Stupid shit your wife/girlfriend does...

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by bertwing, May 16, 2016.

  1. MLS

    MLS Well-Known Member
    Tampa Bay BuccaneersMississippi Rebels

    Obviously it depends on what she does for a living but hair, skincare, exercise expense I've basically just assumed is going to be equivalent to another house payment for most of my adult life
     
    BayouMafia, Dump, PAHokie and 3 others like this.
  2. jbr

    jbr Well-Hung Member
    Donor TMB OG

    Maybe not a house payment, but she is probably pushing $1k/month between all that stuff. I’m (mostly) fine with it, but feigning indignation on TMB for likes is more my speed.

    edit: The majority of these expenses are exercise related…family gym membership for year round pool access, yoga studio, barre classes, etc.
     
    #17102 jbr, Jan 24, 2023
    Last edited: Jan 24, 2023
  3. Doc Louis

    Doc Louis Well-Known Member
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    Maybe they like putting together puzzles? Like one of those 2000 piece ones?
     
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  4. beerme

    beerme Well-Known Member
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    .
     
    #17104 beerme, Jan 24, 2023
    Last edited: Jan 20, 2024
  5. MLS

    MLS Well-Known Member
    Tampa Bay BuccaneersMississippi Rebels

    Yea I'm blowing through that budget probably by the 15th of the month but obviously I have to prep like I'm going to a photoshoot every day for work

    We do save on the Eathan haircut budget though by me having to cut his hair because it costs $45 plus tip to get a basic 1 grade buzz where we live. It's like $11 in JH.
     
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  6. SpartanGA

    SpartanGA Well-Known Member
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    this is far from the norm. Keep her.
     
  7. El Tiburon

    El Tiburon Well-Known Member
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    Another satisfied Flobee customer!
     
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  8. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    I could be, depends on the benefits
     
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  9. jbr

    jbr Well-Hung Member
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    $219 all in (and the hair looks 98% the same as it did yesterday). I got off easy today.
     
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  10. Rabid

    Rabid Fan of: DQ Treats
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    Minnesota Golden Gophers

  11. Capstone 88

    Capstone 88 Going hard in the paint
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    So she got spoofed by a fake call but somehow figured out how to use Bitcoin before mentioning it to her husband?
     
  12. NP13

    NP13 MC OG
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    I mean, there's people that go buy gift cards and shit, while still talking on the phone with the scammers.

    In short, people are stupid.
     
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  13. NineteenNine

    NineteenNine Divers are, in fact, wankers. It's science.
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    I love trying to keep those people on the phone for as long as possible. My personal record is 22 minutes.
     
  14. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby Daddy’s #1 Candy Baby
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    A lot of cities are moving to no cash band but that doesn’t mean they won’t accept bitcoin
     
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  15. Imurhuckleberry

    Imurhuckleberry Avid spectator of windmill warriors
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    Sister in law got got like this too. They had my ex at the bank before the bank manager stopped her. They are pretty good at targeting and researching beforehand. They spoofed the fbi number and knew places we had been over the last year (probably from Social). I’ve had one calling all my friends and family “about a legal matter” for a bit now. They are good at what they do and I hope they die painfully.
     
    #17115 Imurhuckleberry, Jan 25, 2023
    Last edited: Jan 25, 2023
    One Two, bigred77 and Rabid like this.
  16. CUgator

    CUgator Well-Known Member
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    upload_2023-1-29_11-15-31.jpeg

    Wife bought 3 of these hideous pillows for $125 each because we “needed a new look”. They are non refundable. If you don’t hear from me, I might be in jail.
     
  17. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    Lmao this has to be a money laundering operation you got screwed.
     
  18. Arrec Bardwin

    Arrec Bardwin La Araña Discoteca
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    I’ve seen worse pillows but gaddam $125 a pop is a crime.
     
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  19. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    I was all pissed when my wife went and spent like $50 a pillow for couch pillows that just immediately end up either on the floor or the other end of the couch because they aren't comfortable sit or lean on
     
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  20. NineteenNine

    NineteenNine Divers are, in fact, wankers. It's science.
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    My wife buys usable pillows on the cheap at TJMaxx. AMA.
     
  21. Skiddly

    Skiddly Well-Known Member
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    Wife has been complaining that our bedroom is so much colder than the rest of the house.

    Upon closer inspection she had a pillow covering the supply vent.

    "I didn't realize that would stop the heat from getting into our room"

    [​IMG]
     
  22. Rabid

    Rabid Fan of: DQ Treats
    Donor TMB OG
    Minnesota Golden Gophers

    This reminds me of how my wife doesn’t understand how to use the HVAC in the car. It’s literally just a thermostat where you set the temp. It blows my mind how it’s too complex for her.
     
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  23. EagleDuck

    EagleDuck Well-Known Member
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    My wife refuses to believe that turning the temp to max heat doesn't heat the car any faster than if she just chose a temp that she finds comfortable. Then, when she forgets that she has it at full heat, she gets too warm and just closes her vents thinking that will fix it.
     
  24. HuskerInMiami

    HuskerInMiami Well-Known Member
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    Mine refuses to use the auto-temp setting. She gets in the car and will turn the air on max, then turn it lower. Whenever I set it to Auto, so gets upset and says it doesn't work, "And your mom agrees with me!", because it blows the air too fast at first while it's trying to get the temp corrected.
     
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  25. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    I think I may be a woman. I am always either too hot or too cold. Never comfortable.
     
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  26. Taffy

    Taffy Token Brit poster
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  27. Baron

    Baron Well-Known Member
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    Normally in the winter I have the fan set to the windshield and legs. If my wife starts to get too hot, she will just change the setting to the legs.
     
    IV, Simon Templar and Dump like this.
  28. SpartanGA

    SpartanGA Well-Known Member
    Donor TMB OG
    Michigan State Spartans

    It drives me crazy. Just set the temp to what you want. Let the computer do its work. And few understand that MAX is purely recirculating interior air vs. pulling from outside. Only helpful in summer when the inside is already cool, or you are driving through dust or something.
     
    HuskerInMiami likes this.
  29. WhiskeyDelta

    WhiskeyDelta Well-Known Member
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    First thing I thought of, thanks. “You have to give it something to aim for”
     
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  30. Whammy Business

    Whammy Business Well-Known Member
    Donor

    Anytime my girlfriend is driving it's either max cold or max heat depending on the weather. The inside of the car sounds like a fucking wind tunnel. I can't stand it.
     
    #17130 Whammy Business, Jan 31, 2023
    Last edited: Jan 31, 2023
  31. CF3234

    CF3234 Fan of: Bandwagons
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    This hits the feel hard.

    My wife will ONLY use fan power setting. Too warm, turns it up, to cold, turns it down. Nevermind that 75 degree air will be 75 degree air no matter how hard the fan is blowing.
     
  32. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    I constantly try and sneak in a push of the "auto" button on the ac when I'm driving the wife's car
    Inevitably she will grab the fan dial at some point and turn it up or down
     
  33. Russellin4885

    Russellin4885 Well-Known Member
    Donor
    North Carolina State Wolfpack

    Never knew this was just a universal female issue. There has never been once that I have gotten into my wives car and the dial be on auto, even though I have explained it to her a million times.
     
    gopack2104 and Rabid like this.
  34. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
    Donor
    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    I don’t use the auto setting on my car. Never let the robots win
     
  35. OZ2

    OZ2 Well-Known Member

    It’s the Targetization or HGTVing that’s helped lead to this shit. When moving back to Nebraska from Oregon we have stayed in my parents-in-laws old house (they built a new one on farmland they grew up on). For my wife’s older sisters wedding they threw the wedding shower there because her twin didn’t want it at her house. As a result, for appearances sake, she had them redo the 1/2 bathroom. (Yes, I realize how sad that is).

    Anyway, I paint and I’ve had this little abstract painting I’ve stuck in EVERY bathroom I pee the most in since college. When I get bored I turn it in another direction because it’s kind of interesting to look at. It also is colorful so it legit looks kind of cool. Unpacking and I see this ‘live, laugh, love’ or some garbage quote sign in the bathroom on the floating shelf next to this small, fake plant.

    I replace the sign with my 10”10” painting. My wife doesn’t care because she thinks it looks way better and hates those stupid house decorations too.

    Guess who noticed and made a huge deal about it the first time visiting? Her older sister. I could only laugh because she hired an interior designer when they finished building their house & I’ve been commissioned by people to paint in my free time.
     
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  36. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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    Unless I have kids riding with me, my car has 2 climate settings: a/c and off.
     
    bigred77 likes this.
  37. infected donkey

    infected donkey Arkansas Razorbacks
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    Auto 98% of the time, unless for some reason i need to run the defrost because of the conditions (humid and fogging up or cold and fogging up and auto just goes robot stupid.)
     
    SpartanGA likes this.
  38. infected donkey

    infected donkey Arkansas Razorbacks
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    Wife on the other hand has to have fan on 100 or 0, no in between.
     
  39. goheels10

    goheels10 Well-Known Member
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    North Carolina TarheelsCleveland BrownsUnited States Men's National Soccer Team

    I often come here to vent about something my wife did/said.

    I'm here today to do the opposite, to praise her for something she enlightened me to.

    Never ever split an English muffin with a knife. Use a fork to poke into the sides and then pull it apart to increase the nooks and crannies. making egg sandwiches for dinner tonight... thats why this comes to mind.
     
  40. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    Or buy presliced
     
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  41. goheels10

    goheels10 Well-Known Member
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    nope. buy the ones that come whole and split them with a fork.

    next level
     
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  42. NineteenNine

    NineteenNine Divers are, in fact, wankers. It's science.
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    What psycho slices a English muffin?
     
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  43. Funshot Residue

    Funshot Residue Mammoth Stabber
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    Jack the Ripper did a few, back in the day.
     
  44. CF3234

    CF3234 Fan of: Bandwagons
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    Need to see this painting
     
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  45. Baron

    Baron Well-Known Member
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  46. letan

    letan Just looking for the gator board
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    I got married last year so I’m doing our taxes together for the first time. Get to the end and since it’s the first time I’m submitting them it asks me for her prior year adjusted gross income. I have her pull it up and curiously it’s only $28k.

    I immediately realize she fucked them up. She switched jobs last year and should have entered two W2s, only entered the first one. ‘Oh well why didn’t TurboTax say anything to me’ and ‘I thought my refund last year was pretty high’.

    We now owe the IRS money. Sweet. Thankfully it’s not a lot.
     
  47. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    Just committing some tax fraud as a fun treat
     
  48. Jimmy the Saint

    Jimmy the Saint The future is a benevolent black hole
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    :roll:

    It’s surprising the IRS didn’t send her a nasty gram. That’s a pretty obvious matching error.
     
    #17148 Jimmy the Saint, Feb 4, 2023
    Last edited: Feb 4, 2023
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  49. NineteenNine

    NineteenNine Divers are, in fact, wankers. It's science.
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    Haven’t you heard? They’re defunding the IRS.
     
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  50. Jimmy the Saint

    Jimmy the Saint The future is a benevolent black hole
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    Not the computers, just the agents with guns iirc.