Stupid shit your wife/girlfriend does...

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by bertwing, May 16, 2016.

  1. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Nonsense, fire away
     
    shawnoc, One Two, Clemson327 and 11 others like this.
  2. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Ceviche time it is!!

    I've definitely had this same argument - with the ex not with MLS.

    "What is the worst case scenario here? You don't finish your amount? I will knock out that remainder right now if it ends this discussion."
     
  3. The Hebrew Husker

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    This is how my GF responds to like 96% of the things I say. Usually I’ll respond with an “oh..weird…” or ask if she thinks I’m saying stuff for my own entertainment.
     
    One Two, bigred77 and Dump like this.
  4. The Hebrew Husker

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    I’ve mostly just accepted the fact that my GF is the messiest human alive plus has ADHD so the odds a task gets fully completed are very low.

    I’ll still randomly manage to get surprised though. Earlier she dumped out a bunch of Powerade bottles to throw away (good job) but didn’t rinse the sink out. So now there’s just a bunch of random blue stains in the sink that won’t rinse off.
     
  5. Homo Erectus

    Homo Erectus Upstanding Citizen
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    How's her personal hygiene?
     
    bigred77 likes this.
  6. The Hebrew Husker

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    The amount of shipments from Ulta, Sephora, and wherever else would suggest it is top tier!
     
    One Two, DuffandMuff, Taffy and 3 others like this.
  7. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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    You don't often see one poster ask another if their girlfriend has any off smells or tastes. You can tell football is almost back.
     
  8. The Hebrew Husker

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    I considered a sarcastic response but decided to clear her name in the off chance she stops referring to this place as my “chat room” and figures out the actual website and finds me.
     
  9. TimJimothy

    TimJimothy Well-Known Member
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    a/s/l?
     
    Hatfield, Lip, PAHokie and 6 others like this.
  10. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    I don't know if this is necessarily stupid but MLS getting hit with the song by bigred77 in the duff thread just now is the hardest I've laughed in a while.

    She was literally getting ready for bed and then had to go pour a shot.
     
  11. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Wife has - thus far - placed at least 6 Ole Miss bets.... that I'm aware of in a game that I've very openly said is a trap game.

    Gonna be a fun day.
     
  12. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    I will never win an argument again.
     
  13. devine

    devine hi, i am user devine
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    Haha wow how dumb!
     
  14. IHHH

    IHHH Well-Known Member
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    let me take that like back real quick
     
  15. beerme

    beerme Well-Known Member
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    It’s 12:30AM and I’m about to fall asleep and my wife just texted me from bed “ I forgot to blow up balloons and make a sign” (for our sons first day of preschool tomorrow, didn’t do that the last two years for him)… I’m not taking the bait
     
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  16. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Also, I would have hated that as a kid. I would just scrap it - but I don't have kids so take that advice with heavy grain of slaw.
     
  17. One Two

    One Two Hot Dog Vibes
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    Excellent typo
     
  18. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    It's deliberate, I honestly can't think of where I picked that phrase up. Could easily be TMB.
     
    One Two likes this.
  19. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    I just did a brief straw sample of the household and the consensus is absolutely don't do it - and that's from two females that love kids.
     
    Dump likes this.
  20. One Two

    One Two Hot Dog Vibes
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    wes tegg and Eathan Edwards like this.
  21. football501

    football501 I once ate a Twix with the wrapper on it
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    [​IMG]

    Not enough space in the condo I guess?
     
  22. beerme

    beerme Well-Known Member
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    I’m not against it, we’ve done it for his birthday before. its the 12:30am request when I had to be up in 6 hours not really necessary considering we’ve never done it for the first day of school before
     
    Fecta23 likes this.
  23. tylerdolphin

    tylerdolphin My spoon is too big
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  24. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    They try their damndest - just can't seem to get each other pregnant.
     
  25. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Mind you, it's 5:10am here.

    "Remember we have to make sure our visas and passports are good because we have to go to Riyadh in like 6 weeks"

    What? No, I don't remotely remember us agreeing to this.

    I feel like that's a pretty big commitment to hit someone with to start the day.
     
    PAHokie, Keef, Lip and 7 others like this.
  26. Cabs

    Cabs eatin' fried okra with Oprah
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    Lol man what an idiot!
     
  27. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Look, if I hammered I may forget some details. I would remember a scheduled fucking trip to Saudi being discussed.
     
  28. Simon Templar

    Simon Templar Well-Known Member
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    I sure hope you aren’t slumming it and flying commercial.
     
  29. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    I have no fucking clue - had no part in setting any of this up.

    Is this flight being paid for? Am I on the hook for this? I have nothing.

    I know we have a place to stay but that's it.
     
  30. Simon Templar

    Simon Templar Well-Known Member
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    All nonessential things for an overseas trip. I don’t see the issue tbh.
     
  31. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    You don't see an issue taking a throuple to Saudi Arabia - with zero notice?

    They're not idiots they know the drill - but nonetheless its ridiculous.
     
    PAHokie, Keef, Rabid and 2 others like this.
  32. Simon Templar

    Simon Templar Well-Known Member
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    Maybe my sarcasm was not apparent enough.
     
  33. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Yea, that's on me. Still reeling from this asinine birthday that we've now agreed to attend so probably went over my head.
     
  34. Simon Templar

    Simon Templar Well-Known Member
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    It’s early and you were hit with a doozy this morning. No shame in the game.
     
    Dump and Eathan Edwards like this.
  35. WhiskeyDelta

    WhiskeyDelta Well-Known Member
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    Enjoy getting waited on by slaves friendly immigrants from Central Asia!
     
    Keef, Swannee, Dump and 1 other person like this.
  36. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    I think the whole trip will likely be depressing to see how things are run there - also going with two females is probably going to add to that.

    He is one of my and MLS 's best friends though - so we're only going there to see him.
     
    Dump likes this.
  37. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    Wait
    Birthday in Saudi, yall are attending........

    Who's gunna watch the lion?
     
    NineteenNine likes this.
  38. WhiskeyDelta

    WhiskeyDelta Well-Known Member
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    Pro - generally more accepting of polygamy/polyamory (in very specific ways)

    Con - literally everything else
     
    PAHokie, Keef, Brocephus and 2 others like this.
  39. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    He's back in Riyadh - MLS will obviously spend time with him when we get out there as she thinks he's a damn house cat at this point.
     
    Dump and bigred77 like this.
  40. Baron

    Baron Well-Known Member
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    So are they up to date or not?
     
    Dump, One Two, bigred77 and 1 other person like this.
  41. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Yea - we're going. Pack your Burkas MLS.

    I was never told about this until this morning. I completely thought she was fucking with me so I called the person whose birthday it is and apparently this was already agreed upon.

    [​IMG]
     
    PAHokie, Keef, Clemson327 and 9 others like this.
  42. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    Ohh darn, I was gunna volunteer to watch him while yall are all gone
     
    Baron likes this.
  43. El Tiburon

    El Tiburon Well-Known Member
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    If MLS scheduled a tour of the Turkish embassy for you, be very suspicious.
     
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  44. One Two

    One Two Hot Dog Vibes
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    I’ll refuse to go to a birthday party if it’s 30 minutes away. Have fun in Saudi Arabia
     
  45. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    I'll refuse to go to Hollywood from West Hollywood - I was signed up for this without my approval and can't fucking back out now.
     
    One Two likes this.
  46. One Two

    One Two Hot Dog Vibes
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    Try this simple trick

    Wake up with a tummy ache the day you’re supposed to fly out
     
  47. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Wouldn't work - absolutely the response I would get would be "there are bathrooms at airports and on the plane"
     
  48. Boom TittyMilk

    Boom TittyMilk User Formerly known as Big R
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    I mean it looks like you got a 6 weeks notice
     
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  49. Boom TittyMilk

    Boom TittyMilk User Formerly known as Big R
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    Also i had no idea where the fuck Riyadh was located
     
  50. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Yea but I feel like flying to Saudi warrants more than a typical quitting job notice.
     
    Baron likes this.