Lawyer thread

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by Jax Teller, Apr 8, 2015.

  1. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
    Staff Donor
    Florida Gators

    Texting has really saved me from hours and hours of talking. This would normally be a 15 minute phone call after phone tag.

    upload_2019-11-14_19-35-14.jpeg
     
    bigred77 likes this.
  2. Bricktop the white

    Bricktop the white Well-Known Member

    buddy of mine just got a full remote appeals position (at a firm but mostly all-state's appeals). He's living the dream.
     
    BamaNug likes this.
  3. RJF-GUMP

    RJF-GUMP Daubert Qualified in Cooler Thermodynamics
    Donor TMB OG

    Doing nothing but writing briefs sounds terrible.
     
    wes tegg, b0ne5 and Gallant Knight like this.
  4. Bricktop the white

    Bricktop the white Well-Known Member

    i am an illiterate trial jock and don't get the appeal (:awesomeface:) either but he gets to wear a t-shirt and jeans every day and work from home.
     
  5. Gallant Knight

    Donor
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    so my associate is at a mediation this morning. our client said he had no previous wrecks. she gets to the mediation and they pull out a claims search and find 7 previous wrecks with most having injury claims.

    if she doesnt settle it i think we are going to file a motion to withdraw
     
  6. Why?Pokes

    Why?Pokes Take me back to the kine
    Donor
    Wake Forest Demon DeaconsDenver NuggetsWyoming Cowboys

    Picking up my license and taking the oath of office in about an hour. Hope this mass swear-in moves quick, it’s 85 degrees and I’ve worn a suit once in almost 18 months. Currently camped beneath an air vent in the corner of a Jack in the Box fending off homeless people and sweating my balls off.
     
  7. BUstang

    BUstang Lawyer

    Anyone practicing in Nevada here? How is it?
     
  8. Tiger Tiger Woods Y'all

    Tiger Tiger Woods Y'all Putting big balls in little holes, circa 1995
    Donor
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    this is a great visual
     
    Gallant Knight and Why?Pokes like this.
  9. Gallant Knight

    Donor
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    I was never actually sworn in. Don’t tell anyone
     
  10. SmoochieWallace

    SmoochieWallace Ipse dixit
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    My secretary swore me in.
     
    Gallant Knight likes this.
  11. (Z)

    (Z) Well-Known Member
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideBoston Red Sox

    I refused to attend the formal swearing in. Sounded absolutely awful.
     
  12. Why?Pokes

    Why?Pokes Take me back to the kine
    Donor
    Wake Forest Demon DeaconsDenver NuggetsWyoming Cowboys

    This one moved p quick. No individualized intros, no long speeches—just names and an applause. Only 90ish people passed the July bar here so it was a relatively small class.

    Last time I did it, we just picked a random judge in chambers and knocked it out in under a minute. Here, you were required to attend the ceremony and had to apply for a hardship to skip it.
     
    941Gator likes this.
  13. Gallant Knight

    Donor
    Arkansas RazorbacksHouston AstrosRice OwlsAston Villa

    Had the audacity to take Friday off and this is my punishment

    Monday: 5PM deposition in Dallas. Got back at 11 last night
    Tuesday: 8AM mediaiton. 2:30 discovery hearing
    Wednesday: 2PM mediation
    Thursday: 10 AM doctor depo
    Friday: off

    Monday: 2PM def expert depo: 5:30PM mediaiton
     
  14. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
    Staff Donor
    Florida Gators

    DetroitNole come enjoy this “hectic” schedule
     
  15. RJF-GUMP

    RJF-GUMP Daubert Qualified in Cooler Thermodynamics
    Donor TMB OG

    I hate Case Text. If it's an unreported federal district court case, instead of have 23 WL 12934 or 35 LEXIS 23498 they give you the civil action number in the case cite, i.e. John Bell v. Coast Trucking , 123-CV-1238123:42 at 12-13 (S.D. Miss. 2014). Makes you look like a scrub. West Law is just absurdly expensive though. I might make a push for Lexis at some point as a middle ground.
     
  16. Gallant Knight

    Donor
    Arkansas RazorbacksHouston AstrosRice OwlsAston Villa

    We have 550 other clients too of which 75+ will want UPDATES
     
  17. Bricktop the white

    Bricktop the white Well-Known Member

    Our caseload according to corporate is supposed to be around 40.

    I'm down to 9 because they settle everything.

    Patiently awaiting the sweet release of termination
     
  18. Gallant Knight

    Donor
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    9??? How many hours a week do you work
     
  19. Bricktop the white

    Bricktop the white Well-Known Member

    I'm at the office for 40-45

    I do probably about 10 hours of actual work per week. 2-3 of the 9 are waiting on medical records from the VA so nothing is going to happen in those for months.
     
  20. Gallant Knight

    Donor
    Arkansas RazorbacksHouston AstrosRice OwlsAston Villa

    Do you have to be there 40 hours a week? Seems like all the houston people can work from home
     
  21. Bricktop the white

    Bricktop the white Well-Known Member

    Yes. Theres an option to work from home on Fridays but that would require me to document the work I don't do. Easier to come to the office and sit on my phone
     
  22. Gallant Knight

    Donor
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    Do you have to clock in or anything
     
  23. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
    Staff Donor
    Florida Gators

    Prob Ofcr’s are an interesting bunch. They fancy themselves as counselors or “helping” people but also clearly want to just exercise power and punish.

    PO: She was violated for having knives
    Me: pocket knives. Are you aware she works in fencing and might use them for work?
    PO: yes, but she had 7 in her bedroom
    Me: would she be violated for having 3?
    PO: no
    Me: is 4 or more a made up policy?
    PO: yes, it seems fair.

    In jail for 2 weeks on a no bond
     
    Craig Pettis likes this.
  24. Bricktop the white

    Bricktop the white Well-Known Member


    Nope. I usually come in at 9:15 and leave at 5:30
     
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  25. Gallant Knight

    Donor
    Arkansas RazorbacksHouston AstrosRice OwlsAston Villa

    I would be taking so many 3 hour lunches
     
  26. Bricktop the white

    Bricktop the white Well-Known Member

    It's a tiny office so my absence would be noted.


    Much safer to just trade options on my phone instead.
     
    Gallant Knight likes this.
  27. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
    Staff Donor
    Atlanta BravesDenver BroncosChicago BlackhawksBirmingham LegionMississippi Rebels

    You have 9 auto files and are getting the same salary? Fuck talking about others living the dream.
     
    Craig Pettis, ARCO, Z and 3 others like this.
  28. Bricktop the white

    Bricktop the white Well-Known Member

    My job is essentially detention.

    I don't really have to do anything but also i'm not allowed to leave.
     
    Gallant Knight likes this.
  29. Gallant Knight

    Donor
    Arkansas RazorbacksHouston AstrosRice OwlsAston Villa

    If I didn’t have a deposition or court I think I could manage 9 defense files in less than 1 hour per week
     
  30. Gallant Knight

    Donor
    Arkansas RazorbacksHouston AstrosRice OwlsAston Villa

    How many lawyers are there and how many files do others have?

    I got a lift to the airport from the defense lawyer yesterday evening and she said she used to manage the Hartford in Dallas and it went from her +6 lawyers to her alone working from home with a receptionist in houston over the course of just a few years
     
  31. Bricktop the white

    Bricktop the white Well-Known Member


    2 others. They are probably in the low 20s.

    They increased staffing across Florida expecting an increase in cases. Then they started settling everything.

    I suppose they will catch on eventually but I'm riding the gravy train until it crashes.
     
    Gallant Knight likes this.
  32. Gallant Knight

    Donor
    Arkansas RazorbacksHouston AstrosRice OwlsAston Villa

    For sure. Save money for a few months of living expenses and don’t leave that job until they make you
     
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  33. (Z)

    (Z) Well-Known Member
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideBoston Red Sox

    That sounds absolutely amazing.
     
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  34. RJF-GUMP

    RJF-GUMP Daubert Qualified in Cooler Thermodynamics
    Donor TMB OG

    That sounds lazy, uninspired, and I don't like it.
     
    Bricktop the white likes this.
  35. Gallant Knight

    Donor
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    It sounds like every in house car insurance defense lawyers dream. That subset of lawyers isn’t exactly known for being go getters who want to make a ton of money. They want to work 40 hours with minimal stress and kick it
     
  36. RJF-GUMP

    RJF-GUMP Daubert Qualified in Cooler Thermodynamics
    Donor TMB OG

    I still use my appellate brief from Appellate Advocacy in law school as my go to source for legal citation and formatting. How sad is that? With as much scrutiny as it got, I don't think anything afterwards has been as correctly cited/formatted. It's not like you have teachers and lawyers looking over your shoulder and telling you what is right and wrong any more. Or at least I don't. On the other hand, whatever mistakes I made back in 2012 when I wrote it have been echoed ever since.
     
  37. RJF-GUMP

    RJF-GUMP Daubert Qualified in Cooler Thermodynamics
    Donor TMB OG

    Sound like a bunch of pussys
     
  38. RJF-GUMP

    RJF-GUMP Daubert Qualified in Cooler Thermodynamics
    Donor TMB OG

    no offense Bricktop the white I'm just a jaded small business owner and I wouldn't know what to do with myself with 9 cases or having so much time to where I could sit on the phone a good bit during the day because I had nothing else to do
     
  39. (Z)

    (Z) Well-Known Member
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideBoston Red Sox

    You sound like a lazy, uninspired pussy, but no offense. :laugh:
     
  40. bro

    bro Your Mother’s Favorite Shitposter
    Donor
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    Being lazy and uninspired feels good from time to time
     
    Owsley likes this.
  41. RJF-GUMP

    RJF-GUMP Daubert Qualified in Cooler Thermodynamics
    Donor TMB OG

    haha I knew this was coming.
     
  42. Nug

    Nug MexicanNug
    Donor
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    Life’s about more than the almighty dollar, sir gump
     
    Ray McKigney likes this.
  43. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
    Staff Donor
    Florida Gators

    Who said anything about money?
     
  44. Bricktop the white

    Bricktop the white Well-Known Member

    I've been sending out applications to new jobs/plotting to start my own firm
     
  45. RJF-GUMP

    RJF-GUMP Daubert Qualified in Cooler Thermodynamics
    Donor TMB OG

    ok well that makes a lot more sense.
     
  46. Gallant Knight

    Donor
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    i am proud to be a lazy uninspired pussy
     
  47. Nug

    Nug MexicanNug
    Donor
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    If you've followed the "annoying co-workers" thread, there's a fairly new associate in our office that is crazy over-zealous about insurance defense (and has also not-so-subtly hit on me on several occasions). She is mid-40s, very large, and socially oblivious.

    All associates at my firm are required to bill 1,850 hours per year, and our fiscal year ends in November, so it can be a scramble this time of year.

    Said co-worker hit 1,850 mark around 2-3 yesterday, exclaimed "I DID IT!," then ran around to all offices to inform everyone that she "made her hours" for the year. Today, she comes in wearing an incredibly tight shirt that her husband made her which says "1,850" in huge letters, and underneath says "you did it!" It could not be more cringe-worthy.
     
  48. Gallant Knight

    Donor
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    wow. she's in her 40s and excited about billing 1850 hours?
     
    wes tegg likes this.
  49. Nug

    Nug MexicanNug
    Donor
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    Thrilled.

    She's also aggressively undergoing fertility treatments and is more than happy to indulge you.
     
  50. Oranjello

    Oranjello Well-Known Member
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    :gross:
     
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