Stupid shit your wife/girlfriend does...

I don’t think you understand, man, ROBIN WILLAIMS IS MRS DOUBTFIRE

 

No, but I have seen Goonies.

 

my wife and I do outlook calendar invites for everything. so if she plans a dinner with our friends i get an invite. My golf trip in June? Already on the calendar. Her spa appointments go in there as well. It's especially helpful during the holidays where we are both getting invited and coordinating family/friend/work parties.

 

I too run my marriage like a business. Really helps frame my cost cutting measures.

 

I had the same thought when she started sending them but it has avoided so many little arguments because one of us forgets a text they received months before.

"Oh remember this is my golf trip weekend" is never the beginning of a fun talk.

 

My wife and I try to schedule conference calls from time to time. Really helps strengthen the core competencies in our marriage and build synergistic relationships with others outside of our brand. Our market share has really increased since we adopted this highly scalable approach.

 

BUT WHAT ABOUT SYNERGY????

 

We use google calendar and it's a god send. No shot I'm remembering all the random shit always going on.

 

at the end of the day, things like this will make us stronger from top to bottom

 

every time we're watching a tv show or movie that shows a shot of a pig or a cow i always incredulously say ".....what's my ex wife doing in this show?!?!"

she hates it

 

While I liked all the jokes itt, the shared calendar thing is extremely useful

 

Same. My schedule is extremely scatter and has various hours throughout the day week and weekend when I have to work a certain times. I wish my wife could see my active calendar and updates but I’m not sure how to accomplish that without putting my work outlook on her phone.

 

I was going to say it's harder if your wife isn't working or doesn't use Outlook. We are both on Outlook all day for work so we just send invites to one another to share an "event."

 

Yeah. I’ve tried to send her a link to my calendar but it doesn’t show it working as my schedule constantly changes. I cover a wide swatch of area so it’d be nice for he to see what county I’m in as well so I don’t get the daily text message asking if I’m close by.

 

location sharing is also helpful on iphones to avoid those kind of text messages. Just gotta slide it into airplane mode before you get to the titty bar.

 

My wife does all of the calendar updates and it's 90% helpful and 10% her getting me to agree to boring shit 9 months out and then locking it in via Outlook.

Middle of a football game "do you want to go to a long dinner with a couple we both find boring at a place you don't like in May?" "Yea sure, whatever." 8 months later I get a reminder in Outlook ... FUCK!

 

Holy shit man; spoiler that stuff.

 

You ever heard to the scorpion and the frog?

 

Wife just lost $30 trying to buy concert tickets off Facebook. Xferred the money thru PayPal and the person vanished and because she did it thru friends/family she can't refute the charge

 

Friend of mine did this for AFC championship tickets. He lost more than $30. All to avoid stubhub fees

 

Anyone who does this deserves to get scammed. There is a reason PayPal calls it friends and family.

 

Really bad signal around the titty bar I've heard.

 

Re: wife is clueless loading dishwasher.
Wife says "can you help me unload the dishwasher? "

Heck yea I can, I know there is only like 5 dishes total in there

 

I envy you. Mine throws as much shit in there as possible and I end up having to rewash1/2 of it.

 

Anytime she sees me typing something on TMB she says “stop trolling”. Annoys me so much.

 

My wife: “Are you reading your blog again?”

 

Me .. repeats something from the news
Her .. oh you read that on the man board ..
( in a condescending bitch voice )

 

My sweet wife who definitely will never see this would never besmirch the boys chats. What an angel

 

My wife calls it the football blog and doesn't question when it yields advice on anything from home improvement items or underwear.

 

Today she gets the last laugh.

 

Same. She'll stack shit the wrong way, bowls facing up, etc.

 

Last night I received a text saying "I think I used too much bleach".

I replied asking her what is going on and did she open the windows, etc. Said she sprayed bleach in toilets and shower and just left it there.

Got home from work kinda late 9pm, she was asleep. Entire place reeked of bleach, pretty bad. She hadn't even brushed/cleaned the toilets, just sprayed bleach in there. I cleaned the toilets and rinsed the 2 showers real well, opened all windows, fans going, etc. Fucking hell.

 

good team work

 

Asleep at 9pm?

 

At a st Patrick’s day party in Atlanta that I was skeptical about coming to in piedmont park, but girlfriend was adamant about attending. Upon arrival I go to the bar and she gets a table. Immediately befriends a gentlemen who just flew in from Seattle fucking Washington, ensuring that we’ll contract the virus.

 

Order the strongest alcohol possible and sanitize yourself

 

Your only option is to put it in his butt

 

Stupid shit Savage Rob Chubb does imo

 

She knows you all too well

 

The gene pool will miss you both.

 

Will it??

 

Savage Rob Chubb how was the threesome?

 

This is your fault for going to luckyfest in the first place.

 

MrOwlTheWorldWillNeverKnow.gif

 

Was looking at our bank account and my wife just spent over $100 stocking up on elderberry.

oh and my son still has allergies two years after quoted post above

 

U imagine this thread is about to see quite the spike.