Stupid shit your wife/girlfriend does...

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by bertwing, May 16, 2016.

  1. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    the fact that this happened to two women within the orbit of TMB means its happened hundreds or thousands of times this year and that just brings a warm smile to my face
     
  2. The Blackfish

    The Blackfish The Fish in Black
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    lol I think my son currently has perfect attendance
     
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  3. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    This came up due to the Ole Miss Beard hire thread but MLS had not seen the Marshall Henderson gif until literally this morning so now is heavily debating how many shirts to make with some form of screenshot of it in addition to the "Lane is Daddy" shirts that are already confirmed.

    On a scale of 1-10 how much security will I need to hire for this #Auburn Tigers

    This is a crew of girls coming in hot for the football game this year at Auburn - I really don't even want to attend at this point due to the imminent amount of stress and obvious camera time.
     
  4. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    Literally no one will care

    HTH
     
  5. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Pretty much figured that - I didn't think anyone would give a shit about the Lane one but thought there could be some potential hot-button people on the Marshall one.

    Gotta be honest - my biggest dread is if both of our teams somehow manage to be decent and it actually got any tv attention.
     
    Dump likes this.
  6. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    Marshall was like a decade ago and nearly no one cares about what the fans of a lesser SEC program does
     
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  7. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    Auburn is also probably the softest fanbase on earth whom try to pride themselves on being Jesus-like and accepting others into our fambuleh for a wonderful Saturday on the plains
     
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  8. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    This is the hottest of takes and I'll include my own school in that.

    But fine I'll attend also.
     
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  9. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    It's an obvious fact as pointed out in many other threads
     
  10. MLS

    MLS Well-Known Member
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    Look, I'm still working on this

    It's probably just going to be a Marshall Ole Miss Jersey with an under cut off shirt that says Lane is Daddy

    We're definitely still going to need security just to avoid several getting completely lost
     
    Dump likes this.
  11. wes tegg

    wes tegg I'm a Guy's guy, guys.
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    WED is right; they’re super soft. They are cripplingly insecure, though. Auburn fans get really mad when you compare the city/campus to Starkville, even affectionately.
     
  12. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Please don't provide any additional ideas of shittalking for MLS
     
  13. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    The cow pastures enhances the vibe of being a village....the loveliest village. We don't want to be a city, dirty lib
     
    Cornfed Buffalo, MLS, One Two and 3 others like this.
  14. El Tiburon

    El Tiburon Well-Known Member
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    Special fucking place.
     
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  15. One Two

    One Two Shoulders like James Caan
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    Nice try Wesley!

    A0CA6F8C-C6E9-474A-9BD5-49E94EC52E38.png
     
    wes tegg likes this.
  16. HuskerInMiami

    HuskerInMiami Well-Known Member
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    My wife and all the girls in my family went on a 3 night cruise two weekends ago. When she came back, she had 14(!!!) packages.... I left them all by the entryway and everyone on the cruise came to our house after the cruise/before flying out and they all were like ,"WTF, why are there so many boxes". Since then I think we've only received 2 packages.
     
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  17. HuskerInMiami

    HuskerInMiami Well-Known Member
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    My mom bought tickets for her and I to go to the Cowboys vs Chiefs when I was a kid. We drove to KC and realized the game was in Dallas.
     
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  18. One Two

    One Two Shoulders like James Caan
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    This is premium content
     
  19. CF3234

    CF3234 Fan of: Bandwagons
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    My now wife once booked me a trip to meet her and her family out in northern iceland. Whole trip was 3 flights.

    Flight 1: Miami-Boston
    Flight 2: Boston-Iceland
    Flight 3: Southern Iceland-Northern Iceland.

    One small problem. The flight to northern iceland was at a completely different airport over an hour away when I had a total layover of about 2 hours. That was quite the stressful 2 hours and an expensive as shit taxi ride.
     
  20. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    How much time were you actually able to spend there? Removing all forms of transit and hotel checkin amount of time.

    That sounds like a whirlwind.
     
  21. CF3234

    CF3234 Fan of: Bandwagons
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    We spent a week in iceland. It was awesome. Love that country. They continued on to Europe, but I had to go back home, was new to my job at that point and couldn't afford to take 2+ weeks off of work.
     
  22. LetItSoak

    LetItSoak Well-Known Member
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    A few years ago my wife's friend bought her husband tickets to the Bucs/Falcons game for his birthday (they're falcons fans) along with flights and a hotel. They get to the airport and run into our good friend who is from Tampa and going home to see family for the weekend. They told him about their trip and he starts cracking up because it was a Falcons home game. They ended up watching it at a bar in Tampa
     
    #17372 LetItSoak, Mar 14, 2023
    Last edited: Mar 14, 2023
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  23. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Fully falling on my sword here that I misread it somehow and thought you said this trip had to be accomplished in 3 days and was just thinking of how much of a shitshow that would be as a gift.
     
  24. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    I know a girl who pisses the bed, but only when she drinks alcohol.

    So…every day.
     
  25. MLS

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    At some point there should be a ranking for the thread

    I hope I'm not included but obviously our neighbor's daughter is up there
     
  26. fattus

    fattus Well-Known Member
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    I’m not a woman but i’d probably be top 5.
     
    Eathan Edwards, Dump and beerme like this.
  27. MLS

    MLS Well-Known Member
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    The person having to go to court for the herding cats or whatever is probably my favorite off the top of my head
     
  28. blind dog

    blind dog wps
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    bertwing 's wife wanting their child to take a real muzzle loader to school for some play is my fave off the top of my head
     
  29. MLS

    MLS Well-Known Member
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    Um, elaborate here unless you're just being sarcastic.
     
  30. The Blackfish

    The Blackfish The Fish in Black
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    southlick
     
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  31. blind dog

    blind dog wps
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    my bad on type of weapon
     
  32. MLS

    MLS Well-Known Member
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    Ok, that's a contender
     
  33. southlick

    southlick "Better Than You"
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  34. MLS

    MLS Well-Known Member
    Tampa Bay BuccaneersMississippi Rebels

    So thus far we have:

    southlick having to go to court for his wife feeding what I have to assume was an absurd amount of cats
    bertwing having to prevent his wife from taking an active firearm to a show and tell at school

    strong start
     
    #17384 MLS, Mar 14, 2023
    Last edited: Mar 14, 2023
  35. football501

    football501 I once ate a Twix with the wrapper on it
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    Someone's significant other rear ended them on the daily commute to work iirc
     
  36. beerme

    beerme Well-Known Member
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    I would like to resubmit my wife for wanting me to bring a cover to our neighbors house and ask them to put it on, or to cover half our house walls in aluminum foil because they got a 5G wifi electric meter
     
    #17386 beerme, Mar 14, 2023
    Last edited: Mar 14, 2023
  37. bertwing

    bertwing check out the nametag grandma
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    I started the initial thread because my wife backed our Denali into my sons Charger in our driveway, a few months after she backed into her moms car in our driveway. We had a rear camera and sensors beeping at her and everything.

    But definitely trying to let our daughter take a shotgun to Pioneer Day at school as a ~7 year old was definitely the blondest moment of her life
     
  38. beerme

    beerme Well-Known Member
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    yes we’ll change the thread title to “blondest shit your wife/girlfriend does”
     
    Dump and bertwing like this.
  39. southlick

    southlick "Better Than You"
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    I bought a solar powered light to hang off the top of my deck for some extra light at night for my dog.

    Well, where I decided to hang the light isn't getting enough solar to recharge it and probably won't for another few weeks because of how high the sun currently gets.

    I was telling my wife this and she says: well you'll get another hour of sun this weekend when the time changes so that should help.

    I was like:
    [​IMG]
     
  40. HotMic

    HotMic Insider
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    This is amazing
     
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  41. BayouMafia

    BayouMafia Thought Leader in Posting
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    more endearing than anything, but had my dad or stepdad had a TMB of their own when I was a kid this would have been a submission

    when I was going to start playing T-ball at age 5 my mom bought me a baseball glove. Since I'm right handed it made perfect sense to her to get a glove that goes on my right hand. Thankfully the kid next door who was a couple of years older came over and corrected the fact that I was trying to throw the ball while it was in my glove before I made it to the first practice that afternoon
     
  42. MLS

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    1st ballot
     
  43. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    not even.
     
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  44. MLS

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    I'm incorporating this with the court case of feeding cats, she's on a heater....and I for one, am here for it.
     
    Dump likes this.
  45. Gambler

    Gambler Hog Fan
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    Being in the wrong state for a game has got to get some 1st place votes.
     
  46. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    You're easily included on multiple fronts but I would say thinking a lion is a pet is up there.
     
    Dump and bigred77 like this.
  47. LetItSoak

    LetItSoak Well-Known Member
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    Cats at large was an absolute classic and I still chuckle any time I see more than 2 cats in someone's yard
     
  48. Cornfed Buffalo

    Cornfed Buffalo Prime Comin'
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    My guy is a Saint, who travels 15 minutes across town every Christmas to stay at his in-laws.
     
    #17398 Cornfed Buffalo, Mar 14, 2023
    Last edited: Mar 14, 2023
  49. CUgator

    CUgator Well-Known Member
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    :yolo:
     
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  50. Eathan Edwards

    Eathan Edwards Well-Known Member
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    Look buddy you've got to learn how to throw from the glove if you want to compete in Louisiana T-ball.
     
    Clemson327, One Two, Dump and 4 others like this.