Jennifer Lopez is now 52 yrs old

lol thank you for blessing us with your return eathan to tell us about how you’re vaguely connected to some celebrity

 

Well I know she has a huge ass.

 

dammit shawn that was the joke

 

This but unironically

 

TIL eathan was lucky enough to be JLo’s errand boy bitch

 

It’s always better when it’s explained

 

I've read she's hard on the common people. One of those don't make eye contact with me bitches.

 

can’t wait for 10 months when eathan tells us how adam levine likes his steak.

 

Stick around, Eathan

 

I had lunch at a table adjacent to Adrian Brody at Chateau Marmont a few years back. Questlove was also dining a few tables over. AMA.

 

I caught Questlove’s drumstick ten years ago at a Roots show. I’m the best.

 

I’m calling bullshit. He didn’t mention this to me at lunch that day.

 

The day after this lunch, Eddie Murphy was having dinner at the table behind me at Boa Steakhouse. Jamie Foxx was also there and came over and they chatted for a few minutes. I’m legitimately not making this up, guys.

 

My high school girlfriend was somehow related to Levon Helm

if you would like my autograph pls contact me via PM

 

Also my wife’s cousin I’ve never met does/did play on LPGA tour

 

no one believes you have ever had a gf

 

That girlfriend’s name? Old Dixie.

 

You deserve a statue.

 

This board‘s propensity to “step on the joke” never ceases to amaze me.

 

This was back during the Marc Anthony days so he was taking the brunt of it - but yea, not worth it.

Think we had about 20 HR complaints between valet, style, servers, etc related to her last stay.

 

I'm still around - I just only post in the SoCal thread for people that are coming in town or live here and need recommendations on things to do.

 

Gubbs and mufflax both pm’ed me that they offer themselves as a sacrifice

 

RIP Mark Wheeler

 

Yes...me, unfortunately.

 

I mean

 

Lol

 

Once got a tour of West Coast Customs in LA a couple years ago. J Lo's car was there and the guy doing the tour gave me a weird look when I very seriously asked if I could smell the car seat?

 

so, you didn’t smell the seat....

 

I know this made me laugh right now...but I will think of this again, and I'll laugh just as I did now.

 

Jack Parkman needs to update the thread title

 

Asshole wouldn't let me

 

2009 I was at an Infiniti dealership in San Jose and the salesman wanted to get me interested in a used M45 by telling me it used to belong to Jeremy Roenick. I asked if I could smell the car seat, and I don't even like hockey

we bought a Lexus ES350 instead

 

My wife just showed me this picture and said “I hope I have that body at that age.” I said me too.

 

Does she have it at her current age?

 

I mean, who does? My wife has a great body for a mortal. She lacks the definition of JLo (obviously) but the curves are there.

 

Ruuuuude

As aforementioned - JLO is the epitome of hot/crazy graph.

 

Just cracked me up to imagine a younger woman thinking, “Hey, maybe my body will vastly improve as I get older.”

There’s a few freaks like J Lo and Beckinsale, but I wouldn’t hold my breath.

 

I know I’m in the bubble - but I’ve definitely seen plastic surgery with some pretty solid results.

It’s a heavy percentage of what most of my female staff talk about amongst each other.

 

If my wife had her current body at 50, I’d be ecstatic

 

I don't know if they are freaks... They just have all the time in the world to focus on eating healthy and working out. They get paid on body image. If our wives had the time and help i'm sure they would look amazing.

 

Personal chefs and trainers on call can do wonders. They still have to put in the work though.

 

Sure... What i'm saying is a ton of people have drive. They don't have the chef's, trainers, nanny's ect to get to put the work in like celebs.