pet monkey escapes crate; chills in ikea parking lot with super sweet coat on

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by 34, Dec 10, 2012.

  1. skattles

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  2. Coldhands

    Coldhands You don't know snakes from dildos about that.

    Where can I find a hi-res anteater-only version of this? I'd google, but my work comp is in the middle of a death rattle.
  3. steamengine

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    Best I can find

  5. Coldhands

    Coldhands You don't know snakes from dildos about that.

    :bow: 20 or so likes sent your way. I appreciate it.
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  7. pearl

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    SWIMFAN Waiting for 2016: New President, New Coach

    'IKEA monkey' to celebrate Christmas behind bars of animal sanctuary

    Darwin caused a frenzy as it wandered around the parking lot of a Toronto-area Ikea store (Reuters)

    The monkey who burst to international fame after being seen ambling around a Toronto IKEA parking lot in a faux-sheepskin coat will not be celebrating Christmas at home this year: A judge has ruled that Darwin must remain at an animal sanctuary.
    Monkeys may not be kept as pets, according to Toronto law. After animal control officers captured the monkey, it was transferred to a sanctuary near Oshawa, outside Toronto, Reuters reported.
    Owner Yasmin Nakhuda, a real estate lawyer, went to court, eager to try regain custody of her beloved pet. Nakhuda was disappointed to learn that her 7-month-old money would not be allowed home for the holidays when a judge ordered that the animal will remain in the sanctuary until at least next month.
    In an earlier interview, she claimed she had been threatened with criminal charges if she did not cooperate and turn over the animal.
    Nakhuda told local media that she had prepared a Santa’s suit costume for her pet for Christmas and New Year. She also posted a video featuring her and the clever monkey brushing their teeth together before bed.
    Other videos showed her doting on the animal, buying it fashionable clothes and teaching it to behave.
    Her next court hearing is scheduled for January. If her custody is restored, Nakhuda said she plans to move to a cottage town outside Toronto, one which has no specific ban on keeping monkeys as pets.
    Darwin the monkey became an Internet sensation earlier this month after it escaped from an animal crate in Nakhuda’s car while she was shopping at an IKEA store. The ape was wearing a sheepskin coat and a diaper when it was videotaped and photographed by shocked store visitors. Videos of the monkey were soon posted on YouTube, while pictures of it flooded socials networks like Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.
  9. CC

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  10. 34

    34 just gonna send it
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    this story honestly made 2012 for me

    the mayans could have been right and i would have died a happy man
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  11. chet fire

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  12. StandUpDrunk

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  13. gritzy

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    it lives
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  14. Corky Bucek

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  15. gritzy

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    best thread in TMB history, I will not be ashamed
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  16. Joshuam2107

    Joshuam2107 SUH DUDE

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  17. MORBO!

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    Hood rich.
  18. Joey Freshwater

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    One of the best threads on all of the Internet.
  19. TheChatch

    TheChatch Big Paws On A Puppy.
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    Little guy just can't stay out of the mix...

    Monkey steals a bus and crashes it into two parked vehicles
    One of the most bizarre traffic accidents of the year has taken place in northern India, where a monkey stole and crashed a bus.

    The monkey managed to start the engine of the bus while the driver was taking a nap - and even got it moving.

    The bus hit two other vehicles parked in the garage in Bareilly, Uttar Pradesh state, before the driver was able to regain control.

    Woupsie! The monkey climbed into the parked bus while the driver was asleep in the back, having left the key in the ignition, and managed to start the engine

    The chicle had been parked at the local bus station between routes, and the conductor had stepped off for a break.

    The driver, seizing an opportunity for a nap, and stretched out in the back, leaving the keys in the ignition.

    As the driver dozed off, one of Bareilly's many street-monkeys climbed in and got behind the wheel.

    Somehow, the simian managed to turn the key and start the engine, Times of India reports.

    This woke the driver, who rushed to the front, but when he shoo-ed the monkey out of the way, the animal accidentally put the bus in second gear.

    Monkey business! As the driver was shoo-ing it from the seat, the animal somehow put the bus in second gear, forcing bystanders to flee the moving vehicle as it crashed into two other buses

    As the monkey jumped out of the bus, it started rolling, and bystanders were forced to jump out of the way.

    'The driver managed to regain control of the bus but not before it hit two other parked buses,' local public transport manager SK Sharma told Times of India.

    'Monkeys have become a regular menace at bus stations and workshops, where they often fiddle with vehicles undergoing repair. They have also damaged CCTV cameras at stations.

    'Three years we were able to get rid of them the help of municipal authorities to get rid of them but they have returned.'
    WolverineJack likes this.
  20. Barves2125

    Barves2125 "Ready to drive the Ferarri" - Reuben Foster
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    January 8, 2016 by CLASH MEDIA
    Darwin the “Ikea Monkey” will be getting a new home in a Sunderland, ON animal sanctuary, thanks to comedian Ricky Gervais.

    Darwin was made famous after he was found wearing a coat wandering outside a Toronto Ikea store.

    Ricky Gervais at The Golden Globes

    A guitar was signed and donated to the sanctuary by the outspoken Gervais and is set to be auctioned off on eBay. The funds from the guitar will go to building the new enclosure for Darwin and his two new monkey roommates, Cody and Pugsley.

    The guitar was used in the filming of the new comedy, Special Correspondents in which Gervais wrote, directed and stars. The movie was filmed in Toronto and is set to be released in April on Netflix.

    Darwin has been a resident of the Story Book Farm Primate Sanctuary for three years since being placed there after the Ikea incident went viral.
    bcuga, Beeds07, VictorJ24 and 3 others like this.
  21. BrickTamland

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    Goddamn this thread was fantastic.

    Thought of it when I saw this on reddit:

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  22. TAS

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  23. WC

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  24. a.tramp

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  25. TAS

    TAS 20_ _ TMB Poster of the Year

    You gotta relax your eyes
  26. Iron Mickey

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    hahaha like some 90s magic eye shit
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  27. Celemo

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  28. WC

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  29. BMR

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  30. Duck70

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    Is that Kimye's kid?
  31. three stacks

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    are you calling a mixed race baby a monkey
  32. Duck70

    Duck70 Let's just do it and be legends, man
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    It was more the super sweet jacket, the dapper glasses and the celeb look/walk
  33. Randy Bobandi

    Randy Bobandi Well-Known Member
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    Would’ve bet the house that a.tramp was bumping this.
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  34. Gunners

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    Happy anniversary, sweet monkey
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  35. wes tegg

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    Thread is 5 today.
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  36. TC

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  37. jokewood

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  38. TheFreak55

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  39. Boo MFer!

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  40. TAS

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  41. 941Gator

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    Did they ever get his backstory? Was he just a stockbroker that had too much booze or what.
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  43. marcus

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  44. Beeds07

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