People still write Home Improvement fan fiction

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by racer, Oct 31, 2011.

  1. racer

    racer Better call Saul!
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    brolift and War Grundle like this.
  2. DeToxRox

    DeToxRox This guy is a fucking disgrace
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    Probably a Rutgers fan.
     
  3. Fancy

    Fancy thanks, i hate it
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    Probably AuB
     
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  4. WC

    WC Bad Company, till the day I die.
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    i'm not sure what fan fiction means, but i love me some home improvement
     
  5. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    What kind of google search brought you across this gem? Not judging; just interested.
     
  6. jorge

    jorge Founder of Post ITT if your team sucks
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    I noticed there was M rated iCarly fiction.
     
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  7. racer

    racer Better call Saul!
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    Autofill didn't work right in my google box and I got "Harry Mor" instead of "Harry Morgan" and it brought up that site.
     
  8. racer

    racer Better call Saul!
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    Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality
    To be specific
     
  9. tne

    tne Now tagging people with spaces in their name
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    Arsenal

     
  10. tne

    tne Now tagging people with spaces in their name
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    Arsenal

  11. tne

    tne Now tagging people with spaces in their name
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    Arsenal

    ugh letdown
     
  12. tne

    tne Now tagging people with spaces in their name
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    Arsenal

    I really need to leave this site

    A handsome Blaise Zabini captures Harry's attention and spirals change into Harry's life post-Hogwarts, post-Ginny. He's hot, honest, and Harry wants more than a one-night-stand loss of bisexual virginity. But can Blaise commit? And was he a Death Eater?

     
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  13. hudson

    hudson Oh, you know...stuff.
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    probably Rees'Thai noodlearm, Anklyosaurus, ksim14, kentuckywolverine, soulfly, especially fucking soulfly, and duc15.
     
  14. jimmy butler stan account

    jimmy butler stan account mpl92, bad (or sick) guy!
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    :chan:
     
  15. jorge

    jorge Founder of Post ITT if your team sucks
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    Penn State Nittany Lions

  16. keacali

    keacali Oklahoma Sooners, SF Giants
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    Lost
     
  17. AUB

    AUB My apple crumble is by far the most crumble-est
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    I write Digimon fan fiction c'mon son
     
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  18. Redav

    Redav My favorite meat is hotdog
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    I like hearing new stories about the Taylors.
     
  19. Redav

    Redav My favorite meat is hotdog
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  20. Whammy Business

    Whammy Business Well-Known Member
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    I don't know about fan fiction, but I would have given it to Jill Taylor. She's not hot, but there's something about her...
     
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  21. Moxin24

    Moxin24 Show me that smile
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    People wrote Sports Night fan fiction for a couple of years after it got canceled. It was surprisingly good.
     
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  22. Fusiontegra

    Fusiontegra My life is dope and I do dope shit.#SparedByThanos
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    I love how the Death Eater part is just casually thrown onto the end.
     
  23. Handcuffed

    Handcuffed TMB OG
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    laughed at "still"
     
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  24. racer

    racer Better call Saul!
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    I like how the show used to be pretty silly and light hearted for the most part, but this fan fiction is so dramatic and tackling tough social issues.
     
  25. Redav

    Redav My favorite meat is hotdog
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    Gotta raise Randy and Brad right bro
     
  26. ~ taylor ~

    ~ taylor ~ Boom... head shot.
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    Home Improvement tackled the tough social issues of the day - remember when Tim and Jill found out Brad was smoking pot?
     
  27. racer

    racer Better call Saul!
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    Not Mark though. Fuck that kid.
     
  28. bags

    bags America Fuck Yeah
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    someone check the boston legal fanfiction for me and let me know if Alan shot Denny yet
     
  29. NP13

    NP13 MC OG
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    hahaha
     
  30. bags

    bags America Fuck Yeah
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    lol, just checked it out, Hardcastle and McCormick is between Burn Notice and Monk for most popular. gatta love the 80's
     
  31. hamsterdam

    hamsterdam I wish I knew how to quit you.
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    This guy
     
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  32. Aaron Hernandez

    Aaron Hernandez LikeMyPostCampaign: https://bit.ly/2kKJpot
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    these write-ups are supposed to be series episodes? i assumed they were all going to be strange sexual fantasies.
     
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  33. jorge

    jorge Founder of Post ITT if your team sucks
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    Sorry not every story can have dick grabbing at sky bar in it.
     
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  34. Redav

    Redav My favorite meat is hotdog
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    Exactly, kid was such a I hated him.
     
    #34 Redav, Oct 31, 2011
    Last edited: Oct 21, 2019
  35. chet fire

    chet fire Man in Members Only jacket

    The moon spread a fever into the house at midnight, dripping its white blood against the shadows and lightening the cold bedroom where Tim and Jill were slowly dancing; listening to an old radio he had just finished repairing. 'Nights in White Satin' playing its ghostlike melody, drowsed with static and tender pain. Jill leaned against him helplessly, the cologne of his warm skin always reminding her of sawdust, of happiness.
    She could remember being happy only when he held her in his arms. Away from his embrace she drowned. Dancing during the middle of the night was something Tim had come to cherish, particularly because it soothed Jill from her nightmares and emptiness; he felt he could finally reach her, to bring her back to life by letting her rest against him and swaying her in the bright darkness. It too helped him forget his torments, his guilt.

    'Beauty I've always missed, with these eyes before. Just what the truth is, I can't say anymore…' tears glinted in Jill's eyes as she clung to Tim, the radio crackled and haunted, static hissing softly over the fluted blue music. She pressed herself deeper into his chest but could not feel his warmth anymore. The pain flourished, the memory of what she had lost hurt so terribly she could bleed without opening the wound, so sore it opened itself. Tim felt her grow heavy and tired in his arms, he dragged her with her feet skimming the carpet, wanting to hold her until the song was finished. He put his lips to her icy forehead and let her slump back into the bed.

    "Will you fix me a cup of tea?" she murmured, her throat clotted and aching, it hurt to even speak. Her hands were folded atop the pillows as she waited until Tim had left the room. With the radio silenced, she could hear his footsteps on the stairs, kicking over the laundry and books she left disarrayed there, too exhausted to clean them up. "I love you," she whispered to him, certain he could not hear, and rose from the bed, turning away from the darkened mirror into the bathroom.
    Downstairs the kettle burned in the dark as Tim waited by the stove, staring through the open door that led to the basement where his son had once slept. Jill had forgotten to shut it like always, he knew during the day she went to lay on Randy's bed and touch his things. She did the same in the bedroom belonging to Brad and Mark, going through their school work and old toys, breathing in the scent of their clothes, not wanting anything to stale. The house was littered in stained teacups, filthy plates of untouched food, laundry gathered upon the stairs and couch, and on the dining table photo books were strewn open, the pages worn by being turned endlessly with a sad finger.

    Tim wanted to ignore the mess, to keep believing nothing was wrong, that his wife would return to him someday as the glowing creature she once was. He spent his time at work and in the garage, refusing pity from Wilson and Al, oil leaking across his fingers and gritty solitude filled the hours. If Jill was not crying into the photo albums or trying to steady a cup of tea in her shivering hands, she was sedated from her pain in bed, a string of prescriptions that deadened the sickness only when she slept.

    A chill stung at his skin as he entered their bedroom, even with the porcelain cup blazing against his hand. An empty bed was shown to him in the darkness; he heard water running in the bath, peppering the floor. The tiles were slick as jewels, soaking his feet and threatening to pull him down. Tim saw her floating like a doll, the water bloomed with red, her wet arms drained and shining as they rested in a poppy-coloured sea. He sank to the floor and the sopping scarlet water collected in his palms, trickling through his fingers.

    'Just what you want to be, you will be in the end.'
     
    racer likes this.
  36. jorge

    jorge Founder of Post ITT if your team sucks
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    Is it bad i laffed?
     
  37. Principal McVicker

    Principal McVicker Not so New Member
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    9 year old me wanted to choke that bitch
     
  38. Redav

    Redav My favorite meat is hotdog
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    Hahaha, it's fucking Home Improvement people.
     
  39. chet fire

    chet fire Man in Members Only jacket

    It's amazing how much fan fiction there is out there about the characters dying.

    Seriously, 85% of "The Office" slash is about Pam dealing with the loss of Jim.
     
  40. Aaron Hernandez

    Aaron Hernandez LikeMyPostCampaign: https://bit.ly/2kKJpot
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    what? you guys read this stuff? is fan fiction a popular thing?
     
  41. jorge

    jorge Founder of Post ITT if your team sucks
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    Penn State Nittany Lions

    Top this. I dare you.
    With a fevered moan he arched against the rabbit, desperately wanting release. Daffy thrust against the despicable bunny rabbit– growling softly when his hips were held.

    "Bugs!" He whined softly, nipping the rabbit's ear. "Let me come. . ." he thrust against him.

    The rabbit chuckled at the display Daffy was providing, leaning close to the duck and kissing him softly. Daffy parted his beak quickly, wrapping his arms around the bunny rabbit's neck and pulling him close; their erections brushing up against each other. The aroused duck moaned softly at the action, repeating it.

    "More." He muttered against the kiss, back arching.

    Bugs complied, teasingly at first, kissing his way down to the bird's cock – giving the tip a kiss. He chuckled softly when Daffy bucked, holding his hips down as he took the weeping erection into his mouth . . .

    Daffy awoke with a sharp gasp – a thin sheen of sweat coating his slim frame. Oh gods . . .The tiny duck pushed his bangs back, shivering. A dream with that despicable rabbit. . . what a fucking nightmare.
     
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  42. NP13

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  43. chet fire

    chet fire Man in Members Only jacket

    Jorge just killed my soul.
     
  44. chet fire

    chet fire Man in Members Only jacket

    Sunlight was steadily filtering into the bedroom as he stood there, waiting. But she had not, and would not, budge.
    Her right hand was placed gently on her tweed skirt; she was absorbed in staring at the silver hand-hewn wedding band that bedecked the ring finger she had.
    "Mattie? You comin'?" He prodded gently.

    She raised her dark stare and he flashed her an impeccable grin that he reserved for special occasions. LaBoeuf hadn't realized that the morning after their wedding would be warranted as yet another 'special occasion'.

    Her eyes narrowed and she shook her head. Her unruly locks swayed, as she had yet put her hair up in any sort of fashion.

    Unruly hair that might have been attributed to how he had manhandled it the prior evening, along with a few -ahem- other items.

    "No."

    "You can't stay in here for eternity. You'll starve." Thoroughly he enjoyed this, their camaraderie. The banter between them that stood as a guise for the desire
    they craved from each other. As he should, undoubtedly. Since a lifetime of it awaited him.

    Her gaze was steady. "Eternity, Mr. LaBoeuf? In a boardhouse bedroom? Truly you know me better than to throw such ill-mannered exemplifications my way.
    Eternity? No. For as long as I damn well please? Why, yes."

    Her sudden and sharp curse made him chuckle, and she threw him a glare.

    "May I ask to why all the fuss?"

    Were all young brides this queer? He could only imagine whatever else nonsensical lay before him. Horsefeathers, it was. It also didn't help matters much that his extensive knowledge of young brides (and the female species, to be perfectly honest) was fairly new and limited.

    She had not answered him yet.

    He sighed.

    LaBoeuf could hear and smell the bacon frying just beyond the first floor.

    Mrs. Hemsworth, the board house keeper didn't look too kindly on those who were tardy to breakfast. But then again, Mrs. Hemsworth had not yet met the iron will of a certain Mattie Ross. He halted and corrected himself. LaBoeuf.

    The surname now counted for two.

    "They'll know." Mattie lowered her voice to just above a whisper. And before he could ask, she finished with: "They'll know what we have been doin' in here." She
    blushed.

    He laughed.

    "We have more than a day's ride to Yell County. I insist you gain your bearings, Mrs. LaBoeuf." And with that his spurs against the floorboards and a final hearty chuckle were all that could be heard.
     
  45. Redav

    Redav My favorite meat is hotdog
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    Wow
     
  46. racer

    racer Better call Saul!
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    :ohholyfuck:
     
  47. Pile Driving Miss Daisy

    Pile Driving Miss Daisy It angries up the blood
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    Oh jesus

    Bobby didn't understand what he was being punished for.
    He'd been friends with Joseph since before he was old enough to even consider that maybe boys weren't supposed to kiss other boys. He'd been friends with Joseph long before he'd known Connie, before he'd ever thought that she looked good in a skirt and that maybe he'd like to hold her hand sometime.
    What was more, his father, Hank Hill, had known Joseph as long as he'd been Bobbys father. He'd watched Joseph grow up, he was best friends with Joseph's father and he'd never even liked Connie's parents, especially Connie's dad. So what was the big deal?
    Bobby couldn't ask, though, because Hank had shoved him into his room and slammed the door. So instead he sat on his bed beside the window and gazed out at the yard, head in his hand. He wondered if, right now, Joseph was getting a similar treatment from his dad. But Mr. Gribble usually let Joseph do whatever he liked – grow his hair out to his shoulders, stay out past curfew, even start smoking. Bobby wondered if kissing a boy was just one more thing his father would over-look or if maybe this time it'd be too much. Maybe this was what would make Mr. Gribble give Joseph the talking to that Hank had always said he'd needed.
    Bobby sure hoped not.

    BUWAHHAHA BOBBEH!
     
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  48. Principal McVicker

    Principal McVicker Not so New Member
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    my childhood has been raped
     
  49. racer

    racer Better call Saul!
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    I always had Bobby Tagged as a queer.
     
  50. racer

    racer Better call Saul!
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    New shit posted. Gotta keep up with it. Tim has ED and Jill's vag is crusty and dry. But they're getting through it. Together.

    Not sure if that's in a story or not, but I imagine it might be,