Posted in travel thread, but adding here because I had no idea Zika was still a big scare. Not sure if any of y'all have been warned by your doctor to watch the Caribbean but ours was very serious it's still very bad. Sister in law is getting married next month in Jamaica. We had our 8 week appointment with the doc yesterday and she basically told my wife DO NOT go to the wedding. Sorry not sorry, but it's still bad in Caribbean (I didn't want to go to the wedding so we just got the biggest get out of jail free card ever, but her sister is going to flip - she's a huge drama queen even though she's 35 years old, and has caused nothing but problems since getting engaged)
oh it's been a big meltdown for a few months now. I legit feel bad for my wife for having to tell her, but the showers are over and she lives in Orlando so we won't even see her until after the wedding. Backstory if interested Spoiler SIL and her fiance are BOTH changing their last names at the wedding. He apparently doesn't get along/or like his family, I'm not sure, so he wants a 'fresh start'. Whatever, I gave my two cents to him about being your own man and you make your name, but you do you my man. Where we come in? They are changing their name to my wife & sister in law's mother's maiden name (follow that? ha). Problem with this? My 15 month old son is literally named this. So it pissed my wife off that she is basically taking the name as well, she expressed this at Christmas and just told her how she felt and said there are literally billions of names available, why this one? Her fiance had only even met the grandparents on that side once (I had been around the family years and her grandpa and I are quite close, so we felt we had a good reason to honor them by naming our son Clarke) Well 2 months go by and her sister basically says I thought about it but I'm doing it anyways. So my wife was considering not going to the wedding anyways, cool heads prevailed and we got travel all lined up, and now full circle we can't go lol It's just girl/sister drama, and I have to play mediator which is tough cause I don't enjoy my SIL all that much, but can't add fuel to the fire when she pisses off my wife. Try to keep the peace
I think I would be a fan. Either a good reason to wrap a vacation around one or solid enough reason not to go if you don't want to. Granted, I've never actually been to one but that's just my logic.
think it depends on who it is. I wasn't pumped for my SIL, but my FIL at least was paying for our room, we just paid for travel (all moot point now) but I had a friend do one in cancun, so it was basically a pre-planned group vacation for me and all my friends + spouses and we got to hang for a week on the beach together. It was a blast.
I think it’s weird as fuck that they're both changing their names, but I feel like your son’s first name and their last name can be the same thing and it not be that big of a deal
Went out to dinner tonight with my 4 year and 22 month old. Big mistake. Number of broken dishes: 3 - all by 22 month old. He was also taking French fries, dipping them in ketchup and sucking the ketchup off and putting the fry back on 4 year olds plate. I spent about half the dinner walking around outside with him.
*Raises hand* But we both just turned 40 and RiotJr is just at a year. While we both love our son more than anything else neither of us wants to go through the short-no sleep early months again. Especially considering we’d probably wait until he’s 3-4 to start trying again. I’ve found just a short “No he’ll be our only one.” when asked usually ends the inquiries from friends and family.
This is where we're at. My dad was an only child so he made sure to have multiple kids, but I just don't think our sanity and marriage can handle it. I would really like for my daughter to have a sibling, but I just can't seeing us going through all this again. I know it may be easier the second time around, but two kids seems like we'll have absolutely no rest.
We’ve stopped going out to eat because it’s just not enjoyable. Between the 3yo wasting food and the 1yo throwing it everywhere, restaurants are a hard pass for the foreseeable future.
So... It’s Mother’s Day. I got my wife a pedicure and foot/leg massage for this evening. She added on a 30 minute shoulder/arm/hand massage so she essentially got a 90 minute pedicure/chair massage. She comes home smiling ear to ear talking about it being the best spa experience she’s ever had. She is on cloud nine so I, of course, start giving her shit. We are in the kitchen and the kids are downstairs watching Sesame Street. Me: I’m going to have to thank these folks tomorrow. Mother’s Day anal sex thanks to that spa. Her: Uh huh My 3 yo from downstairs: DADA WHATS ANAL SEX Spoiler I told him I said “place your bets” and he bought it, but I’m not going to be able to make any more butt sex jokes if he doesn’t keep his mouth shut.
hey bro the crew is getting back together at marks request . we gonna have a fish fry . specs and catfish .
I guess I’m in the minority here. Going from 0 to 1 kid was a life changing shock to the system. Going from 1 to 2 just means that the house is messier. The adjustment from having no kids to having a kid was the hardest time of my adult life. The addition of a second was just meh on the impact scale. With that being said...there will absolutely not be a third.
Agreed. The second one has been pretty easy even though he has been more high maintenance than the first. Also don’t think I want a third enough to actively try for it.
My daughter for years has wanted a cat. I tell her all the time I am allergic because years ago my wife brought one home and it drove me crazy and she gave it back after a week. Fast forward to my daughters piano lesson last week. At the lady’s house she has 5 cats. I’m not in there 5 minutes and my eyes were watering and nose running. Is it possible to talk yourself in to an allergy? On the positive my daughter saw my reaction and now cats are definitely out of the question.
feel really bad for my wife, pregnancy #2 has been miserable, much sicker, was just nausea for long periods last time, this time she's actually puking. Add-in she is chasing around a 15 month old so she can't just lounge all day. Perk? she is pro stopping after 2 now which is what I originally wanted
From that Yanny or Laurel thread, I noticed that if my kids’ are near, I can hear Yanny. I guess since little kids have higher pitched voices (and I keep a vigilant ear out for them), it makes me pick up on it in the recording...?
Same, I could not even consider Laurel until I saw a clip where the bass was adjusted (or some effect added). Also, WHO IN THE HELL CARES UGHHHH (wrong thread I know).
This is almost exactly my life right now. Wife is getting on the daily during this second pregnancy and feels completely miserable pretty much all the time. I feel like I've been doing literally everything around the house which sucks but she is adamant that we aren't having another because she said she can't deal with this again. I'm good with it.
Had my daughter's Kindergarten round up this morning. There must have been some dust inside of the school as she was walking to her class with her teacher.
99.9% certain we are done after the 3rd. On the other hand, my sister-in-law will be 38 this year and her husband is like 42ish, they are talking (pretty seriously) about having a 5th kid....they just had their 4th this past December.
I'm not concerned, they are nothing alike and she thinks they are crazy too. I just can't imagine having kids at that age when you already have 4 to begin with.
LMAO at the 0 vs 1 vs 2 debate on this page which seems to come up every few pages. 1-3 is easy..child's play, I can tell you some crazy shit that happens with 6 kids. It includes never seeing your floor, never taking a shit by yourself and when it is quiet at night it feels weird and you turn the TV on because you need the noise to fall asleep. Also I think a few months ago I posted our food budget for a week if you care to look it up. Update on the IHYT circus: We are very close to finalizing the adoption, the kids are restless, we are exhausted. Adopting foster kids can be 6 to 12 months, but since we were the foster parents it is supposed to be smooth1-2 months tops, well 5 months later we are still waiting. We decided to move forward with adoption in February and it should have been wrapped up by end of March. 1st step was the conversion of our foster license to adoption. The nice lady handling our transfer of licensure with the State of Florida had a death in the family and took a brief sabbatical. That sucks. Ok, can't someone else do it...yeah but the only other adoption agent in our county happens to also be our girls' therapist so it's a conflict of interest...so we waited. Next DCF gave us paperwork to schedule our FBI/FDLE background checks...which we have done probably 25 times in the last 5 years, including this past January, but for adoption they need another set. Only this time DCF forgot to pay the contractor who take and runs the check...we wait another 4 weeks for the State to pay their bill and get it done. Next subsidy agreement with the State and Feds, after weeks of back and forth trying to get a subsidy payment agreement with DCF arranged we are told it now has to be approved by the Feds who supply the grant money. We are told it is a formality. Apparently the rubber stamp broke because it was rejected and sent back and we still are not sure why but DCF insists that they re-sent it in checking all the boxes correctly and assure us this time it should be approved.... we shall see. And yes the lawyers, can't forget about them. We get to pick from a list of local family atty's that DCF has on retainer to process the name changes and motion for order of adoption, all paid for by DCF. They contacted us 1 time, 2 months ago, to get the new names of the kids and nothing since... of course it's is because DCF has not sent them anything. It could also be the State's attorney who, although won the trial and all parental rights to the kids were lost, she (DCF) never filed the motion to put the kids up for adoption. So from September until last week the kids were literally in legal limbo until the order was filed and approved for adoption. After all this we get "Final Disclosure" where adoptive parents get copies of everything DCF has on the kids. Basically we already have all this as usually the foster parents provide most the information. We go in and they start breezing through all the medical stuff, reports cards and abuse reports, all of which we have on file....and then we see something new. An abuse report made by the oldest against her dad in 2009 about him sexually abusing her. No one had seen this before, the child investigator, the court, the attorneys, DCF or us. It was not "linked" to the girl's case because no evidence was found to corroborate the claim, therefore not added to the DCF file and the claim originated in a separate county. Claim said child reported multiple incidents of dad doing not good things. So now we are trying to get that county to provide all the records for that file so we can let the therapist know and so we can deal with the trauma. We always suspected this, but to have it documented and never acted upon seems almost criminal. Anyways long and short of it, still waiting and hoping in June we will have a huge party at the courthouse for the adoption of all 3 but at this point everyone has adoption fatigue. The girls starting acting up last month and turns out they thought we had changed our minds about wanting to adopt them and that's why it was taking so long and they were clearly pulling away from us. I just am ready to put this all behind us.
fair enough, I can see why folks may seem that's too much detail, I'll take it out, but fact of the matter is, that stuff happens to kids way more than people realize, like way more.
So my wife is traveling for work and I've got afterschool child care for a few days here. I decided to do a little organizing in the kids playroom. In case it is helpful to any other dads out there, I thought I'd share my flow chart for what to do with random toys/toy pieces/UKOs (unidentified kid objects): 1. Will anyone ever look for this? If no, throw it away. If yes, move to 2. 2. Would anyone have found this if they ever looked for it? If no, throw it away. If yes . . . I haven't gotten this far yet. I'll update you if I do.
Damn man no good deed goes unpunished. Hope everything gets straightened out and your kids become official and your daughter gets the therapy she needs. Best of luck and keep us updated
I’ve gotten myself in the doghouse for doing this multiple times. I’ll get frustrated/pissed and just start filling garbage bags, things I think are insignificant but my wife must have a photographic memory because she’ll notice things months later. This applies to all kinds of things, not just kid’s stuff.
Yup. One reason is simply the money right now, I mean we could afford it but it'd be very tight, and we wouldn't be able to afford to go do the things we enjoy with our daughter. Another is the money when she's older, highschool/driving all that - I'll need to win the lotto as it is. We also have been very lucky with a happy, healthy, easy to raise child - why rock the boat, we're all happy as can be.
What do monthly expenses look like during the first year? As a first time parent I have no idea what to expect. Housing, health insurance, childcare, and (hopefully) food are already covered.