I mean he says repeatedly he has worked w 8 cases who reversed their situation I am not saying I believe. I've just stopped reading about it and just want my mom to go. She'd be so pissed
Completely agree. Also, I don’t think it’s well understood why it even works the little that it does. Clearing amyloid plaques is definitely not the entire story.
Wow, I did not know this thread existed on here. My father has dementia and is slowly losing memories of vacations, things he’s done recently, purchases, and some of my friends names. He also unfortunately is a stress eater that is forgetting what meals he’s had and he’s gaining tons of weight. It fucking sucks to see him deteriorating on multiple levels. My mom was a nurse for 43 years and took care of my grandpa (dad’s dad) who also went through some of this in his later years. Now with this coming on for my father, I feel terrible that my mom could not even have an enjoyable retirement and is dealing with her husband’s medical issues after dealing with others over her career. She’s the worlds nicest human and it’s like she can’t catch a break from this. My brothers live in SF and NYC, I’m the only one that lives near home and only one she confides my dad’s daily situations to. She doesn’t want to go deep into my dad’s issues with my brothers in order to prevent stressing them out due to their physical distance from home since they can’t help out. She constantly apologizes to me for confiding in me, but I could never even begin to tell my mother “no” because she’ll be alone with her own issues of dealing with this without an outlet. It’s repetitive and it sucks. We want to do one big family vacation but we’re worried he’ll wake up, not know where he’s at and freak out. It’s all super unfortunate and stressful to deal with. I’m sorry that there are others dealing with this, too, but happy that I can “let this out” to others that will understand.
I have dealt with a lot of this in the last 6-7 years. Just be there for your mom. It’s amazing how much a sympathetic ear helps. If you ever need to talk HMU.
Oh absolutely man. My mom is one of my favorite people, I speak to her on the phone 2-3 times a day so she always has an outlet. I appreciate you, brother!
I think my dad's reached the point of needing some kind of professional or facility care. What can we be expecting from a cost standpoint? I'm currently visiting/watching him while my mom recovers from surgery. He knows he has a son but he hasn't figured out his son and me are the same person. I've made a game out of it to where I'm like "so me and your son have the same name, job, parents, etc." So he's figured out that I am a son of his but not his son because he only had 1 and he doesn't think we're the same person. He's even asking my grandma who is next to me about who I am, my parents are, etc. because he doesn't believe me. Shit's wild man.
Went down to visit dad again while mom recovers from surgery. How dead inside am I that him not knowing who I am doesn't bother me in the slightest? It's weird, but I've always associated the person that was my dad died around 10 years ago after taking a nasty (drunk af) fall down the stairs that just destroyed his shoulder. He's been physically limited since then and both the physical and mental acuity have been in decline ever since. I guess my pathological level of compartmentalization sees the pre and post fall dad as two different people. Everything I associated with my dad's identity died after that fall, so I see this person that doesn't recognize me as someone else. Idk.
It's certainly understandable. Your process is just that... yours. There is no correct way to emotionally navigate these rough waters. Just do what you think is right actionably and try not to worry about how you should be feeling. Hang in there.
Dawned on me today that it's been a real long time since my mom said either of my kids' names. She has a vague notion that there are "grandkids" but it just sorta slipped past me when the time came that she didn't know who they were anymore.
And on that note, we're thinking it's time for memory care. The thought of moving her out is really hard, but the toll of her care is 100% killing my dad. Part of what's tough for me is I professionally, confidentally advise people all the time as to when it's time for advanced levels of care for people with dementing illnesses. Half of my practice is geriatrics. But when it's my own mom, it's like I know absolutely nothing. I feel so guilty because I think memory care was the right answer months ago, and my dad is just a wreck now. I really appreciate this thread y'all
As long as you're doing your best to help, never feel guilty y'all. It's a struggle and we're all struggling but everyone dealing with this are real ones. Keep doing what you're doing.
Years ago, my favorite band Shovels & Rope (married couple Michael Trent and Cary Ann Hearst) released 2 songs, Mourning Song and Invisible Man, concerning the Alzheimer’s battle Michael’s father was facing at the time. The duo had recently then gotten pregnant for the first time while at the same time welcoming Michael’s parents to live with them to help care for his father. Both songs are written from the perspective of his father, Invisible Man being about the struggles he faced in his current state of mind and Mourning Song being about dealing with his inevitable passing and how he hopes his family will remember him. I’ve always enjoyed these songs and I hope those of you who are currently suffering or have suffered through similar family circumstances do as well. Here are the songs with the lyrics.
My dad died in April 2022. I am very fulfilled with how I handled the last month of his life…with one exception. I never really took into consideration how terrifying the last year must have been for him. I should have talked more to him about that. It’s my only regret.
My mom passed peacefully today. Her BP had gotten real low and he was showing a lot of fluid. I’m just happy some of her suffering is over.
Really sorry to hear that, your journey was similar to what we had to go through from 2020 to 2022 with my wife's mother. It was so tough to see, but thankfully you were at least there to support and help her through it.
So sorry man. Lost my mom to it. Such a long, hard road. I know she appreciated all you did to help and comfort her.
As many of you know, getting woken up by a call or text when you’re in our position is never a good thing—and this was the one I got at 5:25am today. He apparently fell out of bed and couldn’t get back up. These days, his physical condition is nearly as bad as his mental condition, so thankfully he didn’t hurt himself. But trying to lift a limp 300+ pound man who has bad knees and feet was some kind of start to my day. No matter how many times I see it, I’ll never get used to the glassy eyed stare he has when he’s out of it.
I feel that brother. Thankfully, my mom is down to 110lbs soaking wet so it's rather easy for a Husk to heave ho when needed
Moved mom to memory care last week. It was time. It's been a really tough transition, but the right decision. 66 years old. Not fair. Now today my wife of 13 years informed me that she wants a divorce. She's queer, we were making it work as a mixed orientation couple, but she decided she needs to leave to explore a non-hetero relationship. So that's me, that's my life, internet strangers. What a fucking day.
I literally cannot even imagine the weight of all of this on you. Do y’all have kids together? I sincerely hope you can find some light in all of this darkness.
4.5 year old girl and a 2 year old boy. Our daughter is already all kinds of confused and sad about grandma moving to memory care. She was living with us previously, they're really close. I'm so sad for how disappointing her little life is. And a little angry. Srs? Fucking now? Idk I kinda feel like that 3 stooges syndrome bit from The Simpsons like if I had one fewer bummer goin on I couldn't take it, but there's just entirely too much to process thankfully.
My Grandfather is in end stage dementia. Forget sports brother. I feel for you. Stay strong. Love the fuck out of those kids.
My dad died in April 2022. My mom is having his memorial this weekend. I’m pretty annoyed at 1) having to travel/waste a weekend on this and 2) reopening an event that was closed and I was satisfied with.
I don’t think this is the case for jbr but there’s a headstone unveiling ceremony a year after death in Judaism.
Gentile here I don’t even know if my dad has a headstone/plot. He was cremated and I have some ashes. No idea if my mom put a stone in the ground for him.
Mom called today bc my dad was convinced he was at an airport in Palm Beach when he was really at their house in Sarasota. He didn't believe me or her. They live on a golf course and somehow my dad managed to flag down someone passing by to ask where he was. He didn't agree with their answer and said he was going to call the port authority to verify. I find it interesting that anytime he has one of these episodes, he reverts to a time in his life that happened when he was in his 20s.
My grandmother started basically losing her mind towards the end of her life. It was always strange where her mind would revert back to. Like she knew my parents were married but apparently didn't know if they had any kids. Like her mind reverted back to 1978