hate myself
     
    Hatfield and seanofthedead86 like this.
  26. DuffandMuff

    DuffandMuff Well-Known Member
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    Director sent out at a company wide email announcing two promotions. Two people followed up with a reply all congratulating these folks on their promotions. Clockwork.
     
    PAHokie, jrmy, and 5 others like this.
  27. Cooler

    Cooler A mans gotta eat
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    "Period dot" to emphasize a sentence drives me crazy.
     
  28. Capt Wigs

    Capt Wigs Well-Known Member
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    Where and how did this become a thing?
     
    BellottiBold likes this.
  29. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Don't forget "developing a culture"
     
  30. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    The drama between my wife's assistant and mine is getting pretty hilarious - it's literally just peacocking any time they're around each other

    There's an important birthday party coming up next week that both have to attend - can't wait
     
    PAHokie and bigred77 like this.
  31. DollarBillHokie

    DollarBillHokie Usher is the worst
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    Yours?
     
  32. seanofthedead86

    seanofthedead86 Well-Known Member
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    I have no idea but a large number of those in the E7 and above pay grade seemed to think it was.

    "Shipmates, we have a four day weekend coming up HOWEVER COMMA duty sections will be working and not sitting around and not getting shit done."

    "Shipmates, we are pulling in to a foreign port. Make sure you go to the liberty brief HOWEVER COMMA you will not be leaving the sh,ip until your spaces a clean."
     
  33. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Two different assistants - it's like they think they need to one-up each other even though they don't work for the same company or have really any overlapping responsibilities.
     
    Dump and One Two like this.
  34. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    Every good assistant’s whole purpose in life is to one up everyone and everything.
     
    Dump and Eathan Edwards like this.
  35. Simon Templar

    Simon Templar Well-Known Member
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    We have the same issue. I’ve chosen to fuel the fire and make them almost feel as though it’s a Hunger Games scenario
     
    Brocephus, Dump, One Two and 2 others like this.
  36. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
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    212BA577-B139-464D-B622-EA2E7F0C13AA.gif
     
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  37. ramszoolander

    ramszoolander Known for Buns
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    So it's a foursome now???
     
  38. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Probably surprising to most on the board I've never done literally anything with an employee - and in my industry that was not always the easiest.
     
    ramszoolander, Brocephus and Dump like this.
  39. Jimmy the Saint

    Jimmy the Saint The future is a benevolent black hole
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    Ok what about after they were an employee?
     
    ramszoolander likes this.
  40. WhiskeyDelta

    WhiskeyDelta Well-Known Member
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    One of our new middle managers (who I already dislike) asked today if we could start getting our infrastructure surveyors back out into the field despite being COVID positive because per the law in the UK, you're no longer required to isolate after a positive test, and absolutely fuck that fucking prick. One of my boot licker ass coworkers said "well they're not obligated to pay you if you aren't working, unless you're actually sick and not just COVID positive" and I'm now angrily updating my resume.
     
    MJH, Henry Blake and bigred77 like this.
  41. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
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    Wait, so if you’re not on a vent then you’re not really sick from Covid? Fuck that guy.
     
  42. WhiskeyDelta

    WhiskeyDelta Well-Known Member
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    He's 23 and I think comes from money, since he's lived in London, Cornwall, and Cambridge, and I was an upper middle class twat at that age so I'm trying not to hold it against him personally but yes, fuck that guy.
     
    Taffy likes this.
  43. BellottiBold

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    This is fucking psycho??
     
  44. El Tiburon

    El Tiburon Well-Known Member
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    He appears to be a……..comma chameleon.

    :removing sunglasses gif:
     
  45. seanofthedead86

    seanofthedead86 Well-Known Member
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    One of the Chiefs that used to do this once went up to a girl in my work center, who was openly gay and had a shorter haircut, and told her that if she wanted to look like a boy she needed to follow the men's hair regulations. So yes, psycho.
     
  46. Doc Louis

    Doc Louis Well-Known Member
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    Welp, this happened at corporate HQ today....

    934B5B59-B006-45E1-A3AA-F3BFC6737972.jpeg
     
  47. BellottiBold

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    When they saw the cost savings when dropping the "P" there was really no choice