Vasectomy Thread

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by CUAngler, Feb 24, 2021.

  1. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    It's really nit bad unless ur nuts turn black
     
  2. fsugrad99

    fsugrad99 I'm the victim here
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    Like, I had it late yesterday afternoon. I just walked down to the bar for a sandwich and a few beers. For me, this has been almost nothing
     
    RockHardJawn39 likes this.
  3. RockHardJawn39

    RockHardJawn39 #FranklinOUT
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    Be careful though. A guy I work with felt fine after and hit some balls on a golf simulator the next day. The following day he had a testicle swell to like “orange” size
     
  4. pnk$krtcrÿnästÿ

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    I just remembered I have a vasectomy consult this afternoon, and I definitely beefed a 'sturb earlier. He's gonna know, man, I just know he's gonna know.
     
    Baron and Name P. Redacted like this.
  5. Iron Mickey

    Iron Mickey a guy who posted here like five years ago hates me
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    he's a urologist. everyone he meets has just jerked it. he just jerked it.
     
    Uncle Si likes this.
  6. pnk$krtcrÿnästÿ

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    That's the most reassuring thing I've ever been told
     
  7. DuckKin

    DuckKin Well-Known Member

    Its best to just picture everyone naked and masturbating.
     
    pnk$krtcrÿnästÿ likes this.
  8. pnk$krtcrÿnästÿ

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    Now I've got a different problem
     
  9. kinghill

    kinghill Cool American Flavour
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    Did anyone ever question Where Eagles Dare on this post

    Is he saying to nut 30 times in 8 weeks? What am I reading here
     
    blind dog likes this.
  10. WhiskeyDelta

    WhiskeyDelta Well-Known Member
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    Mine is 40x in 12 weeks I think.

    Apparently because there’s no “flow” from the testicles anymore it can take that many emissions over several months to clear the pipes.
     
  11. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    What is there to question? Seems low 20s is the recommended #.
     
  12. RockHardJawn39

    RockHardJawn39 #FranklinOUT
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    Just completed. Time for beer and couch I think
     
    danny2430, fsugrad99 and EagleDuck like this.
  13. NoNatty

    NoNatty Keyboard Cowboy
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    Got snipped today. I’m telling my wife I am in agonizing pain and can’t move off the couch but feel completely fine so far.
     
  14. fsugrad99

    fsugrad99 I'm the victim here
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    Peeps say to get frozen peas. I was all, naw man I want something I’ll actually eat.

    So that frozen shrimp fried rice that cooled my balls and filled my stomach was the right play
     
  15. RockHardJawn39

    RockHardJawn39 #FranklinOUT
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    I’m not in agonizing pain, but I am starting to get sore.
     
  16. cal

    cal BOATS
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    i’m sanding down an old changing table to turn into bar cart

    neighbor across the street comes over and asks “what’s with the changing table? y’all got a 3rd on the way?”

    :yaoface:
     
    bigred77 likes this.
  17. NoNatty

    NoNatty Keyboard Cowboy
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    A week post vasectomy. That was extremely easy, and having a weekend of just sitting on the couch I would almost score it as a net positive.
     
    Brocephus, Baron and Pokes like this.
  18. Pokes

    Pokes Younger, hipper, cooler
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    About a year in to worry free loads. 10/10 would recommend.
     
  19. Jeffrey Lebowski

    Jeffrey Lebowski Obviously you're not a golfer
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    Had my consultation yesterday. getting anxiety thinking about it. I’ve had pretty involved surgeries including one awake (lasik).

    I feel 99.9999% sure we are done having kids (have 3). Not sure why I’m having second thoughts.
     
  20. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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    I might have second thoughts if I wasn't 100% done. It was very much a binary decision for me
     
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  21. Jeffrey Lebowski

    Jeffrey Lebowski Obviously you're not a golfer
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    I actually feel confident we are done. I think I’m struggling with it meaning a certain chapter of life is over. I’m sure it’s just my brain going into worry mode
     
    Snakes and ned's head like this.
  22. LuPoor

    LuPoor Cuddle with the homies watching Stand By Me
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    You've got 3 and you aren't sure you're done?? Are you mentally ill
     
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  23. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    I quit after 1. Idk how ppl do it
     
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  24. Jeffrey Lebowski

    Jeffrey Lebowski Obviously you're not a golfer
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    upload_2022-10-21_7-8-25.gif
     
    Stagger Lee, DuckKin, Snakes and 4 others like this.
  25. Snakes

    Snakes clumsy interloper
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    what's the ole lady saying?
     
  26. Hail Southern

    Hail Southern GATA Eagles!
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  27. Hail Southern

    Hail Southern GATA Eagles!
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    48hours

    Nurse said I am not getting valium but rather a shot in the arm when I arrive to "calm me down and make me happy"
     
    Jeffrey Lebowski likes this.
  28. Pokes

    Pokes Younger, hipper, cooler
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    The valium did nothing for me and my anxiety was far and away the worst part of it. Probably a good thing
     
    Hail Southern likes this.
  29. NoNatty

    NoNatty Keyboard Cowboy
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    The soldering of your balls that you can smell is the worst part by far.
     
  30. WhiskeyDelta

    WhiskeyDelta Well-Known Member
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    I had no-scalpel and did not experience that. I could hear it though.
     
    ned's head likes this.
  31. Jeffrey Lebowski

    Jeffrey Lebowski Obviously you're not a golfer
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    Scheduled for next month
     
    Hail Southern likes this.
  32. ugafish

    ugafish Not a new member
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    Lucky you. I guess your doc didn’t grab your 2nd nut and Squeeze the fuck out of it. The lidocaine was also worse than the smell.
     
    billdozer likes this.
  33. billdozer

    billdozer Well-Known Member
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    This was the worst part for me. He had the G.I. Joe Kung Fu grip.
     
  34. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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    I'm sorry so many of you had bad experiences. The worst part for me was when the doc put his tongue in my ass, but it sounds like I got off relatively light.
     
  35. ugafish

    ugafish Not a new member
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    No doubt, that other nut hurt for months
     
  36. IV

    IV Freedom is the right of all sentient beings
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    My dad tells me he wishes he had more, I choose to take this as a compliment
     
  37. LuPoor

    LuPoor Cuddle with the homies watching Stand By Me
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    I've got two and that was one too many
     
    Where Eagles Dare likes this.
  38. IV

    IV Freedom is the right of all sentient beings
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    I have 2 siblings and we’re all extremely different, maybe he’s just curious
     
  39. Hail Southern

    Hail Southern GATA Eagles!
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    Made it home. The procedure was a breeze, if your doctor ask if you want a shot to make you feel good TAKE IT. The anxiety about the whole thing is far worse than the actual procedure is. There were two moment where it was painful during the procedure but not that bad at all, maybe 4 out of 10. Sitting at home with ice on the boys now, looking forward to app state getting their ass kicked tonight. GATA
     
    bigred77, Jeffrey Lebowski and Baron like this.
  40. Jeffrey Lebowski

    Jeffrey Lebowski Obviously you're not a golfer
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    I'm afraid to ask what type of pain. I will be getting the drink of the good stuff (Versed)
     
    Hail Southern likes this.
  41. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    I'm glad I stopped at 1
     
  42. Hail Southern

    Hail Southern GATA Eagles!
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    I had my procedure Thursday. It’s Monday before my first day back at work and I woke up at 3am from the pain. I’ve been sitting on my ass since Thursday and had some black bruise spots on both sides with steady 5 out of 10 pain but this morning white walking, I have more swelling and pain is up to 7 out of 10 when moving. I got back on my opioids yesterday cause I noticed the pain getting slightly worse. Has me pretty nervous. I will call their office today once they open.

    Updated post to clarify pain
     
    #592 Hail Southern, Nov 7, 2022
    Last edited: Nov 7, 2022
  43. WhiskeyDelta

    WhiskeyDelta Well-Known Member
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    Pain getting worse on Day 4 or so isn’t unusual but being at a constant 5 level is not.
     
  44. Hail Southern

    Hail Southern GATA Eagles!
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    it's just when I move really or get up. Sitting down the pain is probably a 1 or 0.
     
  45. RockHardJawn39

    RockHardJawn39 #FranklinOUT
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    I had mine done on a Friday and the whole next week was rough sitting and standing. Tight underwear/compression shorts help. Week 2 I felt a lot better.

    they never gave me opioids though.
     
  46. Hail Southern

    Hail Southern GATA Eagles!
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    I'm going to get a jock strap today, feel like I missed out on that advice until its too late. 1/2 the pain I get is from below my belly button in my mid section where it hurts if you get kicked in the nuts.

    Balls are currently 2X the size of normal. reading online it sounds like this could last for another week+
     
    #596 Hail Southern, Nov 7, 2022
    Last edited: Nov 7, 2022
  47. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member
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    Oh god I couldn't imagine going without a jock strap
     
  48. LuPoor

    LuPoor Cuddle with the homies watching Stand By Me
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    You've just been letting them hang loose???
     
  49. RockHardJawn39

    RockHardJawn39 #FranklinOUT
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    I did not take the jock strap advice seriously and it was regrettable
     
    Hail Southern likes this.
  50. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    I just wore my normal boxer briefs and was fine