Stupid shit your wife/girlfriend does...

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by bertwing, May 16, 2016.

  1. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
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    Her response: " Well, I've been talking about this since like January".
     
  2. thunderstruck

    thunderstruck I'm a Boss

    Maybe you should move out in July and let er and the garden stay.
     
  3. Shawn Hunter

    Shawn Hunter Vote Corey Matthews for Congress
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    Your wife's side of the family is retarded.
     
    The Hotch, dvnasty, Fancy and 20 others like this.
  4. Hoss Bonaventure

    Hoss Bonaventure I can’t pee with clothes touching my butt
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    Not married. They are full on hilljacks though
     
  5. DaveGrohl

    DaveGrohl Public Figure
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    this is amazing
     
  6. Gambler

    Gambler Hog Fan
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    Please tell me you told her it was.
     
  7. Jigga

    Jigga Ty Webb is a mean person
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    Friend shared this one with me the other day about his wife.

    He's color blind so he labels the inside of his work pants so he can at least attempt to match.

    When they started living together she took over this process for him.

    She labeled the black pants with a black B
    The blue pants with a blue B
    And the brown pants with a brown B

    He had to explain to her why that doesn't help.
     
    The Hotch, Clegg, kinghill and 119 others like this.
  8. a.tramp

    a.tramp Insubordinate and churlish
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  9. oknole

    oknole MC OG
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    Yes. Don't you remember the manned expedition to Mars?
     
    TC likes this.
  10. fetumpsh

    fetumpsh Well-Known Member
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    With all due respect, I hope "Buckets" is her new nickname. That's just great.
     
  11. Arrec Bardwin

    Arrec Bardwin La Araña Discoteca
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    Buy that hoe some herbs or something to put in little pots until yall move
     
    TC, Iron Mickey, Doug and 1 other person like this.
  12. Arkadin

    Arkadin inefficiently efficent and unclearly clear
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    If you want a small indoor garden she can't kill and you'll get to use the shit:

    https://edntech.com
     
  13. Rabid

    Rabid Fan of: DQ Treats
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    Mine arrived this week. I plan to plant it this afternoon with my son.
     
  14. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    $129 for that YAOFACE
     
    ashy larry and TheFreak55 like this.
  15. Shawn Hunter

    Shawn Hunter Vote Corey Matthews for Congress
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    God damn she is stupid
     
    One Two likes this.
  16. dahldennsull

    dahldennsull Living in the best state
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    yeah, she is obviously really dumb in this instance, but you said parents, as in Dad was part of this? I get it if gf and mom go off shopping at lowe's to fulfill this grand plan, but somewhere dad has to step in to say WTF are you two doing?
     
  17. Baron

    Baron Well-Known Member
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    I'm willing to bet the dad was left out of the loop on the whole background of the garden thing and was just told by wife and daughter, go to Lowe's and get this for said garden. Can't blame dad imo.
     
    Babou, Blu Tang Clan, dump and 3 others like this.
  18. OZ

    OZ Old balls

    I was color blind but now I'm dead.
     
    dump, a.tramp and Jigga like this.
  19. lfriend

    lfriend Well-Known Member
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    Having fun pulling out a bunch of wet cardboard that was a Galaxy s7 edge box from my washing machine and from the floor next to it.

    My bff of course has no idea how it got there from being put up or how she didn't notice a box in the laundry basket :facepalm:
     
    TheFreak55 likes this.
  20. Taffy

    Taffy Token Brit poster
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    I can go one better: a dirty nappy (diaper) in with a wash. Those things break up and get EVERYWHERE. Also, dirty nappy all over your clothes :blech:
    Thankfully it was a #1, not a #2.
     
    -Asshole-, wes tegg, dump and 7 others like this.
  21. HotMic

    HotMic PopTart Mascot Enthusiast
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    [​IMG]
     
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  22. tylerdolphin

    tylerdolphin My spoon is too big
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    I dont think my best friend has ever seen a video on Facebook that didn't inspire her to hit play.
     
  23. skiedfrillet

    skiedfrillet It's not a lie if you believe it.
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    Went shopping for some dress shirts and i saw some boxer briefs in the checkout line that looked pretty comfy so I grabbed a pair

    Me: oh these look comfy *grabs pair of mediums*

    We walk up to cashier and start handing her all my wares

    Gf: "oh you got a new pair of underwear? Don't you think you should get the smalls?"

    Me: :gross:
    Cashier::chrispaulnoooo:
    Gf::hilldawg:
     
  24. Boom TittyMilk

    Boom TittyMilk User Formerly known as Big R
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    Zero regard for skillets manhood. Well played
     
  25. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Haven't heard an Abby story in awhile. Good to hear she's still got it.
     
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  26. Boom TittyMilk

    Boom TittyMilk User Formerly known as Big R
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    Abby is never going to lose that vice grip on skillets balls.
     
    TC, dahldennsull, Fancy and 7 others like this.
  27. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby Daddy’s #1 Candy Baby
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    What sort of white-belt-selling establishment has a checkout line?
     
  28. skiedfrillet

    skiedfrillet It's not a lie if you believe it.
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    i shop in only the finest of banana republics
     
    visa, tylerdolphin and dathalfnukkahd like this.
  29. TheFreak55

    TheFreak55 He should keep his mouth firmly shut
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    banana republice? what a poor
     
  30. HatterasJack

    HatterasJack Is your refrigerator running? It's Mike Hunt.
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    As someone who is colorblind and has to write the colors on my work pants, this one hit me right in the feels. But also funny as shit.
     
    dahldennsull, OZ, One Two and 11 others like this.
  31. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby Daddy’s #1 Candy Baby
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    I too am colorblind, and clothing companies need to stop being dicks by listing bullshit shades/terms of art instead of primary colors.
     
    dahldennsull, OZ, One Two and 11 others like this.
  32. a.tramp

    a.tramp Insubordinate and churlish
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    Looks like someone is seeing fuchsia over this
     
  33. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby Daddy’s #1 Candy Baby
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    I'm turning moonshine
     
  34. Shawn Hunter

    Shawn Hunter Vote Corey Matthews for Congress
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    I am also colorblind
     
  35. texasraider

    texasraider thanks
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    I refer to myself as color challenged
     
  36. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby Daddy’s #1 Candy Baby
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    Let us all gingerly touch our tips
     
    TC, Fancy, football501 and 7 others like this.
  37. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
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    I think you set a good precedent here. She'll think twice before posting something that outrageously gay again.
     
    TC and IHHH like this.
  38. IHHH

    IHHH Well-Known Member
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    If I get as slim as my bones allow me I am not a small...border line medium. Jesus, she basically took your manhod
     
  39. IHHH

    IHHH Well-Known Member
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    Done
     
  40. skiedfrillet

    skiedfrillet It's not a lie if you believe it.
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    she was making fun of my penis

    not my frame
     
  41. IHHH

    IHHH Well-Known Member
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    Goddamit, i will run
     
  42. Taffy

    Taffy Token Brit poster
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    You'd all probably fuck that up
     
  43. TimJimothy

    TimJimothy Well-Known Member
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    I guess in this thread I learned that there are quite a few color-challenged fellas on this board.

    Feels good being able to see all of the colors, man.
     
  44. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Kansas State WildcatsSeattle Kraken

    I've got some slight green colorblindness. Sup fam.
    It's fairly common in men, like 15-20%
     
  45. lhprop1

    lhprop1 Fullsterkur
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  46. Cabs

    Cabs eatin' fried okra with Oprah
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    #teamcolorblind
     
    Nole0515, OZ, milquetoast and 3 others like this.
  47. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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  48. texasraider

    texasraider thanks
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    Why you posting a circle of dots man am I supposed to stare at it and see a ship or something
     
  49. blind dog

    blind dog wps
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  50. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    IT'S A SCHOONER!