Just saying when my wife was pregnant she’d do things like forget to take her other earring out and then claimed it was lost, or misplaced her wedding ring for like a week bc her hands were swelling or she was putting lotion on
We did this too up until the year we got married and then just combined everything a few months prior to the wedding at the start of the year. Seems like a reasonable approach if you're living together and not married yet. Couples exchanging Venmos for coffee is fucking insane.
It's for "goods and services" not "friends and family" payments. Just have to be careful of what box you check or profile is set up I guess.
It was the entire morning. I was half an hour late to work this morning helping and she spent the entire morning searching until she found it. she was on the way to the vet for an X Ray when she pulled it out of her purse.
Not necessarily stupid but my wife will come up with unique reasons to order out for dinner. Tonight's reason is to celebrate Acuna coming back.
“Hey honey my online boyfriends love how you find reasons to order food.” “Sounds like a great reason to get Applebees tonight.”
We’ve been doing the worlds longest renovation it feels like. First week of March we ripped out the floors, kitchen, etc. Finally last week the floors were finished and our cabinet guy could get the final measurements and finish building. We still have no kitchen, the garage is like a maze of boxes but it’s almost over. The end is somewhat near. So how does my wife want to celebrate? By having people over this weekend when we still have no god damn kitchen yet and the only fridge is in the land of boxes and appliances. Totally normal thing to do
We’re at our city’s soccer fields 4/5 days a week and I’ve just been eating really sad fucking dinners there. I’ve never wanted to cook my own food so bad in my life
When we did our kitchen remo, we found a place that sold pre-made meals. You just need a frig and a microwave. Quality was good, ease was perfect, and cost was not terrible. Their model was for quick meals that fit healthy diets (keto, paloe, whole30) so you were not just ingesting trash while on the go.
Same. My wife bought 6 remotes to have backups when she loses them. I pulled her clothes out of the dryer and found airpod pros. Car keys…her computer…phone (which also is infrequently charged, killing the chance of using find my iPhone). It goes on.
My wife fell at roller derby practice and landed on her wheel and now had a wheel shaped bruise on her lady bits. Last year she did the same thing on her taint.
Wife is currently mad at me because today her cousin found a beach house for rent this weekend 4 hours from us for a good deal and she wants to go with them, but little man has his soccer game on Saturday and she said she would 'let him decide' It's the biggest match up of the year for his little soccer league, his best friend plays on the only other undefeated team who they are playing. And she is mad because I won't try to convince him to skip it. Not even approaching the "you committed to this, you are gunna be there" angle. She is just fly by the seat of your pants upset.
Wife channeled a rookie of the year arm and absolutely rocketed one of these balls directly at my face as I was turning around. Caught me right on the orbital bone. My condition is doubtful for game 3.
Yeah it must have caught me perfectly, left a mark. And again I have no idea how/why she threw it so hard. I probably cheated on her in her dream the night before or something.
One time I dropped an empty water bottle. Instinctively tried to kick it up with bare foot and guess it also hit perfectly, fractured a tiny bone somehow
Me: what are you mad about? Her: nothing Me: what are you mad about? Her: nothing Me: what are you mad about? Her: fine…I’m disappointed I didn’t get anything special for breakfast on Mother’s Day. I sort of wanted a chocolate croissant and coffee from <some place she likes> Me: But when we talked earlier this week, you said you just wanted some stuff from <another place she likes> for dinner Her: I know. I was hoping you’d do something for breakfast too. Me: I don’t want to do this on Mother’s Day, but are you serious right now?
“I didn’t want to have to tell you what I wanted, I wanted you to want to know it already and want to do it”
You sir, fell on for one of the classic blunders. The greatest is getting involved in a land war in Asia, but only slightly more than “not assuming your partner wants more than she asks for for Mothers Day”
I’m no dummy (lol). She’s already getting more than she asked for (which isn’t much). It’s just very out of character to pull the “read my mind” shit (no it’s not).
My wife got some leopard print pajama shorts that my kid picked out from target. Had a baby on my arm, so it was wrapped by stuffing it in a tumbler that was nearby. P good mother's day if you ask me
My wife is getting matching (or not if she chooses) Frisco Rough Rider t-shirt with Levi at the baseball game she requested to go to.