Texts from Bennett

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by knightjustice, Nov 30, 2011.

  1. Xander Crews

    Xander Crews Well-Known Member
    Donor

    http://textsfrombennett.tumblr.com/

    "These are text messages I exchange with my 17 year old cousin Bennett. He is a white boy that thinks he's a Crip, works at Amoco, has a girlfriend named Mercedes, and is one of the most unintentionally funny and brilliant souls on the planet."

    [​IMG]
     
  2. jplaYa

    jplaYa CHAMPZY/SMOLTZY/CHELSEA
    Donor TMB OG

  3. jplaYa

    jplaYa CHAMPZY/SMOLTZY/CHELSEA
    Donor TMB OG

  4. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby happy as an old hammer dog

    Lost at the Illuminati one
     
  5. TC

    TC I shouldn't have to fuck for free
    Donor

    Thread will get more action if you change the title to Texts from Cole Westbrook
     
  6. Arrec Bardwin

    Arrec Bardwin The purest of hebrews
    Donor

    Why the fuck does that guy have 135 unchecked text messages?
     
  7. kentucky_dawg

    kentucky_dawg Fan of: Georgia :\
    Donor

    why does this guy have so many new messages?

    also:

    [​IMG]
     
    GoodForAnother and Buster like this.
  8. PAHokieinRVA

    PAHokieinRVA Well-Known Member
    Donor

  9. kentucky_dawg

    kentucky_dawg Fan of: Georgia :\
    Donor

    [​IMG]
     
  10. Manny

    Manny I love lamp.

  11. Franktus and 96 others

    Franktus and 96 others Bama, Southern Miss, Barves
    Donor

    YOU HAVE 118 TEXT MESSAGES????
     
  12. Xander Crews

    Xander Crews Well-Known Member
    Donor

    Is anyone surprised that he looks like this?

    [​IMG]
     
    Kirk Fogg likes this.
  13. Arrec Bardwin

    Arrec Bardwin The purest of hebrews
    Donor

  14. Jax Teller

    Jax Teller Well-Known Member
    Donor

    That is wonderful. I look forward to hearing more from Bennett
     
  15. BamaPhanatik

    BamaPhanatik New Member

    i want to believe that to be real so badly...
     
    ndamem2000 and Craig Pettis like this.
  16. Joshuam2107

    Joshuam2107 SUH DUDE
    Donor

    I just don't know what to think yet, but you have my attention thread..
     
  17. clemsontyger04

    clemsontyger04 Two offensive coordinators are better than one
    Donor TMB OG

  18. PAHokieinRVA

    PAHokieinRVA Well-Known Member
    Donor

    Read all of them, amazing stuff.
     
  19. RGClemson05

    RGClemson05 Well-Known Member
    Donor TMB OG

    [​IMG]
     
    GBG_24 likes this.
  20. Vito Corleone

    Vito Corleone Expert on experts
    TMB OG

  21. Joshuam2107

    Joshuam2107 SUH DUDE
    Donor

    last one sold me..Bennegtt the G is silent
    like lasanya
     
    Kirk Fogg likes this.
  22. Arrec Bardwin

    Arrec Bardwin The purest of hebrews
    Donor

    lol at the Lil waynes lyric being because lasagna doesnt make noise when you eat it.
     
    GBG_24 likes this.
  23. JonathanCoachman

    JonathanCoachman The Coach
    Donor

    Someone is angling for a sitcom that lasts 3 episodes. Is Shatner available to play Bennett?
     
    Kirk Fogg likes this.
  24. hudson

    hudson Oh, you know...stuff.
    TMB OG

    I'm sitting here doing group work while doing the trying not to laugh crack up laugh.
     
  25. kennypowers

    kennypowers Billy Shakespeare wrote a whole bunch of sonnets
    Donor TMB OG

    I was good until HUSTLA DA RABBIT in all caps.
     
  26. 34

    34 your favourite snow mexican
    Donor TMB OG

    [​IMG]

    gold
     
    Duvel, righty, kcutb and 2 others like this.
  27. Mix

    Mix I deserve to be blown before the Jacuzzi
    Staff Member Donor TMB OG

    hahahaha im dying
     
  28. RO

    RO Half the Man StinkeePinkee is, literally.
    Donor TMB OG

    This is my favorite, unbelievably funny.
     
  29. BudKilmer

    BudKilmer Well-Known Member
    Donor TMB OG

    more please for those who are firewalled at work
     
  30. AUB

    AUB Now we got bad blood, breh
    Donor TMB OG

    funny but they've gotta be fake
     
  31. kentucky_dawg

    kentucky_dawg Fan of: Georgia :\
    Donor

     
  32. BudKilmer

    BudKilmer Well-Known Member
    Donor TMB OG

    dont you ruin this for me
     
  33. UA412

    UA412 Well-Known Member
    Staff Member TMB OG

    A good bit of it is believable. And then you get this shit

    [​IMG]
     
  34. fsugrad99

    fsugrad99 I'm the victim here
    Donor

    there's a movie script in this
     
  35. kslim

    kslim EMAW
    Donor

    is that a tracfone? dudes balling out of control
     
  36. Hogview

    Hogview Fan of the Green board, Razorbacks
    Donor TMB OG

    These guys are probably 30 year olds from the north east. One of my best friends lives in Boston, has a $150k a year job, and has a Phd from Tufts. His emails and txt are like this all the time.
     
  37. AUB

    AUB Now we got bad blood, breh
    Donor TMB OG

    Yeah a retarded wigger is not going to know who van gogh is, and if he was smart enough to know, I doubt he would relate a painter who has been dead for over a century to a movie actor just because his name is vince.

    Trying too hard for sake of popularity of the web site was a dead giveaway
     
  38. Phil Connors

    Donor TMB OG

    Odds ColeWestbrook knows who Van Gogh is?
     
  39. tandin

    tandin very well known member
    Donor

    dying laughing in my office
     
  40. BMR

    BMR Buddy 4 Hugs
    Donor

    "The sex symbol himself. Don’t let him fool you. That is a laser tag gun my Aunt Lillian bought him for his birthday."

    hahahhahahaahhhaha
     
  41. BearlyHere

    BearlyHere Is this thing on?
    Donor

    This is what I imagine pearl 's text inbox looks like
     
  42. 3NolesFan3

    3NolesFan3 You're probably a cunt
    Donor TMB OG

    I think seeing him in person would be my breaking point in life where I officially snap and go on a rampage killing wiggers across America.
     
  43. 3NolesFan3

    3NolesFan3 You're probably a cunt
    Donor TMB OG

    I mean God fucking damn it.
     
    BearlyHere likes this.
  44. triceratops

    triceratops Tribe Of Dan
    Staff Member Donor TMB OG

    faker than a prada sunglasses bought in-front of the washington monumement
     
  45. Miguel Sanchez

    Miguel Sanchez As of this moment, Lionel Hutz no longer exists...
    Donor

    Total fake and a painfully unfunny try-hard. On a completely unrelated note, I am now going to read a gubber thread and wet myself.
     
  46. pearl

    pearl Fan of: White wimmens feet
    Donor TMB OG

    This nigga ain't real, he faker than plies' accent
     
  47. Keywan1472

    Keywan1472 Muhfuggas wanna fine mi

    i aint even knooo plies had an axcent
     
  48. Taques

    Taques Knuck If U Cuck
    Staff Member Donor TMB OG

    man fuck you
     
  49. soulfly

    soulfly Well-Known Member

    rockwilder got the first laugh out of me.