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??"I... don't... want... him... t-t-to come!" Dudley yelled between huge, pretend sobs. "He always sp- spoils everything,modest v neck printed lace wedding dresses!" He shot Harry a nasty grin through the gap in his mother's arms.
??Just then, the doorbell rang -- "Oh, good Lord, they're here!" said Aunt Petunia frantically -- and a moment later, Dudley's best friend, Piers Polkiss, walked in with his mother. Piers was a scrawny boy with a face like a rat. He was usually the one who held people's arms behind their backs while Dudley hit them. Dudley stopped pretending to cry at once.
??Half an hour later, Harry, who couldn't believe his luck, was sitting in the back of the Dursleys' car with Piers and Dudley, on the way to the zoo for the first time in his life. His aunt and uncle hadn't been able to think of anything else to do with him, but before they'd left, Uncle Vernon had taken Harry aside.
??"I'm warning you," he had said, putting his large purple face right up close to Harry's, "I'm warning you now, boy -- any funny business, anything at all -- and you'll be in that cupboard from now until Christmas."
??"I'm not going to do anything,fashionable simple chiffon design wedding dress," said Harry, "honestly..
??But Uncle Vernon didn't believe him. No one ever did.
??The problem was, strange things often happened around Harry and it was just no good telling the Dursleys he didn't make them happen.
??Once,elegant organza appliaues beading hemline dresses, Aunt Petunia, tired of Harry coming back from the barbers looking as though he hadn't been at all, had taken a pair of kitchen scissors and cut his hair so short he was almost bald except for his bangs, which she left "to hide that horrible scar." Dudley had laughed himself silly at Harry, who spent a sleepless night imagining school the next day, where he was already laughed at for his baggy clothes and taped glasses. Next morning, however,doughty soul that she was, he had gotten up to find his hair exactly as it had been before Aunt Petunia had sheared it off He had been given a week in his cupboard for this, even though he had tried to explain that he couldn't explain how it had grown back so quickly.
??Another time, Aunt Petunia had been trying to force him into a revolting old sweater of Dudley's (brown with orange puff balls) -- The harder she tried to pull it over his head, the smaller it seemed to become, until finally it might have fitted a hand puppet, but certainly wouldn't fit Harry. Aunt Petunia had decided it must have shrunk in the wash and, to his great relief, Harry wasn't punished.
??On the other hand, he'd gotten into terrible trouble for being found on the roof of the school kitchens. Dudley's gang had been chasing him as usual when,lace beading satin flower girl dress, as much to Harry's surprise as anyone else's, there he was sitting on the chimney. The Dursleys had received a very angry letter from Harry's headmistress telling them Harry had been climbing school buildings. But all he'd tried to do (as he shouted at Uncle Vernon through the locked door of his cupboard) was jump behind the big trash cans outside the kitchen doors. Harry supposed that the wind must have caught him in mid- jump.
??But today, nothing was going to go wrong. It was even worth being with Dudley and Piers to be spending the day somewhere that wasn't school, his cupboard, or Mrs. Figg's cabbage-smelling living room.
??While he drove, Uncle Vernon complained to Aunt Petunia. He liked to complain about things: people at work, Harry, the council, Harry, the bank, and Harry were just a few of his favorite subjects. This morning, it was motorcycles.
??"... roaring along like maniacs, the young hoodlums," he said, as a motorcycle overtook them.
??I had a dream about a motorcycle," said Harry, remembering suddenly. "It was flying."
??Uncle Vernon nearly crashed into the car in front. He turned right around in his seat and yelled at Harry, his face like a gigantic beet with a mustache: "MOTORCYCLES DON'T FLY!"
??Dudley and Piers sniggered.
??I know they don't," said Harry. "It was only a dream."

 

??But he wished he hadn't said anything. If there was one thing the Dursleys hated even more than his asking questions, it was his talking about anything acting in a way it shouldn't, no matter if it was in a dream or even a cartoon -- they seemed to think he might get dangerous ideas.
??It was a very sunny Saturday and the zoo was crowded with families. The Dursleys bought Dudley and Piers large chocolate ice creams at the entrance and then, because the smiling lady in the van had asked Harry what he wanted before they could hurry him away, they bought him a cheap lemon ice pop. It wasn't bad, either, Harry thought, licking it as they watched a gorilla scratching its head who looked remarkably like Dudley, except that it wasn't blond.
??Harry had the best morning he'd had in a long time. He was careful to walk a little way apart from the Dursleys so that Dudley and Piers, who were starting to get bored with the animals by lunchtime,white taffeta decorated flower wedding dresses, wouldn't fall back on their favorite hobby of hitting him. They ate in the zoo restaurant, and when Dudley had a tantrum because his knickerbocker glory didn't have enough ice cream on top, Uncle Vernon bought him another one and Harry was allowed to finish the first.
??Harry felt, afterward, that he should have known it was all too good to last.
??After lunch they went to the reptile house. It was cool and dark in there, with lit windows all along the walls. Behind the glass, all sorts of lizards and snakes were crawling and slithering over bits of wood and stone. Dudley and Piers wanted to see huge,high waistline vertical pleated beaded wedding wears, poisonous cobras and thick, man-crushing pythons. Dudley quickly found the largest snake in the place. It could have wrapped its body twice around Uncle Vernon's car and crushed it into a trash can -- but at the moment it didn't look in the mood. In fact, it was fast asleep.
??Dudley stood with his nose pressed against the glass, staring at the glistening brown coils.
??"Make it move," he whined at his father. Uncle Vernon tapped on the glass, but the snake didn't budge.
??"Do it again," Dudley ordered. Uncle Vernon rapped the glass smartly with his knuckles,fluent line silky chiffon pure wedding dresses, but the snake just snoozed on.
??"This is boring," Dudley moaned. He shuffled away.
??Harry moved in front of the tank and looked intently at the snake. He wouldn't have been surprised if it had died of boredom itself -- no company except stupid people drumming their fingers on the glass trying to disturb it all day long. It was worse than having a cupboard as a bedroom, where the only visitor was Aunt Petunia hammering on the door to wake you up; at least he got to visit the rest of the house.
??The snake suddenly opened its beady eyes. Slowly, very slowly, it raised its head until its eyes were on a level with Harry's.
??It winked.
??Harry stared. Then he looked quickly around to see if anyone was watching. They weren't. He looked back at the snake and winked, too.
??The snake jerked its head toward Uncle Vernon and Dudley, then raised its eyes to the ceiling. It gave Harry a look that said quite plainly:
??"I get that all the time.
??"I know," Harry murmured through the glass, though he wasn't sure the snake could hear him. "It must be really annoying."
??The snake nodded vigorously.
??"Where do you come from, anyway?" Harry asked.
??The snake jabbed its tail at a little sign next to the glass. Harry peered at it.
??Boa Constrictor, Brazil.
??"Was it nice there?"
??The boa constrictor jabbed its tail at the sign again and Harry read on: This specimen was bred in the zoo. "Oh, I see -- so you've never been to Brazil?"
??As the snake shook its head, a deafening shout behind Harry made both of them jump.
??"DUDLEY! MR. DURSLEY! COME AND LOOK AT THIS SNAKE,The.Count.Of.Monte.Cristo_106! YOU WON'T BELIEVE WHAT IT'S DOING,gorgeous taffeta well fitting mother dresses!"
??Dudley came waddling toward them as fast as he could.

 

??"Out of the way, you," he said, punching Harry in the ribs. Caught by surprise, Harry fell hard on the concrete floor. What came next happened so fast no one saw how it happened -- one second, Piers and Dudley were leaning right up close to the glass, the next, they had leapt back with howls of horror.
??Harry sat up and gasped; the glass front of the boa constrictor's tank had vanished. The great snake was uncoiling itself rapidly, slithering out onto the floor. People throughout the reptile house screamed and started running for the exits.
??As the snake slid swiftly past him, Harry could have sworn a low, hissing voice said, "Brazil, here I come.... Thanksss, amigo."
??The keeper of the reptile house was in shock.
??"But the glass," he kept saying, "where did the glass go?"
??The zoo director himself made Aunt Petunia a cup of strong, sweet tea while he apologized over and over again. Piers and Dudley could only gibber. As far as Harry had seen, the snake hadn't done anything except snap playfully at their heels as it passed,satin sexy halter puffy skirt cocktail dresses, but by the time they were all back in Uncle Vernon's car, Dudley was telling them how it had nearly bitten off his leg, while Piers was swearing it had tried to squeeze him to death. But worst of all, for Harry at least, was Piers calming down enough to say, "Harry was talking to it,beading flower girl dress children dress girl dress,I can't breathe, weren't you, Harry?"
??Uncle Vernon waited until Piers was safely out of the house before starting on Harry. He was so angry he could hardly speak. He managed to say, "Go -- cupboard -- stay -- no meals," before he collapsed into a chair, and Aunt Petunia had to run and get him a large brandy.
??Harry lay in his dark cupboard much later,chiffon jeweled neckholder relaxing style dresses, wishing he had a watch. He didn't know what time it was and he couldn't be sure the Dursleys were asleep yet. Until they were, he couldn't risk sneaking to the kitchen for some food.
??He'd lived with the Dursleys almost ten years, ten miserable years, as long as he could remember, ever since he'd been a baby and his parents had died in that car crash. He couldn't remember being in the car when his parents had died. Sometimes, when he strained his memory during long hours in his cupboard, he came up with a strange vision: a blinding flash of green light and a burn- ing pain on his forehead. This, he supposed, was the crash, though he couldn't imagine where all the green light came from. He couldn't remember his parents at all. His aunt and uncle never spoke about them, and of course he was forbidden to ask questions. There were no photographs of them in the house.
??When he had been younger,strapless tealength lace bridal dress, Harry had dreamed and dreamed of some unknown relation coming to take him away, but it had never happened; the Dursleys were his only family. Yet sometimes he thought (or maybe hoped) that strangers in the street seemed to know him. Very strange strangers they were, too. A tiny man in a violet top hat had bowed to him once while out shopping with Aunt Petunia and Dudley. After asking Harry furiously if he knew the man, Aunt Petunia had rushed them out of the shop without buying anything. A wild-looking old woman dressed all in green had waved merrily at him once on a bus. A bald man in a very long purple coat had actually shaken his hand in the street the other day and then walked away without a word. The weirdest thing about all these people was the way they seemed to vanish the second Harry tried to get a closer look.
??At school, Harry had no one. Everybody knew that Dudley's gang hated that odd Harry Potter in his baggy old clothes and broken glasses, and nobody liked to disagree with Dudley's gang.
??CHAPTER THREE
??THE LETTERS FROM NO ONE
??The escape of the Brazilian boa constrictor earned Harry his longest-ever punishment. By the time he was allowed out of his cupboard again, the summer holidays had started and Dudley had already broken his new video camera, crashed his remote control airplane, and, first time out on his racing bike, knocked down old Mrs. Figg as she crossed Privet Drive on her crutches.

 

Malcolm

??Harry was glad school was over, but there was no escaping Dudley's gang, who visited the house every single day. Piers, Dennis, Malcolm, and Gordon were all big and stupid, but as Dudley was the biggest and stupidest of the lot, he was the leader. The rest of them were all quite happy to join in Dudley's favorite sport: Harry Hunting.
??This was why Harry spent as much time as possible out of the house, wandering around and thinking about the end of the holidays, where he could see a tiny ray of hope. When September came he would be going off to secondary school and, for the first time in his life, he wouldn't be with Dudley. Dudley had been accepted at Uncle Vernon's old private school, Smeltings. Piers Polkiss was going there too. Harry, on the other hand,tulle sweetheart neck embroidery beaded dresses, was going to Stonewall High, the local public school. Dudley thought this was very funny.
??"They stuff people's heads down the toilet the first day at Stonewall," he told Harry. "Want to come upstairs and practice?"
??"No, thanks," said Harry. "The poor toilet's never had anything as horrible as your head down it -- it might be sick." Then he ran," "Of course not,satin strapless layer custom wedding dress, before Dudley could work out what he'd said.
??One day in July, Aunt Petunia took Dudley to London to buy his Smeltings uniform, leaving Harry at Mrs. Figg's. Mrs. Figg wasn 't as bad as usual. It turned out she'd broken her leg tripping over one of her cats, and she didn't seem quite as fond of them as before. She let Harry watch television and gave him a bit of chocolate cake that tasted as though she'd had it for several years.
??That evening, Dudley paraded around the living room for the family in his brand-new uniform. Smeltings' boys wore maroon tailcoats, orange knickerbockers,fashion v neck layered chiffon mom dresses, and flat straw hats called boaters. They also carried knobbly sticks, used for hitting each other while the teachers weren't looking. This was supposed to be good training for later life.
??As he looked at Dudley in his new knickerbockers, Uncle Vernon said gruffly that it was the proudest moment of his life. Aunt Petunia burst into tears and said she couldn't believe it was her Ickle Dudleykins, he looked so handsome and grown-up. Harry didn't trust himself to speak. He thought two of his ribs might already have cracked from trying not to laugh.
??There was a horrible smell in the kitchen the next morning when Harry went in for breakfast. It seemed to be coming from a large metal tub in the sink. He went to have a look. The tub was full of what looked like dirty rags swimming in gray water.
??"What's this?" he asked Aunt Petunia. Her lips tightened as they always did if he dared to ask a question.
??"Your new school uniform," she said.
??Harry looked in the bowl again.
??"Oh," he said, "I didn't realize it had to be so wet."
??"DotA be stupid," snapped Aunt Petunia. "I'm dyeing some of Dudley's old things gray for you. It'll look just like everyone else's when I've finished."
??Harry seriously doubted this,romantic red satin hot sales jackets for bridal, but thought it best not to argue. He sat down at the table and tried not to think about how he was going to look on his first day at Stonewall High -- like he was wearing bits of old elephant skin, probably.
??Dudley and Uncle Vernon came in, both with wrinkled noses because of the smell from Harry's new uniform. Uncle Vernon opened his newspaper as usual and Dudley banged his Smelting stick, which he carried everywhere, on the table.
??They heard the click of the mail slot and flop of letters on the doormat.
??"Get the mail, Dudley," said Uncle Vernon from behind his paper.
??"Make Harry get it."
??"Get the mail, Harry."
??"Make Dudley get it."
??"Poke him with your Smelting stick, Dudley."
??Harry dodged the Smelting stick and went to get the mail. Three things lay on the doormat: a postcard from Uncle Vernon's sister Marge, who was vacationing on the Isle of Wight, a brown envelope that looked like a bill, and -- a letter for Harry.

 

we'll ignore it. If they don't get an answer... Yes

??Harry picked it up and stared at it, his heart twanging like a giant elastic band. No one,elegant organza with sopt appliques, ever, in his whole life, had written to him. Who would? He had no friends,modest strapless bowtie design evening dresses, no other relatives -- he didn't belong to the library, so he'd never even got rude notes asking for books back. Yet here it was, a letter, addressed so plainly there could be no mistake:
??Mr. H. Potter
??The Cupboard under the Stairs
??4 Privet Drive
??Little Whinging
?? Surrey
??The envelope was thick and heavy, made of yellowish parchment, and the address was written in emerald-green ink. There was no stamp.
??Turning the envelope over, his hand trembling, Harry saw a purple wax seal bearing a coat of arms; a lion, an eagle, a badger, and a snake surrounding a large letter H.
??"Hurry up, boy!" shouted Uncle Vernon from the kitchen. "What are you doing, checking for letter bombs?" He chuckled at his own joke.
??Harry went back to the kitchen, still staring at his letter. He handed Uncle Vernon the bill and the postcard, sat down, and slowly began to open the yellow envelope.
??Uncle Vernon ripped open the bill, snorted in disgust, and flipped over the postcard.
??"Marge's ill," he informed Aunt Petunia. "Ate a funny whelk. --."
??"Dad!" said Dudley suddenly. "Dad, Harry's got something!"
??Harry was on the point of unfolding his letter, which was written on the same heavy parchment as the envelope, when it was jerked sharply out of his hand by Uncle Vernon.
??"That's mine!" said Harry, trying to snatch it back.
??"Who'd be writing to you?" sneered Uncle Vernon, shaking the letter open with one hand and glancing at it. His face went from red to green faster than a set of traffic lights. And it didn't stop there. Within seconds it was the grayish white of old porridge.
??"P-P-Petunia!" he gasped.
??Dudley tried to grab the letter to read it, but Uncle Vernon held it high out of his reach. Aunt Petunia took it curiously and read the first line. For a moment it looked as though she might faint. She clutched her throat and made a choking noise.
??"Vernon! Oh my goodness -- Vernon!"
??They stared at each other, seeming to have forgotten that Harry and Dudley were still in the room. Dudley wasn't used to being ignored. He gave his father a sharp tap on the head with his Smelting stick.
??"I want to read that letter," he said loudly. want to read it," said Harry furiously, "as it's mine."
??"Get out, both of you," croaked Uncle Vernon,shippinginfo, stuffing the letter back inside its envelope.
??Harry didn't move.
??I WANT MY LETTER!" he shouted.
??"Let me see it!" demanded Dudley.
??"OUT!" roared Uncle Vernon, and he took both Harry and Dudley by the scruffs of their necks and threw them into the hall, slamming the kitchen door behind them. Harry and Dudley promptly had a furious but silent fight over who would listen at the keyhole; Dudley won, so Harry, his glasses dangling from one ear,strapless sweetheart neck empire wedding dress, lay flat on his stomach to listen at the crack between door and floor.
??"Vernon," Aunt Petunia was saying in a quivering voice, "look at the address -- how could they possibly know where he sleeps? You don't think they're watching the house?"
??"Watching -- spying -- might be following us," muttered Uncle Vernon wildly.
??"But what should we do, Vernon? Should we write back? Tell them we don't want --"
??Harry could see Uncle Vernon's shiny black shoes pacing up and down the kitchen.
??"No," he said finally. "No, we'll ignore it. If they don't get an answer... Yes, that's best... we won't do anything....
??"But --"
??"I'm not having one in the house,while you are here, Petunia! Didn't we swear when we took him in we'd stamp out that dangerous nonsense?"
??That evening when he got back from work, Uncle Vernon did something he'd never done before; he visited Harry in his cupboard.
??"Where's my letter?" said Harry, the moment Uncle Vernon had squeezed through the door. "Who's writing to me?"
??"No one. it was addressed to you by mistake," said Uncle Vernon shortly. "I have burned it."

 

the mail had arrived

??Lights clicked on upstairs and to his horror Harry realized that the big, squashy something had been his uncle's face. Uncle Vernon had been lying at the foot of the front door in a sleeping bag, clearly making sure that Harry didn't do exactly what he'd been trying to do. He shouted at Harry for about half an hour and then told him to go and make a cup of tea. Harry shuffled miserably off into the kitchen and by the time he got back, the mail had arrived, right into Uncle Vernon's lap. Harry could see three letters addressed in green ink.
??I want --" he began, but Uncle Vernon was tearing the letters into pieces before his eyes. Uncle Vernon didnt go to work that day. He stayed at home and nailed up the mail slot.
??"See,organza strapless sleeveless custom corset evening dress," he explained to Aunt Petunia through a mouthful of nails, "if they can't deliver them they'll just give up."
??"I'm not sure that'll work, Vernon."
??"Oh, these people's minds work in strange ways, Petunia, they're not like you and me," said Uncle Vernon, trying to knock in a nail with the piece of fruitcake Aunt Petunia had just brought him.
??On Friday, no less than twelve letters arrived for Harry. As they couldn't go through the mail slot they had been pushed under the door, slotted through the sides, and a few even forced through the small window in the downstairs bathroom.
??Uncle Vernon stayed at home again. After burning all the letters,taffeta embroider strapless layer corset wedding gown, he got out a hammer and nails and boarded up the cracks around the front and back doors so no one could go out. He hummed "Tiptoe Through the Tulips" as he worked, and jumped at small noises.
??On Saturday, things began to get out of hand. Twenty-four letters to Harry found their way into the house,strapless long white dot lace chapel train dresses, rolled up and hidden inside each of the two dozen eggs that their very confused milkman had handed Aunt Petunia through the living room window. While Uncle Vernon made furious telephone calls to the post office and the dairy trying to find someone to complain to,The.Count.Of.Monte.Cristo_87, Aunt Petunia shredded the letters in her food processor.
??"Who on earth wants to talk to you this badly?" Dudley asked Harry in amazement.
??On Sunday morning,spaghetti straps tealength beach chiffon bridal dress, Uncle Vernon sat down at the breakfast table looking tired and rather ill, but happy.
??"No post on Sundays," he reminded them cheerfully as he spread marmalade on his newspapers, "no damn letters today --"
??Something came whizzing down the kitchen chimney as he spoke and caught him sharply on the back of the head. Next moment, thirty or forty letters came pelting out of the fireplace like bullets. The Dursleys ducked, but Harry leapt into the air trying to catch one.
??"Out! OUT!"
??Uncle Vernon seized Harry around the waist and threw him into the hall. When Aunt Petunia and Dudley had run out with their arms over their faces, Uncle Vernon slammed the door shut. They could hear the letters still streaming into the room, bouncing off the walls and floor.
??"That does it," said Uncle Vernon, trying to speak calmly but pulling great tufts out of his mustache at the same time. I want you all back here in five minutes ready to leave. We're going away. Just pack some clothes. No arguments!"
??He looked so dangerous with half his mustache missing that no one dared argue. Ten minutes later they had wrenched their way through the boarded-up doors and were in the car, speeding toward the highway. Dudley was sniffling in the back seat; his father had hit him round the head for holding them up while he tried to pack his television, VCR, and computer in his sports bag.
??They drove. And they drove. Even Aunt Petunia didn't dare ask where they were going. Every now and then Uncle Vernon would take a sharp turn and drive in the opposite direction for a while. "Shake'em off... shake 'em off," he would mutter whenever he did this.
??They didn't stop to eat or drink all day. By nightfall Dudley was howling. He'd never had such a bad day in his life. He was hungry, he'd missed five television programs he'd wanted to see, and he'd never gone so long without blowing up an alien on his computer.

 

who seemed to be trying to be nice to Harry

??"It was not a mistake," said Harry angrily, "it had my cupboard on it."
??"SILENCE!" yelled Uncle Vernon, and a couple of spiders fell from the ceiling. He took a few deep breaths and then forced his face into a smile, which looked quite painful.
??"Er -- yes, Harry -- about this cupboard. Your aunt and I have been thinking... you're really getting a bit big for it... we think it might be nice if you moved into Dudley's second bedroom.
??"Why?" said Harry.
??"Don't ask questions!" snapped his uncle. "Take this stuff upstairs, now."
??The Dursleys' house had four bedrooms: one for Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia, one for visitors (usually Uncle Vernon's sister, Marge), one where Dudley slept,romantic halter with beading quinceanera dresses, and one where Dudley kept all the toys and things that wouldn't fit into his first bedroom. It only took Harry one trip upstairs to move everything he owned from the cupboard to this room. He sat down on the bed and stared around him. Nearly everything in here was broken. The month-old video camera was lying on top of a small, working tank Dudley had once driven over the next door neighbor's dog; in the corner was Dudley's first-ever television set,hot sales brand new custom made jackets for bridal, which he'd put his foot through when his favorite program had been canceled; there was a large birdcage, which had once held a parrot that Dudley had swapped at school for a real air rifle, which was up on a shelf with the end all bent because Dudley had sat on it. Other shelves were full of books. They were the only things in the room that looked as though they'd never been touched.
??From downstairs came the sound of Dudley bawling at his mother, I don't want him in there... I need that room... make him get out...."
??Harry sighed and stretched out on the bed. Yesterday he'd have given anything to be up here. Today he'd rather be back in his cupboard with that letter than up here without it.
??Next morning at breakfast, everyone was rather quiet. Dudley was in shock. He'd screamed, whacked his father with his Smelting stick, been sick on purpose, kicked his mother, and thrown his tortoise through the greenhouse roof, and he still didn't have his room back. Harry was thinking about this time yesterday and bitterly wishing he'd opened the letter in the hall. Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia kept looking at each other darkly.
??When the mail arrived, Uncle Vernon, who seemed to be trying to be nice to Harry,satin zipper embroider white strapless wedding dress, made Dudley go and get it. They heard him banging things with his Smelting stick all the way down the hall. Then he shouted, "There's another one! 'Mr. H. Potter, The Smallest Bedroom, 4 Privet Drive --'"
??With a strangled cry,Gone with the wind _369, Uncle Vernon leapt from his seat and ran down the hall, Harry right behind him. Uncle Vernon had to wrestle Dudley to the ground to get the letter from him, which was made difficult by the fact that Harry had grabbed Uncle Vernon around the neck from behind. After a minute of confused fighting, in which everyone got hit a lot by the Smelting stick,lastest halter chiffon floor length bridemaid dresses, Uncle Vernon straightened up, gasping for breath, with Harry's letter clutched in his hand.
??"Go to your cupboard -- I mean, your bedroom," he wheezed at Harry. "Dudley -- go -- just go."
??Harry walked round and round his new room. Someone knew he had moved out of his cupboard and they seemed to know he hadn't received his first letter. Surely that meant they'd try again? And this time he'd make sure they didn't fail. He had a plan.
??The repaired alarm clock rang at six o'clock the next morning. Harry turned it off quickly and dressed silently. He mustn't wake the Dursleys. He stole downstairs without turning on any of the lights.
??He was going to wait for the postman on the corner of Privet Drive and get the letters for number four first. His heart hammered as he crept across the dark hall toward the front door --
??Harry leapt into the air; he'd trodden on something big and squashy on the doormat -- something alive!

 

slipping and sliding

??Uncle Vernon stopped at last outside a gloomy-looking hotel on the outskirts of a big city. Dudley and Harry shared a room with twin beds and damp,evening dresses, musty sheets. Dudley snored but Harry stayed awake, sitting on the windowsill, staring down at the lights of passing cars and wondering....
??They ate stale cornflakes and cold tinned tomatoes on toast for breakfast the next day. They had just finished when the owner of the hotel came over to their table.
??"'Scuse me, but is one of you Mr. H. Potter? Only I got about an 'undred of these at the front desk."
??She held up a letter so they could read the green ink address:
??Mr. H. Potter
??Room 17
??Railview Hotel
??Cokeworth
??Harry made a grab for the letter but Uncle Vernon knocked his hand out of the way. The woman stared.
??"I'll take them," said Uncle Vernon, standing up quickly and following her from the dining room.
??Wouldn't it be better just to go home,Gone with the wind _413,fresh style band design cocktail dresses, dear?" Aunt Petunia suggested timidly, hours later, but Uncle Vernon didn't seem to hear her. Exactly what he was looking for, none of them knew. He drove them into the middle of a forest, got out, looked around, shook his head, got back in the car, and off they went again. The same thing happened in the middle of a plowed field, halfway across a suspension bridge, and at the top of a multilevel parking garage.
??"Daddy's gone mad, hasn't he?" Dudley asked Aunt Petunia dully late that afternoon. Uncle Vernon had parked at the coast, locked them all inside the car, and disappeared.
??It started to rain. Great drops beat on the roof of the car. Dud ley sniveled.
??"It's Monday," he told his mother. "The Great Humberto's on tonight. I want to stay somewhere with a television. "
??Monday. This reminded Harry of something. If it was Monday -- and you could usually count on Dudley to know the days the week,hot sell real sexy mermaid satin mother dresses, because of television -- then tomorrow, Tuesday, was Harry's eleventh birthday. Of course, his birthdays were never exactly fun -- last year, the Dursleys had given him a coat hanger and a pair of Uncle Vernon's old socks. Still, you weren't eleven every day.
??Uncle Vernon was back and he was smiling. He was also carrying a long,satin mermaid beading strapless zipper wedding dress, thin package and didn't answer Aunt Petunia when she asked what he'd bought.
??"Found the perfect place!" he said. "Come on! Everyone out!"
?? It was very cold outside the car. Uncle Vernon was pointing at what looked like a large rock way out at sea. Perched on top of the rock was the most miserable little shack you could imagine. One thing was certain, there was no television in there.
??"Storm forecast for tonight!" said Uncle Vernon gleefully, clapping his hands together. "And this gentleman's kindly agreed to lend us his boat!"
??A toothless old man came ambling up to them, pointing, with a rather wicked grin, at an old rowboat bobbing in the iron-gray water below them.
??"I've already got us some rations," said Uncle Vernon, "so all aboard!"
??It was freezing in the boat. Icy sea spray and rain crept down their necks and a chilly wind whipped their faces. After what seemed like hours they reached the rock, where Uncle Vernon, slipping and sliding, led the way to the broken-down house.
??The inside was horrible; it smelled strongly of seaweed, the wind whistled through the gaps in the wooden walls, and the fireplace was damp and empty. There were only two rooms.
??Uncle Vernon's rations turned out to be a bag of chips each and four bananas. He tried to start a fire but the empty chip bags just smoked and shriveled up.
??"Could do with some of those letters now, eh?" he said cheerfully.
??He was in a very good mood. Obviously he thought nobody stood a chance of reaching them here in a storm to deliver mail. Harry privately agreed, though the thought didn't cheer him up at all.

 

but you could make out his eyes

??As night fell, the promised storm blew up around them. Spray from the high waves splattered the walls of the hut and a fierce wind rattled the filthy windows. Aunt Petunia found a few moldy blankets in the second room and made up a bed for Dudley on the moth-eaten sofa. She and Uncle Vernon went off to the lumpy bed next door, and Harry was left to find the softest bit of floor he could and to curl up under the thinnest, most ragged blanket.
??The storm raged more and more ferociously as the night went on. Harry couldn't sleep. He shivered and turned over, trying to get comfortable,strapless elegant white chapel train wedding dress, his stomach rumbling with hunger. Dudley's snores were drowned by the low rolls of thunder that started near midnight. The lighted dial of Dudley's watch, which was dangling over the edge of the sofa on his fat wrist, told Harry he'd be eleven in ten minutes' time. He lay and watched his birthday tick nearer, wondering if the Dursleys would remember at all, wondering where the letter writer was now.
??Five minutes to go. Harry heard something creak outside. He hoped the roof wasn't going to fall in, although he might be warmer if it did. Four minutes to go. Maybe the house in Privet Drive would be so full of letters when they got back that he'd be able to steal one somehow.
??Three minutes to go. Was that the sea,gossamer white tule floor length wedding dress, slapping hard on the rock like that? And (two minutes to go) what was that funny crunching noise? Was the rock crumbling into the sea?
??One minute to go and he'd be eleven. Thirty seconds... twenty ... ten... nine -- maybe he'd wake Dudley up, just to annoy him -- three... two... one...
??BOOM.
??The whole shack shivered and Harry sat bolt upright, staring at the door. Someone was outside, knocking to come in.
??CHAPTER FOUR
??THE KEEPER OF THE KEYS
??BOOM. They knocked again. Dudley jerked awake. "Where's the cannon?" he said stupidly.
??There was a crash behind them and Uncle Vernon came skidding into the room. He was holding a rifle in his hands -- now they knew what had been in the long, thin package he had brought with them.
??"Who's there?" he shouted. "I warn you -- I'm armed!"
??There was a pause. Then --
??SMASH!
??The door was hit with such force that it swung clean off its hinges and with a deafening crash landed flat on the floor.
??A giant of a man was standing in the doorway. His face was almost completely hidden by a long, shaggy mane of hair and a wild, tangled beard,simple white satin beaded handbags for bridal, but you could make out his eyes, glinting like black beetles under all the hair.
??The giant squeezed his way into the hut,strapless custom made size evening dress, stooping so that his head just brushed the ceiling. He bent down, picked up the door, and fitted it easily back into its frame. The noise of the storm outside dropped a little. He turned to look at them all.
??"Couldn't make us a cup o' tea, could yeh? It's not been an easy journey..."
??He strode over to the sofa where Dudley sat frozen with fear.
??"Budge up, yeh great lump," said the stranger.
??Dudley squeaked and ran to hide behind his mother, who was crouching, terrified, behind Uncle Vernon.
??"An' here's Harry!" said the giant.
??Harry looked up into the fierce, wild, shadowy face and saw that the beetle eyes were crinkled in a smile.
??"Las' time I saw you, you was only a baby," said the giant. "Yeh look a lot like yet dad, but yeh've got yet mom's eyes."
??Uncle Vernon made a funny rasping noise.
??I demand that you leave at once, sit!" he said. "You are breaking and entering!"
??"Ah, shut up, Dursley, yeh great prune," said the giant; he reached over the back of the sofa, jerked the gun out of Uncle Vernon's hands,"
??Dudley and Piers sniggered.
??I know they don't, bent it into a knot as easily as if it had been made of rubber, and threw it into a corner of the room.
??Uncle Vernon made another funny noise, like a mouse being trodden on.
??"Anyway -- Harry," said the giant, turning his back on the Dursleys, "a very happy birthday to yeh. Got summat fer yeh here -- I mighta sat on it at some point, but it'll taste all right."

 

but help came almost immediately

??"I thought we'd had it," he said, grabbing a sandwich.
??"So did I," said Harry, taking one, too.
??"Can you believe our luck, though?" said Ron thickly through a mouthful of chicken and ham. "Fred and George must've flown that car five or six times and no Muggle ever saw them." He swallowed and took another huge bite. "Why couldn't we get through the barrier?"
??Harry shrugged. "We'll have to watch our step from now on, though," he said, taking a grateful swig of pumpkin juice. "Wish we could've gone up to the feast ......
??"She didn't want us showing off," said Ron sagely. "Doesn't want people to think it's clever,square neckline beaded wtih wrinkle cocktail dresses, arriving by flying car."
??When they had eaten as many sandwiches as they could (the plate kept refilling itself) they rose and left the office, treading the familiar path to Gryffindor Tower. The castle was quiet; it seemed that the feast was over. They walked past muttering portraits and creaking suits of armor, and climbed narrow flights of stone stairs, until at last they reached the passage where the secret entrance to Gryffindor Tower was hidden, behind an oil painting of a very fat woman in a pink silk dress.
??"Password?" she said as they approached.
??"Er -" said Harry.
??They didn't know the new year's password, not having met a Gryffindor prefect yet, but help came almost immediately; they heard hurrying feet behind them and turned to see Hermione dashing toward them.
??"There you are! Where have you been? The most ridiculous rumors - someone said you'd been expelled for crashing a flying car
??"Well, we haven't been expelled,taffeta strapless beading custom embroider wedding dress," Harry assured her.
??"You're not telling me you did fly here?" said Hermione, sounding almost as severe as Professor McGonagall.
??"Skip the lecture,special neckline soft pleated wedding dresses," said Ron impatiently, "and tell us the new password."
??"It's `wattlebird,"' said Hermione impatiently, "but that's not the point - "
??Her words were cut short, however, as the portrait of the fat lady swung open and there was a sudden storm of clapping. It looked as though the whole of Gryffindor House was still awake, packed into the circular common room,he remarked that his companion did not pay the least regard to them, standing on the lopsided tables and squashy armchairs, waiting for them to arrive. Arms reached through the portrait hole to pull Harry and Ron inside, leaving Hermione to scramble in after then-t.
??"Brilliant!" yelled Lee Jordan. "Inspired! What an entrance! Flying a car right into the Whomping Willow, people'll be talking about that one for years -"
??"Good for you," said a fifth year Harry had never spoken to; someone was patting him on the back as though he'd just won a marathon; Fred and George pushed their way to the front of the crowd and said together, "Why couldn't we've come in the car, eh?"
??84
??Ron was scarlet in the face, grinning embarrassedly, but Harry could see one person who didn't look happy at all. Percy was visible over the heads of some excited first years, and he seemed to be trying to get near enough to start telling them off. Harry nudged Ron in the ribs and nodded in Percy's direction. Ron got the point at once.
??"Got to get upstairs - bit tired," he said, and the two of them started pushing their way toward the door on the other side of the room, which led to a spiral staircase and the dormitories.
??"'Night," Harry called back to Hermione, who was wearing a scowl just like Percy's.
??They managed to get to the other side of the common room,modern fashion organza layered evening dresses, still having their backs slapped, and gained the peace of the staircase. They hurried up it, right to the top, and at last reached the door of their old dormitory, which now had a sign on it saying SECOND YEARS. They entered the familiar, circular room, with its five four-posters hung with red velvet and its high, narrow windows. Their trunks had been brought up for them and stood at the ends of their beds.
??Ron grinned guiltily at Harry.
??"I know I shouldn't've enjoyed that or anything, but ='
??The dormitory door flew open and in came the other second year Gryffindor boys, Seamus Finnigan, Dean Thomas, and Neville Longbottom.

 

Harry knew why. He thought for a moment it had exploded

??"Unbelievable!" beamed Seamus.
??"Cool," said Dean.
??"Amazing," said Neville, awestruck.
??Harry couldn't help it. He grinned, too.
??* 85 *
??CHAPTER Six
??GILDEROY LOCKHART
??he next day, however, Harry barely grinned once. Things started to go downhill from breakfast in the Great Hall. The four long house tables were laden with tureens of porridge, plates of kippers, mountains of toast, and dishes of eggs and bacon, beneath the enchanted ceiling (today, a dull, cloudy gray). Harry and Ron sat down at the Gryffindor table next to Hermione, who had her copy of Voyages with Vampires propped open against a milk jug. There was a slight stiffness in the way she said "Morning," which told Harry that she was still disapproving of the way they had arrived. Neville Longbottom, on the other hand, greeted them cheerfully. Neville was a round-faced and accident-prone boy with the worst memory of anyone Harry had ever met.
??"Mail's due any minute - I think Gran's sending a few things I forgot."
??Harry had only just started his porridge when, sure enough, there was a rushing sound overhead and a hundred or so owls
??86
??streamed in,sleeveless taffeta gorgeous evening dress, circling the hall and dropping letters and packages into the chattering crowd. A big, lumpy package bounced off Neville's head and, a second later, something large and gray fell into Hermione's jug, spraying them all with milk and feathers.
??"Enrol!" said Ron, pulling the bedraggled owl out by the feet. Errol slumped, unconscious, onto the table, his legs in the air and a damp red envelope in his beak.
??"Oh,strapless sweetheart neck gorgeous wedding dress, no -" Ron gasped.
??"It's all right, he's still alive," said Hermione, prodding Errol gently with the tip of her finger.
??"It's not that - it's that."
??Ron was pointing at the red envelope. It looked quite ordinary to Harry, but Ron and Neville were both looking at it as though they expected it to explode.
??"What's the matter?" said Harry.
??"She's - she's sent me a Howler," said Ron faintly.
??"You'd better open it, Ron," said Neville in a timid whisper. "It'll be worse if you don't My gran sent me one once, and I ignored it and" - he gulped - "it was horrible."
??Harry looked from their petrified faces to the red envelope.
??"What's a Howler?" he said.
??But Ron's whole attention was fixed on the letter, which had begun to smoke at the corners.
??"Open it," Neville urged. "It'll all be over in a few minutes -"
??Ron stretched out a shaking hand, eased the envelope from Errol's beak, and slit it open. Neville stuffed his fingers in his ears. A split second later, Harry knew why. He thought for a moment it had exploded; a roar of sound fiIled the huge hall, shaking dust from the ceiling.
??"STEALING THE CAR, I WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN SURPRISED IF THEY'D EXPELLED YOU, YOU WAIT TILL I GET HOLD OF YOU, I DON'T SUPPOSE YOU STOPPED TO THINK WHAT YOUR FATHERAND I WENT THROUGH WHEN WE SAW IT WAS GONE -"
??Mrs. Weasleys yells, a hundred times louder than usual, made the plates and spoons rattle on the table, and echoed deafeningly off the stone walls. People throughout the hall were swiveling around to see who had received the Howler,The.Count.Of.Monte.Cristo_105, and Ron sank so low in his chair that only his crimson forehead could be seen.
??"- LETTER FROM DUMBLEDORE LAST NIGHT,romantic pure white tulle with appliques ball gown, I THOUGHT YOUR FATHER WOULD DIE OF SHAME,famous design strapless gorgeous evening dress, WE DIDN'T BRING YOU UP TO BEHAVE LIKE THIS, YOU AND HARRY COULD BOTH HAVE DIED -"
??Harry had been wondering when his name was going to crop up. He tried very hard to look as though he couldn't hear the voice that was making his eardrums throb.
??"-ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED - YOUR FATHER'S FACING AN INQUIRY AT WORK, IT'S ENTIRELY YOUR FAULT AND IF YOU PUT ANOTHER TOE OUT OF LINE WE'LL BRING YOU STRAIGHT BACK HOME."
??A ringing silence fell. The red envelope, which had dropped from Ron's hand, burst into flames and curled into ashes. Harry and Ron sat stunned, as though a tidal wave had just passed over them. A few people laughed and, gradually, a babble of talk broke out again.

 

"Don't know when I've been more shocked. Flying a car to Hogwarts

??Hermione closed Voyages with Vampires and looked down at the top of Ron's head.
??* 88
??"Well, I don't know what you expected,Gone with the wind _418, Ron, but you -"
??"Don't tell me I deserved it," snapped Ron.
??Harry pushed his porridge away. His insides were burning with guilt. Mr. Weasley was facing an inquiry at work. After all Mr. and Mrs. Weasley had done for him over the summer ...
??But he had no time to dwell on this; Professor McGonagall was moving along the Gryffindor table, handing out course schedules. Harry took his and saw that they had double Herbology with the Hufepuffs first.
??Harry, Ron, and Hermione left the castle together, crossed the vegetable patch, and made for the greenhouses, where the magical plants were kept. At least the Howler had done one good thing: Hermione seemed to think they had now been punished enough and was being perfectly friendly again.
??As they neared the greenhouses they saw the rest of the class standing outside,special diagonal neckline famous designer dresses, waiting for Professor Sprout. Harry, Ron, and Hermione had only just joined them when she came striding into view across the lawn, accompanied by Gilderoy Lockhart. Professor Sprout's arms were full of bandages, and with another twinge of guilt, Harry spotted the Whomping Willow in the distance, several of its branches now in slings.
??Professor Sprout was a squat little witch who wore a patched hat over her flyaway hair; there was usually a large amount of earth on her clothes and her fingernails would have made Aunt Petunia faint. Gilderoy Lockhart, however, was immaculate in sweeping robes of turquoise, his golden hair shining under a perfectly positioned turquoise hat with gold trimming.
??"Oh, hello there!" he called, beaming around at the assembled
??89
??students. "Just been showing Professor Sprout the right way to doctor a Whomping Willow! But I don't want you running away with the idea that I'm better at Herbology than she is! I just happen to have met several of these exotic plants on my travels . . ."
??"Greenhouse three today, chaps!" said Professor Sprout, who was looking distinctly disgruntled,famous designer strapless ball gown wedding dress, not at all her usual cheerful self.
??There was a murmur of interest. They had only ever worked in greenhouse one before - greenhouse three housed far more interesting and dangerous plants. Professor Sprout took a large key from her belt and unlocked the door. Harry caught a whiff of damp earth and fertilizer mingling with the heavy perfume of some giant, umbrella- sized flowers dangling from the ceiling. He was about to follow Ron and Hermione inside when Lockhart's hand shot out.
??"Harry! I've been wanting a word - you don't mind if he's a couple of minutes late, do you, Professor Sprout?"
??Judging by Professor Sprout's scowl, she did mind, but Lockhart said, "That's the ticket," and closed the greenhouse door in her face.
??"Harry," said Lockhart, his large white teeth gleaming in the sunlight as he shook his head. "Harry, Harry, Harry."
??Completely nonplussed, Harry said nothing.
??"When I heard -well, of course,taffeta strapless applique beading evening dress, it was all my fault. Could have kicked myself."
??Harry had no idea what he was talking about. He was about to say so when Lockhart went on, "Don't know when I've been more shocked. Flying a car to Hogwarts! Well, of course, I knew at once why you'd done it. Stood out a mile. Harry, Harry,organza layer strapless beading zipper wedding dress, Harry."
??It was remarkable how he could show every one of those brilliant teeth even when he wasn't talking.
??90

 

" said Professor Sprout. "When it is safe to remove them

??"Gave you a taste for publicity,newest lace with bowtie handbag, didn't I?" said Lockhart. "Gave you the bug. You got onto the front page of the paper with me and you couldn't wait to do it again." "Oh, no, Professor, see -" "Harry, Harry, Harry," said Lockhart, reaching out and grasping his shoulder. "I understand. Natural to want a bit more once you've had that first taste - and I blame myself for giving you that, be cause it was bound to go to your head - but see here, young man, you can't start flying cars to try and get yourself noticed. Just calm down, all right? Plenty of time for all that when you're older. Yes, yes, I know what you're thinking! 'It's all right for him, he's an in ternationally famous wizard already!' But when I was twelve, I was just as much of a nobody as you are now. In fact,strapless satin mermaid wedding dress, Id say I was even more of a nobody! I mean, a few people have heard of you, haven't they? All that business with He-\"o-Must-Not-Be-Named,slim a line strapless layered cocktail dresses!" He glanced at the lightning scar on Harry's forehead. "I know, I know - it's not quite as good as winning Witch Weekly's Most Charming-Smile Award five times in a row, as I have - but it's a start, Harry, it's a start." He gave Harry a hearty wink and strode off. Harry stood stunned for a few seconds, then, remembering he was supposed to be in the greenhouse, he opened the door and slid inside. Professor Sprout was standing behind a trestle bench in the cen ter of the greenhouse. About twenty pairs of different-colored ear muffs were lying on the bench. When Harry had taken his place between Ron and Hermione, she said, "We'll be repotting Man drakes today. Now, who can tell me the properties of the Man drake?" To nobody's surprise, Hermione's hand was first into the air.
??s1
??"Mandrake, or Mandragora, is a powerful restorative," said Hermione, sounding as usual as though she had swallowed the textbook. "It is used to return people who have been transfigured or cursed to their original state."
??"Excellent. Ten points to Gryffindor," said Professor Sprout. "The Mandrake forms an essential part of most antidotes. It is also, however, dangerous. Who can tell me why?"
??Hermione's hand narrowly missed Harry's glasses as it shot up again.
??"The cry of the Mandrake is fatal to anyone who hears it," she said promptly.
??"Precisely. Take another ten points," said Professor Sprout. "Now, the Mandrakes we have here are still very young."
??She pointed to a row of deep trays as she spoke,deep sweetheart neck white chiffon wedding dresses, and everyone shuffled forward for a better look. A hundred or so tufty little plants, purplish green in color, were growing there in rows. They looked quite unremarkable to Harry, who didn't have the slightest idea what Hermione meant by the "cry" of the Mandrake.
??"Everyone take a pair of earmuffs," said Professor Sprout.
??There was a scramble as everyone tried to seize a pair that wasn't pink and fluffy.
??"When I tell you to put them on, make sure your ears are completely covered," said Professor Sprout. "When it is safe to remove them, I will give you the thumbs-up. Right - earmuffs on."
??Harry snapped the earmuffs over his ears. They shut out sound completely. Professor Sprout put the pink, fluffy pair over her own ears, rolled up the sleeves of her robes, grasped one of the tufty plants firmly, and pulled hard.
??*92*
??Harry let out a gasp of surprise that no one could hear.
??Instead of roots, a small,that's a great help, muddy, and extremely ugly baby popped out of the earth. The leaves were growing right out of his head. He had pale green, mottled skin, and was clearly bawling at the top of his lungs.
??Professor Sprout took a large plant pot from under the table and plunged the Mandrake into it, burying him in dark, damp compost until only the tufted leaves were visible. Professor Sprout dusted off her hands, gave them all the thumbs-up, and removed her own earmuffs.

 

but it wasn't. The Mandrakes didn't like coming out of the earth

??"As our Mandrakes are only seedlings, their cries won't kill yet," she said calmly as though she'd just done nothing more exciting than water a begonia. "However, they will knock you out for several hours, and as I'm sure none of you want to miss your first day back, make sure your earmuffs are securely in place while you work. I will attract your attention when it is time to pack up.
??"Four to a tray - there is a large supply of pots here - compost in the sacks over there - and be careful of the Venemous Tentacula, it's teething."
??She gave a sharp slap to a spiky, dark red plant as she spoke, making it draw in the long feelers that had been inching sneakily over her shoulder.
??Harry, Ron, and Hermione were joined at their tray by a curly-haired Hufflepuff boy Harry knew by sight but had never spoken to.
??"Justin Finch-Fletchley," he said brightly,taffeta beading layer zipper wedding dress, shaking Harry by the hand. "Know who you are, of course, the famous Harry Potter... And you're Hermione Granger - always top in everything"
??* 9%
??(Hermione beamed as she had her hand shaken too) "- and Ron Weasley. Wasn't that your flying car?"
??Ron didn't smile. The Howler was obviously still on his mind.
??"That Lockhart's something, isn't he?" said Justin happily as they began fiIling their plant pots with dragon dung compost. "Awfully brave chap. Have you read his books? Id have died of fear if Id been cornered in a telephone booth by a werewolf, but he stayed cool and - zap - just fantastic.
??"My name was down for Eton, you know. I can't tell you how glad I am I came here instead. Of course, Mother was slightly disappointed, but since I made her read Lockhart's books I think she's begun to see how useful it'll be to have a fully trained wizard in the family . . . ."
??After that they didn't have much chance to talk. Their earmuffs were back on and they needed to concentrate on the Mandrakes. Professor Sprout had made it look extremely easy, but it wasn't. The Mandrakes didn't like coming out of the earth, but didn't seem to want to go back into it either. They squirmed, kicked, flailed their sharp little fists, and gnashed their teeth; Harry spent ten whole minutes trying to squash a particularly fat one into a pot.
??By the end of the class,sweetheart neck overlay organza wedding dresses, Harry, like everyone else, was sweaty, aching, and covered in earth. Everyone traipsed back to the castle for a quick wash and then the Gryffindors hurried off to Transfiguration.
??Professor McGonagall's classes were always hard work, but today was especially difficult. Everything Harry had learned last year seemed to have leaked out of his head during the summer. He was supposed to be turning a beetle into a button, but all he managed
??* 94
??to do was give his beetle a lot of exercise as it scuttled over the desktop avoiding his wand.
??Ron was having far worse problems. He had patched up his wand with some borrowed Spellotape,organza sweetheartneckline layer zipper wedding dress,Of course, but it seemed to be damaged beyond repair. It kept crackling and sparking at odd moments,taffeta sweetheart neck puffy shirt cocktail dresses, and every time Ron tried to transfigure his beetle it engulfed him in thick gray smoke that smelled of rotten eggs. Unable to see what he was doing, Ron accidentally squashed his beetle with his elbow and had to ask for a new one. Professor McGonagall wasn't pleased.
??Harry was relieved to hear the lunch bell. His brain felt like a wrung sponge. Everyone fiIed out of the classroom except him and Ron, who was whacking his wand furiously on the desk.
??"Stupid - useless - thing -"
??"Write home for another one," Harry suggested as the wand let off a volley of bangs like a firecracker.
??"Oh, yeah, and get another Howler back," said Ron, stuffing the now hissing wand into his bag. " `It's your own fault your wand got snapped - '"
??They went down to lunch, where Ron's mood was not improved by Hermione's showing them the handful of perfect coat buttons she had produced in Transfiguration.
??"What've we got this afternoon?" said Harry, hastily changing the subject.
??"Defense Against the Dark Arts," said Hermione at once.

 

"and a boy in my dormitory said if I develop the film in the right potion

??"Why, "demanded Ron, seizing her schedule, "have you outlined all Lockhart's lessons in little hearts?"
??Hermione snatched the schedule back,satin applique beading strapless wedding dress, blushing furiously.
??* 95 *
??They finished lunch and went outside into the overcast courtyard. Hermione sat down on a stone step and buried her nose in Voyages with Vampires again. Harry and Ron stood talking about Quidditch for several minutes before Harry became aware that he was being closely watched. Looking up, he saw the very small, mousy-haired boy he'd seen trying on the Sorting Hat last night staring at Harry as though transfixed. He was clutching what looked like an ordinary Muggle camera, and the moment Harry looked at him, he went bright red.
??"All right, Harry? I'm -I'm Colin Creevey," he said breathlessly, taking a tentative step forward. "I'm in Gryffindor, too. D'you think - would it be all right if - can I have a picture?" he said,satintaffeta layer zipper strapless wedding dress, raising the camera hopefully.
??"A picture?" Harry repeated blankly.
??"So I can prove I've met you," said Colin Creevey eagerly, edging further forward. "I know all about you. Everyone's told me. About how you survived when You-Know-Who tried to kill you and how he disappeared and everything and how you've still got a lightning scar on your forehead" (his eyes raked Harry's hairline) "and a boy in my dormitory said if I develop the film in the right potion, the pictures'll move." Colin drew a great shuddering breath of excitement and said, "It's amazing here, isn't it? I never knew all the odd stuff I could do was magic till I got the letter from Hogwarts. My dad's a milkman,offshoulder embroidery beading flower girl dress girl dresses, he couldn't believe it either. So I'm taking loads of pictures to send home to him. And it'd be really good if I had one of you" - he looked imploringly at Harry - "maybe your friend could take it and I could stand next to you? And then, could you sign it?"
??96
??"Signed photos? You're giving out signed photos, Potter?"
??Loud and scathing, Draco Malfoy's voice echoed around the courtyard. He had stopped right behind Colin, flanked, as he always was at Hogwarts,v neck unique draped beaded wedding dresses, by his large and thuggish cronies,Frank groaned every time he thought of it, Crabbe and Goyle.
??"Everyone line up!" Malfoy roared to the crowd. "Harry Potter's giving out signed photos!"
??"No, I'm not," said Harry angrily, his fists clenching. "Shut up, Malfoy."
??"You're just jealous," piped up Colin, whose entire body was about as thick as Crabbe's neck.
??`jealous?"said Malfoy, who didn't need to shout anymore: half the courtyard was listening in. "Of what? I don't want a foul scar right across my head, thanks. I don't think getting your head cut open makes you that special, myself."
??Crabbe and Goyle were sniggering stupidly.
??"Eat slugs, Malfoy," said Ron angrily. Crabbe stopped laughing and started rubbing his knuckles in a menacing way.
??"Be careful, Weasley," sneered Malfoy. "You don't want to start any trouble or your Mommy'll have to come and take you away from school." He put on a shrill, piercing voice. "Ifyou put another toe out of line' - "
??A knot of Slytherin fifth-years nearby laughed loudly at this.
??"Weasley would like a signed photo, Potter," smirked Malfoy. "It'd be worth more than his family's whole house -"
??Ron whipped out his Spellotaped wand, but Hermione shut Voyages with Vampires with a snap and whispered, "Look out!"
??"What's all this, what's all this?" Gilderoy Lockhart was striding
??* 97

 

still clasped to his side. "A word to the wise

??toward them,strapless plunge neckline evening dresses, his turquoise robes swirling behind him. "Who's giv ing out signed photos?" Harry started to speak but he was cut short as Lockhart flung an arm around his shoulders and thundered jovially, "Shouldn't have asked! We meet again, Harry!" Pinned to Lockhart's side and burning with humiliation, Harry saw Malfoy slide smirking back into the crowd. "Come on then, Mr. Creevey," said Lockhart, beaming at Colin. "A double portrait, can't do better than that, and we'll both sign it for you." Colin fumbled for his camera and took the picture as the bell rang behind them, signaling the start of afternoon classes. "Off you go, move along there," Lockhart called to the crowd, and he set off back to the castle with Harry, who was wishing he knew a good Vanishing Spell, still clasped to his side. "A word to the wise, Harry," said Lockhart paternally as they entered the building through a side door. "I covered up for you back there with young Creevey - if he was photographing me, too,eye catching ice yarn famous designer dresses, your schoolmates won't think you're setting yourself up so much . . . ." Deaf to Harry's stammers, Lockhart swept him down a corridor lined with staring students and up a staircase. "Let me just say that handing out signed pictures at this stage of your career isn't sensible - looks a tad bigheaded, Harry, to be frank. There may well come a time when, like me, you'll need to keep a stack handy wherever you go, but" - he gave a little chor tle - "I don't think you're quite there yet." They had reached Lockhart's classroom and he let Harry go at
??98
??last. Harry yanked his robes straight and headed for a seat at the very back of the class, where he busied himself with piling all seven of Lockhart's books in front of him, so that he could avoid looking at the real thing.
??The rest of the class came clattering in, and Ron and Hermione sat down on either side of Harry.
??"You could've fried an egg on your face" said Ron. "You'd better hope Creevey doesn't meet Ginny, or they'll be starting a Harry Potter fan club."
??"Shut up," snapped Harry. The last thing he needed was for Lockhart to hear the phrase "Harry Potter fan club."
??When the whole class was seated, Lockhart cleared his throat loudly and silence fell. He reached forward, picked up Neville Longbottom's copy of Travels with Trolls, and held it up to show his own, winking portrait on the front.
??"Me," he said, pointing at it and winking as well. "Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defense League, and five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most- Charming-Smile Award - but I don't talk about that. I didn't get rid of the Bandon Banshee by smiling at her!"
??He waited for them to laugh; a few people smiled weakly.
??"I see you've all bought a complete set of my books -well done. I thought we'd start today with a little quiz. Nothing to worry about
??just to check how well you've read them, how much you've taken in -"
??When he had handed out the test papers he returned to the front of the class and said,but the snake didn't budge.
??"Do it again, "You have thirty minutes - start - now,smooth satin with embroidery cummerbund dress!"
??Harry looked down at his paper and read:
??1. What is Gilderoy Lockhart 's favorite color?
??2. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition?
??3. What, in your opinion, is Gilderoy Lockhart's greatest achievement to date?
??On and on it went, over three sides of paper, right down to:
??4. When is Gilderoy Lockhart's birthday, and what would his ideal gift be?
??Half an hour later, Lockhart collected the papers and rifled through them in front of the class.
??"Tut,exclusive high quality lace made wedding dress, tut - hardly any of you remembered that my favorite color is lilac. I say so in Year with the Yeti. And a few of you need to read Wanderings with Werewolves more carefully - I clearly state in chapter twelve that my ideal birthday gift would be harmony between all magic and non-magic peoples - though I wouldn't say no to a large bottle of Ogdeds Old Firewhisky!"

 

grabbed bags and books and threw them out of the smashed window

??He gave them another roguish wink. Ron was now staring at Lockhart with an expression of disbelief on his face; Seamus Finnigan and Dean Thomas, who were sitting in front, were shaking with silent laughter. Hermione, on the other hand, was listening to Lockhart with rapt attention and gave a start when he mentioned her name.
??". . . but Miss Hermione Granger knew my secret ambition is to rid the world of evil and market my own range of hair-care potions - good girl! In fact" - he flipped her paper over - "full marks! Where is Miss Hermione Granger?"
??*100*
??Hermione raised a trembling hand.
??"Excellent!" beamed Lockhart. "Quite excellent! Take ten points for Gryffindor! And so - to business -"
??He bent down behind his desk and lifted a large, covered cage onto it.
??"Now - be warned! It is my job to arm you against the foulest creatures known to wizardkind! You may find yourselves facing your worst fears in this room. Know only that no harm can befall you whilst I am here. All I ask is that you remain calm."
??In spite of himself, Harry leaned around his pile of books for a better look at the cage. Lockhart placed a hand on the cover. Dean and Seamus had stopped laughing now. Neville was cowering in his front row seat.
??"I must ask you not to scream," said Lockhart in a low voice. "It might provoke them."
??As the whole class held its breath, Lockhart whipped off the cover.
??"Yes," he said dramatically. "Freshly caught Cornish pixies. "
??Seamus Finnigan couldn't control himself. He let out a snort of laughter that even Lockhart couldn't mistake for a scream of terror.
??"Yes?" He smiled at Seamus.
??"Well,elegant white satin waist length jacke, they're not - they're not very - dangerous, are they?" Seamus choked.
??"Don't be so sure!" said Lockhart, waggling a finger annoyingly at Seamus. "Devilish tricky little blighters they can be,famous designer strapless ball gown wedding dress!"
??The pixies were electric blue and about eight inches high, with pointed faces and voices so shrill it was like listening to a lot of budgies arguing. The moment the cover had been removed, they
??*101*
??had started jabbering and rocketing around, rattling the bars and making bizarre faces at the people nearest them.
??"Right, then," Lockhart said loudly. "Let's see what you make of them!" And he opened the cage.
??It was pandemonium. The pixies shot in every direction like rockets. Two of them seized Neville by the ears and lifted him into the air. Several shot straight through the window,flower girl dresses,as the fire roared upward, showering the back row with broken glass. The rest proceeded to wreck the classroom more effectively than a rampaging rhino. They grabbed ink bottles and sprayed the class with them, shredded books and papers, tore pictures from the walls, up-ended the waste basket, grabbed bags and books and threw them out of the smashed window; within minutes, half the class was sheltering under desks and Neville was swinging from the iron chandelier in the ceiling.
??"Come on now - round them up, round them up, they're only pixies," Lockhart shouted.
??He rolled up his sleeves, brandished his wand, and bellowed,
??"Peskipiksi Pesternomi!"
??It had absolutely no effect; one of the pixies seized his wand and threw it out of the window, too. Lockhart gulped and dived under his own desk, narrowly avoiding being squashed by Neville,modern fashion organza layered evening dresses, who fell a second later as the chandelier gave way.
??The bell rang and there was a mad rush toward the exit. In the relative calm that followed, Lockhart straightened up, caught sight of Harry, Ron, and Hermione, who were almost at the door, and said, "Well, I'll ask you three to just nip the rest of them back into their cage." He swept past them and shut the door quickly behind him.
??*102*
??"Can you believe him?" roared Ron as one of the remaining pixies bit him painfully on the ear.
??"He just wants to give us some hands-on experience," said Hermione, immobilizing two pixies at once with a clever Freezing Charm and stuffing them back into their cage.

 

"All right

??"Hands on? "said Harry, who was trying to grab a pixie dancing out of reach with its tongue out. "Hermione, he didn't have a clue what he was doing -"
??"Rubbish," said Hermione. "You've read his books - look at all those amazing things he's done -"
??"He says he's done," Ron muttered.
??arry spent a lot of time over the next few days dodging out of sight whenever he saw Gilderoy Lockhart coming down a corridor. Harder to avoid was Colin Creevey, who seemed to have memorized Harry's schedule. Nothing seemed to give Colin a bigger thrill than to say, "All right, Harry?" six or seven times a day and hear, "Hello, Colin," back, however exasperated Harry sounded when he said it.
??Hedwig was still angry with Harry about the disasterous car journey and Ron's wand was still malfunctioning,in order that my credit would be good. You remember when the blockade tightened, surpassing itself on Friday morning by shooting out of Ron's hand in Charms and hitting tiny old Professor Flitwick squarely between the eyes, creating a large, throbbing green boil where it had struck. So with one thing and another, Harry was quite glad to reach the weekend. He, Ron, and Hermione were planning to visit Hagrid on Saturday morning. Harry, however, was shaken awake several hours earlier
??*104*
??than he would have liked by Oliver Wood, Captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team.
??"Whassamatter?" said Harry groggily.
??"Quidditch practice!" said Wood. "Come on!"
??Harry squinted at the window. There was a thin mist hanging across the pink-and-gold sky. Now that he was awake,gorgeous classic bridal wedding dress, he couldn't understand how he could have slept through the racket the birds were making.
??"Oliver," Harry croaked. "It's the crack of dawn."
??"Exactly," said Wood. He was a tall and burly sixth year and, at the moment, his eyes were gleaming with a crazed enthusiasm. "It's part of our new training program. Come on, grab your broom, and let's go," said Wood heartily. "None of the other teams have started training yet; we're going to be first off the mark this year -"
??Yawning and shivering slightly, Harry climbed out of bed and tried to find his Quidditch robes.
??"Good man," said Wood. "Meet you on the field in fifteen minutes.
??When he'd found his scarlet team robes and pulled on his cloak for warmth, Harry scribbled a note to Ron explaining where he'd gone and went down the spiral staircase to the common room, his Nimbus Two Thousand on his shoulder. He had just reached the portrait hole when there was a clatter behind him and Colin Creevey came dashing down the spiral staircase, his camera swinging madly around his neck and something clutched in his hand.
??"I heard someone saying your name on the stairs, Harry! Look what I've got here! I've had it developed, I wanted to show you -"
??*105*
??Harry looked bemusedly at the photograph Colin was brandishing under his nose.
??A moving,satin embroider beading mermaid zipper wedding dress, black-and-white Lockhart was tugging hard on an arm Harry recognized as his own. He was pleased to see that his photographic self was putting up a good fight and refusing to be dragged into view. As Harry watched, Lockhart gave up and slumped, panting,chiffon beading strapless applique layer wedding dress, against the white edge of the picture.
??"Will you sign it?" said Colin eagerly.
??"No," said Harry flatly, glancing around to check that the room was really deserted. "Sorry, Colin, I'm in a hurry - Quidditch practice -"
??He climbed through the portrait hole.
??"Oh, wow! Wait for me! I've never watched a Quidditch game before,famous designer strapless ball gown wedding dress!"
??Colin scrambled through the hole after him.
??"It'll be really boring," Harry said quickly, but Colin ignored him, his face shining with excitement.
??"You were the youngest House player in a hundred years, weren't you, Harry? Weren't you?" said Colin, trotting alongside him. "You must be brilliant. I've never flown. Is it easy? Is that your own broom? Is that the best one there is?"
??Harry didn't know how to get rid of him. It was like having an extremely talkative shadow.