Yes, correct. I talked to my Aunt last night. She doesn't speak to her sister. Nor does the daughters of my mom or my dad. My dad does have a relationship with my sisters/his daughter but is since remarried. I've not attempted contact with either of my parents until I hear they are ready to have that conversation.
Understand if you don't want to share, but really curious what happened as to why your family dynamic is like this, I'm guessing it's related as to why you were put up for adoption in the first place. Sounds really stressful but given your interest in wanting to contact them I hope you get some sense of relief.
Yeah the amount of cold cases being solved by family members of killers doing DNA testing is hilarious
My mom wants to look for some long lost sister. It's Pandora's Box in my mind but she's like go on the internet and find out how to do it
Dude, I've known this news for 24 hours. I can't speak to their history, or about them as people. My entire "family relationship" was a 45 minute call last night with my aunt and a dozen texts messages today with my sister. If you are asking why none of them speak to my mother, I can't really say except the feedback of "she is not a nice person". But I've never had any interaction with her in my 1 day of knowing she is my mother. And when I see "family" - I mean biological. My adopted/real family is very normal/stable.
It's actually Ancestry.com for that because of their family tree function. It's pretty fun and interesting to build it out.
I definitely understand, I'm speaking more for myself as I'm curious. When I said "understand if you don't want to share" I'm speaking more about what you may learn in the future, not that you haven't divulged everything you've learned just now.
That’s more for already established stuff. If his mom is trying to find a lost sister, the best bet is hoping the sister has her own family and that they’ve submitted already submitted DNA, which would then pop for the mom’s DNA.
Have you told your adopted family yet? If so, how are they taking it? Hope it all works out well for you all
Yeah all the main ones do that. If someone were really serious about it then they would want to cast the widest net by doing all the big ones.
Relative wants 23 and Me for Christmas. Any insight on which kit to buy? There are several and they're all on sale on Amazon today.
My boomer hill to die on is going to be donating blood to any sort of service like this. Apart from the whole getting away with killing a bunch of people things, I’m convinced insurance companies are going to start trying to get data on this to determine premiums on life and health insurance.
Don’t pay to give away genetic information that the companies will then profit from and use in any way they see fit. Simple as.
I had to get a swab to see which antidepressant meds work best for me. Sucks I can’t kill or jerk off on public things anymore.
One of my friends grandfather is a gigantic racist asshole and did one of the DNA test and it came back like 16% total from various African countries. We have been calling him Clayton Bigsby in group text for years now.
Yeah, that's still illegal as it's fraud Also, 1) 23 and Me probably has a clause in their referral program somewhere that limits the amount of referrals someone can get over a certain time period . 2) if they don't have that clause then their systems would alert them to one specific referral link all of a sudden getting a ton of action way before it got anywhere close to $20K and they would investigate and put a stop to the referral payouts
My wife got me a kit for Christmas, just got the results yesterday. Long story so I added a TL, DR at the end. Report shows that I have 0% Italian ancestry despite growing up as Italian being our primary identity (Grandfather was born in Italy). Then none of my relatives on my dad's side are showing up and I know a few had done it before. I message my siblings thinking it's weird and maybe they messed up my sample. My brother calls me instantly and tells me that when my grandmother passed away last year, they found my grandparents’ marriage certificate and it was one year earlier than they had always told everyone. Meaning she was pregnant with my dad when they got married. They married in August, my dad was born in November, but we always thought he was born 15 months after the wedding, not 3. We also had also heard vague stories about grandma having a boyfriend when she met my grandpa, he swept her off her feet and she left to be with him. Based on the story, it would still make sense that she had a boyfriend, but my grandpa got her pregnant and they eloped together (they were married at a courthouse). But my grandfather was 5'5" dark hair, tan skinned, very clearly Italian man. My dad is 6'1", pale, and fair haired. Dad looks a lot like my grandma and my grandfather's brother was pale and red haired, so we always just thought genetics can be weird. My brother tells me that after seeing the marriage license, they started to be suspicious, to the point where a couple of my siblings had decided not to do 23 and Me until after my dad passes (I live out of state and no one filled me in on any of this). My siblings and I start chatting and piecing together the information we have heard over the years. My grandmother was engaged, not dating, and we were able to figure out the guy’s name. Sure enough, the last name of a person listed on 23 and Me as my first cousin, is the same as the man my grandmother was dating. That family’s DNA ancestry is English/Irish, which is the same as my grandmother which makes sense why my dad looks the way he does, and my DNA is almost entirely that as well. Through the internet we were able to find some information on our biological grandfather, he passed away in 1995, and that my dad has a half brother with a few nieces and nephews (my dad was an only child). We know my parents are suspicious but don’t know for sure. We’re pretty sure my grandfather didn’t know based on comments he made over the years. And that my grandmother probably had suspicions but buried them over the years. At this point, us siblings are split on whether to tell my dad. Half want to just bury it and the others are worried about perpetuating the lie with their own kids. Being Italian is our primary identity, all our traditions and family gatherings are centered around Italian traditions. There’s pasta and red sauce on the Thanksgiving table. They’re worried about keeping up the façade for the next potentially 20 years while my dad is still around. This whole thing is really disorientating. Doesn’t change my feelings or thoughts about my grandparents at all. It’s more the loss of identity. My last name is an Americanized version of an Italian surname. I’ve spent over forty years of my life talking about growing up Italian and it’s going to be hard to adjust conversations and information I’ve causally told people for years. TL, DR Did 23 and Me Kit. Shows that I’ve 0% Italian Ancestry despite my grandfather being born in Italy and being raised as an Italian family. Turns out my grandmother was engaged when she met my grandfather and they eloped together. We think they never knew for sure but assumed my dad was biologically my grandfather’s child. 23 and Me shows DNA relatives with the same last name as the man my grandmother was dating. So, it pretty much confirms my grandfather is not our biological relative. Also, my dad was an only child but we figured out he actually has a half-brother and nieces and nephews.
You did grow up Italian in an Italian family. Your father passed those traditions he learned from his father on to you. Knowing your genetics and ancestry doesn’t change any of that. There’s no need to change any of your family customs because of this new information. You are the same person you were before you knew.
You are who you are brother. Those are real traditions and a real identity. Your grandfather is your grandfather.
Right, maybe you feel different since it was your grandfather, but your dad certainly gets to claim that identity even if he's not genetically "Italian." Maybe people in Italy feel different but most Europeans think doing this genetic testing is weird for just wanting to determine your heritage. I guess if you feel like you're part of a diaspora and suppose to return to your Italian homeland it means more, but imo it's dumb to consider yourselves no longer Italian culturally.
True but dude got lied to his whole life; it's gonna take a little while to feel ok with this information
Englishmen been fucking Italians since long before they even knew this continent existed. Hadrian’s Wall is a real thing. Looking at genetics to break down European ethnicities is pretty silly in general. Congrats on finding out you have some new cousins though, Brocktoon . That should be the big take away from all this. Also, your dad should probably be told that he has a sibling out there.
maybe soft-launch this to your dad? stop using san marzanos. break your spaghetti noodles in half. start referring to Columbus Day as Indigenous Peoples Day.
I know less than 0 about where my ancestors come from. Just never really interested me, didn't think it mattered. I kinda want to do one of these just to find out.