Tik tok thread

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by dtx, Aug 5, 2021.

  1. Nandor the Relentless

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    “That’s a shocker!”
    :ded:
     
  2. Emma

    Emma Words
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  3. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby Daddy’s #1 Candy Baby
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    There’s a 90% chance this is part of Hans Zimmer’s Oppenheimer score
     
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  4. Pile Driving Miss Daisy

    Pile Driving Miss Daisy It angries up the blood
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    Okay I'm a little closer to downloading this app. I love chaotic shit like this,

     
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  5. racer

    racer Yuma, where I work in software.
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    Wait, you said not expensive? Doesn't that pretty much cover everything in Gaston or Swansea?


    Seriously, first dates are to impress so take her to Ruth's Chris on Senate St near the Capital in Cola.


    Call ahead to make reservations, explain it's a special occasion for two and you'd like a good waiter as well as a quiet table. (Dont say what the occasion is they'll just assume it's big)


    Pick her up in time to relax and enjoy the short ride into Cola preferably after dark so as you come over the hill on 321 past the Food Lion (or whatever it is now) you can comment on how beautiful the skyline lights of downtown Cola appear but they truly can't hold a candle to just how beautiful she looks tonight!


    Once at RC's prove just how special you think she is by pulling up to the entrance and using the valet parking. They'll ask your party name and from there the staff takes over.


    Trust me on this, eat before you pick her up as you want to join her in eating at the restaurant but not a big meal; (pull up their drink menu before you go and pick a simple wine or mixed drink you feel she'll like (ask her friends). As soon as the waiter appears order both your drinks as if you do this often as well as the appetizer - BBQ Shrimp. It's tasty simple and reasonably price. Girls enjoy shrimp. Plus it begins to fill her stomach as she'll need to because she will end up ordering a salad for dinner. If you order something she likes she'll be that more impressed by your efforts).


    When the menus come allow her to place her order first by insisting she feel free to order whatever she desires and encourage her to take her time, no rushing you said she's pretty so enjoy the scenery. They never order steak so it wont be expensive. Bet she orders the Wedge Salad.**never appear to be looking at any prices! Big turnoff*** You then follow up by ordering a small steak or something similar because you'll have already viewed the menu b4 hand. The Pork Chop runs about $28 and is easy to cut as well as eat slowly in smaller chunks. Women like men who are decisive and know what they want! You're not hungry so your meal will not be expensive nor large so you have time to actually talk to her instead of chewing chucks of meat! You know Toby Keith wrote that song "I wanted talk about me" for a reason. Southern Ladies will never admit it but they do want to talk about themselves and they want you to be overwhelmingly interested in them, so talk to her about her! Don't brag about yourself cause you can get into your own pants anytime you like, her's is a different story especially if she has some class about herself.


    How you end the dinner and before you have the car brought around will determine where your future lays with this young lady. After the table is clear, order coffee even if you hate the stuff, ladies love coffee and ordering it as if you just always do so after meals will tell her you're totally different than any other guy she's dated. If you cant drink the stuff just sip it. She'll drink it! Don't ask if she would like some just order it!!!!


    About half way thru the cup of coffee sit up all excited and ask her if she's ever had Creme Brulee and insist she try it......most young ladies havent and it'll be a treat for her and show her you're adventurous.


    Now if the evening has progress like you hoped in other words she is enjoying your company and you hers, then order one Brulee with two spoons! Again, encourage her to try it first, wait for her reaction then laughing dip your spoon in. Her reaction afterwards will tell you all you need to know about how she is now feeling about you. If shes offended you put your spoon in her Brulee, then you're in trouble and this date just got panic 911!


    Again, if she's into you you'll know it by now, so remember to stay relaxed and not in a rush. Let her enjoy being the Princess as long as possible.


    When all is ready request the check. A good waiter never brings it, they wait until you request it. And please make sure the damn card works before you get to the restaurant! Never pay with cash - that yells, broke & I still live with my Mom! Even if you do you don't want to admit it.


    Finally, assuming all has gone well, just before handing your car ticket to the valet, ask her if she's ever seen the State House at night. Don't wait for an answer just take her hand and walk her over. Taking your time walk her around the entire building pointing out where Sherman's troups hit the building with their cannons. Front right corner where the stars mark the spots. This tells her you're smart and interesting. Then find a lighted area to sit and talk. Sit next to her and if it's chilly take your coat off (you are wearing a sports coat right? Blazer w/pressed jeans and nice white cotton button down colar shirt, no golf shirts or tee shirts with COCKS blasting out) and place it over her shoulders without asking. What you're hoping/looking for is her sneaking a smell and smiling, if she does you're in the red zone! What you do from here is your business but she'll never forget you and even if it doesn't work out between you two, 2 things will happen in the future. 1) she'll never forget you and will compare every other guy to you. 2) she'll tell all of her girl friends how nice and wonderful your date was and every single one of them will be wanting to date YOU!


    All this impressing will cost you around $150-200! Oh and dont forget to drive the Focus, Pinto, Clunker, SUV or even Red neck deer hunting truck through a car wash and yes pay the extra $5 for the interior cleaning with the Baby Fresh smelling stuff! She might live in Redneckville, I have family there as well, but for once she'd love not to be treated like she's Gretchen Wilson's baby sister and instead appreciated for just being an intelligent, beautiful young lady. Treat her right, get to know her then take her out on that four wheeler and your muddy girl dreams will come true!


    Don't screw this up!
     
  6. TrustyPatches

    TrustyPatches I apologize if this message gets you down
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  7. audrew

    audrew Maste’sr of Education
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  8. SugarShaun

    SugarShaun A man of many hobbies
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    You know this is a sketch right?
     
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  9. SugarShaun

    SugarShaun A man of many hobbies
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  10. TrustyPatches

    TrustyPatches I apologize if this message gets you down
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  11. Nandor the Relentless

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  12. TrustyPatches

    TrustyPatches I apologize if this message gets you down
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  13. racer

    racer Yuma, where I work in software.
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  14. Roy

    Roy Well-Known Member
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    Question for the thread: do you think Australian’s have funny accents or do you think they have the most hilarious accents of all times?
     
  15. racer

    racer Yuma, where I work in software.
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    I think it’s the best accent for a lady to have.
     
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  16. Dump

    Dump The Forever Chaos Agent of TMB
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  17. audrew

    audrew Maste’sr of Education
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    New Zealand’s is better
     
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  18. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby Daddy’s #1 Candy Baby
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  19. audrew

    audrew Maste’sr of Education
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  20. Roy

    Roy Well-Known Member
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    South Carolina Gamecocks

  21. Beeds07

    Beeds07 Bitch, it's Saturday
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  22. racer

    racer Yuma, where I work in software.
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    A lot of people have beef with this tizzy guy. Apparently he got called a pedophile (supposedly falsely) and said some fucked up shit in return to a 10-year old.
     
  23. racer

    racer Yuma, where I work in software.
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  24. Roy

    Roy Well-Known Member
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  25. Jigga

    Jigga Ty Webb is a mean person
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  26. Jigga

    Jigga Ty Webb is a mean person
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    I know it’s a tweet but it’s a tik tok video
     
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  27. racer

    racer Yuma, where I work in software.
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    All his videos are great. I can’t tell he is knows the cooking videos are jokes or not.
     
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  28. racer

    racer Yuma, where I work in software.
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  29. a.tramp

    a.tramp Insubordinate and churlish
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    I don’t know if I am more creeped out by him or by the people that post his videos itt
     
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  30. audrew

    audrew Maste’sr of Education
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  31. racer

    racer Yuma, where I work in software.
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    I thought you were cool
     
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  32. racer

    racer Yuma, where I work in software.
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    I just had this sequence and had a minor anxiety attack for a second when I thought this guy was rubbing Taco Bell nacho cheese on his face. The nail polish.

    [​IMG]
     
  33. Chumbolone

    Chumbolone Wigglin’ my toes on a mink rug…
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  34. Chumbolone

    Chumbolone Wigglin’ my toes on a mink rug…
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  35. a.tramp

    a.tramp Insubordinate and churlish
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  36. dblplay1212

    dblplay1212 Well-Known Member
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    I can watch those videos for hours. I often turn them on and let them run on YT all day.

     
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  37. Chumbolone

    Chumbolone Wigglin’ my toes on a mink rug…
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    What do restorations like this cost, ballpark?
     
  38. a.tramp

    a.tramp Insubordinate and churlish
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  39. TrustyPatches

    TrustyPatches I apologize if this message gets you down
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  40. Roy

    Roy Well-Known Member
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  41. bro

    bro Hey Hermano
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  42. SugarShaun

    SugarShaun A man of many hobbies
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  43. Stringer Bell

    Stringer Bell Butthole magician

    I probably block about 20 Trumper live feeds per day but TikTok just keeps popping it up on my feeds regardless, some of which i've already blocked before.
     
  44. Stringer Bell

    Stringer Bell Butthole magician

    He's great
     
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  45. Roy

    Roy Well-Known Member
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    Maybe too real to be funny idk

     
    #447 Roy, Feb 18, 2022
    Last edited: Feb 18, 2022
  46. Roy

    Roy Well-Known Member
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  47. fucktx

    fucktx ruthkanda forever
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  48. Truman

    Truman Well-Known Member
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    Hillsboro is indeed a horrible place.
     
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