Lawyer thread

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by Jax Teller, Apr 8, 2015.

  1. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    There always seems to be some conveniently omitted detail that explains these types of stories
     
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  2. Gallant Knight

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    yes this guy does 20/month for $400 per report and $500/hour testimony

    for a tried and true defense whore his deposition was largely awful and boring.
     
  3. Gallant Knight

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    just did this and overnighting a check for 30k

    this is v legit
     
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  4. RJF-GUMP

    RJF-GUMP Daubert Qualified in Cooler Thermodynamics
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    It's the only way to live
     
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  5. RJF-GUMP

    RJF-GUMP Daubert Qualified in Cooler Thermodynamics
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    If you want to be super cheap then bill it to the clients file and get your money back at disbursement time. If they get mad about it then just eat it. But I don't know of a single person that truly would rather wait for USPS instead of next day delivery when we're talking like $25 for the fee.
     
  6. Gallant Knight

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    yeah i will just eat it; we waive expenses on a ton of cases. just not worth the fight
     
  7. RJF-GUMP

    RJF-GUMP Daubert Qualified in Cooler Thermodynamics
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    I waive expenses all the time. And cut fees a good bit all the time
     
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  8. Gallant Knight

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    Look at how many of these fuckers allstate has in Dallas 46F2B701-165D-423D-8CA7-2B6E14CC1AA0.jpeg
     
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  9. Chumbolone

    Chumbolone Wigglin’ my toes on a mink rug…
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    If you get a small class action settlement is there every any reason to not accept it/wait?
     
  10. CF3234

    CF3234 Fan of: Bandwagons
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    Are you one of the consumers?

    Nah. The work is done. You aren’t getting shit on your own.
     
  11. Gallant Knight

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    and another 60k being overnighted. this is a game changer holy shit.
     
  12. Z

    Z Well-Known Member
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    Got a capital murder case set for trial in 2 weeks. My client has an offer to walk out of jail tomorrow for manslaughter on time served, no probation, no fine, nothing.

    He wants a trial because he wants to be exonerated. :facepalm:
     
  13. BUstang

    BUstang Lawyer

    Got a 10.5m verdict for two guys with unoperated backs and 9% second degree burn coverage.

    But they put 2% liability on the trial defendant. It sucks but we had a nice high/low in place. On to the next one!
     
  14. pez

    pez Competent
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    Needs to be posted here also. Out of amusement

     
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  15. Gallant Knight

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    not sure if i'm ready yet to tell yall about the scam i fell for.
     
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  16. bwi2

    bwi2 Not affiliated with BWI
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    Have dealt with a couple of those individuals over the years, always 25 years down the line following their release from prison for murder
     
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  17. Bricktop the white

    Bricktop the white Well-Known Member

    My boss came perilously close for the cashiers check "need someone to be local counsel" scam until i intervened. The scammer put a ton of effort into it.
     
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  18. Gallant Knight

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    how did that one work?
     
  19. Bricktop the white

    Bricktop the white Well-Known Member

    a guy calls up pretending to be a lawyer (or sometimes a business) seeking local counsel for some sort of seemingly minor issue. The offer to do whatever minor legal task comes with an astronomical premium relative to the work and payment is always offered by cashiers check. They always send the check for more than the promised amount as a "retainer" then ask for the remainder when you don't take it as a fee. The check is fake, they leave with whatever you sent them back and you get screwed.

    The one my boss fell for was a guy looking for a local lawyer to draft an injunction against a soon to-be-ex wife who was trying to steal a dog from a veterinarian in a rural county next to ours. Guy was posing as a real lawyer, had a spoofed email, knew the real lawyers bar number and enough legalese to make it look very real at first glance. Fell apart under scrutiny. My boss was fully prepared to accept the check no questions asked though.
     
  20. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    Oh come on...
     
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  21. colonel_forbin

    colonel_forbin Well-Known Member
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    ?
     
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  22. Gallant Knight

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    ding ding ding

    so guy reaches out to us, hires us, and then sends us an executed release and like 4 other documents. i get an email from the companies CFO and someone in HR saying hey we will be cutting the check. i send a notice of rep via email and call the number in their signature block and yeah it's just a normal ass dude being like i'm sorry this got lost in the shuffle we are going to overnight the check to you via fedex.

    ok sounds good.

    i get the check on a wednesday, it clears on a friday, and the dude is desperate for money and is like hey can you wire me 15k. i said i don't usually do this, but the check cleared and he was like i've been waiting for this since january and already spent a lot of it assuming i would get the $ like 5 months ago, so i tell him ok i will wire 15k and then put the remainder to him via fedex on monday. he's like ok thank you so much

    on monday i get notified by my bank that the check was returned. i call the number in the CFO's signature block and leave a nasty voicemail, and then i find the number for the HR person online and call and leave a nasty voicemail there too.

    about an hour later i get a call from that HR person as well as the general counsel and they're like ummm so yeah you're like the 250th lawyer who has fallen for this, we are in no way connected to this person, we have no idea what is going on, we've contacted the FBI and secret service and they're working on it etc etc etc

    so i notify my bank immediately and i guess they're able to notify the bank that i wired the 15k to that this was a scam. i guess that other bank thought something was off too because they froze the funds in that dude's account.

    today i get a wire back for 14,950, thank god

    so yeah that was pretty fun
     
  23. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    If it sounds too good to be true...
     
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  24. Gallant Knight

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    thought i learned a 15k lesson; thankfully it was a 50 dollar lesson
     
  25. Craig Pettis

    Craig Pettis Que será será motherfucker
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    this motherfucker is potentially facing execution and he won’t take a time served deal? What in the actual fuck
     
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  26. Z

    Z Well-Known Member
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    Chances the kid gets the death penalty are pretty close to zero.

    It’s a very defendable case. Co-Defendant (brother) has already been acquitted. But he seemingly has no care/comprehension of the risk/reward analysis here. If I was putting % on it, I’d say 30-40% chance he’s convicted and gets life without. But he’s “not taking any deal for something he didn’t do.”

    I’ve seen some clients makes really, really dumb decisions. He’s about to make what could be the dumbest I’ve ever seen.
     
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  27. Craig Pettis

    Craig Pettis Que será será motherfucker
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    I’ve had some bad ones, but this would take the cake by a mile.
     
  28. RJF-GUMP

    RJF-GUMP Daubert Qualified in Cooler Thermodynamics
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    Sammy Meatballs what ever happened to opposing counsel that withheld documents and you were going for sanctions? Felt like we got the build up but never the ending.
     
  29. Z

    Z Well-Known Member
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    Yeah, I used to do criminal work because I was first establishing my practice. I do these capital murder cases now as my good deed. This guy may change my whole outlook. He’s been a pretty good client for years as this has gone on. Now he’s just in another world.

    Tried to explain to him that people in the legal world always make bad decisions when they get emotional, but oh well. My August is going to suck.
     
  30. Sammy Meatballs

    Sammy Meatballs Pete Gelding
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    we are going on month 6 waiting for an order.
     
  31. The Hotch

    The Hotch Well-Known Member
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    I realize you have little time to do this unless judge agrees to continue/vacate trial but this should go to a settlement conference so a judge can tell him he’s being a fool and should take the plea. Sounds like some questionable stuff going on with the prosecution’s approach and case so they may be wise to go that route as well. I say all this knowing there is much more to the story that I’m unaware of.
     
  32. Z

    Z Well-Known Member
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    Well, I fully intend to put the settlement offer on the record, and that he was advised very strongly by both attorneys that it was beyond a doubt in his best interest to take that offer.

    Outside of that, this thing is steaming straight to trial. DA doesn't want to try it either, hence the offer, but he's got 2 dead bodies, and a very bad eyewitness/victim saying my guy did it, so he's not going to dismiss it. He's got a free shot.
     
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  33. The Hotch

    The Hotch Well-Known Member
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    Right I wouldn’t dismiss it either. Never suggested he should. Ethically questionable for them to roll with the death notice if there really is no chance the jury imposes it. That sort of stuff used as leverage far too much.
     
  34. Z

    Z Well-Known Member
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    Because of Covid and the difficulty we’ve had getting enough jurors, we’re doing a bifurcated jury. So this first batch is only doing guilt/innocence. If he gets a guilty verdict, I’ll be shocked if he pursues death. Would just be a waste of everybody’s time.
     
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  35. MORBO!

    MORBO! Hello, Tiny Man. I WILL DESTROY YOU!!!!
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    New client on the phone. He's breaking down crying. He can barely get words out. He has experienced "so much trauma" from this accident. I can practically hear the snot bubbles coming out of his face.

    His injuries? He broke his ring finger and had some bruising on his legs when a co-worker accidentally ran him over with a forklift.

    "I cannot believe I am alive right now. *sob* I'm just so scared that something is happening and I'm going to just drop dead any moment because of that accident."

    Then he said if I could not get him enough money to pay off his mortgage, he would seek representation elsewhere. I asked him if he owed less than $5,000 on his house, but that was apparently not the right thing to ask because he hung up on me.

    OH WELL
     
  36. Fudd

    Fudd Bail was like a pop fly just to bring my man home
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    I am 2/3 on motions this summer. Just got 13 of 13 items of prior bad act evidence excluded for use in both the prosecution's direct case and on cross.
     
  37. Gallant Knight

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    This Allstate lawyer got popped for $1,250,000 last week. Ouch

    prob giving his adjuster a call tomorrow morning
     
  38. CF3234

    CF3234 Fan of: Bandwagons
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    The fun things that have happened in the last 24 hours.

    Case #1. Been talking settlement with OC for a few weeks. Off the record we were on the same page for a settlement range. I explained to OC that there were two AOBs on the case. 1 for EMS and 1 for Mold. The EMS one needs to be paid, the Mold work is just an estimate and does not need to be paid. OC says great and goes to her client for authority.

    Fast forward to last week where I follow up about settlement, she responds that her partner passed away suddenly and the office is in obvious chaos. Of course I tell her not to worry and we will pick back up whenever she had time to breathe.

    Monday I get a call from her saying that her offer is 10k less than what we talked about a few weeks ago because she settled both AOB cases directly with the company last week. I then had to spend the next 30 minutes explaining to her that she just got fooled by an AOB company who passed along a mold estimate as an invocie that she agreed to pay. How much was that invoice? 10k.

    After explaining it to her multiple times she now realizes what happened but refuses to admit she messed up and agreed to pay someone for work that wasn't done. (Also, things were too chaotic to talk to me, but she had plenty of time to go commit some light malpractice with the AOB company).

    Instead of doing whatever she can to fix the issue, she passes it off to me. I get her a signed recission of the AOB from the client, Not good enough. An email from the AOB company confirming that the AOB was rescinded? Not good enough. She made me go get a signed release from the AOB company.

    Finally she's satisfied and just emailed me an offer that is still 5k less than where I need to be. I'm literally saving this lady from malpractice and she's making me jump through fucking hoops and still jerking me around with this settlement. Get me the full authority and get this case closed before it blows up in your face.

    5 p.m. Edit- she found that other 5k.


    Case #2.

    I had a CR depo scheduled for this morning. Carrier is a pain and continually witholds the FA photos of the property as privileged even though they submit them as trial exhibits 100% of the time when the case goes to trial. I got caught up yesterday and submitted my form request to produce the photos prior to the depo or put in writing that they won't use the photos at trial at 5:45. (It takes 5 total minutes to send me these photos and even if they send them right as the depo is starting I'm good to go without any issue.)

    Instead of just sending me the photos, at 7:45 I get a 3 paragraph lecture on professionalism, timeliness of requests, and how inappropriate it was for me to send a request so late in the evening when the depo starts at 10:00 the next day.

    Then his final paragraph. Oh btw, the CR that was supposed to appear left the company and will not be appearing tomorrow. This guy just spent 3 paragraphs lecturing me about profesionalism and then just slipped in that nobodys is appearing for the depo tomorrow when it's way too late to cancel my Court Reporter.

    The lack of self awareness is astounding. I'm wondering If I would have gotten an email prior to 10 am this morning if I hadn't sent my request in.
     
    #16338 CF3234, Aug 9, 2022
    Last edited: Aug 9, 2022
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  39. RJF-GUMP

    RJF-GUMP Daubert Qualified in Cooler Thermodynamics
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    Sometimes being a lawyer just sucks balls. I think that's what you are trying to say.
     
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  40. CF3234

    CF3234 Fan of: Bandwagons
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    It was actually a really good day. Two really solid settlements. But sometimes I wonder wtf other people are thinking.
     
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  41. Oranjello

    Oranjello Well-Known Member
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    Fuck ups or things outside you control happen, but lecturing/admonishing someone and then doing something admonishable would IMO be a faux pas worthy of a clap back. Can you do anything to Capt. Dickhead on record without seeking sanctions?
     
  42. Oranjello

    Oranjello Well-Known Member
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    Deep down, I think I yearn to be more of an asshole attorney than my practice area or [great mentor of a] boss allow me to be.

    :feelsbadman:
     
  43. CF3234

    CF3234 Fan of: Bandwagons
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    Normally I do OCs a solid when I get asked to reschedule a depo the day before. Even if I can’t get the cancellation in time, it’s only $100 that eventually gets paid by the carrier anyway when the case settles.

    for this one I took a CNA and have already requested new depo dates. A motion to compel is getting filed on Friday when I inevitably get new dates for some time in 2023 or he doesn’t respond at all.
     
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  44. RJF-GUMP

    RJF-GUMP Daubert Qualified in Cooler Thermodynamics
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    Opposing counsel wouldn't grant my law partner a continuance on a temporary custody hearing the next day when my partner’s best friend suddenly passed away and he had to fly to Houston for the funeral. OC happens to be running for a judge position. So we’re going all in on supporting another candidate . We hadnt gotten involved in the race but now we’re hosting a campaign event for the other candidate.
     
  45. Oranjello

    Oranjello Well-Known Member
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    Practicing law would be so much more enjoyable if there weren’t any clients
     
  46. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    :yolo:
    LFG
     
  47. El Tiburon

    El Tiburon Well-Known Member
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    <div style="width:100%;height:0;padding-bottom:56%;position:relative;"><iframe src="https://giphy.com/embed/g4IJKeVxo7h2g935ud" width="100%" height="100%" style="position:absolute" frameBorder="0" class="giphy-embed" allowFullScreen></iframe></div><p><a href="">via GIPHY</a></p>
     
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  48. CF3234

    CF3234 Fan of: Bandwagons
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    [​IMG]
     
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  49. Sammy Meatballs

    Sammy Meatballs Pete Gelding
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  50. BUstang

    BUstang Lawyer

    In an hourly commercial litigation trial. I don't know how you billable guys do it.