So You Have A Daughter....

Discussion in 'The Mainboard' started by Celemo, Feb 11, 2016.

  1. BlazingRebel

    BlazingRebel Dog Crew Founder Migraine Connoisseur
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    Congrats dude, and good luck
     
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  2. dblplay1212

    dblplay1212 Well-Known Member
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  3. Detlef Schrempf

    Detlef Schrempf Well-Known Member
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    All of these things are why SVP is my favorite.

    Just found out we’ve got another one on the way, don’t know if it’s a boy or girl yet but come November we’ll add another to our two dogs, and our daughter who will be 26 months when baby gets here.
     
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  4. jaygabriel

    jaygabriel What the fuck Salami?!?!
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    Officially the father of a 10-year-old daughter today. I shudder to think what the next 4-5 years will be like.
     
  5. Nandor the Relentless

    Nandor the Relentless Former Leader of Al Quolanudar
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    What's the story here, adoption, married the girl's mom?
     
  6. Lenin

    Lenin sometimes you need to break a few eggs
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    or maybe his daughter had a fucking birthday you weirdo
     
  7. Nandor the Relentless

    Nandor the Relentless Former Leader of Al Quolanudar
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    Then he phrased his sentence very poorly.
     
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  8. Lenin

    Lenin sometimes you need to break a few eggs
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    :out:
     
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  9. JeremyLambsFace

    JeremyLambsFace For bookings contact Morgan at 702-374-3735
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    More like Nandor The Relentlessly Stupid ha ha
     
  10. Duck Smoker

    Duck Smoker I feel like I'm in a Lexus
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    Daughter is almost 16. I have a mid-life crisis sport sedan that has 400 HP V8/twin turbos. Wife is out of town with her vehicle for work, daughter's vehicle is in the shop, and we're cramming in hours of state-mandated, phone-tracked learner's permit driving in my car so she can get her license. Ask me anything about sheer terror and poor planning. Daughter also now constantly asking why she is stuck with having an old Rav4. Pretty good day, she saw 15 out of 18 stops signs. :facepalm:
     
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  11. Nandor the Relentless

    Nandor the Relentless Former Leader of Al Quolanudar
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    How dare you besmirch my name, I am a former king of Al Quolanudar!
     
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  12. AlternativeFactsRule

    AlternativeFactsRule Mmm ... Coconuts
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    This is a thing now?
     
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  13. bama1

    bama1 I like you
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    Got a birthday this coming weekend for one of my daughters friends.

    Anyone got any unique ideas for a gift for a 3 year old girl? It’s one of my best friends daughter who has everything she could want so struggling on ideas.
     
  14. D. Silver

    D. Silver Russian Gas
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    Just had our second girl 2 weeks ago.

    :smugdog:

    Don't care, daughters are awesome.
     
  15. Daddy Rabbit

    Daddy Rabbit But the second mouse gets the cheese
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    Fighting with my soon to be four year old. She is telling me no when I try to out her in a timeout.

    She had her tonsils taken out a week and half ago. It has been miserable since then.
     
  16. ~ taylor ~

    ~ taylor ~ Boom... head shot.
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    Pony.
     
  17. Duck Smoker

    Duck Smoker I feel like I'm in a Lexus
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    Speaking only for Colorado, yes.

    Edit: just learned app is voluntary, can track manually. You can fill out a log, or just press start/stop on app.
     
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  18. Joe_Pesci

    Joe_Pesci yello
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    Drum set
     
  19. bama1

    bama1 I like you
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    :laugh:

    My daughter is getting one some point this summer...:in-n-out:



    I seriously have no idea, Amazon isn’t much help either trying to find something target, Kohl’s etc doesn’t have
     
  20. Willpépé

    Willpépé Miles of D.
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    Chia pet.
     
  21. Daddy Rabbit

    Daddy Rabbit But the second mouse gets the cheese
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    Memberships to a science center, zoo, aquarium. Fuck buying another toy for a three year old.

    Open a 529 account in the parents name and donate money to it.
     
    Doug, dump, REGGNECK and 1 other person like this.
  22. Constant

    Constant Meh
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    Have done this for each of my grandchildren, and make a donation each birthday and Xmas.
     
    #522 Constant, May 20, 2019
    Last edited: May 20, 2019
  23. Detlef Schrempf

    Detlef Schrempf Well-Known Member
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    Please take this to the “So you have a granddaughter” thread.
     
  24. Constant

    Constant Meh
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    But it gets so lonely in there. :ohdear:
     
  25. tigergrad00

    tigergrad00 Well-Known Member
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    My oldest daughter turns 13 later this year and my youngest daughter just turned 2. Thankfully we had 2 boys between them but now I'm getting the joyous hell from both ends with the girls
     
  26. Celemo

    Celemo Meatball's Dad
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    Meatball has 3 friends over for his birthday sleepover, all 3 are showing off for Kendall
     
  27. Celemo

    Celemo Meatball's Dad
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    “Hey Kendall, check this out”
    (Does something dumb)
     
  28. Nandor the Relentless

    Nandor the Relentless Former Leader of Al Quolanudar
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    Get them to draw an NBA player. That will surely turn her off to them.
     
  29. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Older sister hot is one of the simple pleasures of a young boy’s life.
     
  30. ttuman10

    ttuman10 drink it ya asshole

    Got one due in November too so my kid will forever know his parents got down on Valentine’s.

    Btw this whole thread has made me dread the pre teen/teen years for my 2 and a half year old daughter
     
    dump likes this.
  31. Celemo

    Celemo Meatball's Dad
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    Her name was Carey and I know in the bottom of my heart she loved me and her brother’s spotless rendition of the Fresh Prince’s “Parents Just Don’t Understand”
     
  32. Lenin

    Lenin sometimes you need to break a few eggs
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    :awshucks:
     
  33. Arkadin

    Arkadin inefficiently efficent and unclearly clear
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    Celemo pls you were like 20 when that song came out
     
  34. Celemo

    Celemo Meatball's Dad
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    :ded:
     
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  35. WhiskeyDelta

    WhiskeyDelta Formerly MK3rds
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    I'm pretty sure 1/3 has started getting proto-boobs and I'm not ready for this.
     
  36. Name P. Redacted

    Name P. Redacted I have no money and I'm also gay
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    Proto-boobs? You mean like breast buds?
     
  37. kinghill

    kinghill Well-Known Member
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    same

    we're ready. we're dads. we can do this.

    wait, what do we have to do?
     
  38. Cardeja12

    Cardeja12 Well-Known Member
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    Are proto boobs a nice way to say starter titties? I'm in the dark here
     
  39. Willpépé

    Willpépé Miles of D.
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    Only one job. Steer away from douche bags. It’s the only thing you can do.
     
    Han Solo likes this.
  40. Nandor the Relentless

    Nandor the Relentless Former Leader of Al Quolanudar
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  41. Where Eagles Dare

    Where Eagles Dare The Specialist Show On Earth
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    That's my guess.

    I'm not up with the lingo of Dads speaking of little girls boobs. Clown Baby please help
     
  42. Pile Driving Miss Daisy

    Pile Driving Miss Daisy It angries up the blood
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  43. Celemo

    Celemo Meatball's Dad
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    So Kendall got blindsided by Israel (the boy she been kinda seeing) on Valentine's Day. Turns out Israel brought roses and chocolates to another girl at school today. She's in her room sobbing and the gift he got her last year (a small elephant plushie) is in her trashcan. I wasn't planning to murder a middle school boy today but here we are
     
  44. BudKilmer

    BudKilmer Well-Known Member
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    I’m your alibi homey. When the cops come calling, me and you were playing 2k.


    In the meantime I got a shovel, I’ll start digging.


    Signed,
    Girl dad
     
  45. Truman

    Truman Well-Known Member
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    A) shove the elephant up his ass
    B) bump your other thread
    ????
    Profit
     
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  46. ramszoolander

    ramszoolander Ferrous and Fabulous
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    Maaaaan I was still doing shit like that in college, I feel like.

    There are no girls in my family, all boys...even my mom didn't tell me not to do stuff like this...
     
  47. dblplay1212

    dblplay1212 Well-Known Member
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    Wife called me extra for sending our 2 year old flowers to daycare. Don't even care.
     
  48. Homo Erectus

    Homo Erectus Well-Known Member
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    Sneaky fucking Israeli's lol
     
  49. Celemo

    Celemo Meatball's Dad
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    Well I kinda talked her off the ledge. Told her about some of my greatest failed romances

    8th grade: had a huge crush on a girl, Leesha. Worked up the courage to ask her out and got shot down big time

    9th grade: was seeing a girl named Jessica and thought it was true love...she moved away and was seeing someone else like a week later

    10th grade: my “alternative” aka hipster gf Dena left me for a Vanilla Ice lookalike she met at a MC Hammer concert

    11th grade: turns out Melissa was a cheating whore

    12th grade: my gf Amanda was still hung up on her old bf and was waiting for him to take her back.

    explained to her the first heartbreak is the hardest and it won’t be the last time this happens either...fuck
     
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  50. ned's head

    ned's head Well-Known Member

    Sounds like you dodged a bullet. Although you might want to ask her if little israel taught her how to spell any words