Death Row Meal

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by BamaNug, May 19, 2022.

  1. Nug

    Nug MexicanNug
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    Alabama Crimson TideSeattle MarinersAtlanta BravesNew Orleans Saints

    You, the-TMB poster, have been sentenced to death by firing squad. The appeals have run, the ink is dry, and you are set to expire at midnight. Dump is the executioner, just because.

    What is your last meal? In this state of the art mainprison, we can fly in chefs from all over the world to prepare your last meal. What'll it be? Name your top three. It'll even be free. It could be brie. Maybe with tea? But remember, this is it for thee. For after that, you will fall to the knee.

    For me:
    1. Eggs benedict with homemade hollandaise -- probably one crab cake benedict and one salmon lox benedict
    2. General Tsao's chicken, fried rice, crab rangoon
    3. A huge Reuben sandwich with sweet potato fries, side of honey mustard
     
    ashy larry, Fusiontegra, ARCO and 8 others like this.
  2. Owsley

    Owsley My friends call me Bear
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    Alabama Crimson TideAtlanta BravesAtlanta UnitedTottenham HotspurGrateful DeadUnited States Men's National Soccer Team

    Two dozen Murder Point oysters on the half shell
    Slab of spare ribs from Archibald’s
    Fried catfish
    Hoppin’ John, collards, and cornbread
    Coconut pie
     
  3. dblplay1212

    dblplay1212 Well-Known Member
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    Alabama Crimson TideNew York YankeesJacksonville Jaguars2pacSneakersFormula 1

    Shrimp po'boy with NOLA bread and hushpuppies.

    Thanks.
     
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  4. Nug

    Nug MexicanNug
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    Alabama Crimson TideSeattle MarinersAtlanta BravesNew Orleans Saints

    yea, two or three dozen raw oysters would be my app for any of my choices. Good call.

    Some from the South, some from PNW, some from abroad.
     
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  5. IHHH

    IHHH Well-Known Member
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    Notre Dame Fighting IrishCleveland BrownsMontreal Canadiens

    After a half ass research on google i am still a bit confused about general Tao, general tso and general tsao
     
    Fusiontegra and Baron like this.
  6. Irush

    Irush Well-Known Member
    Donor TMB OG

    1. My mom’s pollo guisado (stewed chicken and chorizo with rice and beans)
    2. A dozen norumbega oysters on the half shell
    3. A negroni
     
  7. $P1

    $P1 Ball State #1
    Staff Donor TMB OG
    Michigan WolverinesChicago CubsLos Angeles LakersChicago BearsChicago BlackhawksWest Ham UnitedBall State Cardinals

    Pizza King

    CC: TMB Muncie
     
  8. TrustyPatches

    TrustyPatches Life is is a bunch of ups and Caleb Downs
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    Alabama Crimson TideChicago CubsNew Orleans PelicansWu-tang

    Fried Chicken Livers and gravy over rice
    Homemade Mac and cheese
    Collards with turkey necks
    All the hot sauce

    I’m trying to violently shit myself when I go
     
  9. Nug

    Nug MexicanNug
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideSeattle MarinersAtlanta BravesNew Orleans Saints

    One 32oz Crowler of Cloudburst fresh hop IPA, assuming I expire in the fall.

    For dessert some cookie dough
     
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  10. soulfly

    soulfly Well-Known Member
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    Seattle MarinersSeattle SeahawksBarcelonaSeattle SupersonicsSeattle SoundersSeattle Kraken

    Lengua tacos and a shrimp cocktail to get things started

    Artichoke

    King crab legs
    Dungeness crab
    Scallops

    Tortilla in lieu of dessert
     
    SD_Irish, Fancy, One Two and 5 others like this.
  11. War Grundle

    War Grundle Nole Mercy
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    Florida State SeminolesTampa Bay Rays

    1) Lobster Bisque, Bacon wrapped scallops, Truffle rissotto, asparagus w/ hollandaise and a Manahattan
    2) Bacon double wagyu cheese burger w/ fried egg, sweet potato fries and Cheerwine
    3) Steamed pork dumplings, General Tsao, pork fried rice and an egg roll
     
  12. Stone Cold Steve Austin

    Stone Cold Steve Austin Tickler Extraordinaire
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    Alabama Crimson TideAtlanta Braves

    Milo’s Mega Meal, peach pie
     
    Odin, Oranjello, One Two and 4 others like this.
  13. nexus

    nexus TMB’s TSO
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    I'm asking for this so the firing squad won't seem nearly as bad
    :truman:
     
    #14 nexus, May 19, 2022
    Last edited: May 19, 2022
  14. 40wwttamgib

    40wwttamgib Fah Q, Ohio
    Donor

    pizza from nyc
    half gallon of finely aged (8 years) blue bell ice cream from lechs freezer collection
    o charley's spicy jack cheese wedges with spicy marinara
     
    One Two, Tiffin, FTK and 2 others like this.
  15. Line 4 Guy

    Line 4 Guy Well-Known Member
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    Texas LonghornsTexas RangersDallas CowboysFC Dallas

    1) Pan seared medium rare ribeye with 3 over easy eggs. 2 pieces of toast. Orange juice.
    2) Smoked brisket. Piece of pecan pie. Half n half tea
    3) Beef ribs. Baked mac n cheese. 1 Piece each of coconut pie and pina colada cake. Big ass Dr Pepper.
     
    #16 Line 4 Guy, May 19, 2022
    Last edited: May 19, 2022
  16. Emma

    Emma
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    Wisconsin BadgersMilwaukee Brewers altMilwaukee BucksGreen Bay Packers

    Shit ton of different sushi rolls

    Home made dirt pie
     
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  17. Celemo

    Celemo tell 'em Steve-Dave
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    Michigan WolverinesPortland Trail BlazersDetroit Tigers

    I'm a simple man

    1. Safeway's Fried chicken, bag of plain ruffles, coke zero
    2. Taco Bell Cheesy Gordita Crunch Xs 2, chips and cheese, Baja Blast
    3. Pequod's deep dish sausage pizza, Coors Light
     
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  18. Voodoo

    Voodoo Fan of: Notre Dame
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    Notre Dame Fighting IrishTottenham HotspurSan Francisco Giants

    Pigeon (if it’s a Tuesday)
    Pear salad for dessert
     
  19. devine

    devine hi, i am user devine
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  20. bro

    bro Your Mother’s Favorite Shitposter
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    that ass
     
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  21. Baron

    Baron Well-Known Member
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    Skyline Chili duh
     
  22. Daniel Ocean

    Daniel Ocean I only lied about being a thief
    Staff Donor TMB OG
    UCLA BruinsDenver BroncosLos Angeles KingsSneakersBook Club

    1. Dozen oysters
    2. Rib eye medium rare.
    3. Campechana
    4. 3 two fingers of michter's 20 year.
    5. probably some sort of cheese cake
     
  23. Homo Erectus

    Homo Erectus The important thing is, you think I'm attractive
    Donor

    A lot of Taco bell & laxitives. I hear you shit yourself when you die so I want to leave Dump a messy names sake.
    #splashmountain
     
  24. tylerdolphin

    tylerdolphin My spoon is too big
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    Miami HurricanesNew York YankeesMiami Dolphins

    Rack of lamb, medium rare. A huge dry aged ribeye on the side, medium rare. Bottle of pinot noir. Fuck it, don't have to worry about my arteries anymore.
     
  25. blind dog

    blind dog wps
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    Arkansas RazorbacksGreen Bay PackersWu-tangCoors Light

    A shit ton of all kinds of shellfish, I haven't been able to eat any for 9 years now
     
  26. GrizzliesDrew

    GrizzliesDrew Fuck Freeze
    Donor TMB OG
    Auburn TigersMemphis Grizzlies

    Shrimp etoufee
    Porterhouse steak
    Chicken Yakimeshi with yum yum sauce
     
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  27. poor paul

    poor paul Well-Known Member
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    Wrexham AFC

    there's a good and morbid book about what actual death row inmates choose. almost always something comforting, or reminding them of a better time in their life, less so than extravagant or involved. I forgot the name, however.

    1. two chili cheese dogs, french fries (preferably fresh cut), pbr
    2. ribeye medium+, robuchon potatos, pan sauce, heavy pour of a quality bourbon (big rock)
    3. two eggs over medium, bacon, crispy hash browns, fresh fruit, sourdough toast with room temperature butter, tito's-soda-lemon

    yellowtail crudo appetizer for each, warm brownie ala mode dessert for each.
     
    #28 poor paul, May 19, 2022
    Last edited: May 19, 2022
  28. EMAW FC

    EMAW FC Proud Smucker
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    Kansas State WildcatsKansas City RoyalsKansas City ChiefsFulhamSporting Kansas CitySneakers

    1 from my family: my g-ma's arroz con habichuelas with liver/onions
    2: guilty pleasure Taco Bell Double Decker (bringing it back just for me), Nacho Cheese Chalupa, Cheesy Gordita Crunch 10 Fire Sauce packets, Medium Mountain Dew.
    3 fine dining: Meat sampler from Slaps BBQ (ribs, burnt ends, brisket, sausage) with bbq beans, baked potato casserole, and street corn
     
    Fancy, ARCO, One Two and 5 others like this.
  29. Shawn Hunter

    Shawn Hunter Vote Corey Matthews for Congress
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    Kentucky WildcatsBoston CelticsNew England PatriotsUniversity of LynchburgAEW

    My mom's lasagna and mac and cheese
    Brisket, fried catfish and pulled pork BBQ from Fishin' Pig
    Fried chicken from Granny B's
    Cajun filet chicken biscuit with bacon, egg, and cheese from Bojangles
    Chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream
    Detroit style pan pizza
     
  30. BrickTamland

    BrickTamland You're not Ron...
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    Florida State Seminoles

    [​IMG]
     
  31. BrickTamland

    BrickTamland You're not Ron...
    Donor
    Florida State Seminoles

    I keep seeing this thread and reading “death row metal.”
     
  32. soulfly

    soulfly Well-Known Member
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    Seattle MarinersSeattle SeahawksBarcelonaSeattle SupersonicsSeattle SoundersSeattle Kraken

    Hot or cold?
     
  33. UncleJesse

    UncleJesse Did I invent hip-hop? No, but I was there.
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    Alabama Crimson TideAtlanta BravesPhoenix SunsDallas Cowboys

    Probably a meal from Dorsia.
     
  34. Tiffin

    Tiffin ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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    Alabama Crimson TideLos Angeles LakersNew Orleans SaintsGrateful DeadToolAEW

    Not sure i have 3 separate meals but I think about this frequently and sometimes reasses but the top things remain the same.

    -Wings, 2 dozen, smoked and flash fried. Half the spiciest jerk season I can get, half cajun dry rub with alabama white sauce on the side. Good chunky blue cheese and good homemade buttermilk ranch as well.
    -Mac and cheese. Cunty is good, but shells and cheese is acceptable. Ideally something like a.tramp 's Chipotle bacon mac that I've made a couple times and was fuego.
    -chocolate delight. Not sure if people have other names for it but it's a family staple desert over the year. Could go with a lot of things here but it works for this meal. That or our banana pudding.

    After that top meal, there's lot of stuff I'd love to add onto it or would also potentially take depending on my mood.

    -chili cheese tots/fries. Homemade good but sonic also acceptable. Add jalapeño and onions.
    -Nashville hot chicken (noticing a trend?) Had some amazing hot chicken bao buns at a Ramen place there, they'd be top choice.
    -veggie samosas.
    -lamb vindaloo (v spicy obvi) with rice and garlic Naan
    -lingua tacos with a selection if salsas
    -the Mexican pizza from our favorite Mexican spot with chicken and chorizo
    -shrimp poboy. If fried, shrimp and oyster from Domilise's, if grilled the one from Erin Rose I had again a couple weeks ago that was still as good as I remembered from 8 years ago. Both NOLA spots.
    -my grandma's breakfast, if we're being unrealistic. I can replicate the sausage/bacon/dark roux bacon fat gravy. What I've been unable to duplicate and neither has any other person or place I've tried, her hotcakes. So buttery. Cover in syrup. The best.
    -strawberry buttermilk ice cream from Loblolly in LR. Recently tried and maybe my favorite ice cream ever. Key lime pie and bread pudding are also desert honorable mentions.
    -hummus from Saba or Safta with their fresh pita


    All of this would be accompanied by a selection of cunty beers. Sours, IPAs, stouts. Some funky ass Brett beer to finish. If I'm limited, Ghost in the Machine or Two Hearted for something I can't go wrong with. Also cocktails. Painkillers and Manhattans.

    I'm sure I could come up with others but of recently tried/in the mood and the top staples, that's the list.
     
  35. Shawn Hunter

    Shawn Hunter Vote Corey Matthews for Congress
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    Kentucky WildcatsBoston CelticsNew England PatriotsUniversity of LynchburgAEW

    Why is this something you think about frequently?
     
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  36. Tiffin

    Tiffin ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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    Alabama Crimson TideLos Angeles LakersNew Orleans SaintsGrateful DeadToolAEW

    Because death comes for us all, Shawn.
     
  37. Shawn Hunter

    Shawn Hunter Vote Corey Matthews for Congress
    Donor
    Kentucky WildcatsBoston CelticsNew England PatriotsUniversity of LynchburgAEW

    Not death row
     
  38. Tiffin

    Tiffin ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideLos Angeles LakersNew Orleans SaintsGrateful DeadToolAEW

    Last meal, safe difference you buttwipe
     
  39. blind dog

    blind dog wps
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    Arkansas RazorbacksGreen Bay PackersWu-tangCoors Light

    He's planning on murdering you, duh
     
  40. NilesIrish

    NilesIrish Not a master fisher but I know bait when I see it
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    Notre Dame Fighting IrishChicago CubsChicago BullsChicago BearsChicago BlackhawksDemocrat

    Food takes some thought,

    I am drinking my weight in Coors Light and Jameson and Ginger as that was my poison of choice before I got sober.
     
  41. Simon Templar

    Simon Templar Well-Known Member
    Kansas JayhawksChicago CubsSneakersBig 8 Conference

    That looks incredibly depressing.
     
    One Two and devine like this.
  42. It'sAlwaysSunnyInAthens

    It'sAlwaysSunnyInAthens Well-Known Member
    Donor

    Crab cake, steak with fried lobster. Mac and cheese, creamed spinach, baked potato.

    Fried ravioli, some sort of Italian soup, shrimp parmesan with homemade pasta.

    Third one is hard... Bbq/Japanese/burgers
     
    One Two and War Grundle like this.
  43. Super Vegeta

    Super Vegeta I'm starting to feel like I'm entering my slut era
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    South Carolina GamecocksCarolina Panthers

    Just feed me a fully loaded baconator from Wendys so we can induce a heart attack and get this over with early.
     
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  44. Wicket

    Wicket Fan: ND, PSV, Pool FC, Cricket, Urquel, Dog Crew
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    Notre Dame Fighting IrishSan Francisco GiantsNew Orleans SaintsChicago Cubs

    given that i dont have to bother about cholesterol etc id go
    foie gras with brioche toast and a tokaji wine pairing
    escargot(so snales yall) in garlic butter
    Wagyu ribeye with fries and no other BS
    white chocolate mousse with toasted pistachio crumb and raspberry sauce

    I better hope they electrocute me or something cuz if theyre hanging me the rope is breaking after that meal
     
  45. Simon Templar

    Simon Templar Well-Known Member
    Kansas JayhawksChicago CubsSneakersBig 8 Conference

    Probably just get restaurant stuff

    Seoul Food Meat Company, Charlotte
    upload_2022-5-19_16-53-55.jpeg

    Mary Mahoneys, Biloxi
    [​IMG]

    Stinkys Fish Camp
    [​IMG]
     
  46. NilesIrish

    NilesIrish Not a master fisher but I know bait when I see it
    Donor TMB OG
    Notre Dame Fighting IrishChicago CubsChicago BullsChicago BearsChicago BlackhawksDemocrat

    Crawfish cargot with a good bread
    Rib tips and fries
    shrimp cocktail with St. Elmos sauce
    King crab legs w/ drawn butter
    Bacon cheeseburger from the tavern down the street w/fried mushrooms
    Key Lime Coconut cake
     
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  47. Daniel Ocean

    Daniel Ocean I only lied about being a thief
    Staff Donor TMB OG
    UCLA BruinsDenver BroncosLos Angeles KingsSneakersBook Club

    A hot campechana is a siete mares soup. Unless we are talking about something different, I’ve never heard of or eaten a hot canpechana. The one I mean is a seafood cocktail which usually includes oysters, muscles, shrimp, octopus among other things and cucumbers, avocado generally served with crackers or the inferior (in this case) tostadas.
     
    Tiffin likes this.
  48. (Z)

    (Z) Well-Known Member
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    Alabama Crimson TideBoston Red Sox

    I would struggle with this.

    Shrimp Cocktail

    Hot wings

    Ribeye medium rare—some potato and salad

    Bread pudding
     
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  49. soulfly

    soulfly Well-Known Member
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    Seattle MarinersSeattle SeahawksBarcelonaSeattle SupersonicsSeattle SoundersSeattle Kraken

    I usually get asked for temp preference :idk:

    https://themazatlanpost.com/2020/01/17/campechana-hot-in-mazatlan-cold-in-culiacan-why/?amp