Hell yeah. Someone on Reddit ranked the gayest teams. Very long. Spoiler Here’s what you’ve ALL BEEN WAITING FOR! The NWSL teams ranked by the proven and true standardized Gay RankingTM, patented by none other than everyone’s favorite lesbian, ME! Here’s how it works. I have here listed from most to least gay, all the NWSL teams! I am ranking based on active rosters, and clear and true confirmation of gayness via player’s social medias, which means if they have a girlfriend now or have had one in the past, they’re considered an out player! Then I have my Gaydar Bonus. This will act as a tie breaker between teams that have the same amount of out gay players. The Gaydar Bonus is the amount of players on their roster whom my gaydar pings for, which is usually very accurate. Though to keep things responsible, I will not name these players! DRUM ROLL PLEASE! From most to least gay we have: Kansas City Current: out players: Hailie Mace, Elizabeth Ball, Bia Zaneratto, Alana Cook, Michelle Cooper, Lorena, Kristen Hamilton, Debinha Gaydar bonus: 4 Coming in at a WHOPPING 8 out players, top of the table team, KC Current is also the top of this list! Orlando pride: out players: Anna Moorhouse, Viviana Villacorta, Rafaelle, Marta, Carson Pickett EDIT: Kerry Abello! Summer Yates! Kat Asman! Hoo, this bumps up Orlando SIGNIFICANTLY! Loaned out bonus: Mariana Laroquette Gaydar bonus: 3 Gotham: out players: Ann-Katrin Berger, Jess Carter, Esther Gonzalez, Tierna Davidson, Nealy Martin, Geyse, Ella Stevens EDIT: Gabi Portilho! Gaydar bonus: 3 (EDIT: Gabi was one of my Gaydar pings) SUPER BONUS: Michelle Betos Gotham is now tied for second place with EIGHT out players! Houston Dash: out players: Jane Campbell, Delanie Sheehan, Yasmeen Ryan, Paige Nielsen, Christen Westphal, Ramona Bachmann EDIT: Sarah Puntigam! Rebeca Costa da Silva! Gaydar bonus: 3 Apparently, everything IS bigger in Texas! Utah Royals: out players: Tatumn Milazzo, Madison Pogarch, CeCe Kizer, Aisha Solorzano EDIT: Alex Loera! Janni Thomsen! Ana Guzman! Gaydar bonus: 3 (Loera, Guzman, and Thomsen were one of my Gaydar pings) Not even the Mormons can keep THIS much gay away! Seattle Reign: out players: Lauren Barnes, Angarad James-Turner, Jess Fishlock, Ana-Maria Crnogorčević EDIT: Sam Meza! Cassie Miller! Julia Lester! Gaydar bonus: (EDIT: my gaydar was validated, no others ping!) Coach Bonus: Laura Harvey North Carolina Courage: out players: Feli Rauch, Meredith Speck EDIT: Courtnee Vine! Hannah Betfort! Charlotte McLean! Gaydar bonus: 2 Angel City: out players: Christen Press, Alanna Kennedy, Lily Nabet, Bre Norris EDIT: Macey Hodge! Gaydar bonus: 2 Racing Louisville: out players: Ellie Jean, Ary Borges, Uchenna Kanu EDIT: Baron! Gaydar bonus: 4 Ellie Jean made for a hard launch in the off-season announcing her relationship with (now left) teammate, Abby Erceg! San Diego wave: out players: Kailen Sheridan, Kenza Dali, Gia Corley (also ahem, BARK), Didi Harachic Gaydar bonus: 3 Kenza comes in hot with having more than one reason to call her the French Marta! Portland thorns: out players: Mackenzie Arnold, Deyna Castellanos, Kaitlyn Torpey Gaydar bonus: 5 Hopefully in the future, more players on my Gaydar will come out Chicago Red Stars (I will not submit, RED FOREVER!): out players: Maitane, Natalia Kuikka EDIT: Chardonnay Curran! Gaydar bonus: 4 Washington spirit: out players: Rebecca Bernal, Leicy Santos, Hal Hershfelt (technically yes) Gaydar bonus: 2 Hal is at least holding down the fort and keeping my hopes alive for Rowdy Audi Bay FC: out players: Racheal Kundananji, Emily Menges EDIT: Maddie Moreau! Gaydar bonus: 5 Bay FC and Chicago need more gays! No wonder they’ve been having so much trouble!
RotY locked down Are you watching yet? 👀 Riley Tiernan goes back-to-back as the Ally Rookie of the Month after dropping 3 more goals in May.— NWSL (@nwslsoccer.com) 2025-06-05T16:04:42.250Z
First pro goal ✅ Second NWSL game ✅ Rookie Sally Menti scores from distance!— NWSL (@nwslsoccer.com) 2025-06-07T03:42:27.385Z
*Berman voice*. Whoop, whoop, booooooom!!!! Jess Fishlock sets her up and Emeri Adames BOOTS it for the lead 💥— NWSL (@nwslsoccer.com) 2025-06-07T04:01:20.203Z
KC scored an own goal in the 100th minute to lose their clean sheet. Lorena looked like she was going to murder someone.
Really cool that they just keep playing until Orlando scores. Got to keep someone within 10 points of KC I guess.
Chappell Roan 🤝 Angel City tifo— The Women's Game (@womensgamemib.bsky.social) 2025-06-08T04:04:34.163Z
It’s crazy when you remember Temwa’s record is like 10 straight matches. 4 - Penelope Hocking is one of three players in the #NWSL this season (Temwa Chawinga, Esther González), and first in @bayfc.com's #NWSL history, to contribute to a goal in four consecutive regular-season matches. Vital.— OptaJack (@optajack.optajoe.com) 2025-06-08T16:05:25.693Z
Can’t find any non Italian sources but Washington bought out Sofia Cantore’s contract from Juve. I wonder if they’re starting to give up on counting on Trin?
official. If Trin ever does come back (big if) the 2 wingers plus hatch and croix won’t be able to be stopped. From Turin to DC 💫 Welcome to the Spirit, Sofia Cantore!— Washington Spirit (@washingtonspirit.com) 2025-06-17T14:23:41.113Z
SD and PDX jump up, Spirit and Gotham slide back. Week 12 brought some changes to the standings, where is your team at?! 🤫 @carmax.com | #RoadToTheShield— NWSL (@nwslsoccer.com) 2025-06-16T15:46:34.401Z
Foul counts like 14-2 in the first half and not a single fucking card. KC’s going to lose another season because refs won’t do their job and protect the players.
FUCK YOU PRO!!! First time ACFC gets into the box all match in the 60th and they give them a PK. Lorena stones the fuck out of it. PRO trying to tighten the table. Fucking gestapo.
Jesus Christ I’ve seen so many PRO screw jobs over the years but this is up there. Teachers clotheslined and nothing, ACFC player trips on the ball and they whistle a foul on KC. I want a full congressional investigation at this point.
We’re coming for those Pricks. (Roses don’t have thorns, they have pricks, any amateur 80 year old grandma knows that but the hipsters used a Poison song to name their team instead of a botanist) Kansas City has won 7 consecutive home games. The NWSL record is 8 home games (Portland Thorns 2017-18).— Mike McGrew (@zavcurrent.bsky.social) 2025-06-21T02:20:17.658Z
Washington fans having to stay up till midnight on a Sunday to watch their team. Soccer scheduling in this country is always awful.
In #NWSL week 13, there was only one team to move up in the table: North Carolina. As we head into the summer break, the 2nd through 7th placed teams are separated by only 5 points.— Alison Gale (@agale.bsky.social) 2025-06-23T04:09:36.839Z