Stupid shit your wife/girlfriend does...

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by bertwing, May 16, 2016.

  1. Simon Templar

    Simon Templar Well-Known Member
    Kansas JayhawksChicago CubsSneakersBig 8 Conference

    What if the guy had slept with 20 of the friend group, would you prevent that?
     
    dump likes this.
  2. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Depends on the girl.

    I obviously don't remotely care - a lot of people would and do.
     
  3. Simon Templar

    Simon Templar Well-Known Member
    Kansas JayhawksChicago CubsSneakersBig 8 Conference

    That’s fair.
     
  4. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    Yall are dumdums for never hearing about rascal scooters
     
  5. IHHH

    IHHH Well-Known Member
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    is that a new hairstyle I never heard of?
     
  6. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    Shush Canadian the adults are talking
     
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  7. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Not my wife thankfully but I just get a call from a friend:

    "x wanted to do a feijoada and watch the games today and we're now looking at like 9 hours on this project, at what point do I start being really worried?"
     
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  8. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    MLS, it's nothing formal can you just pack my computer bag and a few of the Lacoste hoodies because it's going to be windy and I don't feel like getting an ear infection:

    "You don't have any hoodies"

    The Lacoste long sleeve t-shirts that have a hood on them.

    "Those aren't hoodies, hoodies imply being thicker"

    JFC just pack me our best pair of earmuffs
     
  9. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    Best pair of earmuffs is a pair of thighs
     
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  10. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    New Orleans PelicansNew Orleans SaintsMississippi Rebels

    Realistically I missed several layup jokes during this conversation and she may have been shooting for them. I was off my game.
     
  11. DriveByBBQ

    DriveByBBQ Well-Known Member
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    I don’t let our two-year old watch Paw Patrol. Not a fan of the show, everything is in a permanent state of peril/chaos, and it over stimulates him. It’s not high quality programming.

    So much so that last night a guest at our house asked what shows we let our toddler watch and I spelled out “paw patrol” in mentioning what I don’t want him watching, to avoid saying it in front of the toddler. Wife was present for this conversation.

    Wife bought toddler a new toothbrush today. It’s a paw patrol themed toothbrush.
     
  12. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    Buddy it’ll be ok
     
  13. a.tramp

    a.tramp Insubordinate and churlish
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    No job is too big, no pup is too small!
     
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  14. soulfly

    soulfly Well-Known Member
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    Sounds like the warden has spoken.
     
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  15. devine

    devine hi, i am user devine
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    Paw patrol is copaganda
     
  16. Tobias

    Tobias dan “the man qb1” jones fan account
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    the episode i saw today where skye got in her chopper and opened the turrets up on protestors was a bit alarming tbh
     
  17. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    Link?
     
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  18. burnttatertot

    burnttatertot No Whammies!
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    Sounds like this Paw Patrol show is just preparing him for this new administration.
     
    IV and dump like this.
  19. Arrec Bardwin

    Arrec Bardwin La Araña Discoteca
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    WHAT!?!
     
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  20. Clemson327

    Clemson327 Well-Known Member
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    TIL that feijoada exists, and I am intrigued.
     
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  21. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    It's fantastic, but if you're hitting afternoon/evening games and it's still not ready start being concerned about the process.
     
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  22. Lip

    Lip Well-Known Member
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    just how hot we talkin?
     
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  23. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    New Orleans PelicansNew Orleans SaintsMississippi Rebels

    She's pretty ridiculous - but neither myself or MLS has hooked up with her if that is any indicator of the amount of red flags present.

    That I'm aware of at least.
     
    #20873 Eathan Edwards, Nov 11, 2024
    Last edited: Nov 11, 2024
    dump and billdozer like this.
  24. Snakes

    Snakes clumsy interloper
    Donor TMB OG
    Alabama Crimson Tide

    Did you see the episode where rubble gassed the migrants? Saw that and knew we had to switch back to Daniel Tiger.
     
  25. bruce bowen

    bruce bowen Well-Known Member
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    My son is already indoctrinated. Calls Daniel Tiger a snowflake lib. Stands with the thin paw line.
     
  26. infected donkey

    infected donkey Arkansas Razorbacks
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    Ryder needs us!
     
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  27. Tricky Dick

    Tricky Dick Well-Known Member
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    [​IMG]
     
  28. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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    Thinking that walking the dog in the dark and bringing a headlamp is a "dumb idea"
     
  29. zeberdee

    zeberdee wheel snipe celly boys
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    she’s just worried she’s going to see you in that headlamp and lose the ability to be physically attracted to you.
     
  30. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    New Orleans PelicansNew Orleans SaintsMississippi Rebels

    It's arguably better than the Weho special of walking a dog while using the light on your iphone in areas that have shitty street light setups.

    Recent dog probably not getting picked on, but in general you're just asking to get robbed.
     
    One Two and dump like this.
  31. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    New Orleans PelicansNew Orleans SaintsMississippi Rebels

    Somewhat on that same topic:

    It's consistently been an item of (shit talking) conversation after MLS got mugged that it was impossible for me to get mugged unless I got jumped because I'm too fast. She was arguing how fast she was and I kept telling her my tactic of immediately heading into a sprint across a street wouldn't work, at all, for her.

    This diatribe resulted in us testing 40 times as well as a bunch of our friend group :roll::roll:
     
  32. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    Need to see that scorecard
     
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  33. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    New Orleans PelicansNew Orleans SaintsMississippi Rebels

    It was not the UF scorecard you are hoping for.

    If I can find it, I'll post it though. I know MLS ran a 5.65 and refuses to accept me telling her that's a really good time.

    I ran sub 4.8 and have probably mentioned to everyone willing to listen.
     
  34. Snakes

    Snakes clumsy interloper
    Donor TMB OG
    Alabama Crimson Tide

    I believe they call it "the ick"
     
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  35. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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    Gents I didn't say girlfriend. Not sure it matters at this point. But it was incredible to scoop the poop without holding a flashlight and a leash in one hand
     
  36. bruce bowen

    bruce bowen Well-Known Member
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    I DM'd ned's head to get the link and this is what he sent me
    upload_2024-11-12_9-58-2.png
     
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  37. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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  38. Hatfield

    Hatfield Charlie don’t surf
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    +2 mana with that as well
     
  39. Imurhuckleberry

    Imurhuckleberry Avid spectator of windmill warriors
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    Laser timed and non-wind aided of course.
     
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  40. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    New Orleans PelicansNew Orleans SaintsMississippi Rebels

    It was actually pretty legit but we were both training aggressively leading up to it.

    I’d be pumped to hit anything under a 5 at this point.
     
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  41. IHHH

    IHHH Well-Known Member
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    Notre Dame Fighting IrishMontreal Canadiens

    upload_2024-11-12_18-57-32.jpeg
     
  42. scissors

    scissors Very Sharp Member
    Donor TMB OG

    My younger son was reading jokes/riddles tonight.

    Him: Which month has 28 days?
    Me: Hmm don’t know
    Him: All of them
    Me: Yep, all months have at least 28 days
    Wife: Not true…February only has 27 days once every 4 years
    Me: What?
    Wife: Leap year…February skips a day
    Me: nathanfillion.gif
     
  43. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
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    We were watching the Paul/Tyson fight last night and it went in on the commentators before the fights started and my wife says “oh look! It’s that lady from The Flight Attendant. Good for her!” I said “you mean Rosie Perez?” “I guess that’s her name I don’t know but good for her for getting to do more stuff”.
     
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  44. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
    Staff Donor
    Atlanta BravesDenver BroncosChicago BlackhawksBirmingham LegionMississippi Rebels

    She was great in the flight attendant
     
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  45. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
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    Arkansas RazorbacksSt. Louis CardinalsHouston RocketsDallas CowboysSneakers

    I said the lyrics to “Good Morning” and she said “ohhh”
     
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  46. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    Haven’t you been mugged multiple times
     
    Lip likes this.
  47. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    New Orleans PelicansNew Orleans SaintsMississippi Rebels

    Hence the caveat. Four times is pretty good for where I went out growing up and where I've worked.

    I used to have to make some dumbass 3:30am walks home after work every night and have successfully evaded around 7 or 8 mugging attempts by just entering a full sprint.

    If you see "Weho man shot in back....but was allegedly running pretty fast for his age", you'll know the system has its flaws.
     
  48. IHHH

    IHHH Well-Known Member
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    Notre Dame Fighting IrishMontreal Canadiens

    Pretty sure I could mug you if it came to it
     
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  49. bigred77

    bigred77 Well-Known Member
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    Try it
     
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  50. IHHH

    IHHH Well-Known Member
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    Notre Dame Fighting IrishMontreal Canadiens

    I would need to catch a flight to la, sneak near a place where a young woman parks illegally every day and then use my stealth to nullify that 4.8 speed. Not a walk in the park but I could pull it off
     
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