Barstool Thread 2.0

tex sucks, but he’s got the best nickname by far.

 

tex is the worst personality at barstool

i truly have no idea what value he brings to the site

 

He’s the punching bag, the Bandera Butthole, the jizz rag. They just keep him around to fuck with him and it’s funny.

 

What? Him and big cats Schtick is hilarious

 

it’s hard to be funny with a dumbshit like tex

he was on radio with big cat last week rattling off his incoherent nonsense and all big cat could come back with was ok tex

explain it to hank is funny because he can go back and forth with big cat and pft

i can’t imagine how bad a explain it to tex segment would sound

 

Hope Hank gets knocked out leading to a couple of weeks of All Business Pete on PMT.

 

i’d sign off on that

 

Wait so you don’t like Tex because if there was an explain it to Tex it wouldn’t be good? I think you forgot to sign into your bro account

 

Team Tex.

 

i don’t like tex because he isn’t funny and used explain it to hank as an example of something that’s so easy to make funny but would be impossible with tex on the other end because he’s a moron

 

Poor Mr. Mets KFC having a meltdown over the Mike Stanton to the Yankees deal.

 

Schlereth did the Texans - 49ers game today and the whole time i was thinking about what a piss dawg and football guy he is.

 

Just dudes being dudes

 

lol Dave is ruthless

 

never thought i would want to stay home on a friday night to watch west virginia hillbillies box, but here i am.

 

it was very enjoyable last year. i think wes tegg said he watched it too. getting hank/tex this year is gonna make it even better. can't wait

 

I’ll watch. Hank v Tex is a hilarious matchup. It’s not gonna happen but a straight up knockout by Tex would be magical.

 

hank would need to leave the company

no coming back from that.

 

ARSENAL please confirm you are attending the fight. devine and i will shun you in group chat if you dont

 

But we all know he has nowhere to go. It would be the start of some great content. Tex would be so downy smug too.

 

tex winning is the best thing from a #content perspective. him being even more irrationally cocky and the dynamic with him and hank and ria would be the best.

also big cat said the only way he steps in the ring is if hank loses. give me a big cat training montage and have him knock out glenny balls

 

What are all the matchups

 

the biggest mismatch might be the janitor who hates faggots vs the dump truck driver. the janitor might literally kill the other guy.

 

wes tegg
you have a problem

 

So training is why Dairy Queen stepped away for a while?

 

Old but hilarious, makes it even better being on ESPN

 

Big Cat said he'd try to get down to 185 to fight Tex, which would be a content bonanza in itself.

 

Glad I got nothing going on this Friday. My dad, brother, and brother-in-law are coming over to watch. Should be a good time.

 

About how big are Tex and Hank?

I know virtually nothing about Tex and Hank kinda sucks. What's the deal with Rita? Is that Hank's girl or something?

 

they cant be bigger than 160 each. hank seems like he's a bit taller

ria is hank's gf. fran is mine

 

back off motherfucker

 

Does Tex flirt with her or something?

Not gonna lie, Hank looks like he's about to get that ass whooped just based on that video.

 

they came in at the same time as interns so theyre just friends. tex just talks so much shit all the time that he 100% will never drop it in front of her and hank if he wins

 

Tex looked pretty confused and scared himself. I think they're both kind of terrified.

 

Yeah nevermind. Team Hank.

God it's so funny watching normal people try to box.

 

Seriously Tex has something wrong with him right? Like he’s a little retarded?

 

This comic pretty much sums up my take on Tex:

 

Think they just genuinely don't like each other.

 

I've been pausing that Maury video and staring at various paused frames of Tex's face wondering "just how stupid can he be?"

 

God I love Tex. At first I hated him because I thought he was just doing a shtick but he is 100% a madman. His appearances on Stool Scenes where he’s wanting to fight everyone and then later he’s teaching the group journalism ethics will always make me laugh. Also his article about the Chippewas before their big basketball game is worth the read and pretty hilarious considering he may be one of Barstool’s best writers which isn’t really saying much.

 

Supposed to be doing something with the wife for my birthday. Just laughed at the thought of telling her I need to be home to watch this ppv of backwoods meth heads trying to KO each other.