Separate names with a comma.
Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by Hoss Bonaventure, Jul 8, 2015.
Help me recover faster and minimize the effects. I am not a smart man.
Being unable to run when you're about to shit lest you destroy your pants is one of the worst things ever.
I just got this in a group text.
First response was "Again?"
Hoss Bonaventure you are an inspiration
I love this thread.
Why in the hell would they stop doing that and go to a bathroom?
Everyone in my house has a stomach bug.
I missed almost the entire super bowl shitting thru both ends . Never had that happen before.
3rd time this school year I've diarrhea'd in my car on my way to work
I'll gladly attach a photo of my now brown seat cover
There is nothing more funny than someone shitting their pants
Had a close one Wednesday. Praise the good lord above because I was pardoned from my 2 hour long meeting.
It was a hot mess. Light brown. 90% water. It was like I was wiping with a marker.
It suck back up in your butthole?
Solid nodding session in the mirror looking at yourself in the eyes for an hour then some oxyclean for the seat and whiskey for your soul should set you right.
By the way, the outlining stain is from a previous session this year
Looks like I'm going back to car seat covers
You could band aid the situation
You should take it to carmax and see what they will offer you for it
Did you eat that morning? Sounds like a food intolerance.
It’s from years of shoving things in his ass
There’s just no resistance back there any more
That’s some light colored fabric but you should be fine. I had to scrub a shit stain out of a light tan cloth in my freshman roommate’s forerunner because I shit myself
in it on purpose to prove a point. It came out and looked ok or at least I thought so.
IBS and who knows what else is going on
Feel pregnant most mornings with how much I dry heave
What? What point?
I’ve posted the story in this thread but I had to shit post eating at the caf (which we both had nicknamed Colon Blow from the old SNL skit commercial) and told him so and he laughed and decided to just drive around campus instead of heading back to the dorm. So I shit myself in his passenger seat.
you wake up and have to puke?
I've never met you, but even I know to GTFO of the day whenever you say you have to go to the restroom.
Oh he thought I wouldn’t do it and I told him it’s going to happen and it just made him laugh even more. Even if he would have went straight back to the dorm it would have been close to me even making it to a bathroom anyways.
What'd he say afterwards?
That smells like shit
Well I hopped out and waddled into the dorm and went to the bathroom and cleaned up. He was pissed but I told him I’d clean it up. We were roommates and pledge brothers so it wasn’t a huge deal. It was a little more damage than what was posted because I really really had to shit and it was a huge one but it came out.
Sounds like pot withdrawal symptoms
All joking aside that’s how I realized I was physically addicted to alcohol. Fucking brutal.
fairly certain my issue is just food intolerance. I have to go within an hour of eating, but the biggest problem is that when it is time to go I only have about 10 minutes to find refuge. I’ve ditched more boxers than I care to admit.
I just want to salute all the pant shitters itt who have more courage to withstand life's twists and turns than I ever will.
I am in a terrific state of mental health, but can say with 100% confidence that if, or God forbid when, I shit my pants at work, I will kill myself. I'd take a cancer diagnosis and a sudden divorce in the same day over ever shitting my pants in public.
wrong approach. you should embrace that shit and keep living
You literally just said you'd kill yourself if you sharted.
I shit/sharted my pants when I was at a friend's house a couple of years ago. My stomach wasn't doing great to begin with and we were drinking a bunch. I didn't think it was that bad so I went into the bathroom to try to salvage the situation. Thought I was good until someone goes "what's that smell?" and I was out the door about 60 seconds later. I walked like 2 miles home with a shitty ass because I was drunk and didn't want to sit in an uber while smelling like shit.
I full on shit my pants twice on a drive for Birmingham to Tuscaloosa. Got out and cleaned up after the first. Second one I just kept on going
That sounds like a whole lotta chafing to go with the shit
Idkman I straight threw up blood the other day
Luckily we have assisted suicide specialist lechnerd