Dick moves: Home of the Roscoe.

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by Hoss Bonaventure, Feb 23, 2017.

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  1. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure Don’t touch the bike
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    If there's traffic I turn on my hazard lights and just go around it on the shoulder now. :shruggin:
     
  2. zeberdee

    zeberdee hungry dogs run faster
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    if I saw you coming I'd pull half-way onto the shoulder so you couldn't get by.
     
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  3. cool, you are a bitch
     
  4. allothersnsused

    allothersnsused Wow that’s crazy
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    My favorite dick move is to put it in a vagina
     
  5. BROADWAY JOE

    BROADWAY JOE The Original Guarantee!
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    I leave my shopping cart right next to my car after I unload the groceries.
     
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  6. Lemmy Caution

    Lemmy Caution Lurking since Alice's mugshot
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    Boarding the subway before passengers can get off.
     
  7. Sweet Dick Willie

    Donor TMB OG
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    Thanks for the dents, prick
     
  8. Jake Scott

    Jake Scott Well-Known Member
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    I throw shit out of the window at cars that try that shit.
     
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  9. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Yeah I can make my dick move.
     
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  10. brolift

    brolift The truth is not depressing.
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    During holidays I go to the candy isle at stores and use my thumb to poke holes in those hollow chocolate bears.

    Its satisfying asf.
     
  11. bertwing

    bertwing check out the nametag grandma
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    What a disappointing thread given the thread title
     
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  12. George Costanza

    George Costanza It's not a lie if you believe it
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    A popular move of mine for on ramps that merge down to one lane - I'll just cruise right in the middle to cut off any asshole that thinks they've somehow earned the right to try and jump the line
     
  13. bertwing

    bertwing check out the nametag grandma
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    Whoa man fuck you

    Think of the children
     
  14. brolift

    brolift The truth is not depressing.
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    I'm not a pedophile
     
  15. timo

    timo you'll be fine at the end of the line
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    that's why you're fat, Joe. :twocents:
     
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  16. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure Don’t touch the bike
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    What about elevators? GoodForAnother
     
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  17. angus

    angus Well-Known Member
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    Not sure what I was expecting from this thread but it definitely involved pics.
     
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  18. boone

    boone Destination Unknown
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    West Ham United

    you're that dick that has a vanity plate right??
     
  19. sam shakusky

    sam shakusky let there be songs to fill the air
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    WWE

    Straight shot for me to get downtown every morning that gets congested bc of a long traffic light. There will be easily 200 cars lined up in the left lane with a full half mile stretch wide open in the right lane that ends up being turn only. I just cruise down the right lane until I see some slow driver or idiot playing on their phone that didn't notice traffic was moving again and slide right in front of them right around the intersection. Nobody harmed imo. So dick move or genius move?
     
  20. boone

    boone Destination Unknown
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    West Ham United

    I don't hold doors for people.

    I slam it in their faces
     
  21. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure Don’t touch the bike
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    I live in Arkansas, home of the absolute most non-aggressive drivers in the United States. No one would ever even think to do it because the vast majority of people driving have their head shoved up their asses.
     
  22. One Two

    One Two Send it!
    Auburn TigersAtlanta Braves

    This is acceptable. I refer to it as sniping, and I too look for people more interested in their phones than driving.

    Edit: it becomes a dick move if the sniper decides to come to a complete stop and put on their blinker and beg for a spot, impeding the progress of others in the lane. Unfortunately this scenario also usually involves someone who was too busy on their phone to notice their lane ends.
     
  23. bertwing

    bertwing check out the nametag grandma
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    If marcus were still here, he'd tell a lovely tale about Arkansas drivers and how fucking stupid they are... driving like 10 under the speed limit in the fast lane and refusing to pass any cars in the slow lane
     
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  24. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure Don’t touch the bike
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    All day brilliant move. You know you're going to be able to get over in front of a semi. They have to stay so many feet away from the car in front of them. The "rule of seconds".
     
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  25. Lemmy Caution

    Lemmy Caution Lurking since Alice's mugshot
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    Yes.
     
  26. Houndster

    Houndster Ball don't lie
    Staff Donor

    I love boxing people in that ride my ass.

    Wait this thread is about traffic?
     
  27. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure Don’t touch the bike
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    Arkansas RazorbacksSt. Louis CardinalsDallas CowboysPittsburgh SteelersCalgary Flames

    Every. Fucking. Day. Everyone drives with 2-3 car lengths in between them as well and come to a stop to exit. When I first moved back a guy ahead of me kissed that wall on 49. He stopped his car in the left lane and got out to see the damage.
     
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  28. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure Don’t touch the bike
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    And moving dicks.
     
  29. BROADWAY JOE

    BROADWAY JOE The Original Guarantee!
    UCLA BruinsNew York YankeesLos Angeles DodgersNew York KnicksLos Angeles LakersNew York GiantsNew York JetsSan Diego ChargersNew York RangersLos Angeles Kings

    My uncle Jr taught me this when I was 10 years old...he'd take me to McDonald's and when we were done I'd get up to empty my tray. He'd say "whoa, waddayou doin....see that kid ova dere wiping da table? You want to put him outta of job?....put it down, let's go"

    I passed it on to my kids, who will pass it on to theirs someday....
     
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  30. bertwing

    bertwing check out the nametag grandma
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    Should have hit him. Teach him a lesson
     
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  31. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure Don’t touch the bike
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    He was a few cars ahead of me but I would have thrown a handful of change at him for sure. I've also noticed people get in the left lane and then get scared of the wall and slow down to 30 because they are legit retards.
     
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  32. sam shakusky

    sam shakusky let there be songs to fill the air
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    Made me lol, I bet uncle Junior was a gem
     
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  33. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure Don’t touch the bike
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    I used to go to the deli at Walmart and get an order of chicken nuggets and I would eat them while shopping and just put the empty container on a shelf.
     
  34. bro

    bro Hey Hermano
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    I don't want to be anywhere near you after this thread, plus all the times you shit your pants
     
  35. Shawn Hunter

    Shawn Hunter ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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    IT was a dick move to create the dick move thread
     
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  36. Chipper>Jeter

    Chipper>Jeter Fuck Gus and fuck Sark
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    Get my kids to cut in line
     
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  37. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure Don’t touch the bike
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    Arkansas RazorbacksSt. Louis CardinalsDallas CowboysPittsburgh SteelersCalgary Flames

    I once shit my pants on purpose because I had to shit really bad and my roommate just stopped the car and let off the gas to be a dick so I let it loose in the passenger seat.
     
  38. Redav

    Redav My favorite meat is hot dog
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    I get hella mad at people in traffic for doing the same shit I do
     
  39. Hank Scorpio

    Hank Scorpio Globex Corporation, Philanthropist, Supervillain
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    I did this all the time when I had to take a specific route home for a couple of years. I was never the asshole that stopped if I couldn't find an opening because if I missed it I could just make the next turn at the light and be on the same road.

    On that note, nothing pisses me off more than when people miss their turn because they're in the wrong lane and just stop and wait for an opening. Just accept the loss and make a U-turn down the road.
     
  40. Truman

    Truman Well-Known Member
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    Big fan of the "Have you seen my new wrist watch?" move.
     
  41. Redav

    Redav My favorite meat is hot dog
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    I hate this. When I legitimately have to turn and some dick head is just trying to pass by all the traffic and i have to sit and wait for someone to let them in.
     
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  42. Daddy Rabbit

    Daddy Rabbit Got my name painted on my shirt
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    #LIFEHACK
     
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  43. dahldennsull

    dahldennsull Living in the best state
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    you're actually being the dick here... educate yourself



    if everyone would fill up both lanes and merge at the end instead of beginning of ramps everyone would get there a lot faster
     
  44. brolift

    brolift The truth is not depressing.
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    It says ONION69
     
  45. boone

    boone Destination Unknown
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    West Ham United

    FRTSNFR
     
  46. TLAU

    TLAU Dog Crew
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    less than a page and someone has slid in an act of theft as a "dick move" similar to the #lifehack thread guy that was stealing shit.
     
  47. Luka

    Luka rookie poster
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    this is me
     
  48. George Costanza

    George Costanza It's not a lie if you believe it
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    Game theory. If one person cheats, then everyone is going to cheat the next time around. I'm not blindly trusting the public to play nice
     
  49. dahldennsull

    dahldennsull Living in the best state
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    touche
     
  50. Nelson

    Nelson Can somebody please get Ja Rule on the phone
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    Walking on the left side of the sidewalk in America
     
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