Florida Man Thread - Florida woman says Jags are no longer playing by the Rules

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by Duval, May 12, 2015.

  1. southlick

    southlick "Better Than You"
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  2. southlick

    southlick "Better Than You"
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  3. Boo MFer!

    Boo MFer! UCF has a clown car of talent at RB and WR.
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    blind dog and fsugrad99 like this.
  4. Icculus is a Bammer

    Icculus is a Bammer marco esquandolas took my job
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    Got us a Florida mugshawty right here
     
  5. fsugrad99

    fsugrad99 I'm the victim here
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    He apparently was a part of #FSUTwitter

     
  6. TheFreak55

    TheFreak55 Mullet Crissy is the best Crissy
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  7. Nick Rivers

    Nick Rivers Well-Known Member
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    https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.da...reads-feces-site-students-birthday-party.html

    Florida teacher spreads feces across site of student's birthday party

    [​IMG]
    Heather Carpenter, 42, (pictured) has been charged with third-degree felony mischief after she admitted to smearing feces on tables and grills where a young student's birthday party was being held in December
    A Florida substitute teacher has been charged with third-degree felony mischief after she smeared human fecal matter across a pavilion where a young student's birthday party was being held.
     
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  8. kinghill

    kinghill Well-Known Member
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  9. steamengine

    steamengine I don’t want to press one for English!
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    Florida man has gone mainstream

     
  10. Boo MFer!

    Boo MFer! UCF has a clown car of talent at RB and WR.
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    TC
     
  11. Jack Parkman

    Jack Parkman Well-Known Member
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  12. bertwing

    bertwing check out the nametag grandma
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    I respect the commitment

     
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  13. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
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    Lewis was later freed on $11,250 bond — this time managing to actually leave.
     
  14. Jack Parkman

    Jack Parkman Well-Known Member
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  15. Jack Parkman

    Jack Parkman Well-Known Member
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  16. Jack Parkman

    Jack Parkman Well-Known Member
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  17. w2b

    w2b underrated dumbass
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  18. Pelican

    Pelican COOL huh
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    Imagine owning something like that.

     
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  19. Cheshire Bridge

    Cheshire Bridge 2017 & 2019 National Champions - Clemson Tigers
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    Haha that guy got taken out by a bi....oh...shootings.... Well, I'll be a monkeys uncle. That things a velociraptor
     
  20. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
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    live by the cassowary die by the cassowary.
     
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  21. Jack Parkman

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  22. spagett

    spagett Got ya, spooked ya
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    He was breeding them.

    Guy was asking for it
     
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  23. Nick Rivers

    Nick Rivers Well-Known Member
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    Florida man steals pool floats to have sex with them instead of raping women, he told cops
    David Boroff
    [​IMG]
    Christopher Monnin is a suspected serial pool float thief. (Brevard County Sheriff's Office)

    A 35-year-old Florida man says he swipes pool floats and has sex with them as an alternative to raping women, according to authorities.

    The bizarre and horrifying admission was made by Christopher Monnin in connection with the theft of 13 pool floats in Palm Bay over the past seven months, according to the Sebastian Daily.

    Monnin was arrested after he was found with a garbage bag full of deflated floats on Thursday.

    “Defendant stated that he sexually gratifies himself with the floats and does this instead of raping women,” read the police report obtained by the Sebastian Daily.

    Investigators found about 75 pool floats at his home in Palm Bay. He was charged with burglary, theft and criminal mischief and is being held at the Brevard County Jail with a bond of $78,500
     
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  24. TC

    TC How to grill hamburger
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    I am looking good at 35 compared to that guy
     
  25. broken internet

    broken internet Everything I touch turns to gold.
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    UPDATE: Justice for Pinky!! :sixflagsguy:

    https://www.wftv.com/news/trending-...dens-fatally-struck-by-pickup-truck/961639348
     
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  26. Charles DeMar

    Charles DeMar Smug Outlaw
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  27. Captain Caveman

    Captain Caveman Where have you gone TMB?
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    I wondered what Harvey Keitel was up to
     
  28. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
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  29. Nick Rivers

    Nick Rivers Well-Known Member
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    This Is the Weirdest, Grossest Camel Story You'll Ever Read
    It went down at a truck stop in Louisiana last week

    [​IMG]
    One of Caspar's fellow dromedaries reacts to this story. (Getty Images/Maurice Dawson)

    By Jenn Gidman, Newser Staff
    Posted Sep 23, 2019 8:42 AM CDT
    Comment
    (NEWSER) – A Florida woman escaped from under a camel by biting its testicles after she crawled into the animal's pen to rescue her dog and the camel sat on her, authorities say. That's pretty much the story. If you crave more details, though, they're out there, including that the 600-pound camel's name is Caspar; the incident took place last week at the Tiger Truck Stop in Grosse Tete, La.; and "the camel did nothing wrong," per Iberville Parish Deputy Louis Hamilton Jr. What exactly went down in what the Washington Post calls "a mad-lib series of unfortunate events": Hamilton tells the Advocate that the woman and her husband had pulled over at the truck stop to let their dog stretch its legs, and the husband inexplicably started throwing treats for their dog into the camel's enclosure.

    That's when the dog went into the pen, the couple followed (the dog is deaf and wasn't responding to them), and the camel got jittery, says the facility's manager, Pamela Bossier. The camel reacted by squatting on the woman, who then did what she thought she needed to do to escape. "She said, 'I bit his balls to get him off of me, I bit his testicles to get him off of me,'" Hamilton says, adding the couple was "aggressive" with Caspar. Although Bossier says no animal at the truck stop—which features a petting zoo with a baby kangaroo and a mini-horse—has ever acted out like this, the venue has long been controversial: It used to house a Bengal tiger named Tony, which activists tried for years to get released; Tony died last year. Bossier says Caspar doesn't seem to be hurt. It's not clear what injuries the woman suffered. The couple was cited for trespassing and a leash law violation.
     
  30. Pelican

    Pelican COOL huh
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  31. w2b

    w2b underrated dumbass
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  32. fsugrad99

    fsugrad99 I'm the victim here
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  33. The Banks

    The Banks TMB's Alaskan
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    Should also note that he is a white supremacist
     
  34. JGator1

    JGator1 I'm the Michael Jordan of the industry
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  35. Jack Parkman

    Jack Parkman Well-Known Member
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  36. Jack Parkman

    Jack Parkman Well-Known Member
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  37. Jack Parkman

    Jack Parkman Well-Known Member
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