Pffft, I grew up shit talking in white trash Florida and have left several times. She would leave day 1.
This place isn’t for the faint of heart. She’d be asked for pics immediately and then the shitstorm would ensue. Probably best she stays away unless she can sports talk.
I was at my in laws house when my first kid was probably a year old. I wake up and start copping a feel on my wife. She’s sort of into it so I say something like “spread your legs so I can finger your pussy”. She replies with “great job, dumbass…the baby monitor is on downstairs”. I go downstairs and her whole family is face deep in coffee staring at the ground. Luckily, they never communicate about anything and sweep it all under the rug.
Should have started eating something that required finger to mouth at breakfast and just watch the world burn "Anybody else want some of this watermelon?"
I can top this. Had a high school acquaintance who was a low level drug dealer when we were all in college. He would mainly sell weed but I would see him out from time to time and he would always boast about being able to get anything. So we would hit him up occasionally. Well his dad eventually caught him and changed his number. coincidently this woman who was close friends with my parents and the mother of my best friends future wife just happened to get a new number at the same time and got his number. so over the next several years she proceeded to field texts from former drug dealer customers. Including several from me identifying myself by first and last name asking for not only weed but much more hardcore drugs as my degenerate habits evolved in my later college years. so yes I asked my parents friend multiple times for weed, cocaine, Molly, acid etc. I still see this woman several times a year and have a minor panic attack every time.
I've been running through what I would do in this scenario, probably would have snuck out the back door and texted a lie of some kind of why we had to rush out If my grandparents/in-laws hear my dirty talk, I'd probably need a lot of therapy
One of the girls I work with is going through a separation but they still currently live together and apparently she slapped him with an open sleeve of crackers today I, like an asshole, immediately laughed as she was explaining this because it's absolutely absurd absurd We have fun here
They live in Colombia, so when they come they always stay at least that long. Last time was almost 3 months.
My old admin was from Mexico and her husband was from here. Her mom came to visit and stayed over 12 months with them. She was still here with them when the admin resigned and was moving to another city. As far as I know that poor guys mother in law is still just permanently moved in with them.
Yea, it honestly zoned me out of the conversation for a minute Did you not realize how much cleanup this incurs?
This honestly sounds like a backdoor life hack. Like, do you even report DV when it sounds like the whitest trash shit imaginable?
Reminds me of the Chappelle Smollet bit "Ok sir, and at that time she hit you aggressively, Saltines??"
I get this. My mom is the same way. When she comes over, if there is a water cup on the counter she washes it. I'll go through 5-10 cups in a few hours because she keeps cleaning it even though the cup is clearly half full and still being used. She also washes by hand rather than just putting it in the dish washer just to the left of my sink. It's super helpful that she wants to help clean, but you don't need to hover around the sink the entire day and hoover up every single dish in the house the second they are out of someone's hand.
I was informed via text this morning that some friends of ours are having a "vowel renewal" ceremony next month.
I was hanging out with my friend one day and he just casually mentioned that I needed to stop trying to buy drugs from this person because his girlfriend's mom now has his number. They all kind of just laughed at me and called me an idiot. Fair.
yeah. i was 19. prone to many poor decisions. but back in the day if you were soliciting it was important you identified yourself so they knew you weren't a NARC. it's not like i could have said this was User Snakes
I get identifying yourself but my move was always just to ask "are you around"? pretty sure mentioning the drugs would have gotten my number blocked.
i eventually wised up and figured that shit out but I was a novice in those days. fortunately it makes for a great story. been telling it at parties for years.
Ha, well this situation it's actually supposed to be their wedding... but still some divorce paperwork pending so they can't "officially" get married so the renewal is their way of having a celebration and signifying marriage. The whole situation isn't nearly as scandalous or WT as it sounds, but out of respect for them, I don't really want to elaborate further.
I’m confused. They aren’t even married, but are renewing their vows? How is that possible if they haven’t even taken vows (to each other)? And why not just wait until the divorce(s) are final and have an actual wedding? What’s the rush?
Not to my knowledge. But there are some health issues involved in the whole thing too and it's just not my place to talk about it. The big thing is they didn't realize the state has a mandatory cooling off period for divorce but since the "wedding" is a destination thing they can't really change dates. So this is the workaround. Then they will just do the official paperwork later.
we don’t know you nor these people bud no need for all the secrecy but what is getting us wrapped around the axle is the “renewal” part. Were they married before, then divorced and married other people, and now want to get married to each other again? If not there is nothing to renew
No, they weren't. But because she isn't officially divorced yet (her and the ex have been separated for a few years but stayed officially married for insurance/financial reasons and are on good terms), they can't get a marriage license for an "official" ceremony... I have no idea, but that's what I'm told. But I guess they are allowed to have a renewal because it doesn't need a license, so that's what they are doing. It's a disorganized mess but it's not my life, I'm just going along for the ride. The whole point was both my wife (and our friend) called it a vowel renewal. I was responding with all sorts of grammar puns and no one figured it out either.