ITT Interesting Posts from the Bunker (Part 2)

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by Z, Aug 4, 2015.

  1. Phil Connors

    Donor TMB OG
    Alabama Crimson Tide

    :laugh:
     
  2. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby Daddy’s #1 Candy Baby
    Donor

    I really appreciate Mr Sims' belief that Jeremy Johnson would be playing like he did against Arkansas if it weren't for him reading his own press.
     
  3. Dennis Reynolds

    Dennis Reynolds Well-Known Member
    Donor
    Auburn TigersMontreal Impact


    This is the mickey mouse bullshit that makes me rage. I personally do not want him to ever see the field again and would be thrilled for Auburn to have a new QB on Saturday. I absolutely think writing a nonsensical essay invoking the creed is idiotic and unnecessary. I would hate to know that Mr. Johnson spent time reading that letter considering that he currently cannot read a defense. I hope I regret making this post and he never loses a game, but his Heisman worthy comeback win versus mighty Jacksonville State makes me think that he will continue to be terrible.
     
    John McGuirk likes this.
  4. Beachy Toast

    Beachy Toast He wants you too, Malachi.
    Donor
    Chicago White SoxChicago BearsChicago BlackhawksKansas State WildcatsMontreal Impact

    Is this the official Auburn is weird thread?
     
  5. Kirk Fogg

    Kirk Fogg "Tell them what they've won Olmec!"
    Donor TMB OG

    I'm just imagining Andrew Sims's wife telling him to come to dinner, him telling her he's writing an open letter of encouragement to Jeremy Johnson, and her telling him to take his time because that's what a true Auburn man should be doing in a trying time such as this.
     
  6. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby Daddy’s #1 Candy Baby
    Donor

    And later they have missionary style sex but only because they're trying, otherwise it would be sinful.
     
  7. Kirk Fogg

    Kirk Fogg "Tell them what they've won Olmec!"
    Donor TMB OG

    But only after some serious discussions with their pastor to determine if they were ready. Determining that you are ready to share your love for Jesus Christ and Auburn University is not a decision you make lightly.
     
    friedskillet, Merica, Tiffin and 7 others like this.
  8. Jigga

    Jigga Ty Webb is a mean person
    Staff Donor TMB OG
    Miami DolphinsChelseaMiami Heat

    That's a serious auBURN
     
    Hide&SeekChamp and gus_chiggins like this.
  9. Stone Cold Steve Austin

    Stone Cold Steve Austin Tickler Extraordinaire
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideAtlanta Braves

    No
     
    Toast likes this.
  10. jokewood

    jokewood Biff Poggi superfan
    Donor

    Shit. I forgot to uncurse my garish Jostens ring.
     
    Hide&SeekChamp and Tiffin like this.
  11. Menelaus

    Menelaus The Red-Haired King
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideReal Madrid

    It really never gets old. The Auburn cult is a radical, passionate, and to be honest downright impressive feat of social engineering I don't think any of us really fully grasp. Well, maybe Where Eagles Dare
     
  12. NilesIrish

    NilesIrish Not a master fisher but I know bait when I see it
    Donor TMB OG
    Notre Dame Fighting IrishChicago CubsChicago BullsChicago BearsChicago BlackhawksDemocrat

    You calling him "Mr. Johnson" is a little weird it self....I think it's to add to your post style but if not...
     
  13. Phil Connors

    Donor TMB OG
    Alabama Crimson Tide

    Anything good on the Bunker today?
     
  14. (Z)

    (Z) Well-Known Member
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideBoston Red Sox

    Trappist had this in the Iron Bowl thread, but has this gem from the Bunker ever been posted in one of the Bunker threads? Mind you, this was after a game in which Auburn lost back in 2009 and could be one of the all time great displays of LBS.

    It was a low key day. Alabama was supposed to dismantle Auburn. Their Heisman candidate had a national stage to take center spotlight. But something unexpected happened. Our tailgate was a fun morning. We hosted many Bama friends who came by. The food was fabulour, the music was toe tapping, and the weather was perfect. We went to our traditional “Tiger Walk” and cheered the team and coaches into the stadium – like gladiators inot their arena knowing a hungry, undefeated opponent was on the other side pacing and suiting up for a David and Goliath moment. But something unexpected happened. The sea of orange filled the sun-kissed stadium. Every seat was filled. Our Eagle, Tiger, flew around the tops of our heads and landed midfield. The teams entered to thunderous applause, fanfare and frenzied fans. Bama fans wore stickers that said “Fear the shutout.” But something unexpected happened. Auburn, fueled by the fans and faith of spirit with hard work, threw everything they had at Alabama. And for 56 minutes Auburn prevailed. The score, the stats, the noise, the pride; for 56 minutes we owned it. But something unexpected happened.n Alabama put together a successful last minute drive and scored the go ahead points. The TV announcers loved the battle for ratings. No one in the stadium moved. But something unexpected happened. The Alabama fans stayed and “sabaned” their victory. Their band played. Their victory ended a perfect scheduled season. But something unexpected happened. What possibly could be wrong? The Bama fans had suffered, sweated, cursed, paced and prayed for 56 torturous minutes and their team finally pulled it out and won. But what they saw next was not suppose to happen … either. The Auburn Family stayed. They were supposed to flee in defeat but alas the opposite happened. We stayed in our seats and waited for our team to walk off the field. 80,000 family members escorted them off with thunderous applause and chants of “It’s great to be an Auburn Tiger!” The recruits stayed and watched this family of ours lift up our team who served up a whole humble pie to #2 Bama. It reminded me of the scene in “How the Grinch Stole Christmas” when the Who’s in Whoville gathered after their presents and decorations were missing but lifted their voices loudly anyway to lift up their gratitude and celebrations. For us it was about thankfulness, honor and family. For 56 minute we were fans, but as our team walked off the field for a few minutes we were all one family. It was a great feeling and we had not even won the game … on the scoreboard. We walked out of the stadium chanting AU cheers down the ramps. Alabama fans quiet and shocked. Their Heisman candidate was disposed of. Their defense was embarrassed. Their haughtiness was silent. I have not mentioned the crudeness and ugliness that I witnessed or was a part of from Alabama fans prior and during the game. Their reputation for being rude fans lived on – not pulling for their team and being good fans but being jerks to others – even to children. However, after the game they were silent. Eerily quiet. One would have thought they lost the game. The lack of cries of “Roll Tide” was noticeably absent. But something happened. Auburn continued to make us proud, played their hearts out, made idiots of the sports announcers who proclaimed earlier this was a waste to play, and silenced the visiting fans. Yes, something happened. Auburn won everything but the scoreboard. This was not supposed to happen! Alabama was not supposed to allow this!! It was just Auburn for goodness sakes, right? Wrong. Not a perfect day but an AUsome day. And with already picking up some of the top recruits in the nation, a new coaching staff that have eyes of the tiger, and an AU Family ready to support them all, we only have one question – when does the 2010 season start? I CAN’T WAIT!!!
     
    The Milkman, Swt, Barves2125 and 17 others like this.
  15. (Z)

    (Z) Well-Known Member
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideBoston Red Sox

    And if you want to hear some of the greatest whining/conspiracy theory from an official radio broadcast, here you go.



    Complete with inaccuracies, total hysteria, and acting like Will Muschamp doesn't go beyond what any other coach does when going after officials. :laugh:
     
  16. fsugrad99

    fsugrad99 I'm the victim here
    Donor
    Florida State SeminolesTexas RangersAustin FCNXTAEW

    I want this post and the Clemson DABO DABO post meeting in the octagon.
     
    TC and Kirk Fogg like this.
  17. kslim

    kslim Guest

    What in the fuck is wrong with these people
     
  18. Teflon Queen

    Teflon Queen The mentally ill sit perfectly still
    Donor
    Auburn Tigers

    Fwiw many of us despise Rod and Stan
     
  19. (Z)

    (Z) Well-Known Member
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideBoston Red Sox

    Oh, I know. But to think that the two people acting like that in that video are not Bunker posters, but instead alleged professionals hired to represent the University in official broadcasts is unbelievably embarrassing.
     
    Tiffin, Barves2125, Kirk Fogg and 3 others like this.
  20. Teflon Queen

    Teflon Queen The mentally ill sit perfectly still
    Donor
    Auburn Tigers

    No denying that...I tell myself that the majority of the embarrassing behavior is a result of our older generations of fans
     
    Hide&SeekChamp and InZahnWeTrust like this.
  21. InZahnWeTrust

    InZahnWeTrust Well-Known Member
    Auburn TigersPhiladelphia PhilliesPhiladelphia 76'ersPhiladelphia EaglesPhiladelphia Flyers

    Some random old ass auburn fan came up to my family when we were walking out of the game and just wanted to vent to some strangers for whatever reason. He was complaining about how Auburn's class act coaches would have kneeled the ball on 4th down with only seconds left giving the ball back to the other team instead of allowing Derrick Henry to score. I would be furious if we did that.
     
    Clown Baby likes this.
  22. War Grundle

    War Grundle Nole Mercy
    Donor
    Florida State SeminolesTampa Bay Rays

    I was listening to the broadcast on XM while in the car and I couldnt believe how they were acting.
     
  23. Can I Spliff it

    Can I Spliff it Is Butterbean okay?
    Donor

    I'm glad this thread was remad
     
  24. (Z)

    (Z) Well-Known Member
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideBoston Red Sox

    Phillip Marshall is writing soothing words for the masses. Don't worry guys, next year is better just because Gus never has two bad offensive years in a row!

    "Is it time for calm? Is it time for Auburn folks still stinging from a football season gone bad to take a deep breath? Could it be that things aren’t as bad as they seem to so many? Could the future actually hold promise more than doom?

    [​IMG]
    Five-star defensive lineman Marlon Davidson of Greenville High School must not think Auburn football is a lost cause. He could have signed almost anywhere, but he’ll play for Auburn. Dynamic junior college quarterback John Franklin III chose Auburn, too. Yet another major recruiting coup could be coming today.

    No, this is not a recruiting column. I’ll leave that to our own Keith Niebuhr, who does it better than anybody. This is an attempt to take an honest look at where Auburn football is, at what a 6-6 season means.

    And the more I look, the less reason I see for panic.

    Does Auburn have holes to fill? No doubt. Filling some of them – linebacker, for example – will be challenging. Someone absolutely must step forward at quarterback. But there are lots of talented players in the Auburn football program. Lots of them..

    The quarterback issues that have plagued this season – Jeremy Johnson’s struggles and Sean White’s injury – have led to maybe the worst offensive showing of Gus Malzahn’s time as a head coach or an offensive coordinator. And there just isn’t any reason, based on Malzahn’s history, to expect that to repeat itself.

    Malzahn still has to hire a defensive coordinator, which he will do. He still needs to take a hard look at the inner workings of his program. He still needs to have more trust for more people. I’m not here to say there are no issues. But I don’t see a program in crash mode. I see a program that, with just a few things going right, can bounce back hard next season.

    Of course, this season isn’t over yet. There is a game still to play against Memphis in the Birmingham Bowl. A win would be nice for Auburn players, especially the seniors who are two years removed from helping win an SEC championship. A loss would be, well, irritating for Auburn folks everywhere.

    Either way, the Birmingham Bowl won’t set the future course of Auburn football.

    This Auburn team never did back down, never did stop playing hard and was in the fight in game after game, including the last one against Alabama.

    It’s not far from there to success. Can Auburn make that jump next season? Nobody knows, of course. But there certainly is reason to believe better days are ahead."
     
  25. fsugrad99

    fsugrad99 I'm the victim here
    Donor
    Florida State SeminolesTexas RangersAustin FCNXTAEW

    So, that's basically the wordy version of the This is Fine dog
     
  26. joey jo-jo jr shabadoo

    joey jo-jo jr shabadoo you know for me, the action is the juice

    Phil must have missed the LSU game.
     
    Swim Cantore likes this.
  27. Duvel

    Duvel Single Malts, Strong Pale Ales
    Donor TMB OG
    Alabama Crimson TideNew Orleans Pelicans

  28. Redav

    Redav One big ocean
    Donor

    This amazing duo combined to win half of their games!
     
  29. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby Daddy’s #1 Candy Baby
    Donor

    Who is the other Boom brother?
     
  30. Jax Teller

    Jax Teller Well-Known Member
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideAtlanta BravesTennessee TitansNashville PredatorsNashville SC

  31. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
    Donor
    Auburn TigersAtlanta BravesWashington Football TeamAtlanta United

    :smug:
     
    Redav likes this.
  32. SenatorClayDavis

    Donor

    GFTempletonAll-American
    Gold Member
    Joined:
    Dec 15, 2012
    Messages:
    4,747
    Likes Received:
    527
    Saban was 9-2 in his first year as head coach
    Malzahn was 10-3

    Saban got hired at Michigan State, went 19-16-1 his first 3 years
    Malzahn got hired by AU, went 27-13 his first 3 years

    Saban went 6-6 in his next year at Michigan St

    It seems like Malzahn is ahead of the curve and deserves some patience

    1 GFTempleton, Yesterday at 3:05 PM


    GFTempletonAll-American
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Dec 15, 2012
    Messages:
    4,747
    Likes Received:
    527
    Malzahn could be every bit the beast Saban is, minus the cheating and poor ethics. I'm not sure AU people are willing to stoop to the level bammer has to have its dynasty

    [​IMG]
    wwatsonAll-SEC
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 26, 2006
    Messages:
    720
    Likes Received:
    48
    Gus Malzahn is a better man with better character than Nick Saban. Given a choice between the two I will take Malzahn.
    [​IMG]
    wwatsonAll-SEC
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 26, 2006
    Messages:
    720
    Likes Received:
    48
    From us old school guys, we would rather take Coach Jordan over Coach Bryant as well. It does not mean that we do not want to win and will not work hard to win. It means that we will NOT stoop to do the illegal and wrong things that Coach Bryant used to do and Coach Saban are doing to win.
     
  33. fsugrad99

    fsugrad99 I'm the victim here
    Donor
    Florida State SeminolesTexas RangersAustin FCNXTAEW

  34. JohnLocke

    JohnLocke Terminally Chill
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideChicago CubsMemphis GrizzliesTennessee TitansNashville Predators

    "They're having another great year on paper, but why do you give a damn?

    The entirety of how they have landed here is based upon benefits given to players that far exceed anything other schools do to get players, along with their earlier road under Bryant being paved with much of the same brick, bending the rules at every turn.

    One school might shell out some money for 1-2 players with minimal contributions throughout the season. Bama shells out money, chargers, and escalades for their entire signing class every year. Not to mention the constant deer antler spraying, juicing, and bending the rules at every corner.

    Stop acting like they deserve the success they have.

    Stop acting like other teams did anything wrong to be in the position they're in when they have to play a semi-pro team and get blown out of the stadium, or have ten blown holding calls against them in one game.

    Stop acting like they are anything other than the cheating, low scum of the earth that they are.

    If I have to see one more person on this board go off on a tangent about "you have to respect the success that they've had", or "you can't deny what they've done," I'm going to facking scream.

    Stop being guilted into some false sense of sportsmanship that you have to be nice about what they do, have done, and will continue to do. They are nothing more than the embodiment of all things corrupt and wrong with college athletics, and to say otherwise is treason against humanity.

    /endrant."

    1 Jthedestroya
     
  35. Jake Barnes

    Jake Barnes Team Mac OG
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideAtlanta BravesAtlanta Falcons


    :ohgosh: this rant

    [x] comparison to Bear cheatin' at 'cruitin
    [x] chargers
    [x] deer antler spray
    [x] "we'd rather lose the right way" moral victory
    [x] scourge against humanity

    Only thing missing was a spUAT reference
     
  36. Phil Connors

    Donor TMB OG
    Alabama Crimson Tide

    My heart flutters every time this thread gets bumped.
     
  37. fsugrad99

    fsugrad99 I'm the victim here
    Donor
    Florida State SeminolesTexas RangersAustin FCNXTAEW

    May be able to do a Bunker v Gator Country thread.

    I mean, The Bunk would still win, but it would be competitive.
     
  38. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby Daddy’s #1 Candy Baby
    Donor

    Don't forget the #Gashening reference. Only ten blown holding calls and Auburn out-hearts a semi-pro team.
     
  39. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby Daddy’s #1 Candy Baby
    Donor

    Show us the comments! We want to see the comments!
     
  40. Nug

    Nug MexicanNug
    Donor
    Alabama Crimson TideSeattle MarinersAtlanta BravesNew Orleans Saints

    Deer antler sprayin'
     
    dump, Long Ball Larry and Tiffin like this.
  41. UncleJesse

    UncleJesse Did I invent hip-hop? No, but I was there.
    Donor TMB OG
    Alabama Crimson TideAtlanta BravesPhoenix SunsDallas Cowboys

    The stylin, profilin, limousine riding, jet flying, kiss-stealing, deer antler sprayin, wheelin n' dealin son of a gun.
    [​IMG]
     
  42. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby Daddy’s #1 Candy Baby
    Donor

  43. southlick

    southlick "Better Than You"
    Donor TMB OG
    Alabama Crimson TideAtlanta BravesNew Orleans PelicansDallas CowboysBirmingham Legion

  44. Clown Baby

    Clown Baby Daddy’s #1 Candy Baby
    Donor

  45. SenatorClayDavis

    Donor

    [​IMG]
    AU_Tiger2008All-American
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 2, 2007
    Messages:
    4,635
    Likes Received:
    315
    Location:
    Huntsville/Andalusia
    I can tell you that the Manning boys wouldn't act that way... Tim Tebow wouldn't act that way. Len Dawson didn't act that way.

    If I was an NFL QB I'd continuously ask myself WWJD, WWPD, WWTTD

    9 AU_Tiger2008, 43 minutes ago
     
    three stacks, IanC, Redav and 3 others like this.
  46. SenatorClayDavis

    Donor

    This guy is a gold mine.
    [​IMG]
    AU_Tiger2008All-American
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 2, 2007
    Messages:
    4,635
    Likes Received:
    315
    Location:
    Huntsville/Andalusia

    "The teen birth rate has declined almost continuously over the past 20 years."

    http://www.hhs.gov/ash/oah/adolescent-health-topics/reproductive-health/teen-pregnancy/trends.html
    Morals stared declining sharply with the onset of "Elvis the Pelvis" and the damn hippies of the 60s. I asked you whether pregnancies are down since 1950, 1900, 1850...
    Your pregnancy numbers are as meaningless as global warming.
     
  47. Beachy Toast

    Beachy Toast He wants you too, Malachi.
    Donor
    Chicago White SoxChicago BearsChicago BlackhawksKansas State WildcatsMontreal Impact

    Auburn really is a special place.