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Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by Gin Buckets, May 6, 2015.
I fucking ripped my boss to death on our employee engagement survey.
Jan Levinson-Gould: Sports metaphors are one of the ways women feel left out of the language of the office. Now, I know this might sound silly, but many women ask to go over it, so, "fumble" means...
Jan Levinson-Gould: Right. "Par for the course" is a golf term. It means "right on track." "Below par" means "worse." Wait. That should mean better. That doesn't make sense.
Kelly Kapoor: What about "second base"? Like, if Michael said he got to second base with you, does that mean you, like, closed a deal?
Jan Levinson-Gould: Excuse me?
Kelly Kapoor: I mean, that's a baseball term, right?
Jan Levinson-Gould: I don't know what Michael was talking about. I don't know.
Some in our organization got certified.
How much work is involved getting certified? Is it worth it?
Like a week of classes. I don't really use. I guess it depends on what your company wants to do with it
I'm insane now
You have got to be kidding me
Saw this comic. Thought of this thread.
tech company term that's really starting to get to me - calling the testing environment the sandbox
"Is that through QA yet?"
"It hasn't made it there, it's still in our sandbox."
*shoots up office*
i can top that, i think
when i joined my current org i realized everyone referred to the testing environment as the "production environment," like where people "produce things."
i tried to explain that the term "production environment" typically refers to the live environment and is explicitly not for testing, and got: "Uh well that's what we call it here."
my biggest pet peeve term right now is the misuse of the word "insight".
I'm sorry creative department...but you googling shit and coming back with "Millennials use their smart devices a lot" (or some other readily available common knowledge) isn't insightful and doesnt make you sound smart. Apparently we have a lot of people by saying "we provide insights" makes them sound smarter.
That makes no fucking sense
That is hilarious. They could have chosen any weird name to call test/dev but they chose the only word that literally means the opposite of what they mean.
do you work for a startup?
It's all about that problem, insight, solution.
seems like it's only a matter of time until this causes a big problem with someone new
I mean you can do some fucked up shit and be like what the fuck but test is test and production is production
I feel bad for people new to the industry that work there and will have learned things totally backwards. Not to mention how hard their job has to be when they call customers and sound like they have no idea what they are talking about because they switch those terms. I feel like it wouldn't matter how hard you insist Production is test/dev lol
Can't believe it is already March! Wow!
Agree our developers say it. Started putting it on marketing materials forcing us to have to explain what the fuck that means at conferences and meetings.
You can't be a developer without using "sandbox" regularly. But yea I can see how it is annoying as fuck
This thread needs to be more lean. Who wants to oversee a kaizen event to find muda and identify some areas ripe for process improvement? Where are our Six Sigma blackbelts. Are you all in?!
You know what works better than Kaizen to find inefficiency? Give the task to the laziest member on your team. They're the best at finding steps you can skip. lazy team members so much
These are all hot button items.
"When do we need this by?"
"End of March, but our drop dead date is 4/15."
"So 4/15, but 3/31 if possible? Got it."
Even though I'm out of corporate I hate how much I still relate to this thread
You're not in corporate? Maybe stay in your swim lane.
Well who's got the bogey on this then? We can take this offline.
Thread title still makes me laugh whenever I see it.
Time flies when you're having fun amiright!
Each team has a silo'd approach when we'd get far better ROI if there was a cross-collaborative effort across the enterprise.
Sent: 3/29/2017 4:37:44 PM
Subject: Caution!! Buliding 2 / Building 3 Courtyard
To All Building 2 andBuilding 3 Tenants:
A Canadian goose has laid her eggs in the courtyard between the buildings near the pond. Unfortunately, we cannot displace the eggs at this time because of the Federal Law, the Migratory Bird Act, as well as the Ohio Revised Code. We will need a permit from ODNR to move eggs and we do not have one as of yet. Please use caution if walking in or through the courtyard, as you may know, geese are known to be aggressive if they feel threatened. We have been told the geese may stay there for approximately 40-45 days. We apologize for this inconvenience.
Thank you for sharing this. It's about time that we start cross collaborating on communication instead of working in silos.
Taking this "offline" doesnt even make sense. One of my top 5 least favorite.
Wut? It's related to conference calls. Take it off the phone...off the line...offline.
I hear it used in person 90 percent of the time. Someone asks a question during the meeting and they say " I can answer this offline", which doesnt make sense because you were not on the line.
Right. It's colloquially used now to mean in a later setting.
Sometimes it's necessary to let the team know you're playing devil's advocate before you declare that it may indeed need to be taken offline.
a lot of blocking and tackling today
This guy clearly doesn't have enough skin in the game. Team, let's level set and work on a PIP (performance improvement plan) for Mitch.
User Mitch Cumstein's idea of corporate speak:
When we have to put an emergency bug fix or something else into production, it's called an Emergency Deployment. Everyone calls it an "emer" for short. Just in the past couple of weeks, I've seen people writing it in emails as E-mer. It makes me feel angry.
Sorry. I was on mute.
"HAHA! We were wondering if you fell asleep on us!"