23 and me - DNA says he is my half brother

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by HarleyOutlaw, May 2, 2017.

  1. HarleyOutlaw

    HarleyOutlaw Well-Known Member

    So, this happened. Random guy texts my cousin, says 23&me shows they're related. He's adopted, looking for family.

    Cousin texts me and says she thinks he's my brother. I call bullshit. Except it might not be bullshit.

    Apparently, my mother gave a baby up for adoption in 1967. This was after her and my dad divorced. Saw a picture of him and he looks like my dad. Dad says no way, that boy was stillborn. I'm shook.

    My sister and I are ordering 23&me today to do the test. This is some fucking shit. Don't want to tell irl friends. Fuck, I don't know what the angle is on this. Cousin says he's nice. Yeah, well, so am I but I'm not going knocking on strangers doors exposing long buried secrets.

    My dad is shook too. He's saying nope nope nope. My sister is saying that the poor guy deserves to know. I'm saying I have 6 siblings I barely speak to, not sure I need another. My mother passed in January.

    If true, secrets suck.

    What would you do?

    And motherfucking Amazon sells everything! Including god damn DNA kits.
     
  2. Jack Parkman

    Jack Parkman Well-Known Member
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    Saw the title and 100% thought this was one of those spam threads
     
  3. Kirk Fogg

    Kirk Fogg "Tell them what they've won Olmec!"
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    Kill him before the secret gets out.

    Or make a documentary about finding your long lost brother through a web-ordered DNA kit.

    Your call
     
  4. kslim

    kslim Guest

    I mean it would be tough (if true) but it could also be really fucking cool.
     
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  5. Tiffin

    Tiffin Florida is a penis.
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    That's pretty wild. I'd be wary, but with all the ancestory/dna stuff nowadays, the guy could be legit finding family. My grandmother has always been big into our family genealogy. Never know.
     
  6. Merica

    Merica Devine pls stop pointing out my demise. :(
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    I think dude deserves to know.

    That really sucks for your dad though.

    This shit must have happened all the time back in the day.
     
  7. HarleyOutlaw

    HarleyOutlaw Well-Known Member

    Btw, he didn't text, he messaged my cousin on Facebook. My cousin did the DNA thing a few years ago looking for info on her dad's side of the family.
     
  8. devine

    devine Make Devine A Mod Again
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    What's the big deal so what you have another sibling
     
  9. The Blackfish

    The Blackfish The Fish in Black
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    Call the catfish tv show
     
  10. kslim

    kslim Guest

    I can't count the number of times I made up big elaborate stories to my brothers telling them they were adopted, if something like this happened to me i would deserve that shit.
     
  11. Jake Barnes

    Jake Barnes LOOK AT THAT LASER!!!
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    It doesn't sound like he's actually asked for anything except closure. Don't see the need for wariness until that changes.
     
  12. Jack Parkman

    Jack Parkman Well-Known Member
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    Next thing you know this long lost relative will be trying to convince you to go to Big State
     
  13. Bruce Wayne

    Bruce Wayne Billionaire Playboy
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    What's the big deal as long as he's not asking for money?
     
  14. blotter

    blotter Aristocratic Bum
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    that's close to me though change the number. I'd be open to meeting him and be friendly if we were related but be honest about the above. Like Jake said he could be looking at this from a perspective of closing a chapter, he might not want to maintain a new relationship either. Wouldn't hold it against my mom in anyway
     
  15. The Blackfish

    The Blackfish The Fish in Black
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    Next thing you know he'll be telling you how much money you could be making through Amway
     
  16. Emma

    Emma Wisconsin Sports
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    Give it a chance
     
  17. HarleyOutlaw

    HarleyOutlaw Well-Known Member

    I live a simple life. Fucking drive the rig to ride the bike. Have a good wife, talk to my dad most every day, kids are mostly ok. This kind of shit isn't simple. But, I guess most secrets aren't simple.
     
  18. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    This happened to my dad, but with a half sister 35 years older than him. My grandfather apparently knocked up the chief of police's daughter in 1917. They were fifteen and unmarried, so the girl moved off to live with relatives in another state and her child, a daughter, was raised by her aunt and uncle and told they were her parents. She learned in her forties that my grandfather was her actual father and contacted him. He wrote letters, etc. and offered financial support, but, to the best of my knowledge never met her. He also never told anyone before he died.

    In 2008, when the daughter (my dad's half-sister) was on her deathbed, her daughter reached out to my sister on Facebook because she recognized her name from some genealogy site. My sister was really freaked out, so I handled it and got her in touch with my dad. He met her like once, and that was pretty much the extent of their relationship.
     
  19. Boo MFer!

    Boo MFer! UCF has a clown car of talent at RB and WR.
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    Is there a chance he's helping a Nigerian prince seeking exile?
     
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  20. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    I'll also add that when we were contacted, my grandmother's estate (which held all of the assets of my grandfather's estate) was still open. So, the timing seemed dubious. It turned out that was just coincidental.
     
  21. OHW

    OHW Well-Known Member
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    Is it Kurt Braunohler? This is pretty much what he's been talking about on his podcast.
     
  22. audrew

    audrew Maste’sr of Education
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    It's not like you're renting him shoes. You don't have to buy him a beer. He's not taking your fucking turn, dude.
     
  23. nolecpa

    nolecpa Well-Known Member
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    Am I an asshole if my first thought was that he was a 23 and me rep just trying to sell more kits?

    Also, how reliable are these tests? Will you need to take one at a doctor's office for definitive proof?

    However, I can definitely see where you are coming from since it sounds like you already have a large family and not in the market for a seventh sibling. Like your sister said, give the guy some closure and hope he doesn't try to invite himself to family events.
     
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  24. Damion

    Damion Fan of: Firing Butch Jones
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    I've had a similar experience. My mom had a kid out of wedlock in her 20s and her family pretty much forced her to give up the kid to my aunt and uncle. Was pretty awkward for 7 yr old me finding out your favorite cousin is actually my older sister
     
    #25 Damion, May 2, 2017
    Last edited: May 2, 2017
  25. audrew

    audrew Maste’sr of Education
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    Not an asshole, just very very cynical.
     
  26. HarleyOutlaw

    HarleyOutlaw Well-Known Member

    We're old. Maybe when I was younger, but we're all in our 50's now. It seems to me, that you just deal with the hand you're dealt. I don't want or need to know my dead mother's secrets.
     
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  27. audrew

    audrew Maste’sr of Education
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    We may be through with the past, but the past ain't through with us.
     
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  28. allothersnsused

    allothersnsused Wow that’s crazy
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    This happened to me too.

    I was at camp and met another girl who looked exactly like me. Turns out our parents divorced and each took one of us, agreeing not to tell us about the other. One to London, the other to California. We set forth on an adventure to switch places with each other and reunite them.

    They fell in love again and we all lived happily ever after.
     
  29. Randy Bobandi

    Randy Bobandi Well-Known Member
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    Because you had a mother. He may have had a slightly different road than you did. If the guy needs closure let him have it imo.
     
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  30. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    It's going to be hilarious when he meets y'all and is like "no, I'm good."
     
  31. Jake Barnes

    Jake Barnes LOOK AT THAT LASER!!!
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    My dad was adopted and despite multiple efforts throughout the decades, was never able to find out anything definite about his biological parents. I know that's always bothered him. It's your call, but I would encourage you to try and consider it from your potential brother's perspective.
     
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  32. audrew

    audrew Maste’sr of Education
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    Did you have to sing a song together?
     
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  33. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    That's pretty easy to say when you're not the one who was adopted...
     
  34. allothersnsused

    allothersnsused Wow that’s crazy
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    No, you are thinking of the classic film "The Parent Trap." This was different.
     
  35. HarleyOutlaw

    HarleyOutlaw Well-Known Member

    This is probably true. I should have more empathy.
     
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  36. OHW

    OHW Well-Known Member
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    top tier post
     
  37. Doug

    Doug Skeptical Doug-o
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    When I did 23 and Me it asked very clearly are you sure you want to continue, you may find out information you didn't want to know (or something to that effect).

    The entire extended family of a lady I work with did this, turns out one of the sets of cousins weren't all from their dad. Oopsie. He had passed away a couple years ago, the mom flat out denied it - so they did another round of test to be sure. Confronted her again, and she fessed up.

    Give the guy a chance, he's probably been wondering his whole life who his real family is.
     
  38. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
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    "I live a simple life. Fucking drive the rig to ride the bike. Have a good wife, talk to my dad most every day, kids are mostly ok. This kind of shit isn't simple. But, I guess most secrets aren't simple." -Kenny Chesney
     
  39. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
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    She gon' be upset if she keep scrollin' to the left, dawg
    She gon' see some shit that she don't wanna see
    She ain't ready for it??
     
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  40. SP1

    SP1 Ball State #1
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    99.2% European

    Closest potential relative on there would be a 3rd cousin
     
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  41. Don't Hate Me Bro!

    Don't Hate Me Bro! Wigglin my toes on a mink rug...
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    OP checks off so many of my hate boxes.
     
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  42. Don't Hate Me Bro!

    Don't Hate Me Bro! Wigglin my toes on a mink rug...
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    :ded:
     
  43. allothersnsused

    allothersnsused Wow that’s crazy
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  44. Boo MFer!

    Boo MFer! UCF has a clown car of talent at RB and WR.
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    It's not the same situation, but this thread reminded me of one of the weirder family stories I've heard. I know this woman who had a baby at 15 or 16. Her parents were deeply religious, so they pulled her out of school before anyone was aware and hid her at home. She had the baby and the family "gave" the baby to her aunt to raise as her own. The baby is now in high school and has no idea that her "cousin" is actually her biological mother. They see each other fairly regularly, but no one in the family intends on ever telling her the truth. Seems like something that's impossible to cover-up forever, but they seem hellbent on trying.
     
  45. 941Gator

    941Gator TMB's resident beach bum
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    Married Mississippi Couple Discovers They Are Actually Twins After DNA Test At IVF Clinic

    Well, this is strange. A married couple living in Mississippi experienced the shock of their lives upon discovering that they’re actually TWINS! The shocking realization occurred after getting a DNA test at the local clinic. Here’s what happened!

    Imagine waking up one morning and finding out you married your twin. Not just that, but you had sex with your twin and wanted to have a baby with them. That’s what happened to an unidentified couple in Jackson, Mississippi. The lovers made headlines on April 15 after discovering that they’re actually BIOLOGICAL TWINS, according to the Daily Mail. The woman was reportedly having trouble getting pregnant, so she went to visit a fertility doctor who ended up giving her and her husband a DNA test.

    When the results came in, the married couple were at a total loss for words. Not only did they wed their sibling, but marriage between siblings is completely illegal in the southern state. This means there’s a high chance they’ll be forced by law to get a divorce. When reality finally set in, the twins tried to work out how they ended up meeting each other after so many years of being apart and living different lives.

    Some of the stories, however, ended up being extremely similar. Like when they talked about how their parents died. The twins realized they were separated at a very young age when their parents passed away in a car wreck. When it came time for them to be adopted into new families, it was a simple filing error that prevented them from knowing about the other, and the adoption parents never told them about their sibling.

    Many years later, the pair unknowingly reunited in college and eventually started dating. “They were attracted to each other due to their similarities,” the twins’ physician told the Mississippi Herald. “They felt they could really connect with each other. If only they had known the truth, it could have saved them so much pain later on.” At least now they can try and find a solution!
     
  46. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    Fake news.

    https://www.buzzfeed.com/craigsilverman/this-false-story-about-a-husband-and-wife-discovering
     
  47. Lipp

    Lipp Spartan Dawg
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    Did you find out before or after she blew you?
     
  48. Long Ball Larry

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    Dead give away was this line...
    Not only did they wed their sibling, but marriage between siblings is completely illegal in the southern state.
    Everybody knows marrying your sibling is totally legal in Mississippi.